Fan Fiction ❯ A BUNCH of Random DMC Fics ❯ What Would You Do For A Klondike Bar? ( Chapter 3 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

I don't own DMC!!

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Neko: Hello I'm Neko and I'm hosting `What would you do for a Klondike bar?'! Let's roll the video!

*Screen Fades*

~Devil May Cry 1: Dante~

Neko: Dante what would you do for a Klondike bar?

DMC 1 Dante: I don't eat those things!

Neko: Oh!

~Devil May Cry 1: Trish~

Neko: Trish, what would you do for a Klondike bar?

Trish: Uhh… I wouldn't kill Dante!

Neko: Uhh…just to tell you Trish in the end of DMC 1 you become Dante's assistant and in DMC 2 your in the game!

Trish: Oh…

Neko: Would you let me wear you sunglasses?

Trish: Sure! *Gives Neko sunglasses*

Neko: Sweet!

Trish: *Eating Klondike bar happily*

~Devil May Cry 1: Nelo Angelo~

Neko: Nelo what would you do for a Klondike bar?

Nelo: I'd kill Dante!

Neko: You tried that and it all failed!

Nelo: -_-+ Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr…

Neko: TAKE IT!! *shoves Klondike bars to Nelo and runs away*

Nelo: ICE CREAM!!!!

~Mundus~

Neko: Mundus? Uhhh you're too tall!

Mundus: *Sits down*

Neko: What would you do for a Klondike bar?

Mundus: Wipe out Sparada's entire family except Virgil!

Neko: You tried that and just plain sucked at doing that job!

Mundus: I'd then rush you!

Neko: *Pulls out stone carver kit*

Mundus: Never mind!

~DMC 2~

Neko: Dante what would you do for a Klondike bar?

DMC2 Dante: I still don't eat those…

Neko: Not much change there!

~Lucia~

Neko: Lucia what would you do for a Klondike bar?

Lucia: I'll have to think about that…

Neko: Would you let me play with your swords?

Lucia: Sure, just be careful.

Neko: *Starts doing attacks in the air with swords*

Lucia: O.o That took me five years to learn how to do that!

~DMC 3~

Neko: Dante what would you do for a Klondike bar?

DMC3 Dante: KLONDIKE BAR!! OH, I WANT ONE!!!

Alexis and DMC3 Dante: *Happily eating Klondike bars together*

~Virgil~

Neko: Virgil what would you do for a Klondike bar?

Virgil: Hmmmmmmmm…

Neko: Would you try not to kill your brother?

Virgil: Hell no! Now give me the Klondike bar!!

Neko: Fine! TAKE IT! *Gives Klondike Bar* *Walks away* At least I tried…

~Lady~

Neko: Lady what would you do for a Klondike bar?

Lady: -_- ……….

Neko: Would you get out of that stupid outfit?

Lady: No… Now give me the damn Klondike Bar!

Neko: *Already gone*

~Jester~

Neko: Jester what would you do for a Klondike bar?

Jester: I don't know cat-girl!

Neko: Would you juggle?

Jester: Sure! *Starts juggling*

Neko: *Secretly placing TNT in a ball* Here! *Throws TNT ball to Jester*

Jester: *Keeps Juggling*

Neko: 3, 2, 1…

*BOOM!*

~Cerebus~

Neko: Cerebus what would you do for a Klondike bar?

Cerebus: I'd throw you ingot the fiery abyss!

Neko: O.o Nice puppy… Don't hurt me… *Places 3 Klondike Bar boxes on ground* Hehe… JUST DON'T HURT ME!!!! *Runs away*

Cerebus: *Wolfs down Klondike Bars*

Left/Right Cerebus Head: BRAIN FREEZE!!!

Middle Cerebus Head: My belly hurts!! I need someone to rub my belly! *Looks for Neko*

Neko: *Is 5 miles away from Cerebus*

Cerebus: NO!! COME BACK!!!

~Other DMC People~

Neko: Sparda what would you do for a Klondike bar?

Sparda: Hmmm…

Neko: *Blinks*

Sparda: I would defeat Mundus, seal him away, marry a human, have two sons that try to kill the other and enjoy my time!

Neko: Uhh… Sparda you've already done that!

Sparda: Uhhh appear in one of my sons games?

Neko: Done that already too!

Sparda: Oh…

Neko: Anyways here's a Klondike Bar! ^-^

Sparda: Thank you

~Eva~

Alexis: Eva what would you do for a Klondike bar?

Eva: (A/N Yes Dante & Virgil's Mom) *Shrugs shoulders*

Neko: Anything?

Eva: ^-^ Make sure my sweet little boys get along!

Neko: *Sees Dante and Virgil trying to kill each other* *Points* Well you can do that now!!

Eva: *In demonic voice* BREAK IT UP YOU TWO!!

Dante and Virgil: *Stops fighting* Yes Mother….

Neko: Here Eva! *Hands Klondike Bar*

Eva: *Smiles* Thank you Sweetie!

*Screen Fades*

Neko: Well I hope you enjoyed this! *Pulls out list* Shit! I missed some of the DMC enemies! I better get -

Dante: NO MORE!!!

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Damn! It took me 1 day to write this on paper but it took me 2 months to type it out!! I've been busy with other shit!! Hehehe… *Stomach growls* I'm hungry…. Review if you like!!