Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction ❯ Little Pleasure Prince ❯ Chapter 1 ( Chapter 1 )

Um, no. I was just bored and decided to try my hand in inane comedy that kind of has a plot…. Hopefully it proves entertaining. I hope I don't give you all nightmares…. BTW, no I don't own it. Although I've been told I should…. ^_^;

Chapter 1

Mrs. Briefs walked in, looking with sealed, happy eyes at the Saiyan who merely raised one eye from his meal and went right on eating. Mrs. Briefs stopped beside his chair and continued to smile inanely, causing the Prince to finally divide his attention between his meal and the strange human.

"Vegeta honey, could you do something for me?" Mrs. Briefs clasped her hands in front of her and tilted her head to one side, not one strand of her curly, blonde hair falling out of place.

Vegeta raised a brow and said nothing, going back to his meal. It was an obvious answer.

However, Mrs. Briefs wasn't too keen on obvious answers. "Vegeta?" She put her hands to her back and Vegeta's jaw dropped as the nice, flowered summer dress she had been wearing slipped completely from her body to pool at her feet, leaving her quite naked except for the tiniest of undergarments. "Does this lingerie make me look fat?"

Vegeta was still searching for a way to either answer her or pry his wide eyes from the sight before him when Bulma walked in.

She struck a classic I-don't-believe-it pose. "Vegeta! How dare you seduce my mother like that! She's married!"

Vegeta opened his mouth to protest such a ridiculous claim, but Mrs. Briefs reacted first, tripping over the dress around her ankles and conveniently falling right into Vegeta's lap. Considering where she had fallen and what she was grabbing to right herself, Vegeta did a very good job keeping in his yelp of surprise.

As Mrs. Briefs slipped on her dress, Bulma made a revolted noise and turned on her heel. "You're disgusting, Vegeta!"

Vegeta stood himself, as much to get away from the crazy mother of the woman as to chase the woman down. "But I didn't do anything!"

Bulma stopped her stalk down the hall and turned to Vegeta to sneer at the whining undertone to his voice, "Oh, I'm sure my mother just walked right in while you were eating and undressed in front of you to see if you thought her matching lingerie made her look fat! That's really pathetic, Vegeta!"

Vegeta raised both his arms in a shrug, looking bewildered, "But that's exactly what happened!"

Bulma rolled her eyes, "Pathetic. Why don't you go train or something? About the only thing you're good for around this house is making sure I'm kept busy getting you food and fixing the Gravity Room." She whirled back around and walked away, muttering something about Saiyan Princes not being to control their hormones.

Vegeta considered going after the woman again to set her straight, but one glance behind him convinced him otherwise.

Mrs. Briefs had been steadily sneaking up behind him. As soon as she noticed his eyes on her, she, still smiling blankly, started to play with her strap, slipping it down quite suggestively. "Oh Vegeta- Honey, I still need your help." The tone was much too smooth for Vegeta's liking.

Vegeta stared for one wide-eyed, panicked moment at Mrs. Briefs before bolting for the Gravity Room and locking himself in, for once deciding that listening to the woman was a smart thing.

^_^;

Vegeta had been avoiding Mrs. Briefs for a week now. Every time he saw her, he quickly turned and walked away. He had even gone so far as to skip meals and lock himself in the GR overnight. Bulma thought it quite confusing that Vegeta would be in the middle of an argument with her, spy her mother, and dash off. Well, kind of cute, but disturbing too.

She had confronted her mother about it, but her mom, with customary Mrs. Briefs' blankness, would respond, "Whatever do you mean, dear? Vegeta and I get along just fabulously."

Bulma blinked at her mother's idiocy, was she and Kakarott related in some way, and walked off to go try to pry Vegeta from his GR so he could get some much-needed food.

She tried to glance in the window of the GR, frowning as she rubbed her arms to ward off the slight chill to the air. Okay, now she knew something was wrong. Vegeta liked people to ogle him as he worked-out. Bulma definitely remembered all the times she had seen him, sweat dripping off his masculine form, smirking from the corner of his mouth as if he knew she was there. Not that she was looking at him or anything. Far be it for her to be-attracted to the Prince of all Saiyans.

The window looked to have been covered with cardboard. She knocked and heard a muffled voice on the other side. "Who is it?"

She sighed with exasperation, "It's me."

There was a pause, "Who's 'me'?"

With an aggravated huff, she again pounded on the door, "Bulma Briefs me, idiot! Now open up!"

The voice raised in pitch and tone, coming out sly, as if Vegeta had caught her in the middle of some sneaky act. "How do I know you aren't Mrs. Briefs pretending to be the woman?"

"BECAUSE MRS. BRIEFS WOULDN'T BE SCREAMING AT THE TOP OF HER LUNGS AND THREATENING BURNT FOOD IF A CERTAIN SAIYAN PRINCE DIDN'T OPEN UP THE GRAVITY ROOM!"

She smirked in satisfaction as the door slid open and a hesitant-looking Vegeta stared at her. "You're sure you're you?"

She rolled her eyes, "For Kami's sake! You and mom have been acting so weird lately…."

Vegeta stuck his head tentatively out the door, looking to the right and left, "She isn't around is she?"

Bulma shook her head, again rolling her eyes as she grabbed the reluctant Vegeta and pulled him completely out of the room. He actually flinched as the door closed behind him. "What's with you? You've been avoiding mom like she has some kind of disease or like you two-" She covered her mouth with one hand, "You two didn't-oh my-Vegeta! You and-my mother?"

Vegeta's look was one of pure horror. "My gods, woman! Are you crazy? She came onto ME in the kitchen! I swear!"

Bulma rolled her eyes, shivering once again as the wind picked up, "Whatever. I hope you're telling the truth…at least about you two-" Her shudder this time was not because of the cold.

Bulma's eyes widened as a golden aura surrounded her, fending off the cold as easily as a heating blanket. She looked over at Vegeta, who was looking nervously around, noting her stare and turning to look fully at her. "What?"

Bulma smiled, "Thanks, Vegeta!"

Vegeta then seemed to notice that he had extended his aura to include her in its warmth. He grimaced, "This isn't one of those nice, generous, and kind things that are supposed to make me sickeningly sweet is it?"

Bulma beamed at him, "And you are just the sweetest, kindest, 'cootest', 'wittle' Saiyan in the world, yes you are!"

Vegeta sweat-dropped and the aura immediately vanished. He smirked at Bulma's crestfallen look, "Wouldn't want to be out of character."

Bulma huffed, "Well? Hurry up. The food's getting cold."

Vegeta followed her; staying so close he kept tripping her with his boots. She finally whirled around, "Will you stop that?"

Vegeta scooted closer to her. "You'll protect me from her, won't you?"

Bulma rolled her eyes, "My mother is not some alien-controlled, hormone-driven woman who had eyes for you and only you and is drawn to you like a magnet so back up, buster!" She smirked, "Besides, I wouldn't want to be out of character."

He frowned at her throwback of his own words and followed her from a distance, though Bulma could still feel his breath on her neck.

Vegeta breathed a sigh of relief as they entered the kitchen to find no one there and sat down to inhale the food before Mrs. Briefs did pop up.

Bulma moved sat at the table across from, wanting to keep the man's sleazy hands off her mother. She frowned slightly as she heard the doorbell ring. She wasn't expecting anyone today.

Getting up and going to the front door, she opened it to blink at the woman on the other side. "ChiChi! What a pleasant surprise!"

ChiChi craned her head around, as if trying to see behind Bulma. "Yeah. Hi, Bulma. Is Vegeta around?"

Bulma sweat-dropped, raising an eyebrow at the black-haired woman before her, "Um, yeah. Why? Did Goku want to spa-?" She trailed off as she suddenly noticed the empty air in front of her. Shrugging, she turned and closed the door, starting back to the kitchen. She took off into a run as she heard a commotion from said kitchen. If Vegeta was doing anything to her mother, she'd-

She halted, both eyebrows raised to her hairline and a definite case of nausea coming on.

Vegeta was trying in vain to pry the groping, black-haired female off his chest as she literally had latched onto it and wouldn't let go.

ChiChi was breathily saying, "I've always wanted you, you sexy Saiyan Prince," over and over again. However, Vegeta was much more concerned about the lack of clothing that surrounded the harpy and his own bodysuit being ripped to shreds by lacquered nails.

He finally managed to heave the woman off him, jumping onto the table and shrieking as if he'd seen a mouse. "Kill it! Kill it! Kill it!"

Bulma folded her arms across her chest and watched as Vegeta used his foot to push ChiChi away, who was trying to climb the table with a come-hither look. "Vegeta! First Mrs. Briefs, now ChiChi! I'm calling Goku!"

Vegeta whirled to look at her, which allowed ChiChi to glomp him off the table and onto the floor. "Woman! Get this harpy off me!"

Bulma frowned as she watched the two rolling on the floor. Hm, it actually seemed like Vegeta was trying to get away from ChiChi. She really wanted to further study this interesting phenomenon, but Vegeta's shrieks were getting insistently higher in pitch and Bulma finally reached down and grabbed ChiChi by the collar, heaving the woman off of the Vegeta and carrying her out the back door, depositing her on the steps and firmly closing the door.

Vegeta lay on the floor, trying to catch his breath, as Bulma turned back around. "Well, Vegeta? You see where all your seducing has gotten you? Now I'll really have to be convinced to keep from telling Goku."

Vegeta managed to lever his head up to glare at the woman, "What, you think I'm going to 'seduce' you? If-IF I was really seducing those two and wanted to continue down the list, you'd be last-no, you wouldn't even be ON the list."

"Oh, so you have a list?" Bulma's eyebrow rose and her frown deepened.

Vegeta rolled his eyes, "I do NOT have a list, woman! I clearly said IF! Now could you please help-" He trailed off, his head going back to stare wide-eyed as Mrs. Briefs walked into the kitchen.

She took one look at the compromising position Vegeta was in and let out a squeal from her high school days, managing to perfectly copy ChiChi in a glomp.

Luckily, Vegeta's seemingly helpless wasn't so helpless, as he kicked up his heels and sprang up, taking off toward the safety of his Gravity Room with Mrs. Briefs hot on his tail-wait, he doesn't have a tail right now….

Bulma shook her head slowly, "Well, that was weird."

^_^;

Vegeta closed the door to his Gravity Room and securely locked it, leaning against it and panting heavily. What in world was wrong with these women? Did human females go in heat all at the same time or something? No, cause the woman wasn't being affected in the slightest.

"It's the salami. The salami's out to get me!" He quickly slapped himself, first on one cheek, then the other. "OW! Snap out of it, Vegeta! We need to think! Yes, we need to come up with a plan."

He stiffened as he most clearly heard two feminine voices outside calling to him.

"Vegeta honey, I really need your opinion on this new bath towel I got. I need to know if it looks better wrapped around my chest or yours."

"Oh Vegeta, you bad monkey, you! I've wanted you since I first set eyes on you! The only reason I didn't jump you right then was because Goku was in the way."

Vegeta felt like passing out right at that moment. Not all the tortures Frieza had put him through could've prepared him for this Hell. He shakily answered both of them, voice stronger at the end. "Get away from me or I'll blast you all to oblivion!"

He heard a sigh that was patent of a fan girl, "Oh my gosh! Did you hear his voice! I think I could die right now and be happy!"

"Vegeta, come on out! You can blast both of us to oblivion and back! We're willing to share."

Vegeta gulped and backed away from the door, looking at it as if it would open and suddenly reveal two demons-succubus to be exact. He had to think of something and quick.

He turned to look at what was in the room. A true warrior uses his environment after all. Oh wait, that was a true ninja. He really had to lay off the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movies.

Control panel, communications screen, gravity controller, fridge, cot, bench, and towels…. Snapping his finger, Vegeta made his way to the fridge, opened it, and pulled out a bottle of water.

Ignoring just how cold the water was, he twisted the cap and upended the whole thing over his head, shaking it to make sure he got every droplet to cling to him. He then draped one of the towels over his shoulders and made his way over to the communications screen, putting on his charming lady's man smirk as he turned it on.

ChiChi and Mrs. Brief's faces lit up as his own apparently sweat-soaked one appeared on the screen. Giving twin shrieks of delight at the look on his face, they both tried to grab at the screen in an effort to bring him closer.

"Hey, girls." Vegeta put on the smoothest voice he could, sounding like Sean Connery in a Highlander movie. "I was wondering if you could do me a favor?"

Both women nodded eagerly, not daring to speak for fear of breaking the spell.

"I seem to have lost my cup and I certainly can't train without it. I have a spare in a secret hiding place in the mountains just behind Capsule. Could one-better yet both of you gorgeous girls get it for me? I'd really appreciate it. Maybe even let you watch me train…." He flashed his teeth and watched with a detached disgust as both girls swooned.

Without another word, they dashed off, vanishing around the corner of Capsule Corporation for a fruitless and long search. Vegeta gave a great sigh of relief and started to turn off the screen when another face popped up into it.

Bulma frowned as the face before her, was that sweat, shrieked and jumped back from the screen on his side. "Didn't mean to startle you, Vegeta. Just wanted to ask if you were okay and if you were spending the night in there again.

Vegeta rolled his eyes, "No to both questions. Thankfully I shook Kakarott's harpy of a wife and your dimwit mother off my scent. Will you please believe me and get those two away from me somehow? I certainly would not lower myself to 'flirting' with a human female! You're all loud and obnoxious and-" He stopped, realizing a bit too late that the one he wanted help from was one of those loud, obnoxious human females.

Bulma tilted her nose in the air, "Oh? You want help from a loud, obnoxious human female to get rid of loud, obnoxious human females that you incited? Oh, that's rich, Vegeta!" With no other word, and not a chance for Vegeta to reiterate the fact that he'd done nothing, Bulma turned and stalked away.

^_^;

It was nightfall before Vegeta finally woke up, eyes glistening in the darkness as he strained to hear what had awakened him. He started in surprise as he clearly heard a clattering sound from his window.

He rolled off the bed and carefully crawled to the window, cursing softly as his hand landed right on a tack, what was a tack doing on the floor, and his head hit the nightstand, hadn't it been on the other side of his bed.

Carefully, he eased his head over the side of the windowsill, coming face to face with a youthful visage, definitely female in appearance but unknown to him.

"Who are you?"

Both asked the question at the same time and Vegeta scowled, stepping up and back, folding his arms across the chest. "I believe you're the one who is climbing into my room, so you tell me."

The girl shook her head, "I'm not climbing into your room." She heaved herself up the last bit and swung her legs up and over the side of the windowsill. "Now I'm climbing into your room."

Vegeta rolled his eyes, somehow keeping them trained on the girl as she hopped down from the window and looked around her. "I'm only asking one more time. Who are you?"

The girl smiled, almost a smirk, taking in his whole form with satisfied eyes. He was wearing his pink badman shirt with the yellow pants; he liked to sleep in them at night for some reason. "JadedBest. And you are?"

Vegeta cocked his head to one side, wondering what exactly this female was on, "Vegeta."

"Well, Vegeta, I suppose we should get started." With that said, JadedBest began to strip.

Both hands came up as Vegeta moved to stop her, halting as she stilled and looked at him with confusion. "What are you doing?"

JadedBest grinned, "What? Didn't you know that I'm an alien-controlled, hormone-driven woman who had eyes for you and only you and is drawn to you like a magnet?"

Vegeta eyes were as wide as they could go as he futilely tried to back up. Well, it is hard to go backwards when a robe is tangling up one's feet.

He glanced down at the robe. Where in the world had that come fro-

Of course, the answer to his question came in the form of the female silhouette that appeared in the now-open bathroom door to his right. Yet another girl stepped into his room, bath towel wrapped around hair and waist. "Oh, hey, Vegeta. I hope you don't mind that I moved your nightstand. I think a tack fell out of it though. Hey! You're stepping on my robe!"

Vegeta paled as Marron, Krillin's ex-girlfriend, moved swiftly to him and yanked the robe from under his feet, sending him stumbling to the ground. He looked up to see both girls moving towards him, and neither looked very innocent in intentions.

With a yelp he scurried up and bolted for the door, fumbling for the doorknob and cursing as it wouldn't turn. Locked. Forgetting that he could easily knock down the door with his superhuman strength, hey you try to concentrate with women attacking you with one thing on their minds, he whirled around to find both women almost on him. Using a burst of speed, he went right in the middle of them and took a flying leap out the window.

Oh he intended on staying as far away from any women as he possibly could for as long as could.

Finally he landed on a deserted island, in the middle of nowhere. It was one of those small islands, like the Turtle Hermit lived on. Sighing with relief, Vegeta dropped down underneath a coconut tree. Unfortunately, he plopped down a little too hard. One of the coconuts was loosened from its hold and plummeted down to hit Vegeta squarely on the head.

Vegeta being as hardheaded as he was, he didn't even notice until the fruit fell into his lap. Giving an unconcerned shrug, he cracked the coconut open and immediately began to feast on the naturally sweet food.

"Mm, Vegeta. That looks good. Wanna share?"

Vegeta's eyes once again as wide as they could go, he turned slowly around, dreading whatever was behind him.

Launch leaned in close to Vegeta's ear, twining a piece of his black hair around her finger. "I'm hungry." The way she purred the word left no doubt of where her appetite lay.

Vegeta jumped up as if he'd been burned, wasting no time in leaping up and away, heedless of the fact that he had now left a total of five women lacking.

Okay, he needed one woman right now. She seemed to be the only one not affected with what he feared everyone was affected by. Oh sure, any man would tell you this was a dream, but just wait till the real ugly one starts coming onto him, then he'll sing a different tune. Vegeta? He didn't want any woman, let alone all of them at once!

Now, how to convince Bulma that he wasn't crazy and really, truly, hadn't done anything. Was he really that close to the begging point? He gritted his teeth as he landed in CC's lawn and headed immediately to the woman's room. He surely hoped not.

A/N: That's it. I've cracked…. I've hit the loop and fallen off the track. Killed a lot of people on me too. Nevermind. Anyways, JadedBest is a real person, in appreciation for her great loyalty in reviewing my stories…well, here she is…seducing Vegeta. I might be convinced to put others in here as well. (shrugs) JB just kinda popped up…. Hey! Go read her stories! If you like this, you'll love Willpower! ^_^;

JadedBest: I hope you don't mind. Though I have a feeling with the way you wrote Ch 6 of Willpower, that you won't mind at all…. I still blush every time I think about that chapter!

Hey, Review! Pwease? I'd love to put Vegeta through more horrendous horrors, but I do need your help….

^_^;