Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction ❯ Heart of Fire ❯ Goodbye ( Chapter 1 )
[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]
By: SonSofia 
Goku leaves the planet, hoping to forget his obessesion for the Saiyan Prince, but at what cost?
Anime/Manga: Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Psychological / Angst | Type: Alternate Universe | Uploaded On: 09.15.2006 | Pages: 1 | Words: 963 | Visits: 195 | Status: Completed
Goku leaves the planet, hoping to forget his obessesion for the Saiyan Prince, but at what cost?
Anime/Manga: Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Psychological / Angst | Type: Alternate Universe | Uploaded On: 09.15.2006 | Pages: 1 | Words: 963 | Visits: 195 | Status: Completed
Heart of Fire
Disclaimer: I don’t own Dragonball z/GT. I’m not Akira Toriyama. Or whoever owns Dragonball GT. I wish I were. Kudos to them. Anyhow on with the story!
Chapter One -Goodbye.
***************************
I haven’t slept in days.
Sleep alludes me, I can’t seem to keep my eyes closed for a long period of time.
I don’t dream. I just lie awake wondering, why I feel the need to punish myself with my own thoughts. Restless as I am, I always feel tired, but I just can’t sleep. It’s more than insomnia.
It’s insanity.
Feelings, thoughts, and other emotions bombard my psyche, stealing from me all that is inane and normal. I am different now. I am no longer the man that wants for others more than he wants for himself. I want. I need. Just like everyone else, but unlike everyone else, what I want is beyond unobtainable. It is out of reach. It is an impossibility, of that I am certain.
Roll with the punches. Go with the flow.
Life as usual. I would start with waking up, but I never go to sleep anymore. So I eat when I can, spar, when I can, and think when I can. And these days I have all the time in the world to think. I can think about him, but I can never have him, never touch him, never tell him how I feel. Because he will reject me, hurt me, kill me.
I don’t feel as though I could keep going through life this way. So many more years to go. I curse my Saiyan heritage, of which I know nothing about. I am only 87. And have as many as 100 plus years to go on living. But I don’t think I can. Not here.
My wife is dead, one of my sons, Goten, is gone as well, all the result of life taking its toll. Goten was killed in a freak accident. Your thinking, he’s part Saiyan, what accident could kill him? But you must remember, that he is also half human and that side of him failed him. I won’t go into detail, as I have long since grieved.
My eldest son Gohan, doesn’t even visit anymore.
I’m not surprised. He’s happy, he has found the one he loves and there is no space for a needy stupid man like me. Meanwhile, I want what I can't have.
I have contemplated leaving the planet, the idea still fresh in my mind. Who would miss me? Not him. I could leave any day now and he would only see it as a lost sparring partner. Nothing special. Nothing worth loving.
I have my things packed and I am ready but still I hesitate.
What if?
What if what? If he wants me to stay? If he loves me like I love him?
Yeah, I think I will leave. But I want so desperately to say goodbye. I cant leave without at least giving him that. Not that I owe it to him. I fly over to Capsule Corp, where he has continued living after Bulma died and Trunks moved out. I know where to find him and I land in front of the Gravity Machine. I don’t think before I’m knocking on the door.
A stream of curses could be heard from the other side. He always was very expressive. The door hisses open and I am staring down into his scowling face. He is obviously not happy to see me.
"What the hell do, you want Kakarot?" I suck in a breathe. "I’m leaving" His _expression does not change. "Then go" He tries to close the door. I realize he doesn’t understand. I push the door open and walk in. By now he is shaking with rage. "What the hell do you think your doing you said you were leaving, so go home, clown!"
I shake my head sadly. "No, Vegeta, I’m leaving the planet, and I wanted to say goodbye"
His eyes widen and for a moment, I thought I saw a flash of regret. Wishful thinking. "Your what?" he asks. Almost as if he cant believe it. I say it again. "I’m leaving, I need to leave here, I cant stay" "Why?" He asks. I don’t expect this and don’t know how to answer. "......" "Why?" Again. "I.... just...am, I cant stay" He sneers and turns around. "Fine then, go, I don’t need you here anyway, third class"
That’s what I thought.
Without another word, I turn and walk out of the room and don’t look back. This is the last time I will see him and I can’t even bring myself to look at him one last time. He won’t miss, he wants this as much as I do. I keep walking expecting to hear, "Kakarot, wait" but I hear nothing and I fly away, never to be seen again.
******************************
This is my first fic, so please have mercy and review. I look forward to it. I’ll try to write more, this is a prologue and I wanted to start it the right way. See ya! - SonSofia.
Disclaimer: I don’t own Dragonball z/GT. I’m not Akira Toriyama. Or whoever owns Dragonball GT. I wish I were. Kudos to them. Anyhow on with the story!
Chapter One -Goodbye.
***************************
I haven’t slept in days.
Sleep alludes me, I can’t seem to keep my eyes closed for a long period of time.
I don’t dream. I just lie awake wondering, why I feel the need to punish myself with my own thoughts. Restless as I am, I always feel tired, but I just can’t sleep. It’s more than insomnia.
It’s insanity.
Feelings, thoughts, and other emotions bombard my psyche, stealing from me all that is inane and normal. I am different now. I am no longer the man that wants for others more than he wants for himself. I want. I need. Just like everyone else, but unlike everyone else, what I want is beyond unobtainable. It is out of reach. It is an impossibility, of that I am certain.
Roll with the punches. Go with the flow.
Life as usual. I would start with waking up, but I never go to sleep anymore. So I eat when I can, spar, when I can, and think when I can. And these days I have all the time in the world to think. I can think about him, but I can never have him, never touch him, never tell him how I feel. Because he will reject me, hurt me, kill me.
I don’t feel as though I could keep going through life this way. So many more years to go. I curse my Saiyan heritage, of which I know nothing about. I am only 87. And have as many as 100 plus years to go on living. But I don’t think I can. Not here.
My wife is dead, one of my sons, Goten, is gone as well, all the result of life taking its toll. Goten was killed in a freak accident. Your thinking, he’s part Saiyan, what accident could kill him? But you must remember, that he is also half human and that side of him failed him. I won’t go into detail, as I have long since grieved.
My eldest son Gohan, doesn’t even visit anymore.
I’m not surprised. He’s happy, he has found the one he loves and there is no space for a needy stupid man like me. Meanwhile, I want what I can't have.
I have contemplated leaving the planet, the idea still fresh in my mind. Who would miss me? Not him. I could leave any day now and he would only see it as a lost sparring partner. Nothing special. Nothing worth loving.
I have my things packed and I am ready but still I hesitate.
What if?
What if what? If he wants me to stay? If he loves me like I love him?
Yeah, I think I will leave. But I want so desperately to say goodbye. I cant leave without at least giving him that. Not that I owe it to him. I fly over to Capsule Corp, where he has continued living after Bulma died and Trunks moved out. I know where to find him and I land in front of the Gravity Machine. I don’t think before I’m knocking on the door.
A stream of curses could be heard from the other side. He always was very expressive. The door hisses open and I am staring down into his scowling face. He is obviously not happy to see me.
"What the hell do, you want Kakarot?" I suck in a breathe. "I’m leaving" His _expression does not change. "Then go" He tries to close the door. I realize he doesn’t understand. I push the door open and walk in. By now he is shaking with rage. "What the hell do you think your doing you said you were leaving, so go home, clown!"
I shake my head sadly. "No, Vegeta, I’m leaving the planet, and I wanted to say goodbye"
His eyes widen and for a moment, I thought I saw a flash of regret. Wishful thinking. "Your what?" he asks. Almost as if he cant believe it. I say it again. "I’m leaving, I need to leave here, I cant stay" "Why?" He asks. I don’t expect this and don’t know how to answer. "......" "Why?" Again. "I.... just...am, I cant stay" He sneers and turns around. "Fine then, go, I don’t need you here anyway, third class"
That’s what I thought.
Without another word, I turn and walk out of the room and don’t look back. This is the last time I will see him and I can’t even bring myself to look at him one last time. He won’t miss, he wants this as much as I do. I keep walking expecting to hear, "Kakarot, wait" but I hear nothing and I fly away, never to be seen again.
******************************
This is my first fic, so please have mercy and review. I look forward to it. I’ll try to write more, this is a prologue and I wanted to start it the right way. See ya! - SonSofia.