Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction ❯ Finding Peace ❯ My Own ( Chapter 53 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

~~~~~~~~~`````` Chapter My Own

I am, My own
And that's something to me
I've grown, Too strong
To be under your feet

See the hands
That try to hold me
Read the past
I never was free

Deeds of shame
The world around me
Know my pain
The world that I see --Soil


~~~~~~~```````~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~``````````````````~~~~~~~~~~~

Why can't he ever be angry? Why can't he ever just say things he doesn't mean and care not for the consequences? He used to be able too. He used to not care. What had changed? Why is she any different from the others? She is human. She is weak. She is insignificant. She always had been. So why couldn't he say what he wanted and turn his back upon her tears?


It wasn't always like this. When he was younger, and there were no kids, and there was no marriage, she was just a piece of trash in his harsh view. Given she had her curves and her awkward color, but she was still not what he thought he deserved. When had it switched? When had her tears begun to affect him?


It had been after she bore his first heir. Bulma had gained his respect when she stood strong before him with the child held protectively in her grasp staring at him with glistening, raging slits. She was now the mother of his child. And that's when it all started to matter. She had given him a purpose. True, an unwanted purpose but one nonetheless.


Vegeta sighed from his balanced position on the balcony railing. His knee brought to his chest for his chin to rest on. He didn't care for the time but from the location of the moon it was at least two in the morning. His two kids were over Trunks' house, which relieved him some. He didn't want the two to be here with the fighting that will surely commence again soon.


No matter her words, he still believed in his own. The woman had taken a part from his heart and shaped it to her liking. Weather she believes it or not that is what she had done. And it is unforgivable.


His pride was been beaten to shreds. How shameful his father's expression would be if he saw him now. Vegeta did not even want to think about his death for when finally that sweet release greeted him, he would spend a lifetime in hell with his father and the whole rest of his race. What would they say when they see him? What would they think? Vegeta wondered of it constantly, being dead, being able to be with his race once again. Would that in itself be a frightful experience?


He was drifting again. Back to the matter at hand. When he had agreed to the doctors he was doing it for her. When he had agreed to the medications it had been for his brats. But when he had agreed to the tests, he had lost all of his reasoning. Getting poked, touched, crowded around was the final straw to his fading patience. He had been doing so many things for his family and nothing for himself. This Prince of selfishness that would snub any servant that crossed his path, now was thinking of other beings beside himself. He realized then none of him was the same. Not the way he viewed life. Not the way he saw his kids. Not even the way he perceived his mate. She was different in his present eyes.


Fighting did not even have the same vigor. It didn't bring the pleasurable adrenaline of power to his veins. And that had scared him above all else. Strength had been his life, his Sayian nature, and now it meant nothing?! Impossible!


Did the woman at all understand what he had said to her? Did she get it? His past is what made him who he was, how is she wanting him to forget that? Sure, some things should be left behind but certainly not everything. With these pills that she has been feeding him, he can't even remember things such as the first time he saw her on planet Namek. It was fuzzy when thought upon. Everything in his memory was blurry. She must know this. For a Sayian, memory starts at the day they were born. Every Sayian knows everyday and the only way to forget is to control yourself to forget but at any moment, if you want, you can just bring the memory back again in a few seconds. But she knew this. And yet she drugged him to forget everything.


Part of him was grateful. He worshipped the fact that Frieza was no longer in his eyes. He loved the fact that he couldn't view his mother's murder, or his first rape. But then again, he loathed the reality that he couldn't see his mother's eyes. He knew the color, he knew the way she looked but he couldn't see her. And that is what caused pain with each passing day.


Maybe she doesn't know it. He never tells her anything. Unless she asks. She has not asked. So she must not know. Vegeta sighed, his eyes snapping over to the meowing cat standing in the doorway of his balcony. He huffed though knowing the cat wanted his attention. He hated the thing. It was furry and soft and always in need to be pet. The thing that bothered him the worst is that it purred. Bra had showed him that one day. "Look Daddy he purrs just like you." Great. That's all he needs. His species to be referred to cats. Fluffy, tiny creatures that meow in distress. Frightening.


He stood, reaching to grab it by the extra skin upon it's neck, instinctively it curled into a tight ball, still meowing however. He placed it upon his shoulder letting it lay there while he stepped into the air-conditioned house, closing the door behind him. His brows knit at the lighting, black eyes quickly scanning only to widened at the sight. Candles suffered from their overuse of power, light dwindling upon their lost visage of strength. It appeared they had been lit hours ago, placed around the room. His eyes followed the path of red rose pedals that led to the navy sheets of the bed, splattered all over it. Vegeta found a navy, silk robe hanging next to his hand-crafted sword. His view then fell to the nightstand where a box of chocolates laid along with a can of whip cream and a bucket once full of ice now melted, holding champagne as well as glasses standing next to it.


Vegeta sighed through his nose. This was their first night without any worries of kids since, hell Vegeta couldn't even remember the last time. They have yet to embrace this bed with their mating and it is proven she had wanted it to be tonight.


He shook his head, glancing at the staring cat upon his shoulder. "What?" He gruffed roughly, only getting the whimper of a meow in response. "No one asked you." Vegeta angrily bit back, grabbing the now annoying cat from his person and tossing him upon his bed. He stomped to his bathroom, taking off his shirt in the process only to stall once again when his eyes beheld the filled tub mixed with floating rose petals and faded bubbles. Incense had once smoked here, that he could smell and see but they had long ago burned out. Vegeta threw his shirt to the floor, ignoring it and slamming the door to the shower.


Finished dressing in his new silk pajama pants, he headed to the second level for a mid-night snake, only to find when his feet touched the floor the lights lit to illuminate the textures of a table full of all kinds of food. From chicken, to pig meat, to mashed potatoes, the woman had either ordered or made all of his favorites. He wouldn't know until he tasted it, but that would be going against his pride. Beside it was freezing to the touch, and he didn't feel like warming it up. He continued to the refrigerator, yanking it open in his frustration only to growl violently out loud upon seeing twelve boxes of multiple choices of dessert however all having one content the same. Chocolate.


He slammed the door, having had enough, and flew up to the next level and down the hall to their bedroom, letting the door slam upon the wall, waking the woman with a start. "I meant what I said. Weather you knew it or not, you have taken a part of who I am." He bit caring not for her insulted expression while she stood from bed, holding her robe tight around her.


Bulma who had all evening alone to cry to herself in her bed, caring not for all the things that she had before the argument set up, was now full of anger from his harsh and unjust words. She glared back in his callous eyes, tightening her arms before her chest. "And just how the hell did I manage that!"


"What do you think those drugs would do, woman! Do you honestly think that they target only one type of memory?"


"What do you mean?"


"What I mean, woman, is that I cannot remember anything." Vegeta growled low, needing her to understand just how severe this was for him.


Bulma's brows knit. "Anything?"


"Nothing. I know everything but yet I see nothing."


"Example, I don't understand."


His breath came in a heavy sigh, biting hard upon his teeth, "I know my past, and yet I cannot see it."


"And why is that bad?"


Vegeta instantly fumed at her ignorance, "I know the color of my mother's eyes, yet I see nothing! These drugs do not just take away the bad parts of my memory, but they also steal away memories I will always want." Vegeta paused still seeing the haziness of misconception in her eyes. He stepped to her, getting her full attention at his close person, her eyes closing when his fingers touched her mark upon her neck, emitting a moan from her lips. "I know how this got here, and yet I see nothing when I think of it."


"I get it, Vegeta. But why do you need to see it? Why does it matter?"


"It is mine, Onna. It is my past. And you have ripped it from me. I want my past."


"So you want to stop the medication? Is that what you are telling me?"


"I have tasted the bliss of ignorance, Onna. I have slept through entire nights without one flashback of my aggressor and of my own tortures. And that I want. But if I need to pick between never having memories of Frieza, of the things I have done, and of my race, of my mother, of my father, of you. I will never take another pill."


"So you would rather suffer sleepless nights then never seeing any of them again?" He nodded. She dropped her head from view, her hair covering her face but Vegeta was quick to grasp her chin in his fingers and lifted her eyes to his again. "It will be worse when you stop. You know that." The tears were not of pity but of sorrow and they affected him far worse then he ever wanted it too.


"For a while. Until I get control again. I will go away." He wiped the wetness from her cheeks with her thumbs, his brows knitting, "Why do you do such?"


"You will be in pain again. I thought that if you did this, and felt some sort of joy of not having to see Frieza every single time you closed your eyes, you would not care of your past anymore."


"Then you were a fool. Onna if you had one memory you wished to expel and used pills to do it, knowing that they would in effect destroy all of your other memories such as the boy, Bra, me, you would still do it, is that what you are telling me?"


"No, of course not."


"Then what makes you think I want that? My past that haunts me was long ago. You and the brats are now included in my past."


"But you don't need to remember us because we are still here."


"Then why would you not do it?" He saw the confusion in her eyes as she realized for herself her contradicting statement.


Bulma sighed nodding at his words. She drifted for a moment then speaking, "This can't be all that you are mad at. You attacked me before for another reason. What is it that you don't recognize about yourself?" The question hit him off guard but she gripped his hand so he would not pull back. "Tell me."


Vegeta shoved his eyes to the side wanting right now to leave this pitiful house and find some secluded island to blow up but her hand kept him at bay like she knew it would. "My memory is who I am. Taking it away changed my outlook."


"Meaning?" She nudged, smiling softly, leaning in, "You were actually being tolerable and bearable to be around? You were actually caring about someone other then yourself? Or could it be that you were all together just being nice?"


"The exact opposite of me." He spat though not oblivious to her playful ways. He was not as angry as before but it still lay dormant beneath.


"But other then that, Vegeta," She wrapped her arms around his waist, holding him close while his hands draped at his sides, still unrelenting to let her seduce him into a pleasant mood. "You're still an ass. You're arrogant, pig-headed, a chauvinist. You're brutal when it comes to our verbal fights. You're powerful. You're gorgeous. Really what is it that has changed? So you are actually talking to me every once and while, and you've shown you actually care about your family, but nothing altering. You're still you. You're still infuriating. And yes, Vegeta, you are still the man I fell in love with all those years ago." She leaned in and kissed him passionately on his lips, sighing when he responded with the same. His hands rose up her arms, gripping tight around her shoulders, pulling her closer, roughly to him. But soon their kiss came to a quick end and Bulma lingered away, smiling softly at his tough exterior but finding the softness in his black depths. "No matter how you change, Vegeta I will always love you. And I know I haven't said that in awhile and I guess that's what caused you to question. But I won't ever stop. Do you understand?"


"I'm not an idiot." He replied with his usual prideful smirk.


Bulma giggled, kissing his lips chastely, "Now that is still in question." The growl rumbled both of their chests from being so intimately close. She glanced behind her, finding the cloak and wickedly brought her eyes upon him. "It's still early. Did you find my surprises?" He nodded. "I didn't think you were going to blow up at me. I was going in there to issue a white flag but you ruined it like you always do. But as I said, it's still early." Bulma squealed when he flipped her over his shoulder and laughed at the sight of his butt in her face, her small fists pounding in his back to be demanded to let go.


He did let her go however only after several steps into the other room, nearly slamming her on the bed, and quickly crawling on top of her. He hadn't tasted her flesh in four days, and never once had he taken her on this bed. Vegeta would take his patience with tonight, knowing however that this would more then likely be the last night of mating for weeks to come.

~~`````

How the hell did he ever get himself into this mess? Vegeta scowled at the people smiling back as he continued to follow his wife stubbornly into the restaurant. The view however pleasant, her red behind swaying in her seductive steps, did nothing really to ease his temperament. He remembered no words spoke last night that had to deal with this dinner, no matter what she thought she heard. He would never have said 'yes' regardless of what positions he had been in last night. And he had been in many. But she was able to imagine this very conversation last night while in bed, and in present made it real. So now he was stuck to have dinner with his mate and a snob couple that had shunned his daughter-in-law.


He took his seat with a huff, trying to ignore the flashes of cameras by the press that had somehow smuggled their way in. Bulma was quick however getting them to disperse by telling the manager if he did not have them out within two minutes she was going to shut this place down. She smirked at him now, obviously proud of her devious accomplishment. "Oh stop pouting. They are the parents of our daughter-in-law we should have met with them months ago before the wedding." It was quiet after she made this comment, Vegeta obviously having nothing to respond but she was quick to ease his temper by ordering him a quick snack which he snobbishly but immediately dug into. "What do you think they will be like?" She question though knowing she would never receive an answer just by the look he returned. "They'll hate us instantly, I just know it. I mean they must have read newspapers before. And we're all over that. I can only imagine what we're like in their eyes. Devil-worshippers I'd imagine." Bulma giggled taking a quick sip of her wine.


Her eyes darted around in boredom. Finding no one she knew however meeting the eye of every male in the restaurant, their wives snapping their fingers before their eyes, some smacking them across the head, getting their attention rather quickly. She giggled at this, blushing in embarrassment. But Vegeta was not blind in this instant. "You keep that up I will kill every male in this building." He whispered menacingly, darting his glares around the room, scaring more then not all of the men out of their daydreams.


"Can I help it if they all find me so irresistible?"


"Yes. By not wearing such reveal attire. Put your sweater back on. You're about to fall out." Bulma glanced down only to find her bosom in closely tight quarters.


She glared at him but before she could say some sarcastic remark in return, a woman turned the corner and was now strutting toward them behind her husband. Bulma's eyes widened at the sight, "You think I'm about to fall out, take a look at that bimbo six o'clock." Vegeta turned his head round just when the female walked on by. Twice the size of his woman, she was, wearing a blue dress that pulled tighter on every curve. The straps that held her double e in place had to only be the size of her nipple, allowing the massive chucks to be wiggle free. She winked upon meeting his eyes but swayed past them to sit behind Bulma. The blue-haired female chocked on her wine, "She did not just do that." Bulma scowled going to move to her feet but Vegeta caught her wrist.


"Sit down, woman." However his Sayian instinct sincerely wished to let her do just what she wanted. Nothing like getting him aroused with such a sight. But he couldn't likely take the woman in this restaurant with so many people around and plus the couple that would soon be here would not appreciate the wait.


"She just fucking winked at you!" She said in a harsh, hushed tone.


"Leave it be. You cause enough eyes upon us all ready. Do not extract more attention."


"I should have had this place empty tonight! Why these people wanted this I have no clue! They did this on purpose."


"You keep talking woman, and I might think you are jealous." He smirked, sitting back in his chair smugly, crossing his arms over his chest.


Bulma huffed, "As if. You were the one before talking of killing everyone in here so I wouldn't be saying anything, troll."


"Witch."


"Bite me."


He chuckled, "Too late."


"Good one." Sarcasm always ate at him. Bulma huffed with a victorious smirk, "I'm going to the restroom."


Vegeta now alone, did nothing but sit with a pout, eyes darting around the room, finding a few stray eyes of females glance over to him before quickly turning away embarrassed. He smirked just lightly. It sure was fun to get out in the public every now and then among the commoners. It refreshed his pride.


"Hey, handsome." Vegeta snapped his eyes forward to find that female now staring at him seductively, licking her plump cherry lips before taking a tiny sip of her champagne. "Does your name just happened to be Vegeta?" She questioned raising her black brows while swinging her long blond hair over her shoulder to let him catch view of her perfectly tanned breast that hung over the chair. Vegeta raised an eyebrow of his own however nodding, wanting to see just how far this female was willing to go when his mate was still in the building. She smile brightened and she jumped from her chair, Vegeta wouldn't have been any man if he didn't notice the way her bosom wiggled at every movement. She came over to him, "I'm Mastao. I saw you at the tournament a few years back. And I always wanted to meet you." She leaned down, Vegeta watched her with a suspicious eye for her over large body parts were now in his protective bubble and hung just a few inches from his face. "I would all but cherish it if I could have your signature. Coming across such talk about warriors such as yourself really just makes my day." Vegeta smirked inwardly, continuing his stare at the woman's brown eyes while he reached for the pen she held in his grasp.


"And where would you like it?" He deviously asked, allowing his accent to slip in, watching as she shivered against his stroking tone.


Her hand grasped his and she lifted it to the top of her breast, however making his fingers dash across her erected nipple. Vegeta tried his best to keep his laughter at bay, but a humorous smile managed to weasel its way upon his lips. Where was that woman! She should be back by now! How he wished she could see this. "Yeah, right there." She whimpered, puffing her chest out all the more.


Vegeta wrote his name as slow and seductively as possible getting the most fun out of this entertaining whore. It was such a shame his mate was not here to enjoy this with him.


He spoke too soon, "Vegeta." Her voice rang and stalling in his writing he glanced over to the woman, who stood not ten feet away with arms crossed, foot tapping and a frown on her lips that promised many painful screaming later. His eyes though soon left hers to find two people standing shock still behind her, their mouths and eyes wide open. Don't tell him those are the.... "Vegeta," She spoke through clenched teeth though her voice tried to be as calm as possible, "I'd like you to meet Mr. And Mrs. Juno. Mr. And Mrs. Juno this is my husband, Vegeta. And this is...." She inquired with a raised brow snapping her eyes to the now frightened female.


"Mastao." She shakingly answered.


"Hi Mastao. It's nice to meet you. I'm Bulma Briefs, perhaps you've heard of me?" She dumbly nodded. "Oh good." The fake pleasant smile on her lips quickly faded. "Is there a reason my husband is signing your, um...body?"


"Ye...Yes. Ma'am...I. I. Wan..wanted.."


"Don't have all day here Miss Mastao. I'm a very busy woman. Why don't you just scamper off to a corner somewhere and find some unmarried bastard to rape you?" Her smile once again present watching the female visibly shake at her harsh words. She nodded frightened before quickly running out of the room. Bulma's smile dropped again once she brought her eyes on her husband. He dropped the pen on the table however she was not blind to the fact of the humor in his eyes and smirk on his lips. She whispered for only him to hear, "I'll deal with you later." His smirk only broadened. Bulma turned to her all too quiet guests, "Why don't we sit down?"