Fan Fiction ❯ The Tower of Randomness ❯ Meltarr ( Chapter 1 )
[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]
By: Nova-san 
Meet Ky, your average police officer with a magical thunder sword and a teacup fetish. Meet Meltarr, your usual ominous sounding disembodied voice.
Anime/Manga: Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Comedy | Type: Alternate Universe | Uploaded On: 03.03.2006 | Pages: 1 | Words: 531 | Visits: 172 | Status: Completed
Meet Ky, your average police officer with a magical thunder sword and a teacup fetish. Meet Meltarr, your usual ominous sounding disembodied voice.
Anime/Manga: Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Comedy | Type: Alternate Universe | Uploaded On: 03.03.2006 | Pages: 1 | Words: 531 | Visits: 172 | Status: Completed
The Tower of Randomness
CHAPTER ONE: MELTARR, THE DISEMBODIED VOICE
Our story begins in the world of Guilty Gear. The author is not sure where that is. So, for the sake of the fic, let’s just call it Earth, okay? Anywhoo, Our Protagonist, a young police officer named Ky Kiske, is walking the beat one day, when he sees a large T.V. in the middle of the street.
Ky: … What the heck? Who would leave a perfectly good T.V. out in the middle of the street?
After a close and thorough inspection, he finds that the T.V. is a Hi-def T.V.; and that it worked.
Ky: … Holy shhh-traw. Who would be dumb enough to leave a HDTV out here? Hmmm… *looks about* There’s no one here. Looks like Christmas just came early.
Ky swipes the T.V. and runs home to his apartment.
Ky: Hehehheh… Sweet. I’ve got this bad-ass HDTV for free. And no one’s the wiser. Now for some Madden 2526.…
As Ky turns on his X-Cube-Station 1080, the HDTV begins to glow eerily.
Ky: Hey, wait a minute… Where’s the E.A. Sports logo? This isn’t right.
A vortex appears inside the HDTV. It begins to pull Ky in.
Ky: Wait, no! DAMN YOU, SONTENDOSOOOOOOOFT!
Ky falls through the vortex and lands in a strange room.
Ky: OW! Damn it! Stupid floor that I’ve never seen in my life…
Ky looks around.
Ky: Uhhh, this is SO not my house…
Voice: OF COURSE IT ISN’T, YOU BUMBLING FOOL!
Ky: AAAAAAHHHHH!!!! Who the hell said that?
Voice: I AM MELTARR! I AM EATER OF TREES! I AM BEATER OF ASS! I AM LOVER OF BALLET!
Ky: … Ballet?
Meltarr: It’s relaxing and soulful. “Swan Lake” is my fave… WAIT A MINUTE! THAT’S NOT IMPORTANT!
Ky: Then why did you mention it?
Meltarr: It slipped out. ANYWAY, I AM SUPREME! BOW TO MELTARR!
Ky: No.
Meltarr: THEN FACE MY UNBRIDLED FURY!
A snowball hits Ky.
Ky: OW! The hell?
Meltarr: MWAHAHAHA! DOES IT HURT, BOY?
Ky: You bastard! When I find you, I’m gonna kick your ass!
MELTARR: OH REALLY?! AND JUST HOW ARE YOU GOING TO FIGHT A DISEMBODIED VOICE?!
(Dun-dun-DUUUUUUNNNNN!)
Ky: Just you wait, you dumb bastard!
Meltarr: I SHALL TELL YOU WHAT! IF YOU CAN CLIMB MY TOWER OF RANDOMNESS AND MAKE IT TO THE TOP, I SHALL INDULGE YOUR LONGING FOR A BATTLE! REMEMBER, I AM MELTARR! THERE IS NONE OTHER! DIRTY SOUTH FOR LIFE! I AM AUDI 5000!
The voice of Meltarr fades away.
Ky: So, that’s all, huh? Hoo boy, I’m gonna kick his ass!
And so Ky begins his journey in the Tower of randomness.
TO BE CONTINUED…
CHAPTER ONE: MELTARR, THE DISEMBODIED VOICE
Our story begins in the world of Guilty Gear. The author is not sure where that is. So, for the sake of the fic, let’s just call it Earth, okay? Anywhoo, Our Protagonist, a young police officer named Ky Kiske, is walking the beat one day, when he sees a large T.V. in the middle of the street.
Ky: … What the heck? Who would leave a perfectly good T.V. out in the middle of the street?
After a close and thorough inspection, he finds that the T.V. is a Hi-def T.V.; and that it worked.
Ky: … Holy shhh-traw. Who would be dumb enough to leave a HDTV out here? Hmmm… *looks about* There’s no one here. Looks like Christmas just came early.
Ky swipes the T.V. and runs home to his apartment.
Ky: Hehehheh… Sweet. I’ve got this bad-ass HDTV for free. And no one’s the wiser. Now for some Madden 2526.…
As Ky turns on his X-Cube-Station 1080, the HDTV begins to glow eerily.
Ky: Hey, wait a minute… Where’s the E.A. Sports logo? This isn’t right.
A vortex appears inside the HDTV. It begins to pull Ky in.
Ky: Wait, no! DAMN YOU, SONTENDOSOOOOOOOFT!
Ky falls through the vortex and lands in a strange room.
Ky: OW! Damn it! Stupid floor that I’ve never seen in my life…
Ky looks around.
Ky: Uhhh, this is SO not my house…
Voice: OF COURSE IT ISN’T, YOU BUMBLING FOOL!
Ky: AAAAAAHHHHH!!!! Who the hell said that?
Voice: I AM MELTARR! I AM EATER OF TREES! I AM BEATER OF ASS! I AM LOVER OF BALLET!
Ky: … Ballet?
Meltarr: It’s relaxing and soulful. “Swan Lake” is my fave… WAIT A MINUTE! THAT’S NOT IMPORTANT!
Ky: Then why did you mention it?
Meltarr: It slipped out. ANYWAY, I AM SUPREME! BOW TO MELTARR!
Ky: No.
Meltarr: THEN FACE MY UNBRIDLED FURY!
A snowball hits Ky.
Ky: OW! The hell?
Meltarr: MWAHAHAHA! DOES IT HURT, BOY?
Ky: You bastard! When I find you, I’m gonna kick your ass!
MELTARR: OH REALLY?! AND JUST HOW ARE YOU GOING TO FIGHT A DISEMBODIED VOICE?!
(Dun-dun-DUUUUUUNNNNN!)
Ky: Just you wait, you dumb bastard!
Meltarr: I SHALL TELL YOU WHAT! IF YOU CAN CLIMB MY TOWER OF RANDOMNESS AND MAKE IT TO THE TOP, I SHALL INDULGE YOUR LONGING FOR A BATTLE! REMEMBER, I AM MELTARR! THERE IS NONE OTHER! DIRTY SOUTH FOR LIFE! I AM AUDI 5000!
The voice of Meltarr fades away.
Ky: So, that’s all, huh? Hoo boy, I’m gonna kick his ass!
And so Ky begins his journey in the Tower of randomness.
TO BE CONTINUED…