Final Fantasy - All Series Fan Fiction ❯ Forever Walking Alone ❯ Forever Walking Alone ( Chapter 2 )

Once, he had been called a failure. Once, he had been called a hero. Now, he was just being called a forgotten hero. The one that nobody remembered, the one nobody loved. The one that even time forgot. It was a painful truth, but one he could handle. He didn't want to be treated in any special way. He was a murderer, killing his own lover to save himself. He didn't deserve to be called a hero. And the worst part, he could still feel him in his blood, feel him on his skin.

He could feel the long fingers as they danced over his naked skin, the warm tongue as it kissed his sensitive spots, caressing all the right places. Sighing heavily, he lifted his head to watch the stars dancing above him. An eternal dance he had helped to preserve for the millions of people inhabiting the world.

His long blond hair was spiked, impossibly standing up. He didn't do anything to it; it just rose of its own free will. He didn't want to do anything to it, but sometimes, just on the occasion he remembered his lover's preference, he would slide gel through his hair and slick it down, letting it hang well below his shoulder blades. When he had been alive, he had loved to run his hands through the hair when he had it smoothed back. He was a lover once upon a time. Once, long ago.

He sighed as his head fell back. He couldn't stop thinking of him. He couldn't stop thinking of the beautiful silver hair that would fall around his shoulders, tickling his bare skin. He couldn't stop thinking about the catlike green eyes that would pierce his soul, that could look into him and know the truth.

He had to fight against Jenova's demonic offspring once more. He didn't want to. He was one himself. The blood that flowed through their veins was the same blood in his own veins. He was a child of the damned alien and he couldn't do anything to stop the pain in his body. She was relentless, ruthless bitch and she wouldn't leave him alone.

Once, he'd been a green recruit walking into the training camp, alone and afraid. He'd been terrified until a beautiful stranger had strolled across his path and spoken to him. His name was Sephiroth. He was the hottest thing this side of the sun. He had beautiful silver hair that flowed like silk and danced in luminescent strands behind his back. He had emerald green cat eyes that seemed to peer into the very soul of the person he was looking at. His thin body was covered in muscles that danced in an orchestral ballet throughout the body, urging any to touch what they could not have.

Sephiroth had whispered: “Don't be afraid. You've got to be strong to be a SOLDIER and that means you can't be afraid.”

Cloud had wanted him.

Cloud had gotten him.

A few days later, he'd been beaten within inches of his life. The general had seen him, had taken pity on him. He had been cared for by the beautiful Sephiroth and while he lay in his hospital bed recovering from the pain of his injuries, he'd gotten to know Sephiroth a little bit better. The quiet leader had leaned against the bed, playing with the blond spikes that decorated his head. He knew he was in pain, he knew he should be working on focusing his mind on recovering, but he couldn't think of anything other then that beautiful man and his wonderfully long hand playing in his hair.

“I like your hair Cloud. I've never felt another man's hair before that was so soft,” he murmured once.

When he was able to leave, cleared by the nursing staff that had kept him locked within the nursing building, Sephiroth had been waiting for him, standing across the street with his friend, Zack. Cloud couldn't stop the smile that danced across his face, the beautiful Sephiroth waiting for him, little Cloud. He walked humbly over to the pair and smiled, a blush painting his cheeks.

“Better now?” Zack asked, his voice deep and rich.

When he had first met the impulsive Zack, he had no idea how important the spiky, blue-haired man would become to him. He'd had no idea he'd owe his very life, his existence to the man.

“Much, thanks. You are?” Cloud had responded, none too nicely.

“I'm Zack. This is my friend Sephiroth. He's the perfect companion. He's quiet, cleans up after himself and is paper-trained!” Zack laughed, throwing his arm companionably around Sephiroth's shoulders.

“Zack!” Sephiroth chastised, pushing the blue-haired man away as he rolled his perfect emerald eyes. “Shut up. Come on Cloud. Let's get you home, okay?”

The beautiful Sephiroth had taken him under his wing. He'd helped him when he'd needed the most help. And when Sephiroth had needed help, when he was bent and determined to destroy the earth, when he should have had somebody, he'd had nobody. The ones who should have been there for him had abandoned him. Had allowed him to fall into insanity and destroy himself. Cloud had taken the opportunity to destroy the man and had gone through with it. He was a murderer.

He'd killed all that he'd ever loved.

The first time he'd been with Sephiroth, he would always remember. It hadn't been the romantic, fantastic thing that people would always say it was. There was pain, lots of pain. But there was pleasure. There was so much pleasure that he would come back for more, over and over. The first time he'd been with Sephiroth, he'd been so afraid. He'd hardly moved, hardly done anything other then feel.

The large hands had roamed over his body, dancing over the naked skin. He'd moaned, breathing quickly, his breath lost in the room as Sephiroth's hands brought him into a corner he'd never been in before: desire. And when those perfect, soft lips had encompassed him, caressed him and brought him to the precipice of pleasure.

Cloud's head fell back against the wall he had been pressed into. Sephiroth's tongue was dancing over skin never before exposed to other's contact. And the effect was incredible. The larger man loomed over the blond, his naked skin rubbing along the soft skin of the other. His long silver hair fell over the smaller man's body, coating him in a radiant cover of silk strands. Smirking the older man pressed his soft lips against Cloud's, moving them in a seductive dance.

“This is going to hurt a little Cloud, but don't fight it,” Sephiroth whispered, his mouth inches from Cloud's ears.

The blond shivered in pleasure before nodding. Placing a chaste kiss on the blond man's lips, he smiled before sucking his index finger into his mouth. Once sufficiently covered in saliva, he used his other hand to spread the pale cheeks. Kissing Cloud, Sephiroth slid his finger into the tight ring of muscles, sliding slowly back and forth, and breaking into the virginal canal. Cloud whimpered as he arched his back, trying to enjoy what was happening. Behind the pain, he was enjoying it. He just had to get used to it.

Just as he was comfortable, Sephiroth did something he couldn't believe, he slid a second finger in. He nibbled at Cloud's bottom lip, massaging with his tongue. Cloud's arms wrapped around Sephiroth's neck, holding tight as he moved against Sephiroth's probing fingers. He didn't know what he wanted to do, torn between crying through his clenched eyes and moaning in pleasure. He opted to do both, crying as he moaned, letting Sephiroth's fingers guide him.

The older man groaned as he pumped his fingers in Cloud's tight opening. The blond moved fluidly, his body following Sephiroth's urgings as he pushed the boy closer to accepting his gift. Pulling his finger free, he smiled at the blond before he pressed his younger lover against the wall. “I want you Cloud,” he murmured, licking at the bottom of the ear. “I want you more then you know.”

The blond shivered, gripping Sephiroth's strong shoulders tightly. There were tears dancing in the corners of his eyes and his cheeks were colored with the faint pink of blushing. “I'm yours,” he murmured.

Pressing his lips against the blonde's, Sephiroth lifted the smaller man before plunging into the tight opening, pressing slowly as he worked his way deeper. The tight ring of muscles caressed him with each pump and he nearly lost it before he could even be sheathed completely. Cloud's nails dug into his back and his head was thrown back, opened in a soundless scream. Trying to get to the best part, Sephiroth moved within the smaller man, pushing for the pleasure that came after the pain.

He knew he struck gold when Cloud whimpered and bucked forward, nearly throwing him off balance. Bracing against the wall, Sephiroth pumped his hips forward again, filling the smaller boy. Cloud could do nothing but enjoy the pleasure that Sephiroth gave him. His body moved with the fluidity of a feline and he seemed to hit all the right spots. He was perfect in his actions. And when he thrust forward, he seemed to have found some pleasure center that drove him insane.

“Cloud,” the beautiful man whispered, shuddering as he exploded in the tight canal. “Oh, Cloud,” he whimpered, shivering and falling against the wall. Cloud trembled as he held onto the taller man, waiting for what ever would come next. He was still so close, so close he could feel it urging him to act.

The taller man understood and took the erect length in his large hand, sliding it along the moist length. Cloud arched into his touch, moaning as he finished what he'd started.

“Stop reminding me of him!” Cloud yelled angrily into the quiet of the night. He closed his blue-green eyes and grabbed fistfuls of his hair.

He was tired. Just exhausted and worn out. He couldn't stop thinking of the beautiful man he'd once called 'lover.' He'd killed him. Once he'd loved him and then he'd killed him. He'd promised never to hurt his beautiful lover but he'd done the worst thing possible, he'd killed him!

Tears filled his eyes and he laid his head on his knees. He wanted to be touched like Sephiroth had touched him. He longed for the way Sephiroth had filled him. He missed the powerful man's oh-so gentle touches. The beautiful, penetrating green eyes that saw to his soul. And the whispering words that proved he was loved.

Weak though he was, he was loved.

That bitch had called out to the three brothers. Boys so similar to Sephiroth, it was hard to keep him out of his thoughts. The leader, the outspoken one was similar in madness to Sephiroth. The words he spoke made little sense, but in his own mind, he was brilliantly leading the three beautiful brothers. The quiet one with the gunblade was so alike in appearance that Cloud just wanted to push him against the wall and have his way with him. His years of lack of contact with his lover were driving him insane. And the other one, the big one who cried. He was nearly identical to Sephiroth when he was alone with Cloud. The only time he had ever shown real emotion was when he was alone in bed with Cloud.

Hugging his powerful arms around himself, Cloud closed his eyes and let his mind drift back to the happier days. Zack had always teased. Cloud had often failed. But Sephiroth had always soothed. The silver-haired man had always been able to take the pain away and lessen it. He'd always been able to make him feel better.

“Sephiroth,” he murmured softly.

He had to fight these clones off. He didn't want to. He was a delivery man. He didn't want to fight against his lover's reincarnation. He wanted to deliver his packages and stay in his home, doomed to die the painful death gifted him by the geostigma. He would have wallowed in depression until he got the courage to die by his own sword. He would die like his lover had. He would fall into eternal sleep, join his lover and rest in peace. But they were threatening everything he'd fought so hard to save. They were threatening everything he'd given to preserve their peace.

Pain filled his body. His broken heart still beat in his chest. He was still an accomplished swordsman and yet, he was hesitant. He was a warrior. A powerful warrior and he was so afraid to go into battle again. A warrior afraid to fight. He hadn't been a peaceful person, far from it but he'd been able to limit to hand to hand combat.

When Sephiroth's double shot his glasses, he couldn't believe how similar to him he was. He'd been named Yazoo. The one named Kadaj had been the ranting one. And Loz the emotional one. Yazoo was so similar to Sephiroth. If he could combine the three, he could recreate his beautiful lover. But that ruthless bitch was speaking once more in his mind. She wouldn't stop talking to him. And he knew how he could get her to stop. Destroying the beautiful boys would silence the bitch in his head.

He wanted to destroy them, wanted to save the precarious peace he'd helped bring about. But doing so would be like going against Sephiroth once more.

Closing his eyes, he drifted back in time to happier days. The days of his lover's arms, his lover's kisses his lover's body. When he would keep him in his bed and hold him tightly.

“Hey Cloud!” Sephiroth's voice called to wake him.

“What?”

“Come on. Time to wake up and do your morning exercises.”

Rolling his blue-green eyes, Cloud rolled over and ran into the hard body of his lover and superior officer. “Why do I have to get up if you're not?” he grumbled.

“Because I do them faster then you. Besides, I wanna watch you work out here,” Sephiroth smiled, quirking a perfect eyebrow mischievously.

“That's still not fair!” Cloud grumbled.

“Get to it, that's an order, soldier,” Sephiroth smiled, pushing the smaller man out of the bed.

“You're a cheater.”

“I'm not a cheater! I'm just pushing you to be better, that's all,” Sephiroth smiled.

“You're still a dirty cheater,” Cloud grumbled. He stood up and stretched softly. He popped all the muscles in his back before kneeling on the floor. “You want to come down here and count?”

“Is that an invite?”

“What do you think?” Cloud smiled, licking his lips.

“This is why I enjoy exercise in the mornings,” Sephiroth smiled, sliding out of the bed he shared with the blond. Smirking, he placed his hands behind his head and waited for the push-ups to begin. Cloud braced himself, a parallel to the ground and lowered his body, pressing a kiss to the silver-haired man's lips. Rolling his body as he pushed against the floor he smirked at the look of pleasure that flooded the taller man's face.

“Cloud,” Sephiroth murmured softly, his voice growling as he raised a hand to the bare chest above him.

“What's the matter?” Cloud asked, his voice straining as he lowered himself once more, pressing into a kiss.

“You're teasing. You're not being fair to me,” he pouted, sticking out his lower lip.

“Oh? I'm cheating?” Cloud asked softly.

“You're a cheater,” Sephiroth growled, pulling on Cloud's hips as he rolled his body up, raising himself above the older man.

“You like it though, don't you,” Cloud gasped as he lowered himself, pressing against Sephiroth's obvious reaction.

“Keep it up soldier and I'll have to discipline you,” Sephiroth growled again.

Cloud smirked as he rolled his body, raising himself above the beautiful man below him. Licking his lips, he lowered himself and pressed against the man. “Is that a promise or a threat, sir?”

“You are going to get it right now,” Sephiroth murmured, reversing their positions. He straddled the blond, his hands roaming the thin body almost frantically.

“That's why I don't do push-ups anymore,” Cloud murmured softly looking away from the trees around him. “That's why I don't do it anymore. I can't do it without crying,” he whispered into the cloth of his shoulders.

Tears threatened to fall down his face, but he couldn't, he wouldn't stop them. He enjoyed the tears, letting them fall as they should, tracing a heated path down his face. He was a lover without his lover, a man without his heart. He had every right to cry. He didn't want to fight. He didn't want to, but he knew it was impossible to avoid.

In the silence of his mental wallowing, he jumped as the shrill ringing of his phone disturbed him. He looked sadly at it before lifting the small piece of technology in his hand and letting the voice of his childhood friend roll over his ear.

“Cloud, you have to come back home. There's something wrong with the kids. Come home Cloud. We need you,” Tifa cried into her end of the phone.

Sighing, Cloud hung up. Wiping the tears from his face, he stood and mounted his bike. The warrior had to fight. Alone. He would always be alone; it was something he was used to now, little though he liked it.

He would always walk alone.