Fake Fan Fiction ❯ Verge of Something Wonderful ❯ Laughter Through The Rain ( Chapter 11 )

Ryo lay tangled up in Dee's arms dozing in and out of sleep, waking to hear the rain still going on and sliding back under with the sound still in his ears. Let it rain he thought. Let it rain and keep me here in this little world just a little bit longer. I'm tired of waking up alone and tired of worrying about what I should feel and how I should behave. Let the rain come down a bit longer and keep the real world out of reach. In his sleep his dreams slid by, nonsensical and fuzzy, things half remembered, bright bursts of colors, events and people he had never met yet still seemed familiar. It all came and went with his light sleep, the comfort of Dee's body and the constant rain lulling him and easing his mind.

It wasn't until the grey of dawn had given way to an even greyer morning that either of the two men really bothered to move around but it was like an unspoken agreement had been reached between them. Yesterday had been hell, it was down pouring, and they weren't working today. Ryo slipped out while Dee was in the shower to get them both some coffee and make sure they could re-rent the hotel room for the rest of the day and night. At the front counter the keys to their rental car waited for him with a short note from Ellen that she had a friend follow her up so she could drop it off and that she was heading back to the house to see about the disaster in the bathroom. Ryo took the keys and slid them into his pocket, making a mental note to call her later, before heading back to their room.

Dee was out of the bathroom when he got back and already back in his sweat pants for the day. Ryo couldn't blame him; he had every intention of spending the day in his own sweatpants and t-shirt. Ryo handed over a cup of coffee and a few muffins from the breakfast bar to Dee before carefully climbing back in the same bed with him. “Good morning.” He offered as he settled back against the pillows and headboard of the bed.

“Good morning to you too, thanks for the coffee.” Dee replied as he held his cup steady over the bed's movements. Once Ryo had settled Dee scooted into place beside him and for a while they simply sat in comfortable silence listening to the rain.

Ryo sipped at his coffee, slow and steady, trying to think of where to go from here. What to do when you find you've put yourself in a position where you can't go back but you are still trembling inside at the thought of going forward? Ryo had spent a long night just full of the type of realizations he either wished he wouldn't have had at all or wished they had come sooner. Particularly the realization that he was not doing right by Dee and Dee deserved better or at least a resolution.

The coffee was waking his mind up but was doing an absolutely tap dance on his emotions. He should have had a very nice and soothing cup of chamomile instead, something to calm his nerves, not rile them up more. It had seemed reasonable to blame Dee for the state of his life because Dee started everything between them in the first place, Dee kept everything going, and Dee was the fire that was always nipping at his heels. And that knowledge had gotten Ryo through everything he had or had not done when it came to Dee and his red hot pursuit. Ryo had simply taken no responsibility for anything because he had convinced himself that since Dee had started it, started everything, that he was not responsible for anything. It was rather unfortunate and sorry state of affairs that his brain had finally kicked in and informed him otherwise.

He could have said no to Dee, he could have not let him kiss him and responded…Christ. He could have firmly stood his ground, pushed him away, and...Ryo's shoulders slumped... and he could have done any of the things a person would do if they were being pursued and did not want it. He could have asked for a transfer from the 27th, asked for a new partner, demanded a new partner more like it, or even threatened sexual harassment charges.

But he hadn't. Had he?

Instead he had asked Dee to kiss him again so he could compare it to Berkley Rose's kiss, something he doubted very few straight men, no matter how accepting of homosexuality, would have done. He had taken care of Dee when Dee was sick and had convinced his self that that was what all good partners would do for their partner. That wasn't true, other partners went home to their significant others or whatever consisted of their lives, maybe they would have dropped by and wished them well before heading out to the game or to the bar or to pick up their dry cleaning. They would not have spent the night with the other person's head in their lap, petting their hair. That is what a lover or a spouse would do not a `work partner'.

And Dee, Ryo's jaw tightened, he couldn't believe he let himself be so ridiculously, even immaturely, deliberately blind; Dee had taken care of him too, Dee had done things for him that were clearly the signs of a committed and practically married man. Ryo had glossed it over the same way he had glossed over his own behavior, writing it all off as `good partners' or even worse, an attempt on Dee's part to worm his way into Ryo's pants. Just exactly how fabulous did he think he was that Dee would do all he had done just for a toss in the sheets?

Ryo really didn't want to answer his own question. Dee was in love him. Ryo had never been surer of anything in his life than he was of this fact and he was an idiot for not seeing it sooner. An idiot that had taken unfair emotional advantage of the other man and could only begin to excuse himself for his actions by admitting he had been too stupid to see the truth. And too afraid. He had to admit the afraid apart too which made him feel not only dumb but a coward as well.

Something must have shown on his face, slipped through and attracted Dee's attention, because Dee's warm fingers had suddenly come up to grip Ryo's hand and cup, steadying it before he was pulled into an embrace, snug against the other man's chest. Fortunately Dee didn't say anything, he just held him and for that Ryo was grateful. He had no idea what he wanted to say to Dee. Did he want to apologize for not realizing things sooner? Confess his own feelings and ask for forgiveness for being so blind? He really didn't know. So instead he breathed out slowly and eased himself into Dee's hold, letting Dee pry the cup from him and set it down out of harm's way. His eyes drifted down and noticed the fine drops of coffee on the bed spread and he realized his fingers were trembling. Ah, so that was it, Dee would notice him spilling coffee all over everything.

Dee nuzzled the side of his head, his breath warm against the skin and in his hair. Ryo smiled. For such a loud and aggressive man Dee could be so earnest and sweet sometimes. It felt good to just be beside him like this, warm and safe. Dee had learned when to pull a punch with Ryo, when not to push. One never knew what the next hour would bring, he could find his back against the wall and Dee's tongue in his mouth again, but for now he knew he was in good hands that only wanted to comfort him. Dee planted a soft, chaste kiss on his forehead and they both settled back to listen to the rain and snuggle in bed.

The sleep that had evaded both the men during the night caught up with them in the soft grayness, pulling them into light slumbers and shared warmth. They didn't so much sleep the day away as glide through it loosing patches of time to daydreams and half lidded eyes. It was well into the afternoon before any real desire to stir came to either of them and even then it was more the persistent grumbles of hungry bellies that got either man to move than it was a real desire to get up and do anything.

Well to be perfectly honest, it was Dee's loudly complaining empty stomach that caused the break in the quiet tranquility. Dee was currently cursing said stomach verbally and Ryo was quietly laughing at him affectionately. Ryo had previously been asleep and woke up to find that at some point Dee had settled his head on his chest and had snaked his arm up Ryo's tummy, which Dee had been contentedly petting for quite some time while listening to Ryo's heartbeat. Since Dee's hand had stayed above his waist line and the caresses were quite soothing Ryo hadn't done anything about it and let his self continue to slide between being awake and asleep. Until Dee's always ravenous appetite had made itself known, grumbling against Ryo's side and thigh and eventually waking Ryo up so he could listen to Dee whisper vehemently to his stomach to can it already.

Ryo couldn't keep himself from giggling which immediately brought Dee's head up and those intense green eyes of his to focus on him. Ryo smiled impishly unable to resist teasing Dee a little.

“Maybe he's just jealous that you're giving so much attention to my stomach instead of feeding him.” He told Dee unable to hold back his laughter. Dee gave him a wicked grin, his eyes sliding into slits. Ryo knew he was in trouble when he felt Dee's arm tighten around him as Dee pulled his body to lie on top of Ryo pinning him to the bed.

“Oh is that so? Jealous is he?” Dee asked, all sugary and sweet before his other arm crept up and started tickling Ryo along his ribcage and the side of his stomach. Ryo squealed and tried to break free attacking back as best he could but Dee was not nearly as ticklish as Ryo was and he had the distinct advantage of being a dirty fighter. When Ryo tried to get him off his side and ribcage Dee went for his armpits and Ryo moved to end that torment he used the opening to go for the soft skin of his belly, then when Ryo tried to twist away from that he used his weight to pin Ryo on his side while going for his back and then the underside of his knees. Ryo was hopelessly wriggling mess of limbs beneath him and soon out of breath and flushed from shrieking and laughing, it wasn't until he started to cough that Dee pulled back and let Ryo catch his breath.

Happy with his self Dee flopped back down on the now thoroughly unmade bed. Ryo had barely gotten his breathing back under control when Dee's stomach grumbled loudly again. Dee rolled over on his side and looked at Ryo and with a completely deadpanned face said “Look what you made me do, working up an appetite like that, I guess you're going to have to take me out to dinner to make up for it.”

Ryo fanned himself trying to cool down his overheated face but still managed to roll his eyes at his irrepressible partner before responding. “Oh I am, am I?”

Dee nodded at him earnestly in response. “Yes, you are. It's in the rules.”

“And what rules would these be, the ones you just make up as you go along?” Ryo asked wryly.

“Oh, yes, of course, those rules. My rules are the best rules to live by after all.” Dee replied with another sage nod of his head.

“They are? And why is that?” Ryo asked, his voice full of amusement, knowing how it would end.

“Because that way I always win!” Dee chirped his eyes full of mischief and glee. It was this face that would always do Ryo in, not that Dee needed to know that, but this face that was so open and full of life and belied the cynical man that Dee should by all accounts be. This bright winsome smile, these light and life filled eyes, it was no wonder to Ryo at all that Dee's Mother had such a soft spot for the boy he had been and had believed him no matter how far off course Dee had gotten as a teenager. You could forgive nearly anything to see that smile. Ryo smiled at him caught up in the infectious love of life that Dee had and so easily shared.

“Come on Dee; let's go find something to eat, the sooner we do the sooner we can get back to bed.” Ryo told him, his hand coming out to gently touch and smooth over the skin of Dee's cheek. Dee's eyes went wide and Ryo gave him a different, softer smile. He knew Dee was trying to figure out what Ryo meant by that comment but having been rebuffed so many times wasn't confident to think it meant what wanted it to mean. To be honest Ryo wasn't sure how much he meant by the comment either and a little thrill went through him of how the night could go. He wasn't sure he was ready for Dee to jump on him and try to go `all the way' but he was sure he wouldn't regret letting Dee try to convince him.