Digimon Fan Fiction ❯ BEST I AM ❯ Chapter 3

BEST I AM

 

Disclaimer: I don't own Digimon, its characters, nor any products or services mentioned in this fic.

 

Warnings: This will be mostly Yama/Dai/Keru but there will be other pairings, maybe. This fic will contain severe kiddy angst at the beginning as well as emotional abuse. The later chapters will be fluffier; I do not like writing non happy ending fics. Also contains multiple partners, incest, nongraphic NCS. I will add any new warnings as they come up.

 

This fic is AU, and takes place in an American setting, Northern California I think. There will be some OOCness, and I have played around with Yama's age he is now only a year older than TK and Dai. Matt and TK's parents are still together in this fic.

 

Italics=thoughts

~~~~~~~~ = scene and/or time change

 

Chapter 3

 

A nurse knocked politely on the office door and waited for an acknowledgement before entering and saying “Mr. and Mrs. Ishida if you would follow me please.”

Shintaro gave Miharu one final hug before grasping her hand and following the nurse through the hallways. After several minutes and an elevator ride later they arrived at the pediatrics wing and again meet the doctor outside of a door marked Ishida/Motomiya.

 

The doctor considered his words carefully before speaking “at this time the boys will not allow us to physically separate them at all. After they rediscover the feelings of safety and love they once knew, this need for constant physical contact will diminish and given enough time it will no longer be a necessity for the boys to feel comfortable. Also I am going to warn you; in cases of severe physical and sexual abuse, being around adults and especially physical contact with adults can cause distress. All three boys are showing signs of this so don't be upset if they do not want to be touched. Your sons will probably be okay seeing as how they know and love you, but young Daisuke doesn't and he may react badly. I have told the boys that you are coming to see them so they know to expect you. If Daisuke has a panic attack just back away somewhat and allow Yamato and Takeru to calm him down. Afterward it should be alright for you to approach them again; just try to give them space and do not hover over them, use the chairs provided to bring you down to their eye level. This will decrease their discomfort and allow you to talk to and reassure your sons that you still love them and that they have done nothing wrong. I realize that it may sound strange, but the boys will be feeling a lot of guilt and they won't know why. This is a body's natural reaction to psychological trauma and you will need to counter it often in the months ahead. Other than all of that, I'll simply advice you to try and not to make sudden movements or raise your voice. I promise you that everything will turn out alright eventually, it will just take time to heal these wounds, for they are not of the flesh but of the mind and soul.”¹

 

With that said he gently opened the door and made his way to a chair on the left-hand side of the large hospital bed that all three boys were occupying. “Takeru, Yamato your parents are here to see you” he said quietly.

 

Mrs. Ishida wanted nothing more than to run straight to her two boys, hold them and never let go. Instead with tears of joy, sadness, guilt, and anger running down her face she cautiously approached the right side of the bed, leaned down and pulled her Takeru into a firm hug and quietly said over and over “my poor baby, oh how I've missed you, mommy loves you, my poor baby.” Mr. Ishida was doing the same thing on the other side with Yamato. It was several minutes later that she noticed Takeru's trembling and the doctor's calm voice saying “please Mr. and Mrs. Ishida back off for a minute and allow the boys a chance to calm down.” She hesitantly released the death grip she had on her son and instead held onto his hand as she sat in the nearby chair. It was then that she noticed the third child in the bed between her two sons. She could not tell many details about him because he was currently huddled into a ball and shaking with fear. Yamato and Takeru were quietly whispering to him but it did not seem to be doing much good. She meet her husbands eyes over the bed and noticed the look in his eyes, she knew she probably had the same one in hers. Shintaro squeezed his older sons hand and said quietly “Yamato do what you have to do, we will still be here so take your time” he nodded his head in the direction of the little red-headed boy. The older boy gave a small nod before releasing the hand he still held. He then turned and curled around Daisuke running his fingers through his hair and continuing the soft reassurances he had already been giving. Takeru was doing the same thing on Daisuke's other side after he gave his mothers hand a gentle squeeze. The Ishidas watched as the little red-head first uncurled himself only to wrap his arms and legs tightly around Yamato. Behind him Takeru pulled himself closer and spooned in tightly against his back while wrapping his arms around Daisuke's waist. Soft whispers could be heard coming from the bed “its okay…our parents… safe now, Yamato promised… not leaving you…” The adults all watched in wonder as the red-head's trembling slowed and finally stopped even as his staggered panting calmed down into deep breaths. Within ten minutes the previously terrified boy was sound asleep. Takeru too had given in to his exhaustion and had fallen asleep. Yamato looked up at his mother without moving from his position and said “momma I missed you; I would give you a hug but I don't want to disturb Dai-kun.”

 

Miharu got up and eased her way around the bed. When she reached her older sons side she leaned down and placed a tender kiss against his temple as she ran her hand lovingly through his hair. Looking down she noticed that his eyes were closed in an attempt to stop the tears streaming down his face and the silent sobs that were slightly racking his body. “Oh sweetheart, its okay baby, mommy's here now…” she continued on as she held him as close as possible under the conditions. Soon the child in her arms quieted down, and he had ceased shaking. Opening her eyes and looking down she was surprised to see his eyes still open and staring across the bed at the other two sleeping boys. “You love them don't you Yama-chan?” she asked quietly.

 

“I don't know; everything's strange right now. What they made us do; I don't remember half of it, but I keep seeing them in my dreams; I can feel their hands on me. Those men I mean. Then just as the nightmare is about to get really bad the arms become comforting and the men disappear and its touto-chan and Dai-kun holding me, keeping me safe; just like I do for them.” Yamato gave his mother a worried look “I feel more strongly towards them than I do even for you and papa. I know I shouldn't be having these feelings yet and not for two other boys, one of whom is my own brother, but I can't help it” he finished saying and began crying again.

 

Miharu gave Shintaro a significant look which he read correctly and nodded his head in agreement. “Shush, calm down baby, it okay. You can't help how you feel; none of this is your fault. What has the doctor talked to you about concerning your condition?”

 

“Not much they mostly just asked a bunch of questions about what we had been made to do and how it made us feel; things like that. The doctor said that tomorrow we would have to talk to a psy… psich… what's the word?”

 

“A psychiatrist baby, they are people that you tell your problems to and then they help you find a solution.”

 

The doctor who had been listening to the conversation broke in at this point. “Doctor Silverton will be in here to see you boys in the morning. She is very good with children, and specializes in abuse cases. She will be able to help you deal with what was done to you three, but only if you open up and talk to her. And don't worry; she cannot repeat anything you say to her to anyone else, even your parents, if you don't give her permission to.”

 

Yamato considered this quietly before letting out a huge yawn.

 

“Are you sleepy son, why don't you try taking a nap?” the elder male Ishida said. “We will still be here when you wake up, promise.” Yamato merely nodded his head before closing his eyes. He was asleep within minutes. After watching the boys sleep for a few minutes Shintaro turned to the doctor and asked him for a favor “would you mind giving us some time alone so we can discuss our sons situation?”

 

“I have no problems with that; I need to see about some other patients anyway. Just try to avoid waking the boys and don't discuss anything to sensitive just in case one of them happens to wake up without your knowing it” the doctor said with a knowing smirk before walking out the door.

 

The couple gave each other small frowns before glancing at the bed then back at each other. Without a word spoken they stood up and moved to sit on the couch that was situated on the side of the room opposite of the door. Sitting beside each other they keep their heads close together and held a whispered conversation which mostly concerned their observations of the relationship their sons had developed with the little red-headed boy who was currently sheltered between their sons on the bed. They finally accepted the fact that their lives would now be completely different from what it was before their sons kidnapping. In view of their children's medical conditions and the fact that they would be home bound for what could be years to come; one of them would have to give up their career to stay home and watch over them. After a small argument, and an hours worth of discussion, they came to the agreement that Miharu would continue to work while Shintaro would stay home and home-school the three boys. Yes they also decided to go ahead and adopt Daisuke; after all they really had little choice. The main reasons for this arrangement was; first, Miharu's occupation brought home almost twice the income of Shintaro's; second, since Shintaro was already a teacher he would have a better time adjusting to the home school curriculum than his wife, a business executive, would; and third, having their father around fulltime would probably help the boys to feel safer both at home and when they eventually began venturing outside.

 

 

After coming to this decision they simply held each other and silently watched their children sleep. A short while later the doctor returned to the room and after ensuring that his three patients were doing well approached the couple. “I need to ask you what your plan is for tonight. My advice would be for both of you to go home and try to get a good nights sleep because once the boys are home you may not get another chance for a while. The other option is for one of you to spend the night on this couch so that you can be here when the boys have a nightmare or the like. Be aware that nurses will be in to check on the boys ever half hour and they will have each other to help keep each other calm which they are amazingly good at. They made it through last night with very little trouble. It seems that having them close together helps alleviate some of their anxiety. Be aware that even though the nurses try to be as quiet as possible it is very likely that if one of you decides to stay you will be woken up several times during the night. Sleep deprivation is not conducive to a calm, healthy state of mind which you will surely need in the days to come.”

 

“I think that if we had our way we would both stay with the boys tonight, but I realize that despite how strong the urge to do that is, it really won't help anybody in the long run. So although it goes against every parental instinct in me I think the best thing to do will be to leave our boys in your capable hands. It's just as well considering all the adjustment we will have to make at home to accommodate three convalescing boys. Oh yes, doctor can you direct us to the person we need to see about starting the paper work on adopting Daisuke? After observing the interaction between the boys this afternoon we decided to do what is best for all three boys and that is to keep them together.”

 

“Here is the card with the phone number that was given to me. Call in the morning and they will do their best to expedite the process.”

 

“We appreciate it doctor, is there anything else we can help you with?”

 

“No nothing that I can think of at the moment, why don't you take turns stretching your legs, getting something to eat or drink, that sort of thing until the boys wake up then you can let them know about the arrangements for tonight. Hopefully in a few days they will be able to return home, it depends on Dr. Silverton's opinion of their mental condition. It's likely that they will be allowed to go home soon seeing as how the familiar surrounding will help your sons reacclimatize to normal living, and they in turn will be able to help the Motomiya boy adjust.”

 

“Well that is good news. I'm sure you have other patients to attend to, should we let anyone know when the boys wake up or is it okay for us to spend some more time alone with them while their awake?”

 

“I'm bending the visitation rules for all the parents whose children were involved in this incident so yes you will be allowed to stay for a little while after normal visiting hours but not too long because even though the boys are asleep now they will need more rest later tonight.”

 

“Okay, we will talk to you later doc.” Shintaro said with a small wave as the doctor exited the room. Left in the silence of the small room the two worried parents tried to deal with their individual anxieties as best as they could while they waited for their own two children and their soon to be adopted son to wake up so they could begin the process of piecing their lives back together.

 

TBC…

 

I am not a psych-anything so I don't know if any of this is really true, but it sounds good to me, and I'm the one who counts.

 

A/N: Okay this ends what seems to be a three chapter prologue. The next several chapters will deviate from this setting. If anyone is even reading this fic just be patient the pace should pick up a little now that the background story has been laid out.