Fake Fan Fiction ❯ Boarding School ❯ Separation ( Chapter 22 )

Thanks for the reviews minna-san! Again, I got this chapter out early because of all your support! There's probably only a chapter or two left, so things are really going to start to getting interesting!

 

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Disclaimer: I don't own Fake.

 

 

Dee was practically giddy with excitement. JJ was gone after what seemed like hours of pestering and, eventually, bribery to get him to leave. But it would be more than worthwhile, he would have Ryo all to himself tonight. As he waited, stretched out on his bed, the dark-haired boy let one hand stray between his legs to brush lightly over his stiffening member. Just the anticipation of this evening was more than enough to arouse him. The fleeting caresses stolen in hallways and under tables in the library had caused him no small amount of frustration. After having Ryo next to him in bed for so many nights over Christmas break, it was absolute torture not to be able to make love to him, to hold him, to cherish him naked and alone under the sheets.

 

Taking a deep breath, Dee calmed himself; if he kept thinking about the enticing blonde he'd end up coming by himself before the boy even arrived. Finally, mercifully, he heard the door creak open.

 

“Dee?” The room was dark and Ryo's eyes had trouble adjusting. He felt more nervous than usual sneaking around the halls after lights-out, since the encounter with Martin earlier that day.

 

Strong arms encircled his waist the moment the door shut behind him and Ryo leaned gratefully into his lover's comforting embrace.

 

“It's been /way/ to long, Ryo!”

 

“Dee.” He said the name wistfully, longingly. This was all he ever wanted, to stay wrapped in his lover's arms, safe and protected.

 

Then the dark-haired boy's hands began an eager exploration of his body, reacquainting himself with Ryo's curves and angles.

 

“Oh God, Ryo!” Dee breathed in a lustful tone, his senses overwhelmed at finally having the boy all to himself. As his fingers caressed the blonde's chest, causing Ryo to arch his back response, Dee lapped at the hollow of his collarbone.

 

“Lay down on the bed,” Dee commanded, nipping lightly at the other's throat.

 

Ryo, dizzy with pleasure, complied, deliberately stretching out his slender frame enticingly over the bed.

 

Dee practically pounced on him. Hands seemed to grope everywhere at once, and Ryo was quickly stripped naked. Pausing his assault, Dee took the time to soak in all of Ryo's beauty, his erection twitching at the captivating sight.

 

Reaching a graceful hand to tangle in Dee's hair, the blonde pulled his mouth down to his own and claimed his lips in a heady kiss.

 

“Ryo, I can't get enough of you!” Dee whispered, his voice filled with desperate need.

 

Over and over the boy spoke Ryo's name until, unbidden, came the another voice into his mind: /`It's what your lover calls you at night when you think no one's listening.'/

 

A sudden fear struck him. What if Martin was creeping through the hallways right now? The snide, perverse face of the teacher filled Ryo's thoughts as he imagined him on the other side of the door. It was perfectly reasonable to think that Martin might have heard Dee use his real name at another time, perhaps when they thought they were alone in a hallway, but the idea that the man may have eavesdropped before on their lovemaking caused the boy's stomach to lurch with sick revulsion.

 

“Wait, Dee! Stop!” He needed a second to breath.

 

“Ryo! I want you, I need you!” came the heated reply.

 

But this declaration had the opposite of the intended effect; all Ryo could see now was Martin, his foul breath and probing hands. Panic seized him and he shoved Dee away from him harder than he'd intended.

 

“Ryo! What the hell is wrong with you!”

 

It wasn't the most sensitive reply, but Dee was deeply hurt that Ryo was, apparently, rejecting him.

 

“I- I'm sorry. I was just overwhelmed, give me a second.”

 

Dee reached deep down into the last vestiges of his patience and restrained himself from vocalizing his frustration. He thought they had passed this stage long ago. Had he come on too strong? Or was it something else?

 

“Is something bothering you? Did something happen?” he ventured.

 

Ryo bit his lip. If he was going to tell Dee about Martin, now was the time. He envisioned the boy's reaction, imagined him yelling and standing up in wrath to track down the teacher and pummel him in his sleep.

 

“No, I just… I don't know…”

 

Dee's brow knotted in pain, “You can't still be afraid of me?”

 

“No!” Ryo immediately assured. “No, it's not that! I… well…”

 

What could he say?

 

“It's been a long time since we've done it in school and I'm afraid someone will hear us.”

 

Technically, this was true, but it omitted a few rather crucial facts.

 

At his explanation, Dee smiled seductively. “I have ways to keep you quiet,” he whispered, leaning in close to run his tongue along the soft skin of his neck, “Don't you remember what I did at your Aunt and Uncle's place?”

 

Oh, yes, he remembered. /Vividly/. And if that wasn't enough, Dee devoted the rest of the night to jogging his memory.

 

* * *

Although his night with Dee went a long way to easing Ryo's mind, he still felt uncomfortable in Martin's class come Monday. Even more disturbing, however, was a sudden interruption during the class by the Secretary to the Dean.

 

“Sorry to disrupt,” she said, “but the Dean needs to speak with Mr. Laytner.”

 

This earned a clatter of whispered jeers from the students, but Ryo's eyes widened in alarm. What was going on? It would have to be something serious for Dee to be summoned straight to the Dean instead of the Headmaster. But he could think of nothing that would warrant such a visit; on the contrary, Dee hadn't gotten into trouble since they'd arrived back after break.

 

The raven-haired boy threw the blonde a wink before striding with nonchalance up to the Secretary. It struck Ryo as odd that the woman gave Dee a look of sympathy rather than reproach and something stirred in the pit of the boy's stomach- something dark, an unacknowledged fear, as if his instincts could guess what this meant, but his rational mind refused to accept it.

 

The rest of the day passed in a blur. Ryo couldn't ever recall feeling so anxious. Each class began with the hope of Dee's return, and each ended with the boy's seat disquietingly empty.

 

When the last class was finally dismissed, Ryo rushed to find Dee, but he wasn't sure where to look first. Surely he couldn't still be in conference with the Dean? Where would he be then? His room.

 

The blonde made record time back to the dormitory and there he found Dee. The young man was calmly packing his things.

 

“Dee!” he cried, rushing into the room.

 

But the greaser stood there blankly, folding his clothes and perfunctory stowing them into his duffel bag.

 

“Dee!” Ryo yelled now, taking the boy firmly by the shoulders and forcing him to stop his mechanical actions. “Talk to me! Tell me what's going on! Did they expel you for something?”

 

He shook his head, no.

 

“What then?” Ryo asked desperately.

 

“It's Aaron,” Dee replied in a voice choked on sorrow and rage, “He's dead. They found his body in an alley, shot in the head.”

 

Ryo recoiled in shock. It felt as if his extremities had gone numb and sat on the bed as his knees went weak.

 

“Dead? Murdered?”

 

The dark-haired boy nodded and returned to his packing.

 

“How? Do the police know?”

 

Dee hesitated. “They're not sure, but it was probably drug related.”

 

Ryo didn't know what to say.

 

“I never told you this,” Dee began, “but I knew at Christmas that Aaron was using again and he may have been selling himself to get his fix.” It was painful to say it aloud, but he felt lighter for it, glad to finally share his burden with his lover. “I guess I didn't tell you before because I didn't think Aaron would have wanted you to know… but it doesn't matter now…”

 

“I'm so sorry, Dee.”

 

“The funeral's in a few days, I'm leaving tonight.”

 

Sitting on the bed, Ryo could feel himself starting to tremble, tears pricking the backs of his eyes. “There's something I should tell you too,” he finally managed.

 

Dee turned to him and the blonde winced at the hollow eyes that looked back at him.

 

For a moment he said nothing, then Dee heard him whisper, in a barely audible voice, “It's my fault.”

 

“Don't be stupid, how could it be your fault?” he said, still folding his shirts and pants- anything that would keep him busy enough to hold back his grief just a little while longer.

 

Ryo's dark eyes began to redden with the onset of his tears. “But it is, I could have helped him get his expulsion overturned, I could have gotten him back here so that this never would have happened.”

 

Dee's actions were becoming increasingly agitated, shoving pieces of clothing into the bag. He didn't want to think about what Ryo or anyone one /could/ have done, how they had failed… how /he/ had failed. It was too soon and he couldn't bear to face that yet.

 

“Shut up, Ryo!” he said angrily. “It over! He's dead! He wouldn't listen to us, he wouldn't appeal his case! What could we have done?”

 

There was an anguished pause in which Ryo realized he had to confess the truth he had been hiding from his lover for so long. He clenched his fists, firmed his resolve and said, “But I know the /real/ reason Martin expelled him.”

 

Dee went as still as stone and whirled around to face him.

 

“What do you mean?”

 

The tears now tumbled freely down Ryo's pale cheeks. “I guessed it a long time ago, but I never knew for sure… I think Martin was molesting him and expelled him when Aaron refused to comply.”

 

“And just how the HELL do you know this?” Dee shouted. This was too painful, he didn't want to know this, not now, not when the pain was so fresh. But it all fit. He knew Aaron had been sexually abused when he was a child and that he was an easy target for predators. When he saw the man pawing him in that alley over break, he should have tried harder to get through to him. Now it was too late.

 

Walking to the bed opposite Ryo, Dee sat down hard and shoved the heels of his hands into his eyes to press back the tears. No, he wouldn't give in. He wouldn't, couldn't, think about this! Yet now that the door had been opened, he couldn't turn back.

 

“Tell me how you know this, Ryo!” he demanded.

 

The blonde had been watching him in agony, wishing he could comfort him instead of bringing him this troubling news. But it needed to be said.

 

“I saw Aaron come out of Martin's office a couple times late in the evening and he looked… used. But more importantly, I know… because Martin tried to do the same to me.”

 

Dee's eyes widened in astonishment.

 

“What?” His tone was softer, but no less stunned.

 

“He asked to speak with me after class and when I came there later… h-he started to touch me…”

 

Across from him, Dee's fists flexed so tightly his knuckles shown white. “When I get back, I am going to kill that son of a bitch!”

 

“That won't solve anything!” Ryo shot back.

 

“Why didn't you tell me this?”

 

“Well, for one, I thought you might get yourself expelled by going after him.”

 

Dee snorted. “Can't blame you there, because I do plan to fuck him up pretty good.”

 

“No, Dee, please!” Ryo kneeled before him plaintively, “Don't throw everything away for someone like him! I know I should've come forward right away, but I'll do it now and we'll get Martin sacked, I promise.”

 

Although he wasn't convinced, Dee nodded.

 

“I'm sorry you had to go through that, Ryo,” he told him, letting a hand caress his handsome features. “But why are you blaming yourself about Aaron? This just happened, right? Even if you came forward, it would have taken weeks, maybe months to sort it out and get Aaron reinstated in school… it still would have been too late.” These last words were spoken with a terse bitterness and again he had to fight to hold onto his composure.

 

If he wanted, Ryo could leave matters there, but he knew he'd always feel the burden of his guilt if he didn't reveal the whole truth to Dee now.

 

“But,” the blonde began, trembling, “this DID happen months ago… before Aaron was expelled.”

 

Dee didn't say anything at first, his face contorted in confusion. “I don't understand.”

 

Sitting on his knees, staring up into his lover's eyes, Ryo watched the conflicted emotions shift across Dee's face as the implications of this new information slowly crept over his brain. “You mean, this whole time you knew… and yet you let Aaron get expelled on false accusations… lied to me for months… let Martin go on teaching you?”

 

The anguished look of hurt, disappointment and grief in the boy's glassy emerald eyes pierced Ryo will a pain so acute and so severe he thought that surely his heart would be torn apart at any moment.

 

“Why?” Dee asked, a tortured look on his face.

 

The tears dangled from Ryo's chin and stained his shirt as he spoke. “I was afraid, Dee,” came his weak reply. “At first I just wanted to forget it. Then when Aaron was expelled I thought I could convince him to make his own appeal so I wouldn't have to say anything… I didn't want to come forward myself, I thought people would start questioning my credibility, that they'd try to search my background, my family…”

 

At this point Dee's temper was starting to flair. He was worn to his emotional extremes, nearly pushed beyond his limits and he was starting to crack under the pressure.

 

“You're reputation!?” he spat out. “All this happened because you were worried about your rep? About people calling you a `Jap'?”

 

Ryo visibly flinched at the slur. “I'm sorry!” he pleaded. “But it's not that simple! I was ashamed at what had happened! I didn't know what to do!” he cried.

 

Steeping around Ryo, Dee stood up and paced across the floor. He felt as if he was drowning, his overwrought emotions swelling about him and threatening to pull him under. His closest friend was dead and his lover had just confessed to him that he might have been able to avert the entire tragedy. Both of them had suffered in silence and he'd been unable to do anything about it, had been unable to protect either man he cared for. Finally, his will broke.

 

“Why did you tell me this now? WHY?” Dee's voice choked with the tears that burst forth as he crumpled to the floor, the floodgates of his grief pouring over him.

 

Ryo reached a hand to comfort him, but Dee pushed him aside. The raven-haired boy couldn't even think straight, his misery too acute. He didn't want to push Ryo away, but he couldn't absorb everything the boy had just told him and he didn't know how to deal with his own guilt.

 

He couldn't have Ryo there beside him right now.

 

“Ryo,” he said, his voice shaking, “I need you to leave.”

 

If Ryo had been physically stabbed in his gut it couldn't possibly have hust any worse than these words.

 

“Dee… please…”

 

But his lover said nothing.

 

Dee had shut him out.

 

When the blonde finally and reluctantly left, the quiet click of the door closing behind him echoed the hollowness in his heart.

 

 

***

This chapter was really tricky to write. I had to revise and revise to get the end scene just right- I hope it came off ok!

It was hard to put poor Ryo and Dee through this too, but I'd known for a long time it was going to happen… *sniffle*

 

Reviews welcome and e-mail me if you want to get advanced chapters!

mizu@goddessmail.com