Fan Fiction ❯ Hubba Hubbad Jade ❯ The 1st story ( Chapter 1 )

Hubba Hubbad Jade

Once upon a time, in a galaxy far, far away, there was... Star Wars! Oops, wrong story, I mean a little goblin monkey girl. Her name was Hubba Hubbad Jade and she had this weird, strange and just plain creepy ability to talk to monkeys, turkeys and other animals whose names, that when pluralized, are spelled with an "-eys" instead of an "-ies".

One day, she was swinging through the mushroom-like trees with her friend Jessatron, when some midget with gray hairs, a mustache and a sock puppet named Ed started throwing pikachus at them. The intruder said, "My name is Mustachio, Mr. L-man Mustachio. I am here to see if any of you rabies-carrying primates would like to meet my cousin, Deanna Joltes, and go out on a date with him."

Of course, Hubbad Jade and Jessatron said no but, Mr. Mustachio introduced them to Deanna anyway. Turns out Deanna was neither a boy or girl, but rather a mixture of both. It said in a high, shrilly voice, "Hello girls. How ya'll doin' today? Now then, would any of you little five-fingered mammals like to come see me at ma' crib t'night?"

Of course, Jessatron's answer was, "Farfies, no!!!" Hubba Hubbad Jade said after her, "Farfies is the just like duh, der and doi, duh!" Mr. Mustachio and Deanna Joltes wondered what exactly a duh, der, doi and farfies was while Hubbad Jade and Jessatron got away while chiming this little ditty, "Hangy Bangy cut my throat at ten o' clock tonight; hang me up, hang me down, hang me all about the town!" Hubba Hubbad Jade and Jessatron escaped from the two crazy people at last and were able to go back to whatever they were doing, that is, if they could only remember what it was again.

Well, a few days afterward, Hubbad Jade and Jessatron were at the beach causing the other people there to jump into the ocean sea. Then all of a sudden, they saw Deanna Joltes and Mr. Mustachio walking on the shore. It appeared that they were talking to someone minute sized. Turns out they were talking to Ed, you know, the sock puppet. He said, "moo moo moo moo moo moo moo moo moo moo moo moo moo moo moo moo moo moo nay moo moo moo moo moo moo moo moo moo!"

Then, Deanna Joltes yelled, "What the dokie squirts is that supposed to mean?!" "Oh nothing, really," answered Mr, Mustachio, "He just likes to say that, ain't it cool?!" "Ohhhh. I see," sighed Deanna, "I see that you're just as loony as that old piece of laundry you call a sock! Geez schmoeez, you are in definate need of psychiatric help because your brain has not been working lately!" Mr. Mustachio asked, "Does that mean I'm dumb, or does that mean I like pork chops?"

Hubba Hubbad Jade and Jessatron burst out laughing upon hearing this strange conversation. Then, they flew away on the wheels of the next airplane that happened to fly too close to the ground, to live another day for another adventure!

The End