Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction ❯ Finding Peace ❯ You're Not Alone ( Chapter 66 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

~~~`` Chapter You’re Never Alone

All your life
You told yourself you were never alone
All your time
Spent on the problems that have no solution
In your mind
Giving up was never an option
Out of spite
Hold onto the hate that has helped you stay focused

Hatebreed


Vegeta stared out the window looking down over the city of Tokyo. Cars flew by, on there ways someplace. It didn’t really matter, he just wanted to pay attention to something other then the man staring at him in the chair. “I’m glad to hear that Bra is talking to you again. I think maybe some of your depression will fade from it.”


“I do not understand that word, ‘depression.’” Vegeta growled though not noticeably. He was just annoyed at himself for his lack of knowledge in the human vocabulary.


“A sadness that won’t go away. No matter how happy you are there is still an underlining pain, depression, that you can’t get rid of.” Vegeta nodded in his comprehension. The doctor continued on. “It’s been a month since your son left. How are you doing with that?”


“How am I suppose to deal with that? It is not a big deal.”


“Okay, how about your wife? How is she handling it?”


“She whines too much.”


“But you understand why. Still she hasn’t gotten used to it?”


“The woman is handling it. Better then before.”


“Good. All right. Let’s start.” Vegeta turned to lean against the wall with crossed arms, his body now cast in dark shadows. “The first time you raped, haunts you. I know this because you won’t speak of it. Have you thought about what I said?” Vegeta nodded. “So how about talking about it?” He shook his head, his black eyes quickly looking toward the windows. “Okay. I tried. Do you remember the second time you raped?” Nine wrote down his patient’s expression so forlorn, and out in space.


“Young. Just a child.”


“How old were you?” Dr. Nine stood swiftly when Vegeta leaned over and gripped his head tight in his hands. The prince fell to his knees, breathing heavily. Nine went near but Vegeta held his hand up to stop him. Soon both hands faded away. He wiped his brow, using the couch to help him stand. “Vegeta--”


“thirteen, still.” The black eyes of power told Nine to back-off and with much distaste, he obeyed sitting back in his chair.


“Still? The same age as your first?”


Vegeta nodded. “I was on planet Ezra. Radditz, Nappa, and I had just destroyed half of the population. The other half were taken as prisoners. Frieza had just sent a transmission. He wasn’t happy with how long it had taken us. It only had taken four hours. The normal but he was not satisfied. We would be punished when we returned. I left, needing to blow something up, for I knew I could not fight Frieza. No matter my last beating in the Cell, I was not strong enough. I found her, hiding underneath a destroyed spaceship.”


Nine saw the young man stall, but new the following words, “So you took her, to relieve your anger.” Vegeta nodded.


It was quiet for a few minutes before Vegeta whispered. “Silas.”


“Her name.”


“She was just a child.” He stalled for a moment, pushing himself off the wall and once again gazing out the window. “She had no mouth to speak. Their race did not use speech but there hands. Much like your deaf on this planet. Her eyes were purple. No hair anywhere. Skin felt as silk.” The doctor saw a sudden change. Vegeta became stiffer and fazed into the pain of his flashback. “She found a broken piece of glass. And before I could do one thing to stop her, she sliced her neck. Blood…sprayed everywhere.”


“Gods…Vegeta.” Nine knew his mistake. Never give pity to the Sayian Prince. He quickly tried to recover, “Ever think she was better off? What kind of life waited for her if you would have taken her back?”


“I wouldn’t have taken her there. I would have killed her.” Vegeta jumped out the window before another word could be said.

~~~```

Coming home that night, Vegeta searched for everyone’s ki. Bra was asleep in her bed, no one else was on campus, and Bulma was downstairs in the kitchen. He dropped to the second floor, typing in the password to the alarm system and entering. His little woman sat at the island bar, alone in the dark. He frowned. Her ki was extremely low. Vegeta went up behind her quietly going to the fridge and pulling out a bottle of water, then flipping the side light on so only a little light showed in the kitchen. He turned taking a gulp of water however stalling at the sight of her.


Her eyes so blank, tears dried streaked down her face, a glass shot was held into her grasp, empty. Bottles, known as alcohol decorated the bar. “Woman…” Vegeta whispered in confusion, setting down his water to stand before her. “What is wrong?”


Her eyes rose to him, and it seemed just now she noticed it was her husband who was before her. Her smile instantly appeared, “Veeegeetaaa.” She sung, standing from her chair and going to him, wrapping her arms around his neck, putting all her weight on him, “I missed you.” She whimpered, her lip pouting out.


Vegeta sneered, pushing her away, “What is wrong with you, woman? Are you intoxicated?”


“Drunk, not intoxsated.” She grabbed the vodka bottle, gulping the pure liquid. Vegeta yanked it away, throwing it to the floor, caring not for the glass that spilled everywhere. “Well, that was not necessary. Now I gots to clean that shit up. You do it.”


The last time she had been drunk was when Goku had died after the Cell games. And the only times she drinks anything was either at a party or when something bad happens. He grabbed her arms holding her still before him, “What happened?” He growled.


Her fun faded and anger was quickly to overtake her features. “Just leave alone.” She struggled violently against him and so she wouldn’t hurt herself he released her watching the little woman stumble drunkenly grabbing hold of the bar to keep herself from falling. “You won’t care anyway, so just leave me alone.” She turned to go to the elevator, Vegeta quickly following, catching her from hurting herself. Bulma snapped, yanking away, “I can take care of myself.” With the help of the couch she managed to get herself to the elevator before falling on her knees so suddenly. Vegeta crossed his arms over his chest to stare down at her disapprovingly. Her head rested on her thighs, hands fisting, and unexpectedly a sob reached his ears. He faltered stepping closer just to make sure he heard right. And sure enough she was weeping pitifully. He sighed with concern but he didn’t move. If she wanted to get up she would do so. Her head shook, “I can’t do anything.” She whimpered. “No matter how smart I am, I am useless. So totally useless.”


“Woman, what?”


“Daddy’s dying.” She released her harsh whisper. “He’s dying.”


Though it made sense, he was still confused on why she was taking this so hard. The old man was actually pretty old, and humans do die young, so why was the woman so upset? But he hadn’t been around her for so long unable to figure it out. She was close with her father. And his death would hurt her more then he would ever understand. He touched her shoulder but she flinched away, sitting back on her buttocks and pushing herself away, “You don’t care! You don’t! You never cared about him and you never cared about me! You don’t care if he dies! You don’t care if I die! You just don’t care!”


She has said worse before to him, especially after the Cell Games so her words just rolled over his back. Vegeta knew the woman better then he knew himself. She was hurting and her only way to heal is by trying to hurt others. “Woman you are drunk, go to bed before the brat wakes and finds you in such a mess.”


“Just leave me alone.” She whimpered pulling her legs to be hugged close to her chest. “You don’t care about me.”


“Not at the moment.” He mumbled grabbing the female, ignoring her constant weak struggling and childish words and pronunciations. He held her wiggling body and flew to their bedroom going straight for the shower where he set her down and snapped on the water, holding back his smirk when the cold liquid hit her hard. He had seen this done on TV and apparently it helps for some odd reason. She screamed and scrambled to get up, but her feet just slid on the wet ground, too drunk to do anything. Vegeta slammed the door after exiting.


He stripped of his shirt, stalling however when his ears heard a distant scream and the ki of his daughter spiked. His eyes turned to the bathroom but the woman was certainly out of commission on this one. He left the room, quickly going to her room, he felt no other ki and knew it had to be some type of nightmare. Vegeta saw the little girl hugging her fish tight in her grasp sitting up in the big bed, eyes wide with fright. He switched on her light, “What?” He questioned.


Her lip quivered and tears fell, “I had a bad dream.” She held up her arms and with uneasy tension Vegeta went to her, sitting upon her bed and allowing the little female to crawl on his lap and wrap her arms around his neck. Taking a deep breath, Vegeta set his hands on her back.


He thought back to how the woman would handled this. “What about?”


“This white mask. And a machine that makes lots of noise and cuts through stuff.” Vegeta stiffened when he heard her words. His heart suddenly picked up for what reason he didn’t know.


He pulled the young child away watching her rub her eyes with her small fists. “Do you remember?”


“Remember what, Daddy? I just remember the scary boys in my dream.”


He sighed sullenly touching her soft silk hair. “Go back to sleep, princess.” She nodded, Vegeta lifted her in his arms and laid her back down, covering her with the blanket.


“Can you leave the nightlight on?” Vegeta leaned down and flicked it on, watching the child smile, “You’re a good daddy.” She whispered, closing her eyes missing the expression in her father’s face. He touched her hair once again, leaving. The little female would remember soon enough and all would be well.


He entered the bedroom finding his woman curled up in a nightshirt on the bed, facing toward the blank TV. The lights were all on, giving him perfect view of her. He slowly turned off the lights except that of the side nightstand. He flipped on the TV for her before shutting the last light on. Vegeta rolled to his side in bed and reached for her, but Bulma flinched away. He growled flipping to his opposite side, his back facing her.


~~~~~~~````


So he had a brain tumor. Big deal. Vegeta stared at the old man who smiled nervously, cleaning his glasses, placing them on the tip of his nose as always. “Bulma’s a daddy’s girl, Vegeta. She’s going to take this hard. So be patient. Ignore her, stay away from her if that’s what you want.”


“You cannot be fixed?”


“No. The tumor is in the very center of my head. The brain is a very sensitive instrument. Just a touch could destroy brain cells.”


“How long until you die?”


Old Briefs smiled holding back his chuckles, “Maybe it would be best if Bulma came to live with me and her mother for awhile. Until she learns to cope. Living with your unbeknownst insensitivity will probably only make it worse. And to answer your question, it’s undetermined. I could die tomorrow or years from now. It all depends on how the tumor grows. But my own estimation is within a year, no sooner then a few months.”


“The brats?”


“I don’t want them to know anything is wrong. They have their life. Bra’s still finding hers. She doesn’t know what death is yet, and I don’t want to damage her fragile state. Trunks has his own troubles, no need to add to it.”


The elevator binged, Vegeta straightened his stance, finding his woman standing there, her eyes wide. “Dad what are you doing here?” She came over embracing him.


“Vegeta called me. Telling me you weren’t doing too good.”


Instantly her happiness over his visit vanished and her accusing, angry orbs were on her husband. “What?” Vegeta looked right back her, not intimidated by her appearance.


“Bulma I know this is a shock to you. So maybe you should come and live with your mother and me for awhile.” However Bulma didn’t say anything besides that of shaking her head then darting quickly to the elevator. Old Briefs scratched his head, “I wonder what’s wrong with her.”


Vegeta left without a word flying up to their bedroom to find his mate pacing the floor. He stepped down into the room her eyes ablaze when they landed on him, “How could you do that to me?!” She screamed, blasting Vegeta into bafflement. What the hell had he done? “How could you call my father! You’re suppose to be my husband, not my fucking enemy! How could you tell him that I’m not alright?!”


“Because you are not.”


“He can’t know that! He is dying, Vegeta! You think he wants to know that his daughter is handling it badly! I don’t want him to worry about me, it’s him that needs ME! Not the other way around! How could you tell him that! Do you know how weak you just made me feel! My father doesn’t need to know anything! All he needs to know is that I am here to help him through!”


“You cannot handle it, Woman. How the hell do you think you will be able to help him handle it?”

s
“I can handle it! So I got a bit down last night and drank! But that’s doesn’t mean I can’t take care of it! He is my father! And I will help him! I am your wife! You‘re supposed to help me! Not go to my father! He‘s needs all the strength he can get! And he won‘t get it by being strong for his pathetic daughter!”


“What the hell do you want me to do, woman?”


“Help me.” Those last words ended up in sobs, her shoulders brutally shaking. Vegeta, not knowing what else to do went to her, wrapped her convulsing body in his tight embrace. She cried into his shoulder, her arms weak at her sides. “I need you now more then ever. I can’t lose him.” She wailed. “I’m so scared.” Vegeta tightened his arms, hating those words upon his mate’s lips. “Help me, Vegeta. Please. I can’t do this alone. I can’t.” But Vegeta had no words he could express and no way of knowing how to deal with this type of situation.


Bulma felt his confusion, felt the lack of knowledge to help. She pulled away, arms wrapped around herself. She stumbled over to the bed, “Get out.” Bulma whispered curling up with her blankets. He made a step toward her but was stalled by her agony. “Get out!” Vegeta listened for once in his life and slammed the door on the way out. He was only angry with himself. And his failure as a husband.

~~~~~~`````

Vegeta occupied himself in the GR for the past three weeks not knowing what else to do with his time. No one was at C.C. for him to terrorize. Bulma and crew had gone to her parents, so he was all alone. Bored and alone.


The woman was a bitch. That’s all there was to it. Will never be happy with anything he does! Apparently everything he does and says is always wrong. Which by the way is very inaccurate. Everything she does and says is the negative side of the party. You would think after eighteen years of marriage she would know that by now. Human minds. So stupid.


Speaking of marriage. The date of their human bond was coming along shortly. Maybe she won’t talk to him till the day passes, that way he doesn’t have to do anything or get her anything. It’s not like she doesn’t have everything already. She doesn’t need anything for that anniversary thing.


Vegeta fought the ground, forcing himself on his hands and knees. He needed to change the subject. He was getting too distracted with the thoughts of pervious anniversaries, where he had evidently screwed up on many occasions. Vegeta fought his mind to think of his first born.


Trunks wasn’t told of anything that was going on here. It was obvious Bulma wanted everything to be on the ‘d-low’; a word he learned watching ‘Friends’.


Anyway news reports of Bulma’s movements were all over the Japanese TV but never did they reach America. However, American TV always made it here, but only because Japan’s Prince was there. He seemed to have gotten a side job modeling underwear, ironically enough. He was a ‘sex icon’ in Japan and now had made himself the same name in America. According to the America news reports, Trunks was on the mind of ninety-six percent of all females. The other four percent were lesbians, as says Bulma.


His modeling career gave him millions of American money, which pleased Bulma to no extent. Nesa on the other hand, Vegeta could sense was a bit jealous of the girls that screamed wildly whenever he exited his condo or his office. Nesa was now with Bulma in the Beach House, thankfully. Vegeta wanted to seal that baby’s mouth from all the wailing that came out of it.


Vegeta was looking for a decent meal. Damn Pizza boy gets too scared to hold the damn pizzas that he ends up dropping them all at the door. He didn’t really know what else to eat beside the pre-cooked meals that were on the borderline of none.


Stupidly, Vegeta dropped down on the deck that faced the shoreline. The sun was cut in half by the colorful horizon. The old man was sitting outside, a drink in his hand, smiling up at him. “Vegeta. We were just talking about you. We were wondering when you would come here to eat. Bunny made you a whole meal, go on then, she will fix it.”


Vegeta pretended like he heard nothing but followed his instruction. Sure enough the Old Woman screamed in delight, “Oh Vegeta, so good to see you.” She just had to go and kiss his cheek. After she turned away, he quickly rubbed her germs off. He was surprised by a giggle. Vegeta looked toward the living room where Bulma was seated. Once she met his gaze however she turned away. “Bra!” Sounding like an alarm clock, the Old Woman shouted.


The little girl bounced down the steps and ran to her father. She hung there attached to his neck while Vegeta just stood there, hands at his sides. Bra soon climbed down to play with Jory who was on the floor.


His attention went quickly on the table, food piled up. And a half hour later, there was nothing left. Since there was nothing else to do, Vegeta went out onto the back porch to leave when Bulma finally accosted him.


“I’m sorry, okay.” She sighed tiredly, staying seated while watching the waves crash down. But Vegeta said nothing so she finally looked to him. “Look, I don’t want to drag this out. I’m sorry I said those thing. But I’m only sorry of how I said them. I was angry and hurt. And I still am. But I’m thinking much clearer. You betrayed me when you went to my father. I know now that you were just trying to help. So in a way I’m sorry. However, you did make me feel pathetic and vulnerable and spineless. And when I did want your help, you didn’t want to give it. And that is what I can’t forgive.”


Vegeta’s anger finally got through. “What the fuck did you want me to do? Tell you ‘it will be alright’? That’s shit. Should I say to not worry about it? What good are those words? It will not be alright. It won’t get better. Do you wish for me to stand before you and lie like those stupid husbands on those TV shows?”


“No! I just want you to be my husband.”


He shook his head in confusion. However after there was silence for awhile and they had both gazed at the ocean, he finally had words. “I know.” he sighed, flexing his jaw. “I’m not capable of many things. It’s not because I can’t. It’s because I don’t know how. You want me to be a husband then teach it to me. You want me to show compassion then tell me how. You want me to help you, then tell me what I need to do--”


Bulma flung from her chair. “It’s nothing that can be taught, Vegeta! You just feel it!”


“Then why don’t I feel it?” Her brows knit. “Why do I feel not good enough? Why do I feel so lost when it comes to you and the brats? Why do I feel nothing of how to be normal?” She held no answer for confusion clouded her orbs. He sighed through his nose, turning his gaze away. “I do not belong here. I have never belonged.” Vegeta came back from his thoughts, finding the woman staring at him. He quickly righted the subject. “If I know anything I know that everything can be taught. Hate and love, formality and compassion, skepticism and trust. Everything can be taught.”


It was his eyes that got to her. Just like they had always done before. She felt her anger start to dwindle and tears filled her skies. Bulma took a small breath and smiled sadly. “No, Vegeta. You can’t be taught love. You can know about and you can see it. You can be told about it. But in order to feel it, it has to be in your heart.” She came to him and in his confusion, he allowed her to place her arms around his waist and rest her head on his chest


“How do I know if it is my heart or not?” Bulma looked up at him. “If it is in me, then why can I not tell you? I should know how to say it if it is my heart. If it is not there, then that would mean I do not feel it.”


She shook her head. “Love sometimes hides itself. Because the heart is being protected.” She could tell he didn’t understand. “You may not know how to describe it, but when you’re with me. Beside me. Alone. Quiet. I know it’s there. The feeling inside you. Because I feel it too. Words sometimes won’t be good enough to explain an emotion that you yourself aren‘t aware of.. It’s there, Vegeta. You just don’t know it. But it’s there.”


“If you know this. Why must I say the words you say to me? Why is it important?”


“Why are you afraid to love me, Vegeta?” His confusion was apparently. She had taken a different route. “Saying the words ’I love you’ sometimes makes it real. Not saying it means you’re afraid of it. I’m not going anywhere, Vegeta. I’m staying with you through the rest of our life and after life. I am a weakness to you. Saying you love me, will not be harmful to you. You will not be rejected. You will not be looked down upon.” She put a bravido smile on. “It will definitely get you laid.” He smirked playfully. Bulma got serious quick. “And your pride will not be taken from you.” Vegeta didn’t have a response and after staring at him for a minute Bulma faked her smile while tears were welling in her eyes. She watched his facial expressions, watched each movement of his clenching jaw. But all he did was stare at her, so tensed in his muscles. Bulma wiped her cheek of a stray tear, swallowed the pain that was echoing from her heart. She forced her rejection in her gut as she touched his cheek. “You don’t belong to this world, Vegeta. But you belong to me.” She wrapped her arms around him. Baring her head against his neck, sighing when feeling his strong arms encircling her body. “This will be very hard on me, Vegeta. The more I spend with my father, the more I see the signs of his illness. And it’s ripping me apart. But what’s getting the most of my tears, is that I go to bed alone every night with no one to take away my problems. I need you here. I need you now. More then ever. And you don’t have to do anything different from what you have been doing for the years we’ve been together. Just be here when I close my eyes and be here when I open them. That’s all I need.” She kissed his lips, her heart racing for his touch. He gripped her tight to her relief. But soon she parted and holding on to his hand she led him inside.

~~~~~`````


“What number are we on today?”


“Ten.”


“Do you know her name?”


“No. She had no name. She was a slave.”


“How old were you?”


“Fourteen.”


“And what caused this?”


“Zarbon.”


“He was the man that…”


“Yes.”


“Okay, is that why?”


“No. He had lied to Frieza, saying I was conducting an escape plan. He even got innocent creatures involved and got them all killed just on behalf of getting me beaten.”


“Did it work?”


“My punishment was to rape her. He knew how I prided myself, and that was his way of locking his chains to my wrists so I would never have the will to leave.”


“So what is it about this one that pains you still?”


Vegeta shot a glare at the doctor. How the hell did this man know him so well? He showed no emotions in his voice. But then again, maybe that was it. “Frieza kept her alive. She became my servant.”


“Okay…”


“She was with child.”


“Oh, shit.” The doctor quickly wrote on his pad. “Was it yours?”


“Never knew. I killed her the moment I found out.”


“Why?”


“If she were to go through with the pregnancy, a fate worse then death would have greeted her. Females are never to conceive. For those brats will become the possession of Frieza. And if there is anything worse then being Frieza’s solider. It’s being his entirely.”


“What did Frieza do when he found out you killed her?”


“I was sent to an inhibited planet for isolation. I would not have cared, had the planet had any food whatsoever on it. But it had nothing. And I was left for a shift and when I returned, drained of all my power, Frieza beat me again.”


“He loved to beat you.”


“I was a challenge for him to conquer.”


“But he never won. That should give you some pride that he stole back.”


“He won.” Vegeta sighed turning his back, “If he hadn’t I wouldn’t need to be here.”