Fan Fiction ❯ Titan Park ❯ episode-0.5 ( Prologue )
[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]
By: HyperSonicAdam2 
Jesus comes to Titan Park to fight Santa Claus to find out once and for all who's the true spirit of Christmas. Can the boys end the conflict before Christmas is destroyed and they get killed?
Anime/Manga: Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Comedy / Sci-fi | Type: Alternate Universe | Uploaded On: 03.16.2004 | Pages: 4 | Words: 1.4K | Visits: 311 | Status: Completed
Jesus comes to Titan Park to fight Santa Claus to find out once and for all who's the true spirit of Christmas. Can the boys end the conflict before Christmas is destroyed and they get killed?
Anime/Manga: Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Comedy / Sci-fi | Type: Alternate Universe | Uploaded On: 03.16.2004 | Pages: 4 | Words: 1.4K | Visits: 311 | Status: Completed
Title:The Spirit of Christmas (Jesus vs. Santa)
Setting:Sonic Park, Colorado
Characters:Robin Brovlosky, Beast Boy Marsh, Eric "Cyborg" Cartman, Killer Moth McKormick, Jesus, Santa, Brian Boitano
Type of Story:Humor, Crossover
Rating:R
------------------------------------------------------------------------ -----------------------------------------------------
Well here's the second version of "The Spirit of Christmas". This was created when an executive producer at Fox Network asked Matt Stone, and Trey Parker to create a video Christmas card for his friends. This seemed more like the South Park we know and love more than the first "Spirit of Christmas" did. As Stan, Kyle, Cartman, and Kenny's designs look the way they look today. Cartman is called Cartman and Kenny is called Kenny in this, where they weren't in the first "Spirit of Christmas". Anyway enjoy "The Spirit of Christmas" (Jesus vs. Santa).
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Kids:We wish you a merry Christmas, We wish you a merry Christmas, We wish you a merry Christmas...
Beast Boy: hey wait a minute.
Robin: What?
Beast Boy:Aren't you Jewish, Robin?
Robin:Yeah, I think so.
Beast Boy: Dude, Jewish people don't celebrate Christmas.
Robin:What?
Beast Boy:You're suppose to sing Hanukkah songs!
[pause]
Robin: Dreidel dreidel dreidel, I made you out of clay, dreidel dreidel dreidel...
Beast Boy:He he that's a stupid song.
Cyborg:Yeah, Hanukkah sucks.
Robin: Don't you oppress me, fat boy.
Cyborg: Don't call me fat, buttfucker.
Robin:Then don't belittle my people you fuckin' fatass!
Cyborg:Goddammit don't call me fat you buttfuckin' son-of-a-bitch!
[Jesus floats down from the sky.]
Robin:What the...
Killer Moth:ahhh...
[pulls his hood closed]
Jesus:Behold my glory.
Beast Boy:Holy shit, it's Jesus!
Cyborg:what are you doing in Titan Park, Jesus?
Jesus:I come seeking...retribution.
Beast Boy:[gasp] He's come to kill you cuz you're Jewish, Robin!
Robin:Oh, fuck! I'm sorry, Jesus. Don't kill me.
Jesus:Nay, fear not. I love All My Children.
Robin:[phew]
Jesus:Tomorrow is my birthday. Yet all is not right.
Beast Boy:Your birthday is on Christmas? That sucks, dude.
Jesus:I must find a place called "The Mall".
Robin:Well we can take you to the mall, Jesus.
Beast Boy:Yeah! It's over this way.
[Robin and Killer Moth exit]
Cyborg:Ugh... Goddammit, you stepped on my foot you pigfucker.
Beast Boy: Dude, don't say pig fucker in front of Jesus.
[Beast Boy exits]
Cyborg:Eh, fuck you.
[in front of Titan Park mall]
Beast Boy:Here we are Jesus, Titan Park Mall. Who are you looking for?
Jesus:Him!
[Jesus points to Santa who's sitting with children]
Santa:Ho ho ho. We meet again, Jesus.
Jesus:You have blemished the meaning of Christmas for the last time, Kringle.
Santa:I bring happiness and love to children all over the world.
Jesus:Christmas is for celebrating my birth.
Santa:Christmas is for giving.
Jesus:I'm here to put an end to your blasphemy.
Santa:This time we finish it. [stands] There can be only one.
Beast Boy: Dude, this is pretty fucked up right here.
[Jesus and Santa fight, Mortal Combat style]
[Santa spins Jesus and throws him]
Robin, Beast Boy:Go Santa!
[Jesus looks at them]
Robin, Beast Boy:Uh, go Jesus!
Jesus:[fake Japanese]
[Jesus tosses something at Santa]
[Santa dodges, and the energy hits the "Visit Santa" sign and knocks it down and kills three kids]
Santa:[fake Japanese]
[Santa tosses something and slices Shadows head off]
Killer Moth: Oh no! Ahhhhhhhhh
[Killer Moths head flys off and knocks over a statue and kills three kids]
Robin:Oh my god! They killed Killer Moth!
Santa:Hey you son-of-a-bitch come on.
Jesus:Boys, help me put an end to him once and for all.
Santa:No, boys, help me, so that I can put an end to him.
Jesus:God is watching you, boys. You know who to help.
Santa:Beast Boy, remember the choo-choo when you were three?
Jesus:I died for your sins, boys. Don't forget that.
Beast Boy:I don't know what to do, dude. Who should we help?
Cyborg:I say we help Santa Claus.
Robin:Eh, you're just saying that because he brings you candy.
Robin:Hey! I don't need to take that kinda shit from a jew.
Robin:You're such a fat fuck, Cyborg, that when you walk down the street people go god DAMMIT that kid's a BIG FAT FUCK.
Cyborg:Oh yeah? Well listen up...
Robin:SHUT UP!!
[Jesus, Santa, Robinc, Beast Boy, and Cyborg argue and shout at eachother]
Beast Boy:Wait, wait, just a second. Now we've got to think here. Now let's see. What would Brian Boitano do?
Cyborg:Yeah. What would Brian Boitano do?
[Brian Boitano appears.]
Brian: Did someone say my name?
Cyborg:Brian Boitano!
Robin:What incredible irony!
Cyborg:Yeah, it's Brian Boitano!
Brian:What's going on, kids?
Beast Boy:Okay, Brian? Who would you help in a fight, Jesus or Santa Claus?
Brian:Kids...you shouldn't think of things like that. This is the one time of year when we all try to get along, no matter what we believe in. This is the season just to be good to each other. Bi-eee!
[Brian skates away.]
Jesus:You fuckin' pussy!
Santa:C'mere! Come on!
Beast Boy:Hey, Jesus! You have to understand that Santa is keeping the spirit of your birthday alive by bringing happiness and joy.
Robin:Yeah. And Santa, you need to remember that if it weren't for Jesus, this day wouldn't even exist!
Santa:You're right kids. I'm sorry Jesus.
Jesus:No, no. It's me who should be sorry. I've been a right bastard. I'm sorry Kringle.
Santa:Thank you boys.
Jesus:Yeah, thank you boys. Come on, Kringle, I'll buy you an Orange Smoothie.
Santa: oooo!
[they walk off]
Beast Boy:[phew] That sucked.
Robin:Yeah, but just think. Today we actually met no we actually spoke to the Brian Boitano.
Beast Boy:Yeah. And you know? I think I learned something today, it doesn't matter if you're Christian or Jewish or Atheist or Hindu. Christmas still is about one very important thing:
Cyborg:Yeah, ham.
Beast Boy:No not ham, you fat fuck!
Cyborg:Fuck you!
Beast Boy:Christmas is about something much more important.
Robin:What?
Beast Boy:Presents.
Robin:Ah.
Beast Boy: Don't you see, Robin? Presents.
Robin:Hey man, if you're Jewish you get presents for eight days.
Beast Boy:Wow, really?! Count me in.
Cyborg:Yeah, I'll be a Jew too.
boys:[leaving] [singing]Dreidel dreidel dreidel I made you out of clay dreidel dreidel dreidel with dreidel I will play!
[rats come and carry off Killer Moth's body]
[The End]
------------------------------------------------------------------------ -----------------------------------------------------
Well how did you like the original episode of Sonic Park. Check back soon because I will be getting the first episode of the series up soon. Send all comments, flames, and reviews to HyperSonicAdam2@aol.com
Setting:Sonic Park, Colorado
Characters:Robin Brovlosky, Beast Boy Marsh, Eric "Cyborg" Cartman, Killer Moth McKormick, Jesus, Santa, Brian Boitano
Type of Story:Humor, Crossover
Rating:R
------------------------------------------------------------------------ -----------------------------------------------------
Well here's the second version of "The Spirit of Christmas". This was created when an executive producer at Fox Network asked Matt Stone, and Trey Parker to create a video Christmas card for his friends. This seemed more like the South Park we know and love more than the first "Spirit of Christmas" did. As Stan, Kyle, Cartman, and Kenny's designs look the way they look today. Cartman is called Cartman and Kenny is called Kenny in this, where they weren't in the first "Spirit of Christmas". Anyway enjoy "The Spirit of Christmas" (Jesus vs. Santa).
------------------------------------------------------------------------ -----------------------------------------------------
Kids:We wish you a merry Christmas, We wish you a merry Christmas, We wish you a merry Christmas...
Beast Boy: hey wait a minute.
Robin: What?
Beast Boy:Aren't you Jewish, Robin?
Robin:Yeah, I think so.
Beast Boy: Dude, Jewish people don't celebrate Christmas.
Robin:What?
Beast Boy:You're suppose to sing Hanukkah songs!
[pause]
Robin: Dreidel dreidel dreidel, I made you out of clay, dreidel dreidel dreidel...
Beast Boy:He he that's a stupid song.
Cyborg:Yeah, Hanukkah sucks.
Robin: Don't you oppress me, fat boy.
Cyborg: Don't call me fat, buttfucker.
Robin:Then don't belittle my people you fuckin' fatass!
Cyborg:Goddammit don't call me fat you buttfuckin' son-of-a-bitch!
[Jesus floats down from the sky.]
Robin:What the...
Killer Moth:ahhh...
[pulls his hood closed]
Jesus:Behold my glory.
Beast Boy:Holy shit, it's Jesus!
Cyborg:what are you doing in Titan Park, Jesus?
Jesus:I come seeking...retribution.
Beast Boy:[gasp] He's come to kill you cuz you're Jewish, Robin!
Robin:Oh, fuck! I'm sorry, Jesus. Don't kill me.
Jesus:Nay, fear not. I love All My Children.
Robin:[phew]
Jesus:Tomorrow is my birthday. Yet all is not right.
Beast Boy:Your birthday is on Christmas? That sucks, dude.
Jesus:I must find a place called "The Mall".
Robin:Well we can take you to the mall, Jesus.
Beast Boy:Yeah! It's over this way.
[Robin and Killer Moth exit]
Cyborg:Ugh... Goddammit, you stepped on my foot you pigfucker.
Beast Boy: Dude, don't say pig fucker in front of Jesus.
[Beast Boy exits]
Cyborg:Eh, fuck you.
[in front of Titan Park mall]
Beast Boy:Here we are Jesus, Titan Park Mall. Who are you looking for?
Jesus:Him!
[Jesus points to Santa who's sitting with children]
Santa:Ho ho ho. We meet again, Jesus.
Jesus:You have blemished the meaning of Christmas for the last time, Kringle.
Santa:I bring happiness and love to children all over the world.
Jesus:Christmas is for celebrating my birth.
Santa:Christmas is for giving.
Jesus:I'm here to put an end to your blasphemy.
Santa:This time we finish it. [stands] There can be only one.
Beast Boy: Dude, this is pretty fucked up right here.
[Jesus and Santa fight, Mortal Combat style]
[Santa spins Jesus and throws him]
Robin, Beast Boy:Go Santa!
[Jesus looks at them]
Robin, Beast Boy:Uh, go Jesus!
Jesus:[fake Japanese]
[Jesus tosses something at Santa]
[Santa dodges, and the energy hits the "Visit Santa" sign and knocks it down and kills three kids]
Santa:[fake Japanese]
[Santa tosses something and slices Shadows head off]
Killer Moth: Oh no! Ahhhhhhhhh
[Killer Moths head flys off and knocks over a statue and kills three kids]
Robin:Oh my god! They killed Killer Moth!
Santa:Hey you son-of-a-bitch come on.
Jesus:Boys, help me put an end to him once and for all.
Santa:No, boys, help me, so that I can put an end to him.
Jesus:God is watching you, boys. You know who to help.
Santa:Beast Boy, remember the choo-choo when you were three?
Jesus:I died for your sins, boys. Don't forget that.
Beast Boy:I don't know what to do, dude. Who should we help?
Cyborg:I say we help Santa Claus.
Robin:Eh, you're just saying that because he brings you candy.
Robin:Hey! I don't need to take that kinda shit from a jew.
Robin:You're such a fat fuck, Cyborg, that when you walk down the street people go god DAMMIT that kid's a BIG FAT FUCK.
Cyborg:Oh yeah? Well listen up...
Robin:SHUT UP!!
[Jesus, Santa, Robinc, Beast Boy, and Cyborg argue and shout at eachother]
Beast Boy:Wait, wait, just a second. Now we've got to think here. Now let's see. What would Brian Boitano do?
Cyborg:Yeah. What would Brian Boitano do?
[Brian Boitano appears.]
Brian: Did someone say my name?
Cyborg:Brian Boitano!
Robin:What incredible irony!
Cyborg:Yeah, it's Brian Boitano!
Brian:What's going on, kids?
Beast Boy:Okay, Brian? Who would you help in a fight, Jesus or Santa Claus?
Brian:Kids...you shouldn't think of things like that. This is the one time of year when we all try to get along, no matter what we believe in. This is the season just to be good to each other. Bi-eee!
[Brian skates away.]
Jesus:You fuckin' pussy!
Santa:C'mere! Come on!
Beast Boy:Hey, Jesus! You have to understand that Santa is keeping the spirit of your birthday alive by bringing happiness and joy.
Robin:Yeah. And Santa, you need to remember that if it weren't for Jesus, this day wouldn't even exist!
Santa:You're right kids. I'm sorry Jesus.
Jesus:No, no. It's me who should be sorry. I've been a right bastard. I'm sorry Kringle.
Santa:Thank you boys.
Jesus:Yeah, thank you boys. Come on, Kringle, I'll buy you an Orange Smoothie.
Santa: oooo!
[they walk off]
Beast Boy:[phew] That sucked.
Robin:Yeah, but just think. Today we actually met no we actually spoke to the Brian Boitano.
Beast Boy:Yeah. And you know? I think I learned something today, it doesn't matter if you're Christian or Jewish or Atheist or Hindu. Christmas still is about one very important thing:
Cyborg:Yeah, ham.
Beast Boy:No not ham, you fat fuck!
Cyborg:Fuck you!
Beast Boy:Christmas is about something much more important.
Robin:What?
Beast Boy:Presents.
Robin:Ah.
Beast Boy: Don't you see, Robin? Presents.
Robin:Hey man, if you're Jewish you get presents for eight days.
Beast Boy:Wow, really?! Count me in.
Cyborg:Yeah, I'll be a Jew too.
boys:[leaving] [singing]Dreidel dreidel dreidel I made you out of clay dreidel dreidel dreidel with dreidel I will play!
[rats come and carry off Killer Moth's body]
[The End]
------------------------------------------------------------------------ -----------------------------------------------------
Well how did you like the original episode of Sonic Park. Check back soon because I will be getting the first episode of the series up soon. Send all comments, flames, and reviews to HyperSonicAdam2@aol.com