Digimon Fan Fiction ❯ Walking of the Edge of Friendship ❯ Chapter 14 ( Chapter 14 )
[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
By: Jun-chan 
Daisuke tries and fails to do something about his feelings, plus some good old fashioned Taito-y goodness. ^__^
Anime/Manga: Digimon Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Angst / Romance / Drama / Comedy | Type: Alternate Universe | Uploaded On: 03.14.2003 | Pages: 1 | Words: 1.5K | Visits: 323 | Status: Work In Progress
Daisuke tries and fails to do something about his feelings, plus some good old fashioned Taito-y goodness. ^__^
Anime/Manga: Digimon Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Angst / Romance / Drama / Comedy | Type: Alternate Universe | Uploaded On: 03.14.2003 | Pages: 1 | Words: 1.5K | Visits: 323 | Status: Work In Progress
A/N: See, I told you'd keep going. Chapter 14 is done, and I wrote it in about, oh, half an hour. It just came, ya know? Anyways, Daisuke's problems don't get resolved yet, but thats ok since this was mostly a taito chapter. Well, hope you all enjoy. ^___^
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Wh y didn't this occur to me before? When he kissed me the first time? It was like those feelings were blocked out. God, why do I always have to so damn blind to my feelings? Sometimes I think my mind blocks out everything I don't want to feel or face, and instead lets me see only what I want to see. I should have been able to tell long ago that my attraction to Ken was mostly sexual. Its almost like this part of me was looking for a non-emotion release...but it found Ken instead. Daisuke turned his attention away from his thoughts to where he was. He was very close to Takeru's apartment, to close to be without knowing what he was going to say. I don't even know what I want to say at all. I don't even know what it is I'm feeling, or why. I just feel like I need to see him.
"Daisuke?"
Daisuke straigten up to see Takeru hurrying towards him from the opposite direction. He took the long way home..
"Takeru," Daisuke turned his head to side, knowing he must be turning red, partly from the chill of the summer night and partly from embarassment. "I-I thought you'd be home by now.."
"And I thought you were with Ken."
"I.." Daisuke faltered. I guess I have no choice but to tell him what happened. "I was."
"You weren't with him for very long," Takeru's expression turned slightly concerned. "Did something happen?"
Daisuke still couldn't look him in the face. He wasn't even sure why he had come here now. He had no idea what to say, and Takeru's concerned expression wasn't helping him feel any better. Takeru moved closer to him, and was right up in his face before Daisuke even noticed he had moved.
"Daisuke..?"
"Ah-"
"Are you-"
He was cute off by Daisuke's lips pushing on his with much more force than Takeru remembered him using earlier. Daisuke broke the kiss as suddenly as he had begun it, looking at Takeru quickly, embarassedly, before turning away.
"Daisuke," Takeru moved to touch him, put his hand on his shoulder or grab his arm, but Daisuke moved away.
"Takeru," he turned his head to look at Takeru, his expression quite unreadable, but deffinately one of pain. "I.." he turned around competely. "God, I don't know what I'm doing! Everything I do feels wrong...why can't I just make up my damn mind?!"
Takeru listend to him, his shock not subtle, but his concern growing. "Tell me what happened, Daisuke, please tell me.."
"I realized that I'm a fool, Takeru," Daisuke looked at him honestly, but couldn't hide the troubles that were pushing their way to the surface. "I'm sorry..God, I shouldn't have come here!"
Daisuke turned and began to run. Takeru attempted to touch him, control him, once more, but again he failed. Instead of getting the clarification he'd asked for, he instead was given more confusion.
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It took forever to get the bike in the rack at Yamato's complex. But Taichi hardly cared, nothing was going to anger him today, his mood was too good. He ran up the three flights of stairs to Yamato's apartment, and knocked rather hastily when he got to Yamato's door. Yamato looked rather ruffled when he answered it, like he was greeting someone he didn't particularly like. Taichi didn't really notice it much, he only noticed that it was Yamato. He made to grab for Yamato, but Yamato slid away, and then glared at him.
"Yamato..?"
Yamato slapped him accross the face. Taichi stared at him stunned, to stunned to even cry, or speak. Yamato turned and walked into the apartment, settling himself on the couch. He sprawled across it, making it impossible for Taichi to sit near him. Or at least that was the idea. Taichi smiled to himself and one-upped Yamato. He sat on him.
"Just what the hell," Yamato sent him a truly icey glare. "Do you think you're doing?"
"Whats it look like? If you won't let me sit next to you, then I'll just sit on you instead. I'm not going to play games."
Yamato sent him an angry look, then turned away and sighed. If you don't want things to be this way, why are you pushing so hard to do just that? Taichi looked over at Yamato's face, which was having a hard time keeping the angry look on it. He looks..almost sad. Like..he's hurt but is too stubborn to admit it. And its my fault, I know it is. He reached a hand over, down to Yamato's neck, touching it softly. Yamato recoiled from the touch, though it seemed to be a very forced action to Taichi.
"Yamato..."
Yamato didn't look at him. Taichi took his hand away, and slid off the couch to the floor. He moved to a sitting position in front of Yamato's face. He leaned on the couch, arms folded under his chin. Yamato stared at him, then averted his gaze. God, I feel like we're 11 all over again. He hasn't acted like this since then. Taichi absentmindedly touched Yamato's face, stroking the smooth cheek as Yamato tried his best to ignore him. At least he isn't pulling away this time. Taichi raised himself so that his face was level with Yamato's.
"Are you going to say anything or do I have to force you to talk?"
Yamato ignored him. Taichi sighed in defeat. Fine, then. We'll do this my way. He stopped stroking Yamato's cheek. Yamato noticed; Taichi saw him struggle not to look at him, not to ask him why he'd stopped. Taichi tilted his head so that his face matched up nearly perfectly with Yamato's, and moved closer to him. He kept moving closer until their faces met, forhead to forhead, but not so close that they were kissing. Yamato's gaze finally fell on him, and Taichi saw for the first time how truly hurt he was. It nearly caused him to move back and away, but he controled himself and looked at Yamato evenly.
"Please," he whispered, nearly pleaded. "Please don't do this to yourself. Its hurting me more to see you like this than it is to be ignored."
Yamato blinked, and gulped, obviously forcing himself not to cry. He reach a hand to Taichi's face, barely touching the spot where his ear met his neck before letting it rest on his cheek. He stared at Taichi, though this time not an incriminating gaze; he was scared.
"Yamato..Why didn't you just say you were scared?" Taichi whispered, looking at him, more concerned for Yamato than himself now.
Yamato gulped again, though his eyes were full of tears. "I..I don't know.."
Yamato closed his eyes tightly, still forcing himself not to cry. Taichi forced him to open them when he brushed away the tears that were threatening to fall, eyes closed or not. "What are you even scared of?"
Yamato opened his mouth to speak, paused, and then tried again. "I-I guess..the thought of you being angry at me for doing..what I did the other day..I felt so..I guess rejected.."
"You weren't listening to me at all, were you?"
"I-what?"
"If you had been, you would have noticed my failed attempts at trying to explain," Taichi chuckled, and then moved his face a little closer. "I wasn't mad about you actually doing that, I was mad at the whole situation."
Yamato blinked. "I gues..I guess I should be appologizing, then.."
"You don't need to," Taichi smiled. Yamato looked at him, still scared, but not as much as he had been. "But I'm curious.."
"About what?"
"You didn't seem mad when you called earlier.."
"I wasn't."
Taichi nearly fell over at that. "Then why..?"
"I don't know..something just..came over me. I felt like maybe I'd forgiven you too soon maybe.."
Taichi moved his face closer to Yamato's still; now their noses were touching and their lips were so close they could feel each other's breath. "Please, don't apologize. That isn't what I want."
"Then what do you want?"
Taichi didn't answer, just smiled. Then, before Yamato could react, he closed the gap between them, kissing him slowly and carefully, like it was something that should be treasured and not rushed. Yamato nearly pulled away before he realized what Taichi was actually doing. I guess this is his way of saying he forgives me. Or maybe..'I'm sorry too'? I don't care..
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A/N: Yep, thats a wrap. Next chapter probably won't have any taito. But the Daisuke/Ken/Takeru thing gets more interesting. I don't want to give it away, but I'll tell you this much: its about to become a fully formed triangle...
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Wh y didn't this occur to me before? When he kissed me the first time? It was like those feelings were blocked out. God, why do I always have to so damn blind to my feelings? Sometimes I think my mind blocks out everything I don't want to feel or face, and instead lets me see only what I want to see. I should have been able to tell long ago that my attraction to Ken was mostly sexual. Its almost like this part of me was looking for a non-emotion release...but it found Ken instead. Daisuke turned his attention away from his thoughts to where he was. He was very close to Takeru's apartment, to close to be without knowing what he was going to say. I don't even know what I want to say at all. I don't even know what it is I'm feeling, or why. I just feel like I need to see him.
"Daisuke?"
Daisuke straigten up to see Takeru hurrying towards him from the opposite direction. He took the long way home..
"Takeru," Daisuke turned his head to side, knowing he must be turning red, partly from the chill of the summer night and partly from embarassment. "I-I thought you'd be home by now.."
"And I thought you were with Ken."
"I.." Daisuke faltered. I guess I have no choice but to tell him what happened. "I was."
"You weren't with him for very long," Takeru's expression turned slightly concerned. "Did something happen?"
Daisuke still couldn't look him in the face. He wasn't even sure why he had come here now. He had no idea what to say, and Takeru's concerned expression wasn't helping him feel any better. Takeru moved closer to him, and was right up in his face before Daisuke even noticed he had moved.
"Daisuke..?"
"Ah-"
"Are you-"
He was cute off by Daisuke's lips pushing on his with much more force than Takeru remembered him using earlier. Daisuke broke the kiss as suddenly as he had begun it, looking at Takeru quickly, embarassedly, before turning away.
"Daisuke," Takeru moved to touch him, put his hand on his shoulder or grab his arm, but Daisuke moved away.
"Takeru," he turned his head to look at Takeru, his expression quite unreadable, but deffinately one of pain. "I.." he turned around competely. "God, I don't know what I'm doing! Everything I do feels wrong...why can't I just make up my damn mind?!"
Takeru listend to him, his shock not subtle, but his concern growing. "Tell me what happened, Daisuke, please tell me.."
"I realized that I'm a fool, Takeru," Daisuke looked at him honestly, but couldn't hide the troubles that were pushing their way to the surface. "I'm sorry..God, I shouldn't have come here!"
Daisuke turned and began to run. Takeru attempted to touch him, control him, once more, but again he failed. Instead of getting the clarification he'd asked for, he instead was given more confusion.
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It took forever to get the bike in the rack at Yamato's complex. But Taichi hardly cared, nothing was going to anger him today, his mood was too good. He ran up the three flights of stairs to Yamato's apartment, and knocked rather hastily when he got to Yamato's door. Yamato looked rather ruffled when he answered it, like he was greeting someone he didn't particularly like. Taichi didn't really notice it much, he only noticed that it was Yamato. He made to grab for Yamato, but Yamato slid away, and then glared at him.
"Yamato..?"
Yamato slapped him accross the face. Taichi stared at him stunned, to stunned to even cry, or speak. Yamato turned and walked into the apartment, settling himself on the couch. He sprawled across it, making it impossible for Taichi to sit near him. Or at least that was the idea. Taichi smiled to himself and one-upped Yamato. He sat on him.
"Just what the hell," Yamato sent him a truly icey glare. "Do you think you're doing?"
"Whats it look like? If you won't let me sit next to you, then I'll just sit on you instead. I'm not going to play games."
Yamato sent him an angry look, then turned away and sighed. If you don't want things to be this way, why are you pushing so hard to do just that? Taichi looked over at Yamato's face, which was having a hard time keeping the angry look on it. He looks..almost sad. Like..he's hurt but is too stubborn to admit it. And its my fault, I know it is. He reached a hand over, down to Yamato's neck, touching it softly. Yamato recoiled from the touch, though it seemed to be a very forced action to Taichi.
"Yamato..."
Yamato didn't look at him. Taichi took his hand away, and slid off the couch to the floor. He moved to a sitting position in front of Yamato's face. He leaned on the couch, arms folded under his chin. Yamato stared at him, then averted his gaze. God, I feel like we're 11 all over again. He hasn't acted like this since then. Taichi absentmindedly touched Yamato's face, stroking the smooth cheek as Yamato tried his best to ignore him. At least he isn't pulling away this time. Taichi raised himself so that his face was level with Yamato's.
"Are you going to say anything or do I have to force you to talk?"
Yamato ignored him. Taichi sighed in defeat. Fine, then. We'll do this my way. He stopped stroking Yamato's cheek. Yamato noticed; Taichi saw him struggle not to look at him, not to ask him why he'd stopped. Taichi tilted his head so that his face matched up nearly perfectly with Yamato's, and moved closer to him. He kept moving closer until their faces met, forhead to forhead, but not so close that they were kissing. Yamato's gaze finally fell on him, and Taichi saw for the first time how truly hurt he was. It nearly caused him to move back and away, but he controled himself and looked at Yamato evenly.
"Please," he whispered, nearly pleaded. "Please don't do this to yourself. Its hurting me more to see you like this than it is to be ignored."
Yamato blinked, and gulped, obviously forcing himself not to cry. He reach a hand to Taichi's face, barely touching the spot where his ear met his neck before letting it rest on his cheek. He stared at Taichi, though this time not an incriminating gaze; he was scared.
"Yamato..Why didn't you just say you were scared?" Taichi whispered, looking at him, more concerned for Yamato than himself now.
Yamato gulped again, though his eyes were full of tears. "I..I don't know.."
Yamato closed his eyes tightly, still forcing himself not to cry. Taichi forced him to open them when he brushed away the tears that were threatening to fall, eyes closed or not. "What are you even scared of?"
Yamato opened his mouth to speak, paused, and then tried again. "I-I guess..the thought of you being angry at me for doing..what I did the other day..I felt so..I guess rejected.."
"You weren't listening to me at all, were you?"
"I-what?"
"If you had been, you would have noticed my failed attempts at trying to explain," Taichi chuckled, and then moved his face a little closer. "I wasn't mad about you actually doing that, I was mad at the whole situation."
Yamato blinked. "I gues..I guess I should be appologizing, then.."
"You don't need to," Taichi smiled. Yamato looked at him, still scared, but not as much as he had been. "But I'm curious.."
"About what?"
"You didn't seem mad when you called earlier.."
"I wasn't."
Taichi nearly fell over at that. "Then why..?"
"I don't know..something just..came over me. I felt like maybe I'd forgiven you too soon maybe.."
Taichi moved his face closer to Yamato's still; now their noses were touching and their lips were so close they could feel each other's breath. "Please, don't apologize. That isn't what I want."
"Then what do you want?"
Taichi didn't answer, just smiled. Then, before Yamato could react, he closed the gap between them, kissing him slowly and carefully, like it was something that should be treasured and not rushed. Yamato nearly pulled away before he realized what Taichi was actually doing. I guess this is his way of saying he forgives me. Or maybe..'I'm sorry too'? I don't care..
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A/N: Yep, thats a wrap. Next chapter probably won't have any taito. But the Daisuke/Ken/Takeru thing gets more interesting. I don't want to give it away, but I'll tell you this much: its about to become a fully formed triangle...