Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction ❯ MST3K Saiyajin Style ❯ ...'til the point of no return ( Chapter 1 )

MST3K Saiyajin Style!~

Chapter 1 - ...'til the point of no return~

My deepest apologies to Roselyne Marot. This story belongs to her. I would have been happier having never read it. Anyways... this is an MST (another author's fic with my comments). MST3K stands for Mystery Science Theater 3000, just FYI. And the MSTers are Vegeta, Gohan (adult), Mirai Trunks, and Yamcha. Anyways, on with the fic!

~*~*~

> ... 'til the point of no return

Gohan: Um... was that the title?

Yamcha: Apparently.

> By Roselyne Marot

>

> "Why do you make that to people", asked Chichi as Juuhachigou

> was close to her.

Vegeta: Huh?

Gohan: Man, mom's grammar has really gone downhill!

> "Dr Gero's dead. Your program..."

Yamcha: You know, the soap opera? Well, before he died, he forgot to tape it. Sorry.

> "It's our program... Or simply fun, I don't know"

Yamcha: Fun!

Trunks and Gohan: WHEE!

Vegeta: Stop it.

> replied Juuhachigou as she hit Chichi on the side of her throat.

Vegeta: ...with a rubber chicken. Why, I don't know.

Gohan: Or with a fish...

Trunks: Don't even go there!

Yamcha: Monty Python!!!

> Gohan turned into super saiya-jin

Yamcha: Um... isn't it `Saiyajin'?

Vegeta: *Flatly* Yes.

Gohan: Maybe super saiya-jin is a totally different thing that I turned into... because you don't `turn into Super Saiyajin', you `go Super Saiyajin'...

Trunks: Then... we can assume that a super saiya-jin is a totally different alien race, I guess.

> and attacked her but she sent him a knee into his midriff.

Gohan: *Impersonating a mailman* Package for Mr. Midriff!

Yamcha: *Guy who gets the mail* Oh look, my knee arrived! At last!

Trunks: Right... I'm going over here now... *Does the `Li' walk to the other side of the theater*

> He realized he couldn't breath

Gohan: It may have been because of the missing `e' at the end of that word.

> and everything was going darker and darker. He fell on the floor,

> his hair returning to his normal color, his eyes expressionless.

Trunks: Yes, his eyes weren't making strange faces any more.

Gohan: Now _you're_ getting weird.

> Goku was still, he knew he couldn't do anything :

Gohan: Except put unnecessary spaces before colons.

> every times

Yamcha: Every times... that's grammatically incorrect, right?

Trunks: *Stares at him* How on earth did you learn what that means?!

Yamcha: Well... Gohan says stuff like that all the time...

> he had tried to hit the cyborgs, he had passed through them as if

> they didn't exist... as if *he* didn't exist, he corrected, as he

> remembered than Trunks also passed through him when he

> attacked the cyborgs.

Gohan: So... Father's a hologram now...?

Yamcha: Psychedelic, man!

> And now, Trunks was the only one left,

Yamcha and Gohan: *Singing* Ooooone is the loneliest number that you'll ever know!!

Vegeta: Stop that. Now.

Trunks: *Edges further away*

> still held by Juuhanagou

Trunks: Um... it's Juunanagou. N, not H.

> who was keeping his catch on Trunks's wrist, twisting his

> forearm.

Yamcha: Keeping his _catch_ on Trunks's wrist? Making it sound like he was dating Trunks's wrist or something.... or putting his date _on_ Trunks's wrist.

Gohan: That sentence was _totally_ off.

Trunks: I'm confused.

> Trunks couldn't move, watching his friends being killed by his

> loathed enemies. Couldn't move... because of Juuhanagou's catch

> that was giving him terrible pain every times he has tried to

> move

Yamcha: Man, his girlfriend must have been _fat_ to cause you that much pain, Trunks.

Trunks: I have no idea what you're talking about.

Gohan: Ok, now _I'm_ confused.

Vegeta: Just smile and nod.

> he couldn't even use his sword to cut his arm, in last solution,

Gohan: *Flatly* In last solution?

Yamcha: You know, I have completely lost track of the storyline...

Vegeta: I think I hear the toilet running... *Begins to leave the theater*

Trunks: *Drags him back* Oh, no, you don't.

Gohan: And when put with the previous sentence, it says `giving him terrible pain every times he has tried to move he couldn't even use his sword to cut his arm, in last solution'. THAT IS RANDOM SKIPPING OF TENSE! It's also a RUN-ON!!

Trunks: Anyone have a tranquilizer...?

Yamcha: I wish....

> as the hand that was holding the sword was at the end of the

> caught arm. Every movements he had tried since Juuhanagou

> caught him has been ended in hard to stand pain.

Gohan: Now, how would that sentence be diagrammed...?

Trunks: Don't you ever give up?

> It seems that Juuhanagou knew some ancestral techniques

> belonged to the body's vital points -

Yamcha: His technique belonged to, like, the heart and lungs or something?

Trunks: Something along those lines...

Gohan: Heart, lungs, liver, kidney...

Vegeta: What are you doing?

Gohan: Organ recital.

Yamcha: Ooooh... That hurts!

> Or perhaps the reason he couldn't move was simply because of

> the fear... He was going to be killed, he has no doubt of it... And

> his mission would be a failure... All his hopes - all his future's

> hopes -

Yamcha: What, pray tell, was his future hoping for?

Gohan: Correct usage of apostrophes, perhaps.

> would be reduced to void... in a few seconds.

Trunks: This girl likes using ellipses way too much.

> The fear was too high now that he realized he was the only one

> left and that the ki ball that Juuhanagou had prepared in his right

> hand for Gohan - before Juuhachigou killed him - was still there.

Yamcha: It's the Ki Ball That Would Not Die!!

> With a graceful movement, Juuhanagou turned to him and placed

> his right hand with the ki-ball against Trunks's midriff.

Trunks: Does she have a problem with using `stomach'?

Vegeta: She likes making people get wounded there. Whatever happened to a good punch in the face?

Trunks: Poppa....

> Trunks doubled over when the ki-ball touched him, but with a

> feline movement, Juuhanagou released his wrist and went behind

> him, touching rapidly his spine

Gohan: What.... on.... Earth.... did.... you just say....?

Trunks: `Touching rapidly his spine', apparently.

Yamcha: That makes sense if you hit your head a couple of times... maybe squint a little and tilt your head slightly.... and then go drink a lot of sake....

> at two places before his hand raised to the back of his neck. His

> right hand was still pressing against Trunks's midriff,

Gohan: Not stomach.

> his left arm passed over Trunks's shoulder and his left hand

> under his tank on his chest in a near-caress, holding "tenderly"

> Trunks against him.

Yamcha: The new Tenderly Trunks doll is available at toy stores everywhere! Rush out and buy yours today!

Trunks: *Gives him a weird look*

> There has been no scream or loud sounds, just the sounds of

> steps and movement...

Gohan: Again with the tense mistakes!

Trunks: I've been confused for a while now...

Vegeta: For how long?

Trunks: Since about the title...

> Goku, behind Juuhanagou, couldn't see exactly how Trunks was

> hurt, he didn't really want to know, as he knew

Gohan: Unnecessary comma!

Trunks: Ok! Stop it! We all see the unnecessary commas!

Gohan: Good.

> than the young warrior was going to die even if he tried

> anything... He could just hear Trunks rapidly gasping for breath,

> and then his breathings

Gohan: Breathings...?

Trunks: I don't think that's even in the dictionary...

> get more and more spaced out, as if he was calming down... as if

> he was dying... Goku didn't want to hear or see anything more,

> but he couldn't go anywhere else.

Gohan: Apparently, he couldn't see the door that everyone was coming in through.

Vegeta: Kakarotto is such an idiot...

> There was no other place to go that this house where they had

> previously taken refuge,

Gohan: That this house. It sounds like the house just did something...

Yamcha: *Imitating a mother* Oooh, look at the cute little thing that this house just did!

> thinking that the cyborgs would never find them there...

Vegeta: They had naturally forgotten that Juuhachigou and Juunanagou could read energy signals.

> They had been wrong,

Vegeta: Of course they had.

> and during the night, as Goku was sleeping, he had been awaken

Gohan: ...ed

> by a strange noise outside... And then, the two cyborgs had

> appeared... They didn't want to kill the others, but as they tried to

> protect Goku, they all died. The next one would be him, lying

> down unconscious on the bed.

Vegeta: NO!!! ONLY I CAN KILL KAKAROTTO!!!

Trunks: Poppa... calm yourself....

> "It's so strange", Goku thought,

Gohan: What is? That you're using quote marks for thoughts? Yes, that is rather strange...

Trunks: Aren't you supposed to use the single ones rather than the double ones?

Gohan: Yep.

> "to be here, standing, and to see myself there. My soul and body

> has

Gohan: Using two nouns and a singular linking verb...

Yamcha: You're thinking too much... it's making my head hurt...

> apparently already been separated. It won't change a lot that they

> kill my body."

Vegeta: If your soul isn't in your body, you're usually considered dead.

Trunks: Goku doesn't think so...

Vegeta: Kakarotto doesn't think _period_.

> A terrible thought came to his mind :

Gohan: ...as he put an extra space in front of a colon...

> "If they didn't... If they didn't try to protect me, they would still

> be alive. And Gohan, Trunks and Vegeta would have together

> been one day ready to destroy them... If only I had died facing

> #19, they would still be alive..."

Yamcha: Nooo... because then #19 would have proceeded to kill the rest of us.

Vegeta: Speak for yourself.

> And then he get a terrible feeling :

Gohan: ...as he put an extra space in front of a colon AND confused tense once more...

> suddenly he could feel what Trunks, in his last moments, was

> feeling.

Yamcha: Ouchies. Sword through the chest feelings.

> It was an horrible

Gohan: A horrible. A.

> sensation adding more to the remorses Goku had.

Yamcha: I thought you could make remorse plural without the `s'.

Gohan: You do. Remorses isn't in the dictionary either.

> He saw Trunks's arms falling on his side, lifeless, and afterwards,

> Trunks's whole body completely slackened, the only reason he

> was still standing was because Juuhanagou was still holding him.

Yamcha: I _told_ you he was a Tenderly Trunks doll.

> "NOOOOO !! YOU HAVE NOT THE RIGHT !!!

Gohan: When did we switch to Shakespeare...?

> WHY DO YOU DO THAT ?!!" Goku screamed.

Gohan: And we left Shakespeare just as quickly as we came.

Yamcha: Suits me just fine.

Trunks: Shouldn't it be "Why _did_ you do that," since he had already done it...?

> Even if he has no real body and was passing through everybody,

Gohan: I think that's a record for World's Fastest Tense Change.

> like a ghost,

> Juuhanagou seemed to hear him. He smiled to him over his

> shoulder.

Trunks: Just like an ad on a `Crest' commercial!

> "What the heck does he... ?" Goku thought.

Gohan: *Goku* What the heck do _I_ think I'm doing, putting my thoughts in quotes?

> ********

> As he didn't feel any pain, Trunks decided not to move, and stay

> in this dark and soft place. He realized that when Juuhanagou hit

> him with his ki-ball, he didn't really have felt pain...

Gohan: Yes, his pain wasn't felt. It was more like... satin.

> just fall into this dark world. Was it *that*, to die ? It's when he

> felt water drops falling on his face that he realized what was

> happening.

Gohan: *Flares Super Saiyajin* STOP WITH THE TENSE SKIPPING ALREADY!!

Trunks and Yamcha: *Edge away*

> "Oh, CRAP !" he screamed, or at least, thought so...

Gohan: Unnecessary comma number-....

Trunks: *Groans* Gohan, please...

> He opened his eyes suddenly and tried to raise his arms to

> protect him from the wave of water he was expecting.

Gohan: It's not like you're laying under Niagara Falls, kid.

> The wave of fury took him before he could do anything,

> surrounding him, playing with him,

Yamcha: *Makes a face* You mean the fury was...

Gohan: Yamcha... *Hits him* Don't go there.

Yamcha: *Winces* I was just SAYING....

> treating him badly. He kept his breathing and try to swim to

> reach to surface.

Gohan: Swim? He was only hit with a few drops of water...

Vegeta: He's swimming in his fury.

Gohan: *Blinks*

Vegeta: Remember the wave of fury that hit him?

Gohan: Oh yeah...

Trunks: I've never thought of fury as a liquid, personally...

Yamcha: What else would it be? A gas?

Trunks: ....I don't know. I don't think about it on a regular basis.

Gohan: Point. Is fury animal, vegetable, or mineral? Let's have a show of hands...

> He knew he was a good swimmer,

Trunks: When did I have time to learn? I spent my entire life hiding from the androids!

> but in this *kind* of water, perhaps swimming had no use...

Gohan: Fury Water! The new rage for swimming pools!

Yamcha: Fury Water? What does it do, bite you whenever you do a cannonball into it?

Vegeta: Probably...

> As he tried to move, he felt an horrible

Gohan: I told you before, it's _A_ horrible! A!!!!

Trunks: Please, Gohan.... just smile and nod....

> pain through his whole body. As he screamed, he released most

> of the air from his lungs.

All four: Duh.

> *********

> Goku saw a movement from Trunks, and afterwards he heard

> him screaming.

> *He's not dead !* he thought with a light of hope.

Gohan: Hey... that sounds like the title of a bad B Science Fiction movie!

Yamcha: *Ominously* THE LIGHT OF HOPE IS COMING! BEWARE!

Trunks: You people are scaring me...

Vegeta: SHUT UP ALREADY!!

Gohan: We can't help it. Reflex.

Yamcha: The Light of Hope is at your door with the Ki Ball That Would Not Die to steal your honey!

Gohan: No, that's heffulumps and woozles.

Yamcha: You mean elephants and weasels.

Gohan: That's what I said! Heffulumps and woozles!

Vegeta: If they break into song again, I'm going to rip these seats up out of the floor and pound the brats with them.

Trunks: Poppa, don't....

Gohan: There was also another unnecessary space between `dead' and the exclamation point.

Yamcha: Unnecessary Space: Light of Hope 2!

Vegeta: THAT'S IT! *Begins pulling the seats up*

Trunks: POPPA!!!

> *... Yet... * another voice in the back of his mind said.

Vegeta: Yet... that means that there's still hope, right?

Trunks: *Sighs* I feel so unloved...

Vegeta: You _were_ a mistake, Trunks.

Trunks: ....I WAS NOT!

Vegeta: But you _could_ have been.

> Juuhanagou was still holding him against him.

Yamcha: He really loves his Tenderly Trunks doll...

Trunks: You're weird and that's freaking me out. Stop it.

> He raised his left hand from Trunks's chest to his face, pressing

> his hand on Trunks's mouth and nose, and leaning Trunks's head

> against him.

Yamcha: ...EW! Oh, that's _sick_!!!

Gohan: *Groans* Yamcha....

Yamcha: Well, it _is_!

Vegeta: I doubt the rest of us would have even thought of that if you hadn't called our attention to it...

> *********

> Trunks felt water coming into his mouth and lungs.

Gohan: So he's drowning in _Android_ Water, not Fury Water.

Trunks: Fury Water would be a great name for a rock band....

> He desperately tried to cough it out of him,

Yamcha: As opposed to... coughing it out of someone else?

> and then he let go what the remaining air left he got.

Gohan: And then our dialect went ghetto and the audience had no clue what was going on.

> The pain was paralyzing him, and he couldn't fight against this

> wave. He knew in the deep of his mind, that it was not a normal

> wave... Not at all...

Yamcha: It was an Android Wave!

Trunks: Android Wave: Fury Water's first hit single!

> Every time he had tried to move, the pain was so high that he

> had each time wished to die.

Vegeta: And then he realized that he had. Hell's not all it's cracked up to be, is it, kid?

Gohan: I thought Hell was filled with _fire_, not _water_...

Vegeta: I've been to Hell, remember?

Yamcha: No, _you've_ been to the HFIL.

Trunks: HFIL...?

Yamcha: *Hiding from Vegeta while Gohan restrains him* Home for Infinite Losers.

Trunks: Ah, ok...

> "He has hit me at special points. That's why it's so painful. How

> the heck does he know about this technique ?

Gohan: *Opens his mouth to say something*

Trunks: We get it! We get it! Everyone see the unnecessary space?

Yamcha and Vegeta: *Bored* Yes, we all see the unnecessary space.

> He never used it in the future..."

> *********

> Juuhanagou could feel Trunks struggling to fight, struggling to

> live, even if this fight was less and less effective. Juuhanagou

> realized that *this* was even more enjoyable than blasting

> somebody at a distance point.

Gohan: Not *that*, but *this*!!

Yamcha: Yeah, *that* totally sucks!

> He would have to use this technique more often. But this one

> was special.

Yamcha: Special *cough*ed*cough*

Trunks: HEY!

Yamcha: *Innocent smile*

> He sensed Trunks twisting to get out from his catch and he held

> him even more tight.

Gohan: Tighter.... TIGHTER!!! *Growls*

Trunks: *Whacks Yamcha before he can even think about saying something*

> Trunks tried to move his head to released

Gohan: Someone tell the author to take at least one English class...

> himself from Juuhanagou's hand, but Juuhanagou pressed his

> head even more close to him.

Yamcha: Not going to say it...

Trunks: You'd better not.

> *********

> "He prevents me to move and breathe" realized Trunks,

Gohan: That statement was so...

Yamcha: Redundant?

Gohan: No... just very off.

> still into the water. He decided to go beyond the pain, and moved

> his arm to his face. The pain was totally awful, but he managed

> to catch something before his face : Juuhanagou's arm. He

> recognized what it was, even if he didn't see them,

Gohan: He recognized the single arm even though he didn't see them. He also recognized the same colon mistake and screamed, "HEY, AUTHOR! GET YOUR COLON AND SPACINGS RIGHT!!"

Yamcha: Someone's touchy today...

Trunks: *Looks back and forth between Gohan and Vegeta* Which one?

Yamcha: Pick one.

> and tried to pull it away from him, his nails tracing bloody lines

> in the artificial flesh

Trunks: Last time I checked, the androids didn't bleed.

Vegeta: I don't think the author's paying attention to detail any more.

> as he lost his catch and then recover

Gohan: ...ed.

> it.

> **********

> "Let him go !!" Goku screamed, as he flew to Juuhanagou,

Gohan: *Twitches* Someone remove the comma key from this girl's keyboard...

> moving his fist directly to the cyborg's head... and passing

> through it...

Gohan: Father... you're a hologram, remember? I thought we had already established that...

> He landed on the other side and turned to face Juuhanagou. Bad

> idea, he realized, as now he was facing Trunks and see the

> desperate look in his eyes,

Yamcha: A look that said `There _must_ be a way to lose 50 pounds in 50 days!!'

Trunks: I still don't know what's going on...

> and the pain and sweat on his face. He had just heard sounds and

> receive feelings from where he was. Now he had to face the view

> of it. He turned his eyes from Trunks to Juuhanagou.

> "Let him go ! ... And take me instead !"

Yamcha: *Eyebrows shoot up* Whoa!

Gohan and Trunks: *Whack him in unison*

> Juuhanagou raised his eyes to him, and Goku thought that the

> cyborg was considering the proposition. But then Juuhanagou

> made a mock face. "It's not a bargain, I'll get you afterwards."

Gohan: *Goku* All right, all right... Let him go and you can kill me _and_ you'll get this handy little contraption! It slices! It dices! It makes Julian Fries! It's a miracle worker!

Trunks: *Juunanagou* Hmm... maybe I could.... NO! No. I'll get you later still.

> Goku considered Trunks again. "He is NOT your target. I am !

> LET HIM GO !!!" Goku screamed.

> Juuhanagou had a soft laugh,

Yamcha: And then he had a brandy nightcap.

> and then returned his attention to his victim who was no longer

> struggling but instead used his catch on the artificial arm to hold

> on to.

Gohan: This girl has a real problem with using the words `stomach' and `grip'.

Yamcha: That's a weird quirk to have. Hey... that's a fun word! Quirk quirk quirk quirk...

Trunks: Yeah, and if you say it too much it comes out `quack' and people start calling you `Duck-Man' for the rest of your life.

Yamcha: How would you...

Trunks: IT WASN'T MY FAULT, OK?! IT WAS A DARE!!

Yamcha: Oooook... I'm just going to go to the other side of the theater now... *Backs off*

Trunks: I hate that stupid word...

> ***********

> Trunks began to see stars before his eyes.

Gohan: *Trunks* Ooooh.... pretty colors!

Yamcha: No, he started to see _stars_! Julia Roberts... Cameron Diaz... Kevin Bacon...

Gohan: Kevin Bacon?

Yamcha: Well... maybe not him... but there's always Brittany Spears...

All four: *Collective shudder*

> He was slowly dying, by one of the most horrible way.

Yamcha: Last time I checked, `way' wasn't plural.

Gohan: What we have here is a failure to communicate!

> The water was all around him nearly solid.

Gohan: You'd think it would be liquid...

Yamcha: Gee... solid water...

Trunks: Ice, in other words.

Vegeta: Wouldn't it have been easier to say `He was in ice'?

Gohan: Bad fic authors never take shortcuts. I read one where it took three sentences for the guy to say that he would need 3 senzu beans to be healed after something. I couldn't follow _that_ storyline either.

Trunks: I'm still lost!

Yamcha: Have you tried Hare Krishna?

Trunks: *Groans and slaps his forehead*

> But he didn't care where the current was leading him, the water

> was not the problem.

Gohan: Yes, Android Water is never a problem!

Trunks: Unless, of course, you're drowning in it. Then it poses some problems.

Yamcha: Most things that people are dying in do.

> He had heard that people dying of drowning were conscious

> during a long time.

All four: Huh?

Gohan: That sentence was _totally_ out to lunch...

Trunks: Can we get on with this?

Yamcha: Why do you _want_ to?

Trunks: So I can get away from you people.

> And even if this water was not real, he knew that the one

> responsible of this wouldn't let him go.

Gohan: The one responsible of this story doesn't speak English as her first language.

> He had still a long time before to dye

Yamcha: Dye what? His hair?

Gohan: Maybe his sister's boyfriend's hair some weird color... like... Royal Amethyst Banana.

Vegeta: That's not even a color.

Gohan: Hey, I'm not responsible of that.

> and he never realized how suffocating could be horrible.

All four: Surprise!

> As Juuhanagou would never let him go, perhaps he would accept

> to do him another favor...

Trunks: As if he ever did one in the first place.

> "Kill... me..."

Vegeta: Hey... maybe if he kills him, the story will be over faster!

Trunks: POPPA!

> ***********

> Juuhanagou felt Trunks having convulsions and falling. He put a

> knee on the ground to follow him.

Gohan: So... he put a knee on the ground? What'd he do, take it out of his pocket?

Yamcha: Go, Fido! Sic `em!

Gohan: Follow, Yamcha, follow. Not attack.

Yamcha: The Knee Strikes Back: Light of Hope 3.

> Goku perceived Trunks's thought,

Gohan: So.... Father had ESP now...?

Vegeta: He got that along with Instant Transmission on the planet Yardrak.

Yamcha: ....whee?

> and considered the alternative. He wasn't able to fight the cyborg.

> The only thing he could do was negotiating with him.

Yamcha: Yeah... I've had days where the only thing I could do was negotiating with someone.

> He had never been very gifted for this.

Vegeta: He had never been very gifted for anything, but that's beside the point.

> He *had* to improve himself... RIGHT NOW !

Gohan: CAPITAL and unnecessary space.

Yamcha: Operators are standing by! Right now! Do you hear? NOW NOW NOW!

Trunks: What's the number... 1-800-BAD-TALE?

Yamcha: That works.

> "Why are you doing this to him ?" he asked Juuhanagou with a

> terrified and sad voice. "If you decided to kill him, why don't

> you finishing him off RIGHT NOW,

Gohan: Yeah, why don't you finishing him off right now?

Yamcha: RIGHT NOW!! NOW NOW NOW! The number is 1-800-...

Vegeta: Stop that.

Yamcha: No it's not... that doesn't fit...

Vegeta: No, I mean stop that. Your voice is echoing.

Yamcha: I'm not responsible of that.

Trunks: I'm beginning to figure out this storyline... and I don't like it very much....

> instead of torturing him as you're doing ? What will it bring more

> to you what you're doing now ?"

Yamcha: What'd he say?

> Juuhanagou considered him a moment, and then smiled,

> returning his attention to Trunks. Holding him nearly tenderly

> against him,

Yamcha: Tenderly Trunks dolls! Quick, they're going fast!.

> he approached his mouth of Trunks's hear and closed his eyes,

> and spoke softly...

Yamcha: ...and said `Excuse me, is this your hear?'

Trunks: What's a hear?

Gohan: You know... it's right over there by your smell.

> ***********

> Trunks didn't even suspect such a feeling would exist. He had

> suspect he would one day die in a fight, and that the last thing he

> would have felt would be an ultimate pain... but not *this*.

Gohan: Nope, he was expecting *that*!

Yamcha: Because *that*, once again, totally sucks.

> He had suspect that when he would die, the thought he would

> have would be "I want to live !"... He didn't imagine that he

> would feel *that*,

Gohan: Ok, you want *this* or *that*?! Make up your mind!!

> that he'd prefer to die instead of agonizing like that... Perhaps

> that he wasn't worthy of the royal blood of Vegetasei...

Vegeta: Vegeta-sei. There's a dash there.

> He wondered how his father would react when he would learn

> about his death. He felt regret filling his heart and soul... But

> nevertheless, he repeated his wish inthought :

Gohan: NO! She used up all her spaces by putting them in front of colons, exclamation points, and question marks!!

Trunks: Ummm... Gohan... are you ok?

Yamcha: He's about to hyperventilate...

> "Please... Kill... me... now..."

Yamcha: That's almost a song waiting to happen!

Trunks: Yes... please kill me now and get me _out_ of this pointless story! THAT I STILL HAVEN'T FIGURED OUT!

> And then he heard a soft voice that he recognized immediately.

Yamcha: James Cagney?

Trunks: Soft voice. Soft being the key word.

> ***********

> "Some things are too beautiful to be destroyed..." Juuhanagou

> told with a soft voice. Goku stared at him. Juuhanagou

> continued : "... until the point of no-return."

Yamcha: Oooh! Oooh! I recognize that! That's the title!!

Vegeta: Where did Juuhachigou go?

> "What are you talking about ?" Goku asked, eyes widened, with

> an unease feeling in the back of his neck.

Gohan: And then Juunanagou directed him to a good chiropractor.

Yamcha: He had an unease feeling?

Gohan: He's not responsible of that.

Yamcha: We're also making too many Light of Hope jokes.

Trunks: We aren't responsible of that, either.

> Juuhanagou opened his eyes and glare at him a moment, then he

> turn his eyes away and watch a distant point.

Gohan: Hey... look at that point!

Vegeta: Where?

Gohan: The distant one.

> "When you love or respect somebody... The more intense thing

> you can do, is to kill him - or her - ... but very slowly, so that you

> can feel that person's life slowly going away, and passing

> through yourself.

Gohan: *Opens his mouth to say something*

Trunks, Yamcha, and Vegeta: *Bored* Unnecessary comma.

> You possess totally this person...

Gohan: That statement confused totally me.

Trunks: So... I'm about to die... but then I'm somewhere else drowning in Android Water?

Gohan: Basically. But that was redundant.

Trunks: And off.

> you are the point of no return...".

Yamcha: The Point of No Return: Light of Hope 4!

Gohan: There are going to be more Light of Hope movies than Rocky movies at this rate.

> Juuhanagou looked back to Trunks, and continued to speak

> softly : "I am *his* point of no return...".

Vegeta: Can't he just say he's gonna kill him and leave it at that?

Gohan: Nonsense! Where's the poetry in that?

> Goku stared at him, his eyes wide, totally surprised by this

> illogical answer.

Vegeta: Yeah, Kakarotto _never_ thinks illogically.

> He'd like to thing that Juuhanagou was feeling only respect for

> Trunks, but the way he was holding him...

Yamcha: That is one abused Tenderly Trunks doll.

Gohan: I'd like to thing that this story is almost over.

> ***********

> The sensation was still horrible,

Gohan: As opposed to...?

Yamcha: Pleasant? Fuzzy?

Trunks: I expected it to get better?

> and Trunks couldn't even breathe

Gohan: With an `e' this time!

> the water to accelerate his death, as Juuhanagou was preventing

> him to breath anything...

Yamcha: That's funny... usually one is prevented _from_ doing something.

Gohan: In this case, breathing with an `e'.

Yamcha: What, you expect the `e' to breathe alone?

Vegeta: How, oh mighty author, does one `breath'?

Trunks: The same way as one `takes a breathe'.

Vegeta: Well I'm certainly glad we cleared THAT up.

> He realized ironically that he was going to die in the arms of a

> boy he had swear to kill... during his whole life.

All four: He had swear?

Yamcha: And then Bulma showed up and knocked the stuffing out of him for swearing!

Trunks: Please... I'm going to have weird enough dreams as it is...

> And then, he viewed rapidly the content of his short life.

Yamcha: ...using the handy index at the end.

Gohan: Alphabetized for your convenience.

Trunks: _My_ convenience?

Gohan: Well, it was the content of _your_ short life that you viewed rapidly.

> After that view, he realized that he never did anything really

> useful in his whole life...

Vegeta: His father was so ashamed and disowned him, laughing hysterically and screaming, `I'm free! I'm free! Hahahaha!'

> Even his trip in the past wouldn't have helped anybody, as the

> result would be the same... Or even worse, as Gohan was also

> dead, and then, in the future, the young Trunks wouldn't have no

> sempai, and no way to learn how to fight properly... And no one

> would defend the Earth against those jerks...

Yamcha: But, on the bright side, he _did_ have the nifty Swiss Army Knife he won at the fair!

> ************

> Goku felt Trunks's ki decreasing more and more, becoming

> hardly perceivable. He had no time to loose.

Yamcha: Time on the Loose: Light of Hope 5!

> "You're wrong !" Goku yelled, trembling. " I never heard

> something more stupid in my whole life ! When you love

> somebody, the only thing that's important to you is that that

> person is fine and safe, that that person doesn't suffer ! You even

> sacrifice your life for that person !!"

Yamcha: I've heard something more stupid in my whole life. Anybody ever heard the Water Buffalo Song?

Gohan: It's also stupid that 5 spaces gave their lives unnecessarily for that statement.

> Silence...

Gohan and Yamcha: *Singing* Echo the sounds of silence...

Vegeta: *Begins pulling up chairs again*

> Goku continued with a low voice, fist clenched : "you don't kill

> that person."

Gohan: A capital Y gave its life so that that sentence could live...

Yamcha: What do you want us to do, hold a funeral for it?

Trunks: It would probably be more interesting than this fic.

> Juuhanagou was fixing Goku, his eyes wide, and a surprised look

> on his face. Goku felt hope for Trunks.

Gohan: Felt hope... well, that's easier to make than silk hope... felt doesn't have to be hemmed.

Yamcha: No no no, Felt Hope is Fury Water's second hit single!

Trunks: I thought Felt Hope was Bob Hope's daughter...

> It was perhaps not too late for him...

> "Release him", he murmured.

> *************

> Trunks had stopped to hope, he didn't even resist to the flow of

> water.

Gohan and Yamcha: *Singing* STOP! In the name of hope! Before you break my heart!

Trunks: *Preventing Vegeta from pulling up any more chairs*

> No, he had one hope left : that it would be over very soon.

Gohan: What, this fic?

All four: YAY!

Trunks: Don't we all...

> "I have... lead ...this... world... to... its end..." was Trunks's last

> thought.

Yamcha: He thinks like John Wayne?

> He felt, or perhaps, imagine, tears ...

Gohan: Felt! It's all the rage!

Trunks: Because it doesn't have to be hemmed.

Yamcha: New! Felt Tenderly Trunks dolls!

Gohan: I've never felt a Tenderly Trunks doll and I don't think I'll ever want to...

> *************

> After a moment, Juuhanagou smiled to Goku : "Very strange...

> Your human ways..."

Yamcha: Take me to your leader.

> Goku startled, feeling hope leaving him,

All four: Bye, Hope.

Yamcha: Don't let the door hit `cha on the butt on the way out.

> as he also perceive Trunks's thought.

> "What do you mean ?"

> He realized afterwards.

Yamcha: ...you just can't lose 50 pounds in 50 days.

> Then he continued : "You're perhaps a cyborg... but you were

> human before ! You cannot forget that !

Yamcha: Forget what?

Gohan: I forgot.

> Please..."

> Juuhanagou looked at Trunks and then at Goku. He could still

> feel the youth's heartbeat... weak and irregular... but still there...

> The cyborg smiled gently : "you're right...". At that time, Goku

> thought that the youth's life was saved.

Vegeta: He was, of course...

All four: Wrong.

> But then, Juuhanagou's smile became mischievous as he

> continued : "... *were* human....".

> And then he abruptly turned Trunks's head on one side. The

> youth opened slightly his eyes...

Yamcha: He named his eyes?

Gohan: What's worse, he named them `Slightly'?

Trunks: I wonder if Juunanagou's knee is still running around...

> No scream, no gasp... Just a soft sound from Trunks's neck.

Yamcha: His neck was singing `New York, New York'.

> Silence...

Gohan: Yes, but was it _echoing_ silence?

Yamcha: Isn't Echo the name of a dolphin?

> ******************

> Silence, all around him. The water had stopped to move.

Gohan: Move what? The furniture?

Yamcha: How does one stop to move?

Vegeta: The same way one breaths and one `takes a breathe', I suppose. But I'm not responsible of that.

> It was now very calm... Trunks didn't feel anymore the

> suffocating sensation...

Trunks: I don't feel anymore my butt. I've been sitting here too long.

> He didn't give a darn, either ...

Trunks: I do too! It's my butt!

> So quiet, and yet ... so strange...

> No more sounds...

Yamcha: Which explains why it's so quiet.

> He relaxed as he realized he wasn't feeling the pain anymore...

> He wasn't breathing...

Gohan: Was that with or without an `e'?

Yamcha: There you go again, making the poor `e' breath on its own....

> But didn't really feel the need... Why would he breathe ?

Gohan: I don't know... maybe the small little factor of getting oxygen into his system?

Yamcha: He was stabbed up on page 12. We are now on page 43. You'd think he'd be dead by now.

Trunks: I'm not dead. I'm feeling better.

> He felt himself falling more deeply into the water... in a place

> deeper, and darker...

> He didn't resist ... And let himself sink into the depths of

> darkness...

Gohan: My, she has an excellent vocabulary when it comes to descriptive adjectives.

> ...where the sound...

> ... and the rhythm...

> ... disappear...

Yamcha: *Singing* And the beat doesn't go on...

> ********************

Gohan: Those little star lines keep changing in length, I've noticed...

> Silence, all around them ...

> Juuhachigou lifted an eyebrow, surprised.

Yamcha: I never would have thought of that... I lift weights...

> Goku was still...

Vegeta: Still....? Still what? Still annoying? Still life?

> Contemplating the scene... He didn't have expect it from the

> cyborg. This jerk had made him hoping 'till the end...

Gohan: Made him hoping `till the end?

Trunks: What does _that_ mean?

Yamcha: *Singing again* He tried so hard and hoped so far but in the end it didn't even matter!

> Juuhanagou removed slowly his hand from Trunks's face and

> watched him for a moment. "He was too far...", he said softly to

> a Goku still under shock. He continued, caressing gently Trunks'

> cheek.

Yamcha: As opposed to `tenderly'.

> "Without oxygen, the organism products a lactic

> acid that destroy the cells. He had a too high concentration of

> this acid in his blood.

Trunks: Thank you Mr. Wizard.

> Even if I have decided to let him go now, he would have die...".

> He leaned to Trunks, and kissed him.

Trunks: *Passes out*

Yamcha: Eeewww....

Gohan: *Twitching* Too... much... information.... Too... much... information....

> Goku was too shocked by Trunks's death to react,

Yamcha: Trunks shot out a paralyzing ball of electricity?

Gohan: I'm not sure. I wasn't listening.

> even if his own son and wife were also dead, they died quickly,

> without him to realize that there was a chance for them,

All four: Huh?

> but in Trunks's case...

> He closed his eyes...

Gohan: He only closed them for Trunks' benefit!

Vegeta: He's dead. Not like he'd care.

> In the silence of the room, everything seemed suddenly normal...

> as if in a dream. Goku was feeling the darknesses coming around

> him. Juuhanagou released Trunks and after a while, laid him

> down slowly on the ground, brushing gently

Yamcha: Not tenderly?

> a purple lock of hair from the youth's face. Trunks's eyes were

> still half-opened, but they didn't see anything anymore...

Vegeta: Yes, dead people usually can't see things.

> Juuhanagou touched lightly the youth's lips, amazed. "They are

> still warm..."

Yamcha: Probably because you kissed him, ya sicko.

> Goku opened his eyes as Juuhanagou sighed and got up - as with

> regret -

Yamcha: As with regret?

Gohan: He regretted standing up? And when did he find time to sit in the first place?

Yamcha: I still want to know what happened to his knee.

> and began to walk to Goku's body, still asleep in the bed.

Vegeta: No... Kakarotto would be dead, because his soul is no longer in his body.

> "Someone will kill you for that" Goku's spirit said quietly.

Gohan: Someone with a body.

Yamcha: *Goku* It would be too hard for me, seeing as how I kind of pass through everything.

> He didn't want to fight anymore,

Gohan: Anymore? He wasn't fighting to begin with!

> he felt tired, more tired than he never felt in his whole life. And

> what could he do against those cyborgs as he couldn't even hit

> them without passing through them, doing no harm to them...

Yamcha: Was that a question?

Gohan: I don't know... without the question mark I couldn't tell.

> He didn't want to call help of someone...

Gohan: But he's not responsible of that.

> Too many people had already died, trying to save him. He

> remember Trunks's last thought.

Trunks: I wish I remember why I'm reading this story.

Yamcha: Glad to see you've joined us again.

Trunks: Not willingly.

> The youth was feeling too responsible for all the events. He

> didn't want to see Trunks's soul lost in sadness, with no way to

> find the peace... He didn't want to see this kid crying again.

Yamcha and Gohan: *Singing* Leave those kids alone!

Trunks: What, is Juunanagou a priest now?

> As he was going to die, he'd have to find Trunks and set his mind

> at rest... He has been linked to the youth, able to feel his

> feelings...

Gohan: Were they felt or silk? Satin? Cotton? Polished cotton?

> Perhaps would they still be linked in the after-life, this would be

> better if Goku'd have to find Trunks...

Yamcha: How would it be better if he _had_ to do it?

Trunks: You'd think it would be good if he _wanted_ to do it.

> He turned to face Trunks whose lifeless body was laying down

> near his sword, his face's expression was so sad...

> "Soon, kid... Soon...", Goku murmured feeling sadness filling his

> heart.

Yamcha: Soon... he will... what? Face the wrath of Khan?

Gohan: Wrong series.

> Juuhanagou reached the bed and turned a little to watch Goku's

> spirit. He lifted an eyebrow :

Vegeta: I seriously doubt that an eyebrow is a good replacement for a weight.

> "Really ? Do you think 'bout the other Saiya-jin, ... Vegeta,

> right ?".

Yamcha: Or is it Vegita? Vegetto? Bejitta? Bejita? Veggie-pie?

Vegeta: Stop. That. Now.

> He smiled : "Well, he's not a match for us..." He turned again to

> face Goku's body, his smile broadened. "And he'll never hear

> 'bout his son... except if I tell it myself. My sister won't, and

> *you*, you won't be able to speak anymore !".

Trunks: What was the comma for? Was he trying to think up an insult and couldn't come up with one so just said that?

> He smiles mischievously and lifted his hand...

Gohan: Must... not... complain... about... tense... mistakes....

> but another hand took his and stopped his movement. He turned

> to see his sister.

Yamcha: Aaah, _there's_ our little blonde android!

Gohan: She sure was patient to just sit there through all that.

> "It's my turn !", she said nearly coldly.

Yamcha: Just like the almost solid water.

> Juuhanagou released his hand, and shook his head : "you've

> killed two of them : his woman, and his son. I just killed one. So,

> it's still my turn."

> Juuhachigou frowned : "But you took your time... !"

Gohan: Man, she's whiny.

Yamcha: *Little kid* Moooom! He's touching meeeee!!

Trunks: *A different little kid* I am noooot!!!

> Juuhanagou faced Goku's body again, looking at her from the

> corner of his eyes. "It's still my turn ! Final point !"

Gohan: Wait! Are you out of the three point line or not?

> Juuhachigou didn't insist, even if she was becoming angry. She

> would destroy a city or two to calm her down.

Vegeta: Yes, I've always found destroying things helps me feel better.

Yamcha: _You_ at least.

> Juuhanagou raised his hand, curling it gracefully. "you don't

> even deserve my respect Goku,

Gohan: I've only seen about three capital Y's in this entire fic... And there have been more words beginning with Y that needed to be capitalized than three...

Trunks: Breathe, Gohan. Or at least breath.

> I was just programmed to kill you, and I didn't even fight against

> you. So, don't worry, you'll die quickly...". He smiled and

> plunged his hand up to the wrist into Goku's chest.

Yamcha: He then screamed, "AAHH! I LOST MY WATCH!"

> ********

> Goku cried out, and raised his hand to his chest, gasping.

Vegeta: And suddenly he's back in his body.

Trunks: Well, _I'm_ back to being confused...

> The next moment, Chichi put a wet cloth on his forehead, trying

> to calm him down. She yelled after Gohan for him to give her

> Goku's medicine.

Yamcha: I thought you two were dead.

Gohan: So did I...

> "Here it is !!", said Gohan, giving the bottle to his mother. She

> placed her hand under Goku's head and lifted it a little in order to

> make him drink a dosage of this future medicine.

Trunks: As opposed to some _other_ future medicine.

> Goku continued to gasp for breath,

Gohan: She actually got one of those words right!

> but after a while, he calmed down, and breathe normally,

Gohan: She got _one_ right, at least.

> again asleep, probably due also to the motor hums of the plane.

Yamcha: What were they humming? Rock-A-Bye Goku?

> "Phew, it looks like the medicine's starting to work", said Chichi,

> more reassured.

Trunks: More reassured than... what? The rest of us?

> "He's acting as if he had a nightmare", Trunks said. "It must be a

> terrible one..."

Gohan: Yes, the nightmare he just finished having must be terrible.

Trunks: I think I get it now...

> THE END

All four: YES!!

Yamcha: WE CAN LEAVE!! *Flies off*

Gohan: Excuse me while I go fill my brain with something written in proper English. *Walks away*

Trunks: I'm going to be traumatized for life over this...

Vegeta: Just as long as we don't tell Bulma. *Flies off*

Trunks: *Twitches and follows him*

~*~*~

I, once again, apologize to Roselyne Marot for that fic, and any fans of Roselyne Marot for that fic. I was reading this and just thought that it was really bad, is all. Anyways, please review and I might do another one ^^.

Gohan, Trunks, Yamcha, and Vegeta: NO!!!

Ja ne!