Fan Fiction ❯ Das Yooper! ❯ You Might Be From Michigan If ... ( Prologue )

Das Yooper!

Prologue:

(You Know You're from Michigan If…)

Ack! What a day! Well I have finally arrived in 'Troll' country! (>_<!) And come to find out my MOTHER was born a Troll (0.0) I can't believe my ears how sad … okay so there really isn't THAT much of a grudge between the upper and lower peninsulas but ya gotta admit, it would be fun if there were. Ha ha we should have a mini civil war to see who'd win … (¬_¬) probably the lower Pen. 'cause they have Detroit and I mean c'mon, some of those kids are BORN with guns in their hands! I KNOW … I know it isn't THAT bad in Detroit but it is one of those stereotypes that is fun (and FUNNY) to rip on! (XD) but anyhoo … aw DAMN! I completely forgot to intro myself!! (>.<;;;) I am Ferris (don't even say Bueller unless you want the taste of my foot in your mouth) (>={ ) Cameron (yeah I KNOW the irony) (¬__¬;;) Luna (don't ask me the ethnic origins … I've asked that question many times myself!) and I am, finally, going AWAY for college (^_____^) THANK GOD!!! And what an interesting name to say … ALMA … it sounds cool! It is a fairly small (meaning expensive >.<) college (scholarships are a blessing) (^__~) it is one of those religious colleges I guess …well I mean if one of the more popular Academic path is a Major in Religious Studies with a minor in Christian Education … it makes you wonder! but believe me I would NOT be going there without GOOD reason! (Cough, scholarships, cough) I'm not an Atheist or anything … I believe there is SOMETHING but I don't know what, so the idea of spending an entire day listening to someone tell me what I should think or that I am going to burn in hell because of "sinful" acts (which includes THINKING about sex!!) (>.<) I find that so asinine! So needless to say I'm not a "good little church going boy!"

***

Boy oh boy, time flies when you are slightly apprehensive about your destination … (>_>). We are now thirty miles from Alma! Hmm I wonder if the College is named after the town or if the town grew up around the college ::flips through his many brochures:: AH here we go … "Alma Facts … In more than 100 years since its founding, Alma has stayed true to its roots by keeping its Scottish heritage … (o.0;;)… alive. Today, Alma features a marching band clad in Kilts … (::busts up laughing his little ass off::)

"What's so funny dear?" … Huh? Oh it's my mom! Guess I was laughing a little too much, my mom took notice and she gave me that "is everything alright with you/are you on drugs" tone, OH, OH now I'm getting the matching look! Better say something so she won't pull the car over at the next rest area and check to see if my pupils are dilated!

"Ha, oh, its nothing mother, just some of these 'quick facts' about Alma, like the fact the marching band wears …Kilts … bah hah hah hah!" okay NOW she is laughing with me … so I am safe for the moment … I DON'T do any drugs 'cept for the occasional allergy meds … but it has gotten fairly difficult convincing my MOM of this. So I do everything in my power to keep her from getting to that subject, cause half the time when she starts her nagging/lecturing I just want to yell 'ALRIGHT YOU CRAZY WHORE, IF I TELL YOU I AM DOING A LITTLE BIT OF EVERYTHING WILL YOU BACK OFF!' okay so I would never say THAT in particular to my MOTHER but it would be something like that! Now back to the wonderful world of Alma College! Some of the things they consider 'exciting' I find to be one of those … um-okay … moments! Like this passage for example … "and even our own official tartan!" ::cheesy grin:: okay what the fuck is a tartan anyways and why the hell is an "official tartan" such a big whoop!? Eh ::shrugs:: I am quite positive I will be enlightened soon enough!

"You are now entering Alma, Michigan" great ::rolls eyes:: now my mom is giving me a little bit of a geography lesson (>_>;;)

"Did you know, dear, that Alma is only one hour north of Lansing!? THE STATE CAPITOL! In the center of the Lower Peninsula!!??" don't know why my mom is so excited she hasn't lived in the lower pen. Since like forever. Actually this is the most she has spoken to me since we started our drive. Well you see my parents both wanted me to go to Lake Superior State University! I had a full ride there too but … (->__>-) I was sorta following someone here … only to find out she got engaged to some guy I don't know and dropped out of college all together (got herself pregnant or something) oh well, she stopped talking to me half way through last year anyway guess I should have guessed something like this would happen … so NOW I'm stuck far enough away from home that practically NO ONE I would know is going here AND I am … well ::blush:: I am really kinda shy, when it comes to people I don't know! So HOW I will make ANY friends here is beyond my comprehension I just thank GOD I got a single! Well you see it is the opinion of many masculine guys that I am too effeminate and the opinion of many effeminate guys that I am too masculine … so having either as my roommate would have sucked cause they would HATE me! Okay so maybe on top of shy you can add paranoid but I mean hey, better safe than sorry!

***

HUZAAH! We have reached my dorm … it is called 'Bruske Hall' lmao! That sounds so manly! N'est ce pas!? My Mother helps me carry my stuff to my room … it is on the fourth floor! I let her carry the monitor to my computer (XDDD) I am so evil to my mother … but despite the fact she gets on my nerves … a lot! I still love her! Well finally all of my stuff is pilled up in my doorway and my mother is FINALLY going to leave! THANKYOU!! I watch her pull away … now how in the world DID we fit all of my crap into the back of that little gray Escort!? Oh well, I throw my duct taped beanbag chair into the center of my room and plop down on it!

"AAAAAAAAAAAAH!" it feels good to be alone! I live in a quad … basically that would be a cluster of rooms surrounding a center bathroom! And without putting much thought into it I leave MY door to the bathroom open. That was my first mistake! Out of NO WHERE a guy bursts into my room looking around a bit. He is fairly tall … I'd say I have a few inches on him. His hair was clean-cut blonde (it even has that "trendy spike" to it!) his eyes, the all American blue (>.<) he looks like the typical jock … GREAT (please note my heavy amounts of sarcasm!) he is wearing a typical "wife beater" shirt and a pair of stonewashed relaxed fit jeans. Oh great, I start to feel anxious when his eyes finally fall upon me, I must have been quite the site! My yellow-green eyes wide, cause I am fucking uncomfortable with this stranger barging in on my room! My black hair with, I think, red highlights in it (lost track I change it so much) disheveled cause I haven't brushed it since this morning! (>.>;;) I KNOW I look terrible, without much sleep I must look like the ultimate Goth! I am wearing a black (slightly tight) Loveless Symphony[1] (only my favorite band) shirt and my dark boot cut jeans and black combat boots untied of course (okay so maybe I don't just look a little like a Goth, but I guess the best way to put it is pseudo Goth!)(As close as one can get without actually being considered one by true Goths) he gives me the once over, and then I find myself thoroughly shocked!

"Heeeeeeeeeeeeeey there!" he cried out in loud and clearly flamboyant voice! (o.0) "Aren't YOU cute" I blush, he saunters over to me … I guess that old saying is true you really CAN'T judge a book by its cover … but MAN OH MAN! I am still in shock AND I can't find my voice!

"I'm Todd! And you!?" he asks leaning a little too close for me, I can feel my self glare … ops didn't mean to look so harsh I see him back away. I worry he may think I'm …uh… scared cause of the fact that uh well … (>.>;;;) Y'know …

"Cam-" I squeak, I don't know why I am using my middle name but, eh, ::shrugs:: guess I am going for a clean slate around here! I see him grin.

"First time seeing an ambiguously gay man!?" he asks bluntly (tiny hints of a lisp!) I have to remind myself NOT to imitate him when I answer if I answer! (I have a habit of imitating people when I am uncomfortable … like when I meet new people, it has gotten me into … A LOT of trouble … damn like that time I started imitating a Canadian accent when talking with a bunch of hockey players AND getting my ass kicked for it! I just sort of nod, he shrugs at me.

"That's cool! Most guys would have run out screaming or asked me to leave by now! Are you cool with sharing a bathroom with me!?" he asks me. He is actually very polite and I think I understand why he felt he had to invade my personal space.

"Uh-um … yeah its cool with me, I don't judge, nor do I care what you do in your free time … but just to let you know my room is off limits and that goes for the other guys in this quad!" whoa that came out kinda harsh! He nods at me as if he understood.

"A bit of a loner huh!? I understand I use to be a lot like you! Kinda shy, so I would shut myself away from the world! But just keep in mind you can't continue living your life like that! How can you have any fun if you don't occasionally interact with other members of your species!? Don't answer now! Just think about that, well anyways if you ever want to hang out feel free to come over to my dorm! The door is always open … AND believe it or not I am really good with questions about girls!!" he leaves me with a wink. He was very understanding … and, even though he would kill me if I ever told him, Todd reminds me of my younger brother, Sebastian! Now I am FINALLY alone again I stretch out on my lofted bed and fall asleep … I have a week before MY classes officially start! Yay for having an unconventional major (at least to the common population ::looks snooty::) ah yes Theater! HUZAAH!

To be continued!

Notes: bwuahahaha! This chapter was really one big inner monologue! I don't think I will continue the rest of the story like this unless a large number of you like it this way! But it will pop every once in a while. Much like the other Ferris (from Ferris Bueller's Day Off) he often commentates on what is going on around him! This story is a GIANT mix of a lot of things and ironically one of those things was Phantom of the Opera even though this is completely a realistic story! How realistic you ask!? Well … Alma is a real college and just to specify I don't own Alma or any of its affiliations any resemblance of any of my character's to any real people alive or dead who may have gone to Alma is strictly coincidental … cause I have NEVER in my life been to Alma … please don't get offended! if you DO go there and you find these things offensive … you shouldn't be reading this story if you don't like it! Uhm I think that is all I've got for notes and warnings and whatever! Oh yeah one last note … titles of the subsequent chapters are things that go after the sub-title of this chapter … (You Know You're From Michigan If…) sort of like the whole "you might be a redneck if" sort of thing. Oh yeah Cam isn't REALLY that much of a jerk AND he isn't a homophobe he just doesn't really like people that well … at least until he gets to know them. He is fairly open minded and has a tendency to be delusional (>__>;;)

Cam: "WHAT!?"

Surtout: "cough, delusional, cough"

Cam: "I'm just gonna ignore you!"

Tee hee hee I love playing with their minds XDDDDDD