Fan Fiction ❯ Shatters of a Heart ❯ Part6 ( Chapter 6 )

Shatters of a Heart ~By Lovely-chan~

I checked his CDs and they were all there so I packed his favorite in a box along with mine. I wrote a note for him and placed it inside, then I waited for a while and got bored and decide to wrap the box with whatever I found, moments later he step into the room.

"Yutaka!" His eyes widen; he was obviously surprised to find me waiting for him. His flushed, shameful face hid as he lowered it; I knew he was sorry for what happen and that my dream was only that. "I came for my CDs"

After what happen that was all he could say? My heart bled with the many scars it already had but I managed not to cry. "Here, I packed them for you." I gave him the box and he took it touching my fingers with his. A current ran down my hands with the soft touch of his and I removed them quickly.
"Thanks, you are always so thoughtful."
"Well…I came to say goodbye. I hope you the best; I mean it. Please be happy…promise me." I wanted to cry and asked him why he was being so cruel with me, giving no answers to what happened, to what he felt or why he did it, but I couldn't ask and torture him more than he already was.

The look on his face suddenly changed, like he just decided to forget whatever was troubling him. He lifted my chin to look deep into my eyes and smiled. "What are you talking about? You are coming with me."
"Really?!" I couldn't hide my excitement, his words gave a sparkle of joy to my heart.
"Isn't that what you wanted?"
"Yes!"
"Then let's go!" I jumped to embrace him making us fall on top of his bed while I cried.
"Oh, don't cry or I'll call you the Drama Queen again." We both laughed and I rubbed my eyes to wash the tears away. "That's better. No more tears ok?"
"Ok." I kissed his lips softly and he corresponded, so I got lost in my dreams of love with my beloved.
"Let's hurry, babe."
"Can we go to my place? There are some things I would like to take."
He stood and helped me up. "Of course, I know you want to bring that guitar of yours."
"You know me!"
He wrapped his arms around my shoulders and smiled. "Let's take a walk. It will be our last walk on Earth; we should enjoy it."
"Alright." We walked down the streets embracing each other and all the joy in my heart was impossible to explain. We laughed, we sang and talked on the way to my little home remembering good times and planning our future life together. I felt so happy to listen to his words and know how he wanted to show me his world and hopes for me to love it the same way he does.

He helped me pack my things, only my music sheets, some clothes, and a CD player. "Ready!" I smiled at my angel and he looked amused, so I figured I was forgetting something. "What I left?" I look to the sides. "Oh, the picture of my mom!" He chuckled and said nothing. "What?" Then he looked at the wall. "My guitar!"
"Silly head." He messed my hair up and gave it to me not without giving me a sweet little kiss on the lips. "Say goodbye to your house Yuyu…it's the last time you'll see it."
"Yes…" I looked around and all my childhood memories came back alive and I could have sworn I saw my mother saying goodbye with a smile. "I'm ready!" I hugged him and kissed his chin. "I love you." Then he kissed me long and sweetly as an answer to my confession. "Love me now." I whisper as he ends our loving kiss.
"We have to go, baby. We'll have time for that…I hope."
"What you mean?"
"This is forbidden."
"What is forbidden?"
"Us. There are no homosexual relationships in my planet; it is a sin. Besides…I don't know what am I going to tell my father and my son. Ha! I wouldn't give him a mother but two daddies."
"Daddies are ok…but your father never liked me."
"I guess…I just hope not to get expelled."
"Can they do that?"
"I have no idea, but…I'm the High Angel* maybe that helps. We must hide." He winked to me.
"I don't care for anything…I just want to be with you."
"Me too." He kissed me again rubbing his hands on my back gently.
"Love me…your kisses turn me on Kou."
"That's good." He kissed me some more and then picked me up while I laughed. "You're light as a feather. You are so cute and small...you are my baby now." He was kissing my head sweetly and squeezing my slender body tightly.
"I'm no baby, I'm older than you."
"Well, you look younger and you can't carry me." He smiled and kissed me again. "I'm going to carry you inside our room when we get there…we just had our honeymoon."
"I don't remember getting married."
"We don't get married on my planet, we just live together."
"Convenient huh?" He kissed me smiling and put me down again, then he slaped me on the butt. "Come on! I want to see my child."
"Can you do that again?"
"What? This?" He grabbed my butt again.
"Yeah that." I smiled and he squeezed them again. "Nice."
"Let's go, before I lose my head."

I waved goodbye and walked away with my angel. As we approached the lake a small figure begin to be clear to our eyes. Kouin's smile faded and his steps become slower; I knew something was wrong, so I looked again and it was she. Kai Ling was waiting for Kouin with a bag on her back; he was surprised to see her, I could tell by the look on his face.

He let go of my hand and walked closer to her, but I just stood there watching them in silence. "Kai Ling…what are you doing in here?"
"I'm going with you." She said very secure.
"Says who? I though we already talked about this and we were clear."
"No we are not! You think I don't love you and I do. I love you, Kouin; I want to spend my life with you and our son. We will be a family just like you wanted." I sensed his confusion and noticed he was hurting; she was touching his soft spot, family. He knew he couldn't have that with me so I freaked, he probably still had feelings for her since he had loved her for too long. "I love you Kouin, I don't want to live my life regretting every moment letting you go. Please forgive me Kouin, forgive my foolish heart for not believing you'll return. I love you, that's all I know."
"Kai…" His eyes turned soft, then I knew that was it for us. He walked closer to her and touched her hair lovingly. "I love you too." He kissed her lips slaughtering the pieces left of my broken heart, I couldn't move or cry I was too hurt to even make a sound. I wanted to run away but I waited; I deserved some kind of explanation from him. "Let's go home." He took her hand and walked closer to the lake then he suddenly turned around and my tremors grew up inside. A smile from his heavenly face made me relax and just waited for what he would say. "Are you coming or not?"

That was all I needed to hear; I didn't care anymore if I'll be his friend, his slave, or his lover as long as I'll be with him. "Yes!"

"Then move your legs, we don't have all day!" I still didn't move an inch. He knew I was confused so he walked toward me. "Give me those bags, I'll carry them. You are too slow Yuyu!" He messed my hair just like he always did and winked me an eye, throwing me a kiss. Somehow he was telling me everything would be fine, but I had no idea what he had on mind. He walked ahead of me when a chill came down my spine; I was scared, something was completely wrong; I looked to the side and discover Kai Ling's boyfriend pointing my angel with a gun. I froze for an instant widening my eyes in disbelief, then he shot and all I could do was push my beloved to save him from dying. I loved him too much to let him die, instead I preferred to die in his place; an intense pain followed as I fell bleeding on the ground.
"YUTAKA!" His voice called my name desperate and he ran to my side, but the worry on his face was too painful for my eyes. "Yutaka! Yutaka please don't die! Don't die on me now, don't die!" His voiced sounded so far away, my eyes clouded and I could only make out to see his sea-blue eyes filled with tears. "Yutaka, don't leave me. Don't leave me! We are going home, just like you wanted. Yuyu…we'll be happy together, you and I. I promise…I promise…only you and I."

I tried to touch his face but my trembling arms wouldn't let me, so he took my hand and placed it on his wet cheek kissing the palm of my hand several times. "Go home Kou…be happy."
"Not without you. Maybe I can heal you." He moved his hands to where the shot hit and took out the bullet, but I had bled too much, there was nothing he could do to save me.
"Leave me. Go."
"No. I won't leave you, baby, I won't leave you."
"Go to Kai…she is your family…that's the way it should be. Be happy…be happy…" I closed my eyes and felt how my soul said goodbye to my body.

I could see my angel beside my body crying his heart out. "Come back! Come back to me Yutaka…Yutaka…Yutaka…" Seeing him cry made me realized his true feelings; he loved me. He loved me more than he knew. "Don't leave me alone Yutaka…not again…I need you, I need you. Forgive me, forgive me it was my fault, my fault, my fault! MY FAULT!!"

I felt a strong energy driving me away from the painful scene, and I begged to a God to let me stay with him. Somehow it works since I could hear him clearly now, then I tried to touch him but it was hopeless. I was gone, laying cold in the ground, lifeless.

Kouin stood up with his face bath in tears and a devil look of anger in his eyes. He turned to where Jotaru was standing frozen and scared, and then he yelled as his body explodes with some kind of life force. "You killed MY YUTAKA!!! I would never, EVER forgive you! You'll pay with your own flesh!" He walked closer to him while he dropped the gun on his hands shaking with fear.

I was afraid, I've never seen my angel's eyes filled with hate like he had at that moment. "You bastard!" Kouin grabbed his collar and lifted him up with one arm. "You'll suffer before you die! One killing blow is not enough!" He threw him to the floor and started hitting him, kicking him with all his strength taking Jotaru's helpless body close to death. Jotaru was bleeding badly and he kept taking his anger on him. I cryed in pain seeing my beloved lose his serenity and loved for the others just because of me. It was my fault he suffered, my fault he turned into this evil monster. "Die bastard! Die! Die! Die!" He kicked him again and again till Jotaru fainted and I though he was already dead. "DIE!" He cried as he yelled but Kai Ling didn't say a word or move an inch; she was obviously under a shock just like I was.

Finally she decided to say something to help my dear angel react. "Stop it! Stop it Kouin! You showed me once not to let anger and hate take over our hearts. I know it's horrible what happen and I am not defending Jotaru for what he did. He deserves to be punished but not by your hand, leave that to the laws of this world. Let Yutaka sleep in peace, he wouldn't like to see you this way. Kouin, please be you…be you again. Killing Jotaru won't bring Yutaka back to life, come back Kouin…if you kill him you'll be just like him. Think about our son, about Yutaka, and all the people that love you, none of us like to see you in such a miserable state."

I thank God for giving Kai the right words to bring Kouin back to his usual calmed angelic state. He let go of Jotaru and bent beside me and pulled my lifeless body to his lap pressing me against his chest and leaning his head in mine. "I'm sorry…I'm sorry…" He cried for a while rocking our bodies softly and the sound of sirens made Kai Ling hurry him.

"Let's go Kouin, it's time."

He lifted me up and looked around. "Pick his bags…we are going home." The three of us disappeared and now where inside his transport. He placed me in a capsule and closed it. "We are going home Yuyu just like I promised…like I promised." His tears fell on top of the crystal door of the capsule and his painful gaze was reflected on the glass. "Would you ever forgive me?" He kissed his hand and touched the glass sending me his last kiss of love.

From that day forward a locked door inside Kouin's room hides a treasure. A crystal ball with my ashes placed on a table, my guitar inside a glass, my clothes on the drawers, my lyrics on a folder, and my music played on a CD player.

Every day he walks inside the room, the door was secured with a password so only he could enter. The password was my name, Yutaka. Only I knew what he did inside the room, every day it was the same; he'd look at my stuff, smell my clothes and sit on the bed to listen to my songs. He sang as he cried holding our picture together, then he reads the note I left inside the box of CDs the last day of my life. My last words to him in a simple note he kept as the biggest treasure.

Sometimes love is meant to be,
Sometimes it's a broken heart,
Sometimes love is not enough,
For two lonely hearts to be whole.
Sometimes love finds a way,
Sometimes love tears us apart,
And sometimes loneliness…is for the rest of our lives.

"You were right love." He sighs and places it back inside the box, so many times he read it, he surely knows it by heart, yet he still reads it trying to hold on to a memory. He will listen with his eyes closed the melody of my voice and remembered our only night of love. With a cry, he will slide his hand inside his pants to touch himself till he releases the pain between his legs going back to a night he never forgot.

"I was a fool, all this time…I regret it, I regret I never told you. If could only see you once again I will say it to you my love…my love. I love you, Yutaka, I've always loved you but I never realized it until it was too late." I could hear him, and that was my punishment for loving a celestial being, knowing that none of us reached our dream. He had a family, but not the loved he dreamed and I never saw him happy. We both lose and living in melancholy and bitterness was our fate. My unexpected departure left a scar on his heart, leaving him living on regret for not choosing me instead of her.

Two lonely hearts meet once to become one, it was fate that brought us together. But sometimes love is not enough, sometimes our destiny is a broken heart. Two lonely hearts become one, but at the end were torn apart, leaving inside only a shattered heart.

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