Digimon Fan Fiction / Flint The Time Detective Fan Fiction / Monster Rancher Fan Fiction / Pokemon Fan Fiction / Pokemon Fan Fiction / Ranma 1/2 Fan Fiction / Slayers Fan Fiction / Tenchi Muyo Fan Fiction / Utena, Revolutionary Girl Fan Fiction / Magic Knight Rayearth Fan Fiction / Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction ❯ Anime Arena ❯ Most Annoying Losers on the Face of the Earth ( Chapter 4 )

Kimi: Hi hi!! It's Kimi, back to torture all you Anime Arena fans once again!

*Kimi's conscience and Anti-Conscience `pop' in, and the little angle dives straight at Kimi*

Kimi (diving under a conveniently located table): Aaaaaaaaaah!

*Kimi's conscience swerves under the table and hits Kimi full-throttle, knocking the wind out of her*

Conscience (snuggling against the wheezing girl's arm): Mesas glomp Kimi!

Kimi (after taking a few moments to recover and pulling the chibi off of her arm): If you ever `glomp' me again, I'll sick AC after you!

*Kimi's anti-conscience smirks at her counterpart, who hides behind Kimi and starts clinging to her arm*

Kimi: Besides, is glomp even a real word?

Conscience: Mesas finds out! *`Pop's away*

Anti-Conscience (sighing in exasperation): It doesn't matter if it's a word or not, let's just get on with the fanfiction!

Kimi: I dunno…I'm kind of curious as to what's she's up to.

Anti-Conscience (glaring at Kimi): Ever hear the expression, "Curiosity killed the cat?"

Kimi (returning the glare with a very Heero-like death glare of her own): You're the one who killed him! Or did you forget already?

Anti-Conscience: Heh heh…

Conscience (`Pop'ing in once more, this time with an extraordinarily large dictionary): Hmm…*flipping through the pages* … a… aardvark… aback… abacus… abaft… abalone… abandon… abandoned… abase… abash… abate… abattoir…

Kimi: Um…maybe you should start with the `G's?

Conscience: Wuz da fun in dat? ^_^ Abduct… abeam… abed… Abel… aberration… abet… abeyance… abhor… abhorrent…

*The little chibi-angel continues on like this. Kimi and her anti-conscience stare at her for several minutes before finally coming to their senses*

Anti-Conscience: Can I…hurt her?

Kimi: Normally I would say yes, but I want to see if this will actually help her, uh… limited… vocabulary.

Anti-Conscience: I doubt it.

Conscience: … account… accountable… accountant… accounting…

Kimi: Seem to be a lot of words you can `account' on.

*Canned laughter is heard*

Anti-Conscience: Was that…a pun?!

Kimi: Forgive me!! I repent!!!! PLEASE DON'T HURT ME!!! *runs off screaming*

Anti-Conscience: That was odd and extremely out of character… Do you think something's wrong with Kimi?

Conscience: Yesh!!! Acumen… acupuncture… acute… acute accent… acyclovir… ad… AD… adage… adagio… adamant… Adam's apple… adapt… adaptable… add… addend… addendum… adder… addict…addition…additional… additive… addle… address… addressee… adduce… adenine…

Anti-Conscience: Are you ever going to shut up?

Conscience: Nopes!!! Adverb… adversarial… adversary… adverse…

Anti-Conscience (rolling her eyes): Right… *turns toward the audience* Anyway, today we're going to be having the Ginyu Force and the 1st season Power Rangers (if you have a complaint about them not being anime characters, you can discuss it with my flame-thrower) fight it out for the title of most annoying losers on the face of the Earth. Unfortunately, the Ginyu Force is currently residing in the Home for Infinite Losers (where they belong), which poses a bit of a problem. So, to rectify the situation, I shot the Power Rangers, who have now joined the Ginyu Force in the Home for Infinite Losers (where they, too, belong). I guess that means we have to change the title to `Most Annoying Losers in the Home for Infinite Losers'... no matter. Let's just go to the fight!

*The all-purpose (cultural) TV (nuku nuku!) comes down and turns on, and Kimi's anti-conscience goes off to search for Kimi. Meanwhile, in the Home for Infinite Losers…*

Red Ranger: Um, guys? Where are we?

Yellow Ranger: I don't know, but maybe standing in heroic poses and saying some heroic lines would help!

*The rangers begin posing. Anyone within a reasonable distance of them (er…within sight of them) runs screaming in fear and unimaginable pain. This goes on for some time until a guy in a bad rubber suit appears along with a blast of astoundingly bad special effects.*

Red Ranger: Oh no! It's *Insert Stupid Bad Guy Name Here*!!!!

Blue Ranger: But we don't have our stunt doubles! Or a guy in a mecha suit and a bunch of tiny buildings! What are we to do?!

Pink Ranger: ...Why don't we just beat him up?

All: ...

Red Ranger: LET'S DO IT!

*All of the rangers charge at *Insert Stupid Bad Guy Name Here* with many completely pointless flips and somersaults, then proceed to beat the shit out of...it. While this is continuing (seen only as a dust cloud complete with the occasional colorful bodypart/mangled piece of monster costume) the Ginyu Force drops out of the sky.*

Jace: Who're these losers?

Berta: I have no idea. Wanna go bowling?

Guldo: But... I want to kill them!

Berta: Um... I'm pretty sure they're already dead. That would be why they're here.

Guldo: Oh. Are you sure?

Berta: Yes.

Guldo: Well...can I at least cause them a great deal of pain?

Berta: Sure.

Guldo: WHOHOO!

*Guldo fires an energy beam at the dust cloud that consist of the Power Rangers as well as the completely random evil minion that they're currently pound into oblivion. Of course, now all that's left is a smoking crater...*

Guldo: Um, boss, didn't you say they couldn't die?

Berta (sweatdropping): You...must have heard me wrong...I guess... Well, let's go bowling!

*Ginyu force flies off to a conveniently located bowling alley, and the screen shuts off and slides back up*

Anti-Conscience: Well that was anticlimactic. Anyway, despite the Power Rangers having been wiped off of the plane of existence, we still have to come up with a decision. May I have the envelope please?

Conscience: Naw yets!

Anti-Conscience: Why?

Conscience: I needs ta finish!

Anti-Conscience: Is it absolutely positively necessary?

Conscience: Um...Yesh?

Anti-Conscience: THAN GET ON WITH IT YOU NEANDERTHAL!

Conscience: Kay! Zenith... zephyr... zero... zest... zigzag... zinc... zip code... zipper... zirconium... zodiac... zone... zoo... zoological... zoology! Mesas all dones now!

Anti-Conscience: Weren't you looking for glomp?

Conscience (GIR voice): Oooooh yeeeeaaaaah...

Anti-Conscience: Did you find it?

Conscience (grinning insanely): NOPES!

Anti-Conscience: ...

Conscience: ^_^

Anti-Conscience: ...

Conscience: ^_^

Anti-Conscience: Give me the firking envelope.

Conscience (pulling out a badly worn envelope that looks like it's been buried at least one point in its existence): YIPPERS!

Anti-Conscience (taking the envelope): You know I gave this to you thirty seconds ago, right?

Conscience: Yesh!

Anti-Conscience: And you've been right here this entire time, right?

Conscience: Yesh!

Anti-Conscience: THAN HOW DID YOU MANAGE TO DESTROY IT IN THIRTY SECONDS WITHOUT MOVING FROM THAT SPOT?!

Conscience: Um…a ripsh in the space-times continimum?

Anti-Conscience: That's it, I'm never asking her anything ever again. *rips open the envelope* And the winner for Most Annoying Losers in the Home for Infinite Losers iiiis *drum roll* the Power Rangers! By being so wussy as to die after they were already dead, they managed to secure this honor! Unfortunately (and DON'T quote me on that), they no longer exist, so they can't receive this pretty trophy I made for them. *pulls out an enormous solid gold statue of a guy riding on a giant slug* As such, I've decided to donate to a worthy cause: my very own mecha! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!!

*Kimi runs in wielding something that looks suspiciously like Mace-sama*

Kimi (running around in circles and hitting seemingly random spots on the floor): I'll get you yet Kametachi!!!!

Anti-Conscience: I'd hate to interrupt this Kodak moment, but what in nine hells are you doing?

Kimi: I'm hunting Kametachi. Isn't it obvious?

Anti-Conscience: Kame-whaty?

Kimi: Kametachi, the invisible weasel.

Anti-Conscience: Oh. Tell ya what. I'm going to go over there and pretend that made sense.

Conscience (pointing excitedly at an empty spot on the wall): I sees it, I sees it!

*Kimi runs over and whacks the wall, causing massive damage*

Anti-Conscience: Oi, Kimi! While I'm asking pointless questions...What was up with the pun earlier?

Kimi (still glancing suspiciously around the room): Oh, that...

Anti-Conscience: Yeah, that.

Kimi: Sorry about that. I *whack* was *whack* just being influenced by *whack whack CRUNCH!* having seen to many badly dubbed anime. Don't worry, I'm back to *THWACK!* normal now.

Anti-Conscience (rolls eyes): Right... Well, that's it for this episode of anime arena! If there's another chapter, avoid it at all costs. Consider yourself warned.

Sorry about this taking so long (is there an actual award for understatement of the year? `Cus I really think I should get it for that… ^_^;), but it seems that even thinking about the Power Rangers brings down the curse of Writer's Block upon thee... Not a particularly helpful thing when one is trying to write a story. Hitomi told me (repetitively) that renting Shinesman might help...but I didn't. Oh well...