Final Fantasy - All Series Fan Fiction ❯ My Happy Ending ❯ Forgiveness ( Chapter 25 )

Chapter 25: Forgiveness

“I hope you find

Whatever it is you're looking for.

The hardest words

I've never said before.”

-All That's Left “Never Said”

The following morning, Cid was folding his clothes and packing them away in his duffel bag down in the basement when he heard a faint creaking behind him. He glanced over his shoulder to find Shera standing at the base of the steps looking at him in her usual quiet manner.

“Can I help you?” Cid asked turning back to his packing.

Shera ventured a few steps toward him. “I'm leaving out in a little while.”

“Going home?”

“Yes.”

“So I hear you're in Costa del Sol.”

Shera nodded as Cid finished packing the last of his things.

“And you opened some kind of shop?”

“A clothing and tailoring business.”

Cid nodded. “How's that workin' out fer ya?”

“Actually, much better than I anticipated.”

“That's good. Glad to see you found a use for that hobby of yours…” There was a long, awkward pause. “Um, was there something else?” he finally asked dumbly.

“Y-yes, actually…” Shera told him, hesitating. “Um, can we sit down?”

“Sure.”

Cid and Shera sat down on the couch, and the woman fiddled her hands in her dress.

“I don't know where to begin…” she hesitated.

“Then let me start,” Cid told her. “Look, I dun expect you to forgive me because God knows I don't fucking deserve it, but there are a few things I'd like to get off my chest.” He paused, taking in a deep, shaky breath. “I guess the first thing I ought to say is that I never realized how much of a fucking prick I am. Raye and I…well, we had a little talk last night, and she told me something real personal about herself that really opened my eyes. I guess that brings me to one of the other things I wanted to say…I really cared about you Shera. Hell, I guess I could even say I loved you, but dammit, I never meant to hurt you. I never meant for things to get so far out of hand. When I came back home, I thought…I thought we'd make somethin' of…well…us. But I had to go off and fuck it up like I always do, and that last time…well I guess I just finally pushed you so far away you couldn't handle it anymore.”

He lowered his head dejectedly. “You were one of the few good things in my life I've ever had, but I kicked you in the ass over and over again, and now I'm kickin' my own self in the ass.” He sighed. “I think the reason why I was such a jerk after they canned the space program was because I was angry, not really at you, but just in general. I mean, neither of us knew those asstards at ShinRa were going to close it down, but I guess it was just easier to blame it all on you because that was unknowingly the last chance for me to go to space, and when I saved you, it felt like it got me nothing.” He looked up at her in earnest. “But after I did go to space and after I came home from savin' the planet, there was just no excuse.”

Shera peered at him in complete surprise. He'd thrown her for a loop, and she wasn't sure how to react. Still, she came down here for a reason.

She cleared her throat. “Wow…I did not see that coming, Captain.”

“Cid,” the pilot corrected. “I always wanted you to call me Cid.”

“Um, well….Cid…” The named rolled off her tongue like some foreign word. To Shera, calling him by his first name was foreign. “I don't really have as much to say because I said what was on my mind last night.” She paused, looking down at her lap. “I know you were probably hoping I would come back to Rocket Town, but the truth is that I really am very content where I am now. Captain, er, Cid, there's just far too much between us for me to ever come back, and besides, I'm with Brad now, and I…well…I really love him.”

She finally looked up at him, and she could tell just from looking into those blue eyes she'd always adored that he was broken.

Cid swallowed hard. He felt as though his throat was about to clamp shut. He should have figured there was no hope of her ever coming back, but he'd held onto the glimmer of hope for so long. Even when Raye had stayed with him, Shera was the first person he'd thought of, though Raye was what kept him going. At least he knew how things would be.

“Well, you deserve it, Sher. After everything I put you through, you deserve it, and just from the way he talks about you, I know he kin love you better than I ever could.”

“I'm sorry if all of this is hurtful. I…I don't want it to be, but please, at least know that I forgive you for everything. And you shouldn't be the only one apologizing…I left you without a word. I shouldn't have handled it that way, but…”

“Don't worry about it,” Cid told her sadly. “I fucking deserved it.”

“I don't want bad blood between us anymore, Cid.”

“Neither do I, Shera, but…I…I'm glad you forgive me…even though I don't deserve it.”

“Well, Brad told me that we need to `be here now'.”

Cid chuckled a little. “You know I got that same conversation last night with him?”

For once, Shera ventured to giggle in front of him. “Really?”

“Yeah, and ya know what? It really makes sense.” He looked at her hopefully. “Hey, Sher?”

“Yes?”

“I know this is kinda a shot in the dark, but…you think we have a chance at bein' friends, still?”

Shera stood up. “Things won't happen overnight, but, yes, I think there's still a slight chance…”

“Brad won't mind?”

Shera smiled. “I don't think so.”

Cid stood up and looked down at Shera. “There's gonna be some big changes, Shera. I don't know if I'll ever be as happy as you, but…I have to take care not to be a big fuck up again.”

Shera rose to her feet and faced Cid. “There's a happy ending for you, too, Capt - er - Cid; you have yet to find yours.”