Fan Fiction / Zoids Fan Fiction ❯ ARG MATIE! ❯ Part Three: In Which Two Brothers Face Off and Moon of the Bay (Sort Of) Strikes Back ( Chapter 3 )

Moonbay: (Sniffle) I can't believe…(hiccup) that girl!!! That was so rude of her to say those things!! (In disbelief)

Prozen: (Stretched out on his bed, arms resting comfortably behind his head) I'd pay attention to your heart-wrenching predicament and all, but you're really not my type…

Moonbay: (Mutters into her 78th tissue) Bastard…

Prozen: Take no offense personally; it's just that the whole female race sickens me.

Moonbay: (Stands up suddenly) EXCUSE ME, BUT I'M FEMALE SO I THINK I SHOULD BE OFFENDED!! AND YOU ACT LIKE WE'RE A DIFFERENT SPECIES!! (Scoffs) `DIFFERENT RACE!?'

Prozen: (Rolls eyes) See, this is why women bother me. They're either all `girl power!' or wussy crap-for-craps. It's ridiculous…

Moonbay: (Goes from anger to shock) Huh? What the…

Prozen: (Quirks an eyebrow) What?

Moonbay: (Gets in Prozen's face and thonks his head a couple of times) I think your brain is slowly unbutchering itself…

Prozen: (Ponders)…(Evil smirk) Perhaps it is! (Stands up) I feel refreshed! Rejuvenated! Revived!

Moonbay: (Snickers at the author) Too bad, so sad…

Author: (Wailing) NOOOOOO!! MY PERFECT BUTCHERING!!!!

Moonbay: (Shakes head and turns to Prozen) Hey…WAIT! DON'T GO OUT YET!

Prozen: (Opens door) …

Everyone: (Freeze) …

Prozen: …

Everyone: …

Prozen: (Raises a hand) It's ok, every pathetic one. I am once again the Great Prozen, evil ambitions and all! You see-

Raven: (Steps out from behind Van) O.O

Prozen: It's just that-that-eh-that-

Author: (Sprinkles magic butchering dust over Prozen's head) heheHE!

Van: (Raises an eyebrow) …

Prozen: (Blink. Blink) … (@_@) Teehee! (Clasps hands together) I feel all girly and oozy-gooey again!

Everyone: o.O

Prozen: (Immediately goes and glomps Raven) I LOFF YOOOO I LOFFFF YOOOOO!!! (Snuggle) Anhyummmmmm!!

Raven: ACK!

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~ARG MATIE! A Zoids Guardian Force Comedy ~

~Part Three: In Which Two Brothers Face Off and Moon of the Bay*sorta*Strikes Back~

~By The Devious D/Chick~

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Irvine: (Locks door to Captain's Quarters) There…that should do for now…

Raven: (Sighs in relief) Good…

Prozen: (Yowls inside his quarters. The door shakes with a thump as he hits it)

Van: o.O Such desperation.

Moonbay: (Kitsune smile) Ahh, but yo~o for-go~ot meee!!

Irvine: (-_-) Oh crap, not you again.

Van: (Takes one of Moonbay's hands in a sincere manner) I am truly sorry for my (cough) girlfriend's behavior earlier. Will you ever forgive her?

Moonbay: (Touched) Ah!

Van: (Gives an adorable smile with shoujo bubbles floating in the backgound)

Moonbay: … (Snaps out of her moment with a sour face) What!? (Scoffs) Of course not!

Van: (Face drops) … (Shakes head and walks away)

Fiona: (Grins at Moonbay triumphantly with crossed arms) Too bad for you, Oh Moon of the Bay!

Moonbay: (Snarls)

Cute Schubalts: (Checks his watch) Umm, hello, are we ever going to face off in the next TWENTY YEARS!?

Ugly Schubalts: Umm, Carl, you're not wearing a watch.

Cute Schubalts: … (Checks again) Oh, right.

Irvine: (Throws a fist up in the air with a mic in the other) AWWW-RIIIGHT! (Big chord of music) WHO'S READY TO SEE TWO GUYS KICK THE CRAP OUT OF EACHOTHER!?

Everyone: ME, OH ME OH ME!

Irvine: (Stupid grin) LET'S GOOOO!!!

***The scene changes***

Crew: (Circling the Brothers) OH YEAH! BEAT `EM UP!

Van: (At the Judge's table) I think Irvine's getting a little too into this.

Fiona: (Seated to the right of Van) Just what do you mean?

Moonbay: (To the left of Van) Yeah, whadya mean?

Fiona: (Glares at Moon of the Bay)

Moonbay: (Glares back)

Van: (Sighs and shakes head) …Giving the Schubalts' Olympic scorings for beating each other senseless…

Fiona: (Picks up her stack of signs) What's so wrong with that?

Moonbay: Yeah, what's so wrong with it? (Holds up the 10 sign) Woo! Perfect score for Van's topless bod!

Van: Since when did you like me? And I'm not topless.

Fiona: (Pokes Van's tummy) Might as well be…

Moonbay: (Shrugs) I think the author sprinkled some of that butchering dust on me. It's bad stuff, I tell you.

Irvine: (Leans in toward the table) Huh-HUM! If we could just cut the chit-chat and get on with our fight!

Van Fiona and Moonbay: RIGHT! SORRY!

Cute Schubalts: (In a fighting stance across from his brother, teeth bared, topless, and very glisteningly sweaty) ARGGG!!! I WILL BEAT YOU, UGLY BROTHER!

Fiona and Moonbay: (Hold up the 10 sign) OH YEAH! GIVE IT TO MAMA!

Ugly Schubalts: (Makes a stupid muscleman pose, grinning like a fool. Also topless, but not…very appealing) OH YEAH, WHO'S SEXY NOW!?

Moonbay and Fiona: (Make "eww" faces with 3.0 signs) Ughhh…

Thomas: (Throws up fists) YAHOO. GO…(puzzled)…ME?

Commando Guy: (Jumps up and down) Hey, guess what everyone!?

Everyone: (Turn to Commando Guy) What?

Commando Guy: THE AUTHOR GAVE ME A NAME!

Everyone: …

Commando Guy: You see, my REAL name is HERMANN!!

Everyone: …

Hermann: …eh…yeah…it's Hermann…don't…forget it…

Irvine: (Coughs) uh, OK THEN! ONTO THE FIGHT!

***The Scene changes again…The Brothers are now FACED off and ready to rumble***

Cute Schubalts: (Makes the first move) BIFF! ZONK! CRUNCH!

Ugly Schubalts: (Strikes back) POW! WIFF! ZAM!

Cute Schubalts: (At it again) BLAM! RINT! DING!

Ugly Schubalts: (Bounces back) KAPOW! UMPHH! FLOOP!

Cute Schubalts: (Rears up) KACK! LINT! JURNK!

Ugly Schubalts: (Doesn't give up) PANG! RARF! ERNK!

Cute Schubalts: (…at it again…) WHACK! THWACK! SMACK!

Ugly Schubalts: (Burning with fiery rage) TONG! ZONG! KRONG!

Cute Schubalts: (Bares teeth) KRACK! GACK! RACK!

Ugly Schubalts: (Screws up face) PLONG! FONG! YONG!

Cute Schubalts: (Stops punching and spits out words) GRACK YACK HACK!

Ugly Schubalts: (Does the same) RONG TRONG FLONG!!

Cute Schubalts: FACK SCHMACK PRACK LACK RHACK DACK BRACKKK!!!

Ugly Schubalts: GRONG DRONG PONG DONG CONG HONG KRONG JONG!!!!

Cute Schubalts: JACKGACKSCHPACKMRACKTACKYAHCKWACKMACK!!!!!

***In which the author stops the fight because she can't think of any more sound FX***

Irvine: (Booming announcer voice) My, that was…eh, intense!

Moonbay: (Raises up a 9.5 sign) 9.5 for Cute Schubalts! Nice rhyming!

Cute Schubalts: (Dashing smile) I know, I'm so great.

Moonbay: …And also for the fact that…umm…

Fiona: (Rushing out to Ugly Schubalts) Ohmigosh! Are you ok!?

Ugly Schubalts: @.@ (The ponies dance around his head)

Moonbay: Yeah…

Irvine: We-e-e-e-ellll folks, it looks like our victor is…CUTE SCHUBALTS!!

Cute Schubalts: (Turns into a poser) Oh yeah, you know you want it…

Everyone: HOORAY! YAHOO! YIPEE!

Garu Wannabe: (Shakes his big fat butt)

Hermann: Umm, why are you doing that?

Garu Wannabe: It's called the ceremonial Garu-Wannabe dance of eternal victory!

Hermann: …

Garu Wannabe: Cool, huh? (Lets out a whoop)

Thomas: MY. BASE. OF. CREATION. IS. A. WIMP. (Scowls)

Fiona: (Forgets Ugly Schubalts and glomps Van) Yeeeee! That was fun!

Van: (Sulks) Why did I have to judge? I didn't want to judge for two guys!

Fiona: (Snuggles) Why not?

Van: Because! I'm not…that…way!

Raven: (Sneaks up behind Van's chair)…

Fiona: Whatever…they have madd rhyme skills though, you gotta admit.

Raven: (Jumps over chair and into Van's lap, next to Fiona) Yeah, but my skills are madder!

Van: ACK!

Raven: (Kitsune smile) Maybe I can show you later, ne?

Van: EWWW!! NO!!!

Moonbay: (Observing) o.O

Irvine: What will happen to the Schubalts brothers? Will Cute Schubalts stay a poser forever? What is this butchering dust? Where's Prozen? What is up with Garu-Wannabe's dance? Where did these madd rhyming skills come from? AND JUST WHAT DOES RAVEN MEAN BY HIS MADDER SKILLS!?!?

Fiona: (Shudders) I'd rather not know…