Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction ❯ Little Pleasure Prince ❯ Chapter 2 ( Chapter 2 )

I might want to add that any real people and aliases used by reviewers and authors are not mine and aren't really or haven't really done this. Although JadedBest wishes she had. Anyways, enjoy. No, I don't own this. I'm too crazy to.

Chapter 2

Bulma turned in her sleep, her dreams full of a certain flame-haired, arrogant jerk of a Saiyan Prince who was currently using his huge ego to send her into an ecstasy of euphoria and sensation that had her squirming underneath him.

Vegeta entered her room just in time to see her make a particularly forceful upward motion and almost blushed to the roots of his hair. Okay, that was…weird…and disconcerting. "Woman…."

The word was whispered and only succeeded in making Bulma shout out encouragement to her fantasy bliss-maker.

"WOMAN!"

Bulma shot straight out of her bed, eyes darting around to finally settle on the Saiyan Prince standing a little ways in the darkness. Trying to wipe away the last vestiges of that great-no, disturbing dream, Bulma blinked at the man. The details of said dream came back to her and she wondered just how much she might have said or done. She decided to cover up her sudden panic with good old anger. "What are you doing in my room, Vegeta? Are you nuts! It's," she glanced at the clock, "two in the morning!"

Vegeta cleared his throat uncomfortably, scanning the surrounding area for any moving ki. Besides the woman's, there was no one up. "I need your help."

Both of Bulma's eyebrows went up. "Um, Vegeta. I don't think about you that way, seriously I don't." She was obviously still caught up in the dream.

Vegeta cocked his head to one side, "Huh? Nevermind-it's all these women, woman," he blinked as the two 'wuh' sounds together made him feel like his mouth was full of peanut butter. "I was sleeping and one started climbing into my window…then there was Marron, and Launch wanted some of my coconut but I didn't want to share!"

Bulma moved carefully toward the man who looked to be cracking. "Whoa, Vegeta! Calm down. Take a deep breath…. Okay, now did you, in any way, shape, or form, make any advances on these women?"

Vegeta did as the woman as suggested then shook his head. He tilted his head to one side, "They could've been attracted to my manliness. I mean; I do make a mean spaghetti casserole."

"Err, Vegeta…you don't cook."

Vegeta blinked and shook his head to relieve it of the cobwebs. "Right. Um, anyways, all these women are attracted to me like a magnet and I'm afraid it's the same with the whole world! You're the only one not affected and I need you to somehow get these women-un-attracted to me."

Bulma nodded, "Are you sure you didn't just have a bad dream, Vegeta? Nightmares are quite common you know, even for a Saiyan. I remember one time when Goku-"

As the screen around him began to cloud up, Vegeta broke through, waving his hands to get rid of the smoke and wavering picture. "Woman! We don't have time for flashbacks. I was not having a nightmare-I'm living one! Are you going to help me or am I going to have to force you to?"

Bulma struck a defiant pose, "Excuse me? What in the world makes you think you can make me do anyth-iiinnnggg!!!" The last word ended in a high-pitched squeal as Vegeta suddenly lifted Bulma from the ground and carried her outside.

Bulma began to hit on Vegeta's arm, "I'm only wearing my nightgown, Vegeta! Put me down right this instant!"

Bulma let out another shriek as Vegeta's grip suddenly loosened and she slipped down. He tightened his hold and shifted so she was once again secure. She looked up to find him smirking down at her, saying one word that summed it up nicely. "Smack!"

Bulma's face went pale and took on a slight tinge of green, as if she wanted to become a relative of Piccolo's. She clutched Vegeta's arm, drawing into him instead of away.

Vegeta finally spied the island Launch had wanted lunch with him on and gently floated down to it, setting the woman down and glancing around nervously. Where was she?

Before Bulma could again start yelling at Vegeta, she heard a small sound and turned to stare with wide eyes at an unusual sight. It seemed Launch thought the tree was-someone else. She was-okay, now Bulma had to look away. That was just sick.

Vegeta himself had tilted his head to one side and was trying to study the picture in front of him better, "How is she-?" An elbow to his ribs reminded him that not only was he supposed to look away, but that was also supposed to be him.

Turning as white and green-tinged as Bulma had, Vegeta locked eyes with Bulma. "You're the one freaky thing in my freaky world that still makes sense."

Bulma scoffed, secretly pleased at the compliment. "You've been watching too much Buffy, Vegeta. And that's freaky…." She sweat-dropped.

Vegeta followed suit, until he heard a distinctive call. "Oh, there you are, Vegeta!"

He turned with a horrified expression to see-he cursed vividly. Mrs. Briefs stepped out of the air car that landed just behind him and Bulma. ChiChi, Marron, and that JadedBest chick followed suit, eyes all on him as Vegeta steadily backed up.

Bulma looked from one group to the other-well, if you counted Launch and her tree, three groups. It was quite obvious that it was the women coming onto Vegeta and not the other way, although she wondered why Vegeta was complaining. Suddenly getting a nice mental image of Master Roshi, Oolong, and every other pervert in the world doing what these women were doing to Vegeta, Bulma shuddered.

She quickly ran up to Vegeta, "Vegeta! I believe you! Let's go!"

Vegeta blinked, sweat forming on his brow, "I hear them, woman. Can you hear the children laughing?"

Bulma took her hand and gave Vegeta a nice backhand, bringing him stingingly back to reality. "Snap out of it, Vegeta! You can fly! Now get us out of here!"

Vegeta nodded, grabbed the woman, and lifted off just as four women glomped the area he had been standing in. It would have been five had Launch not been-distracted.

O.O

Four hours later, Bulma held up the machine that would cure Vegeta. Or maybe it was cure the world. It all depended on one's perspective.

Anyways, Vegeta studied the contraption with interest, noting the shiny buttons on the sides-he liked buttons….

He rubbed his hand and scowled as Bulma slapped it away. "Don't touch that! That'll make it self-destruct!"

He still rubbed his hand, though the hit was no more than a mosquito bite. It had stung his dignity more. "Why in the world do you have a self-destruct button on that thing?"

Bulma rolled her eyes, "Everything has a self-destruct button, Vegeta! It's an inventor's device. And it's not a 'thing', it's a DeWomanizer!"

Vegeta cocked a brow, "A de-what-in-izer?"

"A DeWomanizer! We simply go to a deserted place where we are sure to be ambushed and push the green button-not the red button, not the blue button, but the green button. Then we say the magic words and all the women of the world will be cured of this grave affliction."

Vegeta huffed. "Not every woman gets to be attracted to the Prince of all Saiyans. They should feel privileged." He ignored her laugh of ridicule. "Why do you have a blue and red button if we aren't going to be using it?"

Bulma sighed with exasperation, rolling her eyes again, "The red button is the self-destruct button and the blue button is there because I like the color blue! I'm the inventor; stop criticizing the invention that will save your-virginity."

Vegeta opened his mouth, focusing on the one statement that mattered, "I am NOT a virgin! I've done it lots of times! Probably more than you!"

Thinking of her loser ex-boyfriend, Bulma grimaced and murmured something that sounded suspiciously like 'probably'. "Nevermind that! Let's go! I want to get some much-needed beauty rest after this."

"That's a long rest you'll be taking, woman." Picking up the indignantly yelling woman, Vegeta flew to their 'deserted place'.

O.O

The wind swept up the red dirt, swirling it around and around in a merry chase of ring around the roses. Well, considering that song's about the plague, doesn't that make for nice imagery? Little wind demons cackled their heads off as they pushed tumbleweeds around haphazardly.

It was in this scene that Bulma and Vegeta had landed. If they'd landed on another scene a paragraph wouldn't have been wasted describing this one.

Setting the still-screeching woman on the ground, Vegeta stepped back and grimaced, trying to relieve his ringing ears.

"-and another thing, Mr. Saiyan Prince, if you even think that I'm going to hold any type of sympathy for you that will force me to unwillingly sleep with your sexy self let me tell you, you are quite wrong!"

Vegeta's ears perked up, not literally of course, "You think I'm sexy?"

Bulma rolled her eyes, mentally cursing her slip of tongue. Curse Freud! "Every woman in the world thinks you're sexy right now, Vegeta!"

Vegeta pointed a finger in the air triumphantly. He stared at the finger, brought it to his mouth, wet it, and stuck it back in the air. "Northeasterly wind- Ah ha! But you aren't supposed to be one of those women!" He lowered the finger, "Are you one of those women?" He managed to avoid that double 'wuh' sound this time.

"Um, no. Not really." Did she have to sound so disappointed?

"Oh." Did he have to sound so disappointed?

Did they have to share the same thought without realizing it? Quickly, before the mood of the plot changed from humor to angst, Vegeta approached the woman and the gun she held. "You remember what to do?"

Bulma rolled her eyes, "Sure Vegeta, I simply press the red button and we all go 'boom'."

Vegeta smirked, lightly tracing a finger over the gun and bringing it a bit too close for comfort to the red button. "Well, that would take care of the problem, and it would be your own fault for putting a self-destruct button on this 'DeWomanizer'."

Bulma smacked his hand away. "Okay smarty-pants, let's see you handle this. Your problem, your task."

Vegeta smirked and took the gun carefully from the woman's hand, accidentally brushing her hand as he did so. Both mentally sighed with regret. Aw, jeez, there comes the angst….

"Where do I aim it?"

"How about that big ugly Martian behind you?"

Vegeta whirled around to curse at Bulma's laughter behind him. He turned back around to glare at her, "That wasn't funny."

"Yes, it was! You should have seen the look on your face!"

Vegeta huffed, bringing out his lower lip in a pout that was just too cute. Right then, a bird flew overhead, dropping a nice pile of poop right on the outstretched lip.

Vegeta said a not-very-nice word that begins with 'f' and rhymes with duck, wiping his lip and spitting as Bulma laughed uproariously. "Shut up!" He suddenly got a thoughtful look on his face and looked upwards, smacking his lips. "Hmm, tastes like chicken!"

Bulma made a face, "Will you just push the button?"

Vegeta nodded, then went stark white in horror as he looked behind Bulma, "G-gods! They're here!"

Bulma scoffed and rolled her eyes, "Please, Vegeta! I'm not going to fall for that 'look behind you' trick like you did! I'm not that-"

"Hey! Vegeta! You can't just have Mrs. Spoiled Brat there! You have to take all of us where no woman has gone before!"

Bulma whirled around, an angry retort on her lips; it's better than bird poop, and gaped. There was only one woman coming toward them, so she had no idea what the man had meant by 'they'. The insult, however, that was not to be overlooked. "And who do you think you are? Can't you girls take a hint? Vegeta doesn't want any!"

The girl tilted her head to one side, "He may not, but I do!" With that she turned completely to Vegeta, ignoring Bulma.

Ssjprincess: So, how are you?

Vegeta: O.O! What! What's going on? Why am I speaking like this? Who are you! *glares*

Ssjprincess: *points to name* I'm Ssjprincess. This is the way we always talk.

Vegeta: *folds arms across chest* What are you talking about? I don't even know you!

Ssjprincess: *tosses her hair over her shoulder* Huh! Figures that you would forget we're married!

Bulma, in a regular sort of way, glared at Vegeta. "What? Married! You're married to-her?" She sputtered the last as if it was inconceivable.

Vegeta: No! *looks quite insulted* What do mean by that? You think I can't attract any woman I want? O.O Oh no! Woman! I can't stop speaking this way! HELP ME!

Ssjprincess: *smirks* Don't worry! You'll get used to it! Now, let me have that. *takes the 'DeWomanizer' with seemingly no effort* We don't want you using this little ole thing. *cracks the gun over her knee just as effortlessly*

Vegeta: O.O *glares at Ssjprincess* Onna! *covers mouth with hand* Mm mmph mmph mmph mmph!

Ssjprincess: Huh?

Vegeta: *uncovers mouth* I did not just say that!

Bulma shrieked suddenly, making both of the 'talking' people jump. "That's it! You're all insane, do you realize that?" She stalked over to Ssjprincess, lifting her as easily as Ssjprincess had pilfered the gun. "I spent hours on that! Lost a whole night's sleep! And you are not going to continue to be in this desert with us any more! You're-I don't even know what to call it-is driving me nuts. Although I feel the weird urge to add that it is quite entertaining in your writing."

Ssjprincess: *holds her hand out to Vegeta* Save me from the evil witch, sweet Gold Knight!

Vegeta: O.o; No!

Bulma threw Ssjprincess as far as she could, probably a couple frames from the ending if this were a movie, to make a miraculous recovery and again antagonize our protagonists. Then again, this wasn't a movie.

Vegeta: Th-th-th-tha O.O

Bulma frowned, approaching Vegeta slowly. She paused to glare down at the demolished gun and again watched as Vegeta stuttered over whatever it was he was trying to say. "That's all, folks?"

Vegeta: *glares and folds arms across chest* No! I was trying to say 'thank you'!

Bulma stepped up until she was inches from Vegeta then drew her hand back, slapping the surprised Prince right across the face.

Vegeta held his stinging cheek in one hand, glaring in surprise at the audacity of this woman. "What was that for?"

Bulma shrugged, going back to retrieve the rest of the gun. "You were still talking like that Ssjprincess person. Plus it felt good." She sighed as she looked down at the pieces of her DeWomanizer she held in her arms, "Back to the drawing board, Vegeta. We have to go back to Capsule so I can try to make a new gun and we can again be ambushed and that one destroyed."

Vegeta shook his head adamantly. "No! You'll have to make do with what you've got there! Lightening won't strike the same place twice. I'm not moving from this spot."

Bulma's eyes widened as she stared at some point beyond Vegeta. "Actually the chances of lightening striking the same place are slim, not impossible. And women and lightening are not the same thing."

"Vegeta! I want to glomp you! Can I glomp you? Please? I promise it won't hurt-much."

Vegeta turned with a groan, wishing this three-year period would hurry up and fast-forward to him becoming a Super Saiyan or at least getting some from the wom-whoa! Okay, that thought was a no-no. Spoiler!

It was that JadedBest girl once again, and she was preparing to take a leap both ChiChi and Mrs. Briefs had taken.

"Get away from me!" With a womanly shriek Bruce Campbell would've been proud of, Vegeta leapt right into Bulma's arms, clinging to her as if his very life depended on it. "I don't want you!"

JadedBest paused, a thoughtful look on her face. "Oh, I get it! This is like testing my Willpower, right? Okay, I'm game"

Both Bulma, who was about to drop Vegeta; who knew the man could be so heavy; and Vegeta watched curiously as JadedBest waited for all of about two minutes before breaking out into an insane grin that made both sweatdrop. "Aw, who am I kidding? I have no Willpower! I want you right now! Let go of that spoiled brat and come into a real woman's arms!"

Vegeta landed with an unceremonious thud as Bulma dropped him, stepped over him as he glowered at her and rubbed his sore bottom, and advanced on JadedBest with murderous intent.

JadedBest weighed her options carefully. Either stay and possibly survive a beating from one of the most dangerous women in this world she was now in and perhaps get to glance at Vegeta's butt as he flew away, or strategically relocate and await a chance when the heiress to Capsule Corporation and the meanest temper in the world wasn't so close to her man. Well, considering the cloud of dust that trailed after her, it could correctly be assumed which option she opted for.

Bulma clapped her hands together, brushing away invisible dust from a nonexistent fight and turned around to give out a shrill squeal and jump backwards; Vegeta's face inches from her own.

Vegeta smirked at the reaction he could produce in at least one woman and leaned forward to get the full effect of her fear. Of course, the added benefit of taking in her scent was not unwanted.

Bulma watched with wide eyes as Vegeta's eyes partially closed and his nostrils flared. She couldn't help it. He looked so funny with his nose twitching like that. She laughed.

His eyes snapped open and he glared indignantly at her, "What?"

Bulma held a dainty hand over her mouth, "Nothing. That was just cute."

While Vegeta opened his mouth to go on a tirade about just how 'un-cute' he was, Bulma suddenly leaned forward and gave him a small peck on the cheek. A kiss; not like a chicken!

Vegeta felt his face glow as red as it ever did in a Chuquita fanfiction, which might be added are more funny than this and stranger too.

Bulma smiled, pleased at his reaction. "I liked it."

Vegeta mock-snorted, "Whatever, woman! Just get that thing fixed!"

With a huff that was far from real, Bulma sat down right where she was and conveniently opened up the toolbox she just happened to have on her, bending over and working on the messed up 'De-Womanizer' with Vegeta standing over and circumspectly watching over her.

Knowing men, he was probably looking down her shirt more than he was watching her work.

A/N: JB's here again! And look, Ssjprincess! Whoever shall be next in my torture? You can look at Veg, but you can't have. He's all Bulma's! (cackles madly)

Ssjprincess: See? Your fault! You and those A/N's with Vegeta! Married to him! I hope this 'entertained' you. You and Veg may need some time alone now since you feel so deprived and unloved! (wink) See? I do help!

Meow: ^_^ Thank you! I was laughing myself while I wrote this…. Well, she did come in at the wrong time. Come on…Mrs. Briefs? In her underwear? In front of Vegeta? Bulma had to think the guy was asexual…. Dragonballs? Now, I've always wanted to know how they knew Shenlong was a guy…or Porunga even….

G-G-GGoku: Stuttering? Thanks! The loveable Saiyan may even make an appearance.

Susan: Whoa! Don't bust a gut! Um, no…. This just popped into my head. Impulsive and random. Much scarier that way huh? This is why I PLAN my stories! Heehee, ice cream would be cold on Veggie…. O.o; Don't ask….

Kitten: Can now! FF.net is back up! The next chapter came out now! Heehee Just normal banter escalating up to a fight and them storming out…. Use music? Or go to a restaurant with your notepad and pretend you're Bulma and pretend Vegeta is there and write down what happens? What? I do it all the time…although, not in public places….

Masamune: It's insane, cause I'm insane…. So, you think the whole caravan ganging up on him convinced her? Didn't you just the tree/Launch scene? I have no idea WHERE that came from!

JadedBest: Down, Bessie! Why do you want to lay him out? You don't need to hit him? (innocent blinks) (hits self on head) Sorry, had a 'Goku' moment. Then again, I was blushing like Mirai Trunks…. Nope, it was spontaneous combustion. Sounded familiar? I have no idea what you speak of…. Sorry, but I did plug your story. I didn't mean to make you run from Bulma, but seriously, would you mess with her? If Goku won't, I certainly wouldn't. She even makes your favorite purple-haired Demi-Saiyan flinch! Aww, poor baby!

Mushi_azn: Different name…. Kinda. I have a mailing list, but it's through my email. Just leave your email in your review, unless I've already gotten it…. I've forgotten. No, I guarantee she liked it! Run out of people who WANT Vegeta? Never! But okay, what fantasy do you have of him? I need to get a good idea of your persona…. Gay? Maybe…. Heehee Be afraid, be very afraid.

MistressAlexa: So do I! I have no idea! Thanks! I've read something like this by a girl names Vegetas Goddess called Temptation Awaits…. Her and Chuquita were inspiration….

SkittleKicks: Jeez, you're mean! I can join the Master Roshi's of the world! No nosebleeds here though…. Good point…. Parody time? Heehee Anyways, I think the reviewers are becoming more a problem than the real characters! O.o

Moonsaiyanprincess: Glad you liked!

Good? Or disturbing? What? Come on, besides yaoi, what do you guys want me to do with (not to) Vegeta?

O.O