Fan Fiction ❯ Life is Cruel ❯ Part 6 ( Chapter 6 )

"Yuichi?" I called out when we finally got inside.

My brother should have been home by then. He had told me that he wasn't going to be that late, but late enough so that he couldn't pick me up.

"I'm in the kitchen, Zesh." He replied.

I hauled Shiro to the kitchen. My brother was definitely shocked that I had brought someone home with me. Even more so because I actually looked happy for once.

"Yuichi, this is my friend Shiro." I introduced him.

"Nice to meet you Shiro. Will you be here for dinner?" Yuichi asked.

I could tell that he wasn't happy about Shiro coming over, and that I was probably going to pay for it later, but at that point, I was too happy to care. At least Yuichi was being pleasant about it.

"Yes, he will." I answered. Yuichi nodded then started to make dinner.

"Umm...we'll be in my room, Yuichi." Then I directed Shiro to my room.

"Nice room." He commented. "Very...dark."

He was purposely stating the obvious and was being silly at the same time. His grin was big and I could tell he was enjoying himself.

"Yeah, I know. My brother did it for me. I like it."

Then I sat on my bed and watched as Shiro examined my room. He looked at my nightstand and noticed the black bunny. I think that the nightstand became its permanent home because my brother always placed it there before he fucked me. Plus, I could look at it perfectly from where I was on the bed and partially forget what was going on. I loved my bunny Innocence.

"A bunny?" He asked. He picked it up and looked at it, then set it back down and picked it back up.

"What are you doing?" I asked. He was being weird. Picking it up and setting it down.

"Well, it's so soft. I have to put it down, but every time I do, I want to pick it back up. Thus, the endless cycle continues."

"Then hold it for a while. I don't mind. It's what I do when I'm not feeling well."

"Thanks Zeshin."

Shiro took a seat next to me. My bed was in a corner so there were two walls to lean against. I sat on my bed sideways and leaned on the wall, relaxing. Shiro sat next to me, holding and examining my bunny.

"Zeshin...can I ask you something?"

"Sure. Go ahead." I responded. Shiro's voice was quiet and I knew it was something he wasn't sure he could ask.

"Why do you live with your brother? I mean, where are your parents?"

"They live somewhere else. A few hours away from here. My mother...her and my dad always forgot about me. I used to think it was because I was the middle child. My brother looks just like my father, and my sister...she used to look just like my mother. I have characteristics from both of them so I used to think that was the reason."

I spoke quietly. The memories were painful, but I wanted, no, needed to tell someone.

"What do you mean your sister 'looked' just like your mother?"

"She died a few months ago...someone killed her." I whispered. Shiro put a comforting hand on my shoulder. "But I don't really want to talk about that." I added quickly. Shiro nodded, waiting for me to continue.

"But after the stuff involving my sister, my brother helped me. He got me new clothes because the ones I had were ripped and torn and I didn't have the money to buy new ones just yet. Then he told my parents about me. It lasted for a day or two...but then my mother called me down one day." As I remembered, I took a breath and forced myself to tell Shiro what happened.

"You can tell me." He assured. Not pressuring, just letting me know he was there to listen.

"And after I was finally happy that my parents were finally talking to me, my mother said that she and my father hated me. That the reason my mother got pregnant so soon after I was born, was because they only really wanted one son. They don't like adopting, therefore they would never put my up for it, and so they forgot about me instead, hoping I would run away." I paused to think.

"I was lucky that my aunt was living with us around the time I was born. My brother was only four, so my aunt was the only one who could take care of me. She moved out after a few years, when I was finally old enough to talk and walk. I was five so my brother helped me, he snuck food for me and comforted me when I had nightmares. Then finally, when he moved out, my sister helped me. Of course, I had already been able to cook for myself and work to get a few bucks to buy what I needed. My parents kicked me out after my mother told me the truth. My brother let me move in with him."

I had never spoken so much at one time. When I stopped, I realized that I had tears running down my face, and Shiro had his arm around me, leaning me into his shoulder.

"I'm sorry, Zeshin. I didn't mean to upset you by asking you such a question."

"It's not your fault. I needed to tell someone. I'm glad it was you."

I looked up at him and smiled. He smiled back, then leaned down and kissed me, tenderly, slowly deepening the kiss. I was startled at the amount of love I found in it and eagerly kissed back, wrapping my arms around his neck. He placed my bunny on the nightstand and wrapped his arms around me, pulling me closer.

"Zesh-" My brother stopped his sentence. He was in the doorway, and there was no doubt that he had seen what was going on.

I was really going to pay for it later.

The two of us quickly moved away from each other. I could see death in his eyes, directed at me. But he smiled anyway and continued.

"Dinner's ready you guys." Then he left the room.

"Come on, we should get in there." Shiro said. He stood, then helped me up and we walked out of the room, into the kitchen.

My brother had made pizza this time. Pizza, again. We'd been having it a lot lately, but this time he made it himself instead of ordering it.

As we sat down, my brother gave me a look that told me he was up to something. I would find out when Shiro left.

I sat down, then Shiro sat next to me on my right and Yuichi across. I felt nervous. The one I loved and the one that raped me and also thought he owned me. He should know that he can't keep me forever.

"So, Shiro. How long have you been dating my brother?" I cringed. He was being forward and using a voice that held the hidden tone that let me know he was pissed.

Shiro looked surprised at the question, but quickly recovered.

"Well actually, we just started today."

"Oh?" Yuichi asked, raising an eyebrow. Shiro had caught his interest. "How did the two of you get together anyway?"

"Well...uh..." I quickly cut in."

"Shiro told me how he felt. And I said that I felt the same." I said. Shiro shot me a grateful glance and began eating his pizza.

"Well then, Zeshin, exactly how do you feel?"

I was really in for it. I couldn't lie, because that would hurt Shiro. I had to tell the truth.

"I love him."

"Really." It was a statement, rather than a question. Then he ate his pizza quickly and left the kitchen. As he left, I realized he knew we were lying about how we got together. I knew that whatever it was he would do to me later, would involve getting me to tell him.

"Thanks a lot, Zeshin. I wasn't sure how to answer that question." Shiro whispered once my brother was out of earshot. I watched him head down the hall and into his room, shutting the door firmly behind him.

"No problem. I didn't think he'd enjoy hearing what really happened anyway." I grinned, making sure Shiro knew I wasn't bitter about what had happened before.

"Hey, didn't you have to call your mother?" I asked.

"Yeah, I should have. But I remembered that this is one of her work days where she's not home for dinner anyways."

"You live alone with her?" I finished off my pizza and took away mine and Shiro's plate, placing them in the dishwasher.

"Yeah. My dad left a while ago, taking my younger brother with him. He was my half brother anyways. My father didn't know that my mother had actually had an affair with someone else and had gotten pregnant from that." Shiro chuckled. "It gave him quite a shock when I yelled that I wasn't his son when we were arguing one time. But enough about that. Do you want to go out and do something?"

"I would...but I probably shouldn't. You can stay if you like."

"Nah, it's okay. I'd probably try and jump you if we stayed here. Brother or not." Shiro grinned. I knew he was only joking and smiled. Pushing away the thought that was bothering me because of Shiro's comment and failing miserably.

He'd probably join us if you did somehow lose control of your hormones...

"Oh shit..." Shiro said.

"What?" I asked. I was worried something bad happened.

"Your face...it's cut from the tree. I hadn't noticed. I'm so sorry." My hand moved up to the right side of my face. It was cut and it had been bleeding but I never noticed. As soon as I realized it, the pain rushed to my cheek and I winced. Shiro came to my side.

"Let's go clean that up." He led me to the bathroom and got a face cloth from under the sink. He ran the cloth under warm water and began to gently clean around the cut, careful not to reopen the wound. I sat patiently on the edge of the tub while he cleaned and put some disinfectant cream on my face.

"There. Feel better?" Shiro asked. I nodded and he stood up. "I'd better get going." He headed to the bathroom door and I grabbed his arm.

"Please, don't go yet." My tone, much to my surprise and dislike, sounded desperate and afraid.

"Huh? What's wrong Zeshin?"

"I...I just don't want to be alone with him yet...I'm not ready..." I said. I quickly slapped my hand over my mouth as I realized what it was that slipped out.

"Alone with whom...? Surely you don't mean...?" Shiro's eyes widened when I looked away at his implication. "Zeshin, what does he do to you? Wait...is he the one that...?" Shiro's eyes widened further and he quickly wrapped me in an embrace. "We have to tell someone, Zeshin."

So Shiro was the first and only person to know what my brother did to me. The only one, because I never told anyone else. I never had a chance.

"No!" I yelled. Shiro pulled away in shock.

"But...he hurt you, you have to tell someone." He insisted.

"You don't understand, there's no proof that he raped me, and even if there was proof that he fucked me at all, there's none saying I didn't do it willingly. It would only make things worse. And I can't leave, he'd just find me. I...need you to stay with me now. That's all I want. Please..." I looked at him pleadingly and hoped he'd agree. He sighed in defeat, realizing there was nothing we could do, and agreed to stay for a while.

We sat in my room. Neither of us said a word and time passed quickly. Shiro had handed me my bunny and I was leaning against him, stroking Innocence like I had so many times before.

It was eight when Shiro said he had to at least call his mother and let her know he would be out late. He left me alone in my room for a few minutes then returned.

"How long do you want me to stay?"

"Forever..." I said. I was no longer reasonable. I was more worried than ever as I thought about what Yuichi would do to me. Worried about what would happen now that someone knew my secret.

"I can't stay forever, Zeshin."

"Then...as long as you can." Shiro nodded and sat behind me and pulled me onto his lap. He placed comforting kisses on my neck and shoulder and I felt my eyes droop, not in sleepiness, but in pleasure as Shiro's kisses became more insistent and I could feel his growing erection on my back.

"Shiro...please..." I begged. I could feel my own erection constricted in the confines of my jeans and boxers.

"Please what?" Shiro whispered teasingly.

I was about to answer when the door to my room was thrown open.

"Yeah, Zeshin. Please what?" My brother said angrily. "I don't know about you, Zeshin, but I certainly don't enjoy being in the house while my brother and his boyfriend are planning to fuck. I think you should leave now Shiro. Zeshin will see you tomorrow." Shiro obediently nodded and kiss my uninjured cheek before getting off the bed and leaving my room. Moments later, I heard the front door shut and I was alone with my brother.

Little did I know, that I wouldn't be seeing Shiro tomorrow. Or ever.

Yuichi turned on the lights that Shiro and I had left off and I noted that he had a rope in his hands.

"Now Zeshin, I'm sure you're aware that I'm angry you brought someone home with you today." He took a few steps forward, about halfway to my bed where I was still sitting. I nodded in answer to his question.

"But what angers me more, is that you lied to me about how you got together. You say he just admitted it, but that cut on your face tells me otherwise." He walked over to me desk and pulled out the chair. It was wooden with no arms.

"Sit." He commanded. I stayed where I was. "Dammit, don't make me come over there." Reluctantly, I walked over and sat on the chair. He quickly pulled my hands behind it and tied my hands, then tied my feet until I was securely fastened to the chair.

"Now," He said. He was standing in front of me, and it was only then that I saw the whip he held in his hand. "If you tell me what really happened. I won't whip you...hard." He grinned cruelly.

"Start from the beginning." He said. Then he whipped me on my chest. Not harshly, but not gently either.

"On the way home...he kissed me. That's how I found out how he felt." Then I stopped, signaling the end of the story. Yuichi growled and whipped me harder.

"That's not everything. If it was, not only does it not explain the cut on your face, but you were late as well." He spat. I sighed and then told him what happened.

"He...raped me against the tree. I slipped and cut my face."

"So then why did you end up together?" He whipped me again for his own amusement. There were tears in my shirt and the skin underneath was red and welted, swelling fast. I could feel the tears in my eyes but did not let them fall.

"Because then he put me on the ground on my back. He apologized and then he..." I stopped, not wanting to continue.

"Tell me." He said. He whipped me fiercely across my left shoulder and I cried out.

"He...made love to me."

"Made love? Unlikely. Probably just told you that as an excuse to fuck you again. Who wouldn't? I would." Then he grinned, and whipped me light enough not to make a permanent mark, but enough to hurt my left cheek.

"You bastard." I hissed.

"Now, now. Would a bastard untie you?" Then he untied me and threw me on the bed, dropping the whip.

I proceeded to turn on my stomach, knowing what was coming. But Yuichi turned me over.

"I'd like to see your face crumple up with pain. And look at me this time, not that damn rabbit."

Then he pulled my pants and boxers off and ripped what was left of my shirt.

He kissed his way down my chest, leaving bite marks almost everywhere and pinching my nipples hard. Foreplay was something he never did. It hurt. But I became aware that I had and erection. It disgusted me.

He put my arms over my head and removed his pants and shirt.

I almost screamed when his mouth wrapped around my cock. Of course I enjoyed it, regardless of who it was. I wanted to push his head down farther, but he had moved my arms for a reason and if I moved them, I would get punished. I bucked my hips instead and he pinned them down.

I was close. So close that it hurt when he removed his mouth.

"A little pleasure before pain." He said. Then he bent his knees and sat back onto his heels, grabbing my head and pulling it forwards, my mouth at the tip of his erection. I knew what he wanted me to do, but I refused.

"Don't try my patience, there's isn't a lot of it right now, and you might want it later." He warned. I unwillingly obeyed and placed my lips over his swollen member, sheathing it in my mouth. I could hear him moan and push my head farther down. I almost choked, but prevented it and began to suck. He moaned loudly as I continued.

It felt like hours before he finally pulled my head off of him. Then he leaned me onto my back again and placed my legs over his shoulders, pinning his arms on either side of me.

"Wait, you forgot the..." I stopped when I saw his grin. He was going to rape me dry. Not even with saliva as lube like Shiro had done, he'd already wiped it off.

Shiro...

He covered my mouth and I screamed as he violently thrust inside of me. I was definitely not a virgin, but it made no difference.

I continued to scream into his hand as he plunged hard and fast, I soon felt something help lubricate inside of me. But it wasn't saliva or his seed.

It was my blood.

But with blood as the lubrication it was like before. It felt good, despite the pain. Yuichi removed his hand when he felt the vibrations of my moan and grinned at me, while continuing the thrusts.

I moaned even more when I felt my release and his.

He pulled out and hurried to the bathroom, coming back with a cloth and wiped the blood away. I was in pain, but he dressed me in clean clothes anyways. Then he stood me up.

And he beat me.

He punched me over and over, on my face, my chest and my stomach. He said various things, scolding me for being with Shiro and for lying. I don't really remember. All I remember is the pain. After a few punches I could no longer stand up and fell to the floor, sobbing in pain.

He kicked me a few times before leaving my room and heading to his.

He's said he was tired and had to get up early the next day.

The pain slowly dulled to a throb about ten or fifteen minutes later. And then I realized that I couldn't live here. The raping I could deal with, but the beating...

That was another story entirely.

I got out of my room and snuck to the front door.

Once I was safely outside, I ran. I ran all the way down the stairs, not bothering with the elevator, until I reached the lobby. I paused to take a breath and a drink from a water fountain, then took off again. I didn't stay long so people wouldn't ask me questions.

I ran for ten minutes before I stopped at a pay phone and called Shiro.

I remember him sleepily answering the phone and asking if I was alright. Before I had a chance to answer, he got another call and switched over. When he switched back he asked me where I was.

And stupid me, I told him.

He switched back over then returned a few minutes later.

"Your brother's coming to pick you up." He said.

I could have killed him. I yelled at him and said goodbye. First telling him that he was an idiot and that I was never going to see him again. But not before he told me.

"I was planning on it. You're too weak and naïve, no wonder your brother could take you so easily. By the way, I don't love you. But at least it let me fuck you, two almost three times. I understand your brother completely and wish I was him." Then I hung up and cried.

Before I got out of hand, I ran. It started raining and soon I was soaked. The whole time I remember thinking,

I wish I had my bunny...

I ran until I found a pick up truck outside a store. It was still running so I hopped into the back of it and waited till it started moving again.

Then I fell asleep.