Dragon Ball/Z/GT Fan Fiction ❯ What the F*** happened? ❯ Where the fuck is it?? ( Chapter 1 )

Disclaimer: *Absurd music sounds* which one of the things is not like the other, which one of these things just doesn't belong! *Four pictures pop up: a bird, an orange, a microphone, and…uh…the number 3.* Can you guess what doesn't belong?? *dramatic pause* that's right! The orange! Toriyama Akira, Masako Nozawa, and Kageyama Hironobu all have rights to the glory that is Dragon Ball. I kinda don't. Oh Yeah, well I own Vegeta! Mwahahaha! *Vegeta walks up and interrupts CO's maniacal laughter. She turns and he cocks up his brow* Have MERCYYYYYY!!

Hajimemashou ne?

Optometrist to Patient: There are so many B/V fanfics, that we get lost in them, but we love the topic because it is so elusive and mysterious. One question plagues our ever curious minds, what is the truth, well it just so happens that I know the truth!

Patient to Optometrist: *Lifts his brow* what makes you so sure?

Optometrist to Patient: Just listen oh young and anxious heart, hear what I have to tell, and decide whether or not it is bullhonkey!

Patient to Optometrist: Not like I have anything better to do…

Chapter 1: Where the fuck is it?!?!

Vegeta-sama, Saiyajin no Ouji, the darkest nightmare of uncountable worlds, was royally pissed. He was beyond pissed, Vegeta was livid. He searched through his brain once again, ripping through his Bulma files.

"Favorite color…smell…Bra's birth…that hot outfit she wears when she wishes to seduce me, heheh, like she needs to…where the FUCK is it!?!?!?!?" He screamed at the top of his thoughts and kicked over the file cabinet. He popped out of his brain and back into CO's.

It was a disgusting place, represented by a castle. It was beautiful, perfectly constructed to be everything a fantasy seeker willed it to be, but it reeked of her. He was always glad to have reasons, any reasons at all to stay away from her actual consciousness, but not right now.

"Chibaka!!" he hollered viciously, "CHIBAKA!!!!!!!" outside of her mind CO pushed open an eyelid then shut it again as the morning hit her. The clock said AM. AM what, she didn't know, but the PM dot was missing. She settled back into sleep.

"No you don't!" Vegeta snapped. He manipulated his ki into his hand and blasted it at the wall. He lit another one and blasted a piece of furniture. CO winced, a bad headache forming. She popped into her mind. Vegeta stopped blasting things as she arrived.

"Whaddya want `geta?" she asked groggily. He clenched his fists tightly.

"Where is it!?!?!" he questioned. She frowned slightly.

"Where's what?" Vegeta growled loudly.

"My goddamned fucking blasted MEMORY Chibaka!!! I cannot remember the first time I fucked my Onna!!" CO yawned.

"Oh." She said falling back asleep. Vegeta growled again and threw another ki-blast, destroying her completely. She popped back into place after the dust settled.

"You're giving me a head ache!" she whined.

"I'll give you more than that if you don't tell me where it is!" he snapped threateningly. She yawned again and winced as he flicked his tail, she knew he would blast her again if she fell back asleep.

"I didn't take it." She said defiantly.

"Don't give me that, things like this always happen when you are starting another of your idiotic stories!" he accused. "You took it to cause conflict."

"I couldn't have taken it, I can't comprehend it!" she protested.

(A/N Vegeta is trapped within CO's mind and he can only remember the memories of his that CO knows a little about, namely what is shown on the show, with the exceptions of what he has sought out and brought back into her brain)

"Kusou!" he cursed loudly. "Well then where the hell is it?" Co shrugged.

"I dunno." She said simply. Vegeta growled.

"Well, then how am I supposed to get it back??" he asked. CO thought for a moment. Then a second. Then a minute.

"Hurry up." Vegeta growled impatiently, flicking his eyes towards his watch. (Yes, Vegeta does wear a watch. It's invisible colored, to confuse you). Co thought for another moment before a light bulb flashed above her head. "Finally." The Saiyajin muttered.

"We can go look for it!" she said. Vegeta's brow rose.

"You took two moments, a minute, and a second out of my day and that is all you came up with? Baka…"

"Yeah, but I know where to look, c'mon!" she pulled on his large arm. He pulled it away from her but followed. She led him to a door right outside his room. "Tah dah!" she exclaimed. Vegeta lifted his brow again.

"That's my closet." CO frowned.

"It is?" she opened the door to see Vegeta's things hanging there. "It is!" she pondered for a moment. She closed the door then opened it swiftly. Vegeta's pants were swaying lightly, but nothing had changed. She frowned and closed it again. She started to walk away, Vegeta followed. Without warning she turned and whipped open the door again. Still a closet. "Damn, it's too fast!"

Vegeta frowned and crossed his arms, waiting as she opened and closed the door several more times. Finally he was sick of it.

"Are you finished?" he asked so loudly and authoritative that CO stopped immediately.

"No…" she said warily. Vegeta strutted over to the closet and slammed it shut.

"This," he jabbed his finger towards the door "is a closet. Open it, it's a closet, shut it, and it's a closet, open it AGAIN and it's STILL a-" he looked through the door to catch a hastily retreating white room. He gave it a Vegeta glare for making her right and him sound like an idiot. "You! Get your ass back here!" he said with malice only Vegeta could present.

The room was hesitant, but slowly moved back, replacing the closet scene with a new one.

The room was not really a room, but a hallway. The walls were painted an immaculate shade of white, with not a spec of dirt on them. A little ways down the hall, on either side of them was a row of doors that stretched on until you couldn't see any more, with a break every so often where another hall met it.

Above them hung a sign: "The B/V get together."

***

Oh, just to let you all know I will be having chapters that will basically be different B/V fanfics with CO and my Vegeta watching and commenting. So if you want me to include your B/V fic (any genre or rating) or want to use one of the ones I came up with, just let me know.

If I use yours I'll give you credit before the chapter and read yours and review it with suggestions from a writers stand point and if you want to use mine I would appreciate it if you'd give me credit and I'll come and read and review it, ok?

Jaa Mata!