Fan Fiction / Yu Yu Hakusho Fan Fiction ❯ Movie Rip-offs, Act I: Bite Me (The Princess Bride, Yu Yu Style) ❯ Life in Separate Worlds ( Chapter 10 )

DISCLAIMER: See ALL PREVIOUS CHAPTERS!!!

 

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Li: Why me? cries

 

Ava: pats Li on the back It's okay, Li…it's a very great loss, I know, but you will get past this…

 

Li: How? He was…such a good friend to me…

 

Adara: comes over to Li and Ava What's going on? What happened?

 

Ava: Someone stole Rico.

 

Adara: Rico Suave?

 

Ava: Yep.

 

Li: I CANNOT GO ON LIVING! I DIE WITHOUT YOU, RICO! begins to sing I die…without you…

 

Voice Over Megaphone: WHO TOOK MY ELEGANCE BOOK?!

 

Li: freezes, then her eye begins to twitch KARASU!!!

 

Ava: Uh-oh…

 

Adara: This could get ugly.

 

Ava: And Li ain't pretty when she gets ugly.

 

Adara: Nope.

 

Li: KARASU! runs over and begins to chase Karasu around Karasu, c'mere! GIVE ME BACK MY RICO!

 

Karasu: NOOOO! PLEASE! I'M SORRY I'M SORRY I'M SORRY!

 

Li: THAT'S NOT GOOD ENOUGH!

 

Karasu: Li, I am willing to raise Rico in self-defense if I must.

 

Li: DON'T YOU DARE! I'LL SAVE YOU, RICO, MY LOVE, MY LIFE!

 

Karasu: raises megaphone I'll smash it, I swear I will!

 

Li: raises long spear that she pulled randomly out of the air AAAAAYIEEEEEEE! jumps at Karasu

 

Ava: watching Li rip at Karasu's hair So…when do we intervene?

 

Adara: I'll let ya know.

 

Ava: Okay. Come get me when the show gets dull.

 

Adara: Right on.

 

XXX

 

Karasu left for his voyage the following week. No one knew where he went on these ever-more-frequent voyages. Some said he was having an affair with a Guilderian, others said that he couldn't find the right wedding dress in Florin and had taken to the sea as he sailed to other places trying to find one, and still other theorized that he traveled to Guilder once a month because he'd finally found someone over there who could give him the perfect haircut.

 

Kurama didn't care what the reason was. He just wanted Karasu gone.

 

The day that Karasu left, Kurama refused to leave his room. Karasu liked to think it was because the redhead was heartbroken over his fiancé's leaving again, but the fact was, Kurama just didn't care anymore.

Yomi came to find him after Karasu's send-off. He carried a cup of tea in one hand, as had become his custom.

 

Kurama was sitting at his desk in front of the window, staring out with a blank look on his face, an open book lying forgotten in front of him. He turned when the door opened, and smiled slightly—Kurama didn't truly smile very often these days—and asked, “What is it with you bringing me tea every time you come here?”

 

“Habit, I guess.”

 

“Is he gone?” Kurama asked, casually.

 

“Yes. He's gone.”

 

“Thank the gods, I thought he'd never leave.”

 

Yomi laughed and handed Kurama the cup.

 

“So…when are you leaving?”

 

“Day after tomorrow. I want Karasu far, far away before I leave.”

 

“I want Karasu far, far away, period.”

 

Yomi laughed again and was about to say something before the door slammed open.

 

“YOMI!”

 

The tall, six-eared man jumped at least two feet higher than was normal as the newcomer marched right up to him and grabbed one of his ears, dragging him toward the door as she screamed her obscenities.

 

“YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE LOOKING FOR A CREW! AND PACKING! AND YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE WATERING MY GARDEN! WE HAD A DEAL AND SO HELP ME GOD YOU WILL HOLD UP YOUR END OF IT! NOW, YOU'RE LEAVING IN TWO DAYS AND HERE YOU ARE WASTING THEM! GET TO WORK, YOU FILTHY INGRATE!”

 

Yomi looked absolutely terrified, and Kurama smiled, completely ignoring Yomi as he grabbed the edge of the desk in a desperate attempt to stop the Ancient Booer's relentless pulling. “Hello, Genkai.”

 

“Oh, hello, Kurama,” Genkai replied, yanking Yomi away from the desk. “SUCK IT UP, YOU OVERSIZED BABY! TAKE IT LIKE A MAN!”

 

“Kurama, help! Don't let her take me!”

 

“Why, Yomi, I have no idea what you're talking about.”

 

“Please don't leave me alone with her! This chick's insane!”

 

This earned Yomi a smack on the head. “RESPECT YOUR ELDERS, YOU INSOLENT BRAT!”

 

Yomi grabbed the edge of the doorframe in a last-ditch effort to remain in the room and away from the tiny scary lady. “YOU OWE ME, KURAMA!” he screamed in a panicked voice.

 

“Excuse me?” Kurama replied, amused.

 

“I'M GETTING HIEI BACK FOR YOU! YOU STILL HAVE A LIFE BECAUSE OF ME!”

 

“Seriously, man…now it's just getting sad…” Kurama raised an eyebrow, and tried not to smile.

 

At last, Yomi was dragged, kicking and screaming, into the corridor. Genkai's yells at him could be heard all the way down the hall.

 

“Ah! Stop kicking me, I'm going!”

 

“DON'T BE SMART WITH ME!”

 

“I could die tomorrow and they could very well trace it back to this moment!”

“MOVE!”

 

“KURAMA, IT'S NOT TOO LATE TO HELP ME, YOU KNOW!”

 

“LEAVE THE POOR BOY ALONE! HE HAS ENOUGH TO DEAL WITH WITHOUT YOU RELYING ON HIM TO HELP PRESERVE YOUR LAZINESS!”

 

“KURAMA, HIEI'S RETURN DEPENDS ON ME ACTUALLY LIVING PAST THIS MOMENT!”

 

Slowly, their voices faded.

 

Kurama chuckled and turned back to his book.

 

XXX

 

The sun was just beginning to rise over Cuba, but the day was already quite warm. The beach was empty except for two people lying under a palm tree. As the first ray of sun touched the ocean waters, the taller of the two rolled over and slid one arm around the smaller one's waist.

 

“Mmm…morning,” Miguel said sleepily, snuggling closer to Benji's side.

 

“Morning,” Benji replied, threading his fingers in Miguel's red hair.

 

“What time is it?”

 

“Early.”

 

“Mm…hate early. Must kill early.” Miguel yawned adorably as he turned over so he was face-to-face with Benji.

 

Benji chuckled and gave Miguel a quick kiss. “You're so cute.”

 

Miguel blushed, yawning again. Then he sat up slowly and leaned back against the tree, placing one hand on Benji's hair and playing idly with the snowy white locks. Miguel had always wondered how Benji had gotten hair so white…

 

Benji remained where he was, his eyes closed. The gentle touch on his hair was starting to lull him back to sleep when…

“SNUGGLEBUNNY!”

 

The effect of that voice was identical to that of icy water being tossed on their heads. Benji jerked awake and shot into sitting position. Miguel moved closer to him, looking terrified. “He's back…”

 

“It's that special time of day,” Benji replied sarcastically.

 

“We could run away.”

 

“Too late.”

 

And so it was. Only seconds later, a small, annoying ball of energy threw itself on top of Benji.

 

“Good mooorning,” Berkley said in a singsong voice. “How's my Mr. Wonderful today?”

 

“Tired. Get off me.” And with that, Benji shoved Berkley onto the sand, stood, and extended a hand to help Miguel to his feet, pulling the redhead into a kiss.

 

“Oh, Mr. Sexy, why do you torture me so?” Berkley wailed, throwing himself in tears onto the sand.

 

Benji and Miguel completely ignored him as they walked hand-in-hand away from the beach.

 

XXX

 

“So, Kurama, my love, what do you want to do today?” Hiei asked his coconut, smoothing the banana peel on top of said coconut. “Do you want to swim?”

 

Silence.

 

“Oh, you want some food? Okay, I'll go get us some bananas.” Smiling at the coconut, he stood and went to one of the trees, pulling himself deftly up the trunk and pulling for bananas down. He then peeled two of them and set them next to the coconut on the ground, then took a bite of his own. He finished his bananas and looked over at the coconut. “Kurama, you aren't eating,” he said, looking concerned. “Are you sick?” He reached out and placed a hand on the coconut. “Well, you don't have a fever…but you should probably rest for today. I'll go get the checkerboard, and we can play so you don't get bored. Stay here, okay?”

 

Hiei had gone completely insane.

 

XXX

 

Night had fallen in Cuba, and the weather cooled. Miguel and Benji had spend a pleasant day pearl-diving in the warm, shallow waters near their home. Er…palm tree. They had then gone into the bar as the sun started to set, and Benji had gotten caught up in a card game with a group of men who'd seemed nice enough to begin with, but one of them had accused Benji of cheating, and things had gotten ugly.

 

So now Benji and Miguel were standing outside the bar, backed against its outside wall and surrounded by several very angry-looking men. Benji shot Miguel a grin, unsheathing the Spanish rapier he kept at his side at all times. Miguel took out his own sword—it was exactly like Benji's with an intricately carved silver handle—and smiled back.

 

I hope Kurama's having a good time at that Godforsaken palace, Benji thought to himself.

 

XXX

 

Back at the palace

 

Kurama sat on his bed, trying to read. The castle was completely dead. Kurama was bored out of his mind. He wanted Hiei back…

 

XXX

 

Back in Cuba

 

Benji loved fighting. It always gave him a thrill. Killing he didn't like, but he loved the fighting part that came before it. Miguel would always deny it, but he was the same way.

 

As Benji took a swing at one of the men, he thought, I hope Hiei's having as much fun as I am, wherever the hell he is.

 

 

XXX

 

Back on Gilligan's Island

 

Hiei sat across from the coconut with a checkerboard between then. Head in his hands, he stared intently at the board, then at the coconut. “It's your move…”

 

XXX

 

Back in Cuba

 

“Here…come sit over here,” Miguel said, leading Benji over to the bed against the wall. The fight was over, and they were in Miguel's house. It was small, but very comfortable, and Benji settled gratefully onto the bed.

 

“Keep holding the cloth on it,” Miguel ordered, handing Benji a clean towel to press on the cut on his arm. He went over to grab some bandages from a large box by the stove, then came back over to Benji. “Let me see…” He gently took the towel from Benji's hands, examining the wound gently. “It doesn't look too bad,” he said after a silent moment. “It's just bleeding a lot. I don't think it needs stitches. Hold still.”

 

The room was silent as Miguel gently cleaned and bandaged Benji's arm.

 

“If you ever get us into something like this again I'm gonna kill you,” Miguel said after a while. His head was bowed so that Benji couldn't see his face.

 

Benji chuckled. “You were having the time of your life a few minutes ago.”

 

“Was not.”

 

“Were too.”

 

“Was not.”

 

“Were too.”

 

“I am not getting into a `was not, were too' argument with a man who just almost got himself killed by a guy who was so drop dead blind drunk that he couldn't even remember his own name.”

 

“Bite me.” Benji wasn't really sure what made him say that. It just felt…right. Maybe he was channeling Hiei…

 

Miguel, however, suddenly looked up, smiling evilly. “Was that an open invitation?” He leaned over and kissed Benji, one hand still over the bandage on Benji's arm.

 

Benji lay back on the bed, bring Miguel with him. “Pervert.”

 

“But at least I'm a pretty one.”

 

Benji grinned and pulled Miguel in for another kiss. This one was long and lingering and it was quite a while before Miguel pulled away and laid his head on Benji's chest, throwing one arm around his lover's waist. Benji's good arm tightened around the redhead, and he buried his face in the red hair. They fell asleep like that, each of them smiling.

 

XXX

 

A couple of hours later, Benji lay awake in the bed, staring out the tiny window at the star-studded sky. The room actually seemed to be getting smaller, if that were at all possible…

 

Benji had always had a fear of enclosed spaces. As a child, he'd spent every day and most of the night outside on the beach. His cabin on the ship was the largest even when he wasn't captain, and even then he'd slept on the deck. Now, here, it felt like there was hardly any room to breathe.

 

Very carefully, Benji lifted Miguel's head off his chest, and placed it on the pillow. Then he stood up, wrapped the quilt gently around Miguel, and left silently.

 

Outside, Benji settled under a tree near Miguel's doorway and stretched out with his arms beneath his head. Much better, he thought, and fell back to sleep.

 

XXX

 

The next morning, Benji awoke slowly, his mind registering a weight on his chest. He opened his eyes and blinked sleepily, looking down to see Miguel lying next to him. All four of the redhead's limbs were wrapped rightly around his lover, his head resting on Benji's shoulder. Benji smiled and kissed Miguel's forehead. Miguel's brow furrowed, and in his sleep he snuggled closer to Benji's side.

 

They lay like that for quite a while before Miguel finally woke up. He tilted his head to look up at Benji, smiled, and laid his head back on Benji's shoulder.

 

“What are you doing out here?” Benji asked softly after several minutes of comfortable silence.

 

Miguel didn't speak for awhile, and when he did, he sounded almost…tearful. “I woke up and you weren't there.”

 

“…Oh…I'm sorry. I just…needed to get outside.”

 

“It's okay. I don't mind. Just…wake me up next time, okay? I thought you left again.”

 

“Well, technically I did, but I only left the house, not the island. You actually think I'd leave?” He chuckled and kissed the top of Miguel's head. “You're crazy.”

 

Miguel smiled. “I know.” He turned his head so his chin rested on Benji's shoulder and looked into the chocolate brown eyes in front of him. “Love you.”

 

Benji grinned and kissed the redhead gently. “I love hearing that.”

 

The two lay there for a while, with Benji staring thoughtfully out at the ocean. After a while, Miguel said, “You really miss it, don't you?”

 

“Hmm? Oh…yeah.” Benji smiled briefly at Miguel and then turned his eyes back to the ocean. “Yeah, I do.”

 

More silence, and then Miguel shocked Benji out of his reverie when he say up, looked down at Benji, and smiled. “So let's go.”

 

Benji pulled his eyes away from the ocean and looked at Miguel, grinning. “What?” he asked, as though it were the most ridiculous thing in the entire world.

 

“Let's go.”

 

“Go where?”

 

“Out there.” Miguel waved his hand, taking in the entire ocean with the gesture.

 

“Out to sea?”

 

“Yep. On your ship.”

 

The smile left Benji's face. He sat up. “Are…you serious?”

 

“As a heart attack.”

 

“You and me?”

 

“And the crew.”

 

“The crew?”

 

“Well, yeah. Trying to sail a ship that size without a crew could be potentially problematic.”

 

Benji didn't say anything. He just sat there, staring at Miguel.

 

Miguel looked down and smiled sheepishly. “Say something.”

 

“Uh…Miguel. No.”

 

“Huh?”

 

“No. My answer is no.”

 

“What? Why?”

 

“It just is.”

 

“Benji—”

 

“Miguel, stop.”

 

“Why?”

 

“Because I'm asking you to.”

 

“But why no? I mean—”

 

“Miguel, please.”

 

“Fine.”

 

There was a tense silence, and Miguel leaned back against the tree while Benji stared out at the shore. “It's great of you to offer,” Benji said after quite a long while, and Miguel knew that was as close to an apology as he was going to get. “And I appreciate it.”

 

“But?”

 

“But…I can't do that to you.”

 

“Huh?”

 

“You have a life here, Miguel. Friends. A home. I can't pull you away from all that. And I'm sure as hell not leaving without you.”

 

“What are you talking about? I have nothing here. I can leave at any moment and no one would miss me, and I definitely wouldn't miss them, and I'm not gonna watch you rot away on some stupid island where you don't want to be when we could both easily be somewhere else. You wanna go, I wanna go, and you and I both know I can be worse than any woman when I want something. You're not talking me out of this, Benny.”

 

Benji couldn't really think of a reply, so he just said, “You're the only person in the entire world who can get away with calling me Benny.”

 

Miguel laughed. “So does that mean you've changed your mind?”

 

Benji's reply was in the form of a long, soul-searching kiss. “I love you, Miguel.”

 

“Love you, too. C'mon, let's go get some food. And find the guys.”

 

As Miguel started to stand, Benji grabbed his hand and pulled him back down, pulling him into another kiss.

 

XXX

 

Florin Port

 

“Yomi, please let me come with you.”

 

Yomi sighed. “Kurama, I told you what this island does to people. By the time I get there, Hiei won't be the same person you knew. I don't want you to see him like that.”

 

“Yomi—”

 

“You're staying. End of story. Consider it an order.”

 

“You can't just—”

 

“When Karasu's gone, I can `just.'” Yomi saw the look on Kurama's face and knew that the redhead was going to cause him much physical and emotional agony starting in about ten seconds. “Kurama, I'm sorry. I know you're angry at me and I know how much you would love to hit me right now, but please don't. I'm doing this for Hiei and for you.”

 

“For Hiei?”

 

“Kurama, Hiei has been on that island for a long time. If it were a normal island, it wouldn't seem like a long time, but on this one, it is. I told you that when I get to him he won't be the same Hiei you knew, but I'm hoping that once I get him off the island he'll start to…get his mind back. But seeing you right away, having you asking him questions about if he's all right and having you right there so suddenly…it will be too much for him.”

 

“But—”

 

“It's not your fault. I would do the exact same thing if I were in your position, but I'm not, and as such I have to be the clear thinker in this situation. You're staying.”

 

Kurama opened his mouth to say something, but he suddenly closed it again. What Yomi was saying made sense. “I hate it when you're right,” he said at last.

 

Yomi smiled. “Thank you.”

 

“Go away before I change my mind and decide to kill you after all.”

 

“Right. I'll see you when I—when we—get back.”

 

“Come back without Hiei and I really will kill you.”

 

“Duly noted.”

 

XXX

 

Cuba

 

“I love that we have a bird,” Benji said as a large hawk landed on Miguel's arm.

 

Miguel smiled and held his arm out next to a large wooden barrel. The hawk jumped onto the barrel and Miguel untied a letter from its leg. “It's from Kurama,” he said after a moment. He held the letter to Benji. “Hawk actually got there.”

 

“The guy said he would.”

 

“So what's it say?” Miguel asked after Benji had read in silence for a bit.

 

“Oh…he says that he'd glad to hear from us and that we're okay…he can't wait to meet you…and…we can call off the search for Hiei.”

 

“Huh?”

 

“You remember that guy I told you about? Yomi?”

 

“Karasu's right-hand man? Yeah.”

 

“Well, apparently he's changed completely. He's going to go get Hiei and bring him back to Florin. Kurama wants us to come to the palace right away.”

 

“Can we get away with that?”

 

“Yeah, Karasu's gone for six months and the servants have all agreed not to tell him anything because they hate him.”

 

“Well, that's always nice.”

 

“I think so.”

 

Miguel laughed. “So when do we leave?”

 

“Just let me answer this and then we're out of here.”

 

“I'll get the guys and meet you at the docks in half an hour.”

 

XXX

 

Gilligan's Island

 

When Yomi finally got to the island, he had the captain of the ship drop anchor far off the coast, then went the rest of the way in a smaller boat.

 

It was quite a long while before he found Hiei. He was sitting in a little clearing in the middle of the island. Talking to a coconut.

 

Oh, dear God.

 

“Hiei?”

 

Hiei jumped, tossing the coconut in the air. It rolled under a bush, and Hiei panicked. “Kurama? Where did you go?” He spotted Yomi standing at the edge of the clearing. “YOU! WHAT DID YOU DO WITH KURAMA?”

 

“Oh…uh…” Yomi hurried over and grabbed a coconut off the ground. “Um…here he is.”

 

Hiei blinked as Yomi placed the coconut in his hands, then threw it at Yomi in disgust. It his the six-eared man's head and bounced off. “Are you insane? That's a coconut!”

 

“…Oh. Right. I'm sorry.” So Yomi went over to the bushes and searched for the coconut. He found it, placed the banana peel back on it, and went over to hand it to Hiei, who immediately grabbed it and clutched it close. “Hiei…we have to leave here, all right?”

 

Hiei's eyes snapped to Yomi's face. He shook his head and began to back away slowly.

 

“Hiei, what…?”

 

“Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale, a tale of a fateful trip…” Hiei began singing softly.

 

Yomi blinked. “Hiei…is there something wrong?”

 

Hiei looked up, and his grip on the coconut loosened slightly. “I'm insane, remember?” he asked, with a flash of his old humorless personality. “Where have you been?”

 

“Oh. Right. Sorry.”

 

“Quite all right. I forget sometimes, myself.” Then Hiei began to sing again. “That started from this tropic port aboard this tiny ship…”

 

“Hiei?”

 

“The mate was a mighty sailor man, the skipper brave and sure…”

 

“Hiei, if you're aware that you're insane, can't you…do something about it?”

 

Hiei looked up again, looking quite confused. “Who are you? And who said anything about me being insane? That's mean…”

 

“Right…well, Hiei, I'm sure you're getting sick of this island, so…”

 

“What island?”

 

“Uh…this one.”

 

“Oh. This one.” Hiei looked around. “Yes, it's very nice.”

 

“Yes…well…Hiei…look, I know you don't remember me—”

 

“Of course I do. You're Yomi.”

 

“Er…yes. Yomi.”

 

“Hmm? What about Yomi? Who's Yomi?”

 

“Um…I am. I thought we established that already.”

 

“Oh. You're Yomi. Nice to meet you.”

 

Yomi sighed, placed his head in his hands, and muttered, “That's it, I'm killing Karasu.”

 

“Hmm?”

 

“Oh…nothing. Listen, Hiei…would you mind coming with me?”

 

“Oh…of course.”

 

“Good.”

 

A few minutes later, after restarting the whole conversation two or three times, Hiei and Yomi were climbing into the boat. Hiei gave no indication that he realized he was actually in a boat, except to hum his song a little faster and a little louder, as though that would keep him sane. Or insane, depending on your point of view.

 

On the ship, Yomi put Hiei in a bed in one of the cabins, Hiei still clutching the coconut. Hiei had fallen asleep about thirty seconds after they left the shore, and was completely unresponsive. Yomi supposed this was all part of the process and, hopefully, Hiei would be at least partly sane when he awoke.

 

Sighing, Yomi yelled the order to head home.