Final Fantasy - All Series Fan Fiction ❯ Shattered Ice ❯ Not A Perfect Person ( Chapter 30 )

Inspired by Hoobastank's The Reason.

 

Chapter 30: Not a Perfect Person

 

Nanaki inhaled sharply as the airship gave just the slightest hitch. The pilot seemed to still be having trouble with his landing. The demi-human easily regained his balance, rocking with the movement as he stood waiting patiently in the cargo bay. It was time for him to go home, if only for a short while anyways and find this “reason”.

 

This was fine with him as he got to see his Grandfather again, but he couldn't help the tiny pangs in his heart at the fact that he wouldn't get to be with Yuffie for a few days. There was something about being with the young ninja girl that made him feel… alive and completely human, no matter what form his body took. She had an unfailingly exuberant exterior and a contemplative calm interior that she rarely showed the others. It made him feel special that he was one of the rare few that saw that side of her. Reeve had as well, but he gave her a type of fatherly affections it seemed she couldn't get from her own.

 

Another rough gust of wind battered at the descending airship and it swayed just a bit more. Nanaki cursed under his breath and grabbed a handhold to wait it out.

 

After Cloud had ordered them all to just go, a few had stood around confused, trying to figure out exactly where “go” meant. Nanaki knew instantly that he wanted to go home, and made sure to tell the pilot first. However, something told him that his reasons were not just for Cosmo Canyon… that was a feeling he did not understand just yet. Perhaps he would go to his father's grave again. None of the monsters in the Gi Nattak cave could bother him as strong as he was now. Yes, that was what he would do.

 

“Nanaki, you would leave without saying goodbye?” came the very recognizable voice of one Yuffie Kisaragi.

 

The demi-human turned from his contemplative musings at the bay door and greeted his young friend. Well… considering the form he was in… they were around the same age now.

 

“Sorry, Yuff, but we were already close to the canyon when I told the pilot to drop me off. I hardly had time to grab a few things.”

 

She had a pouting look on her face as she crossed her arms and huffed. “Yeah right, you know you just would miss me too much.”

 

He smiled at her. Perhaps there was truth to the matter. “Are you going home?”

 

She nodded and moved to stand beside him, staring out the small window in the Bay door. “Gotta see the old man before the world ends; let him know I'm not about to give up yet!!” She grinned then, flashing one of her devious looks. “I'm still running a bit low on materia…”

 

“Oh?” Nanaki teased holding up a small green ball. “Like the one you just swiped from me?”

 

Her mouth dropped as her hand dug into the pocket where she had stuffed the earlier pilfered materia. “Nanaki, you've gotten sneaky.”

 

“Have to keep up with you somehow, ne?” he asked with a raised eyebrow, putting the materia back into its proper slot on his armlet.

 

She grinned broadly at him until she felt the airship give a slight bump, indicating that it had successfully completed its landing. A solemn look came over her face as the ramp began to descend and the Bay doors opened. “You're coming back, right?”

 

He reached out and pulled her into a hug which she returned with equal vigor. “If I didn't, Cloud and the others would be fighting materia-less, ne?”

 

She laughed slightly at that, pulling away from the hug while the doors finished their opening procedures. “Hey, I'm not that bad!” she protested.

 

He looked down at her smiling face and felt his heart nearly begin to race. She was a beautiful girl; there was no doubt about that. “No, you're not. You had better be coming back as well!!”

 

The little ninja stuck out a hand as if to shake. “It's a promise.”

 

Nanaki reached out with his and grasped hers warmly. “A promise.” And then… he didn't understand why he did it or what compelled him… but something about the moment felt right, like he couldn't leave without saying a proper goodbye.

 

With the sun casting sunset glows over them from the open cargo bay door and knowing it was time for him to go, instead of releasing her hand, Nanaki gave a small pull. Yuffie gasped and stumbled forwards into his waiting arms. She looked up at him with confusion, but he silenced her questions when he leaned down slightly and claimed her lips as his own.

 

The ninja felt soft to him, unbelievably soft, and her lips parted willingly on a breathy sigh. He gave her a tentative swipe with his tongue, just getting a taste of the exotic and sweet flavor before pulling back suddenly, as if surprised by what he had done.

 

Instantly he felt embarrassment wash over his features and his cheeks reddened. “Um… g… goodbye Miss Kisaragi…” he stuttered before taking off down the ramp and into the Cosmo Canyon area. He felt a fool. What if he had just damaged their relationship permanently? Mentally, the demi-human cursed himself as he ran towards his home.

 

Yuffie stared after him, a dreamy expression on her face as a hand unconsciously went to her lips, touching the lingering sensation of his lips on hers. The ninja instantly blushed at the thought. Mechanically, she reached forward and pressed the button that would close the Cargo Bay doors. It was time for her to go home as well; she had much to think about.

 

* * *

 

Vincent pressed his lover up against the door, swallowing the blond's lips in a fervent kiss as he pushed a knee between the other man's legs hungrily. Slowly he ground his hips into the pilot's, eliciting a breathy moan from said pilot that only made the ex-Turk want to ravish him more. He hurriedly unbuckled the scarlet cloak and flung it across the floor, also removing the headband that restrained his hair. They were just scraps of clothing that were unnecessary for the moment, at least to the gunman's aroused mind.

 

Cid had no complaints as he was pushed forcefully up against the door. Indeed, his libido would have smacked him silly if he even thought to protest. It came as no surprise to the pilot that after Cloud had made his proclamation, Vincent had practically dragged him to his room. It wasn't unusual for the gunman to want sex after having to turn into one of the demons. The physical pleasure and intimacy was what the ex-Turk craved, trying to convince himself he was still human under all the experiments and torture. And said blond pilot was more than happy to comply.

 

He reached around the gunman and pulled Vincent closer to him, putting their bodies as close to each other as he deemed possible and deepening the kiss.

 

Except this time was different… while Vincent was being a bit more forceful than usual, he was also taking his time, slowly exploring the pilot's body and lingering in kisses. Cid knew that it wasn't just about the fight with Hojo that had made his gunman act in such a way. And he also knew, that he wasn't about to let Vincent have all the control this time. No… this time he was going to make love to his gunman and show the ex-Turk that he truly cared.

 

Breaking off the kiss, albeit reluctantly, Cid ran a hand through Vincent's raven tresses and looked into his crimson eyes. There was lust there and a fiery need, but also the hint of something more. And it was that hint that drove Cid to say what he wanted to say.

 

“Let me… show you what it is to be human,” the Captain said softly, rubbing a calloused thumb over the gunman's soft cheek.

 

Vincent's eyes narrowed for a moment. “I already told you-“

 

Cid shook his head, interrupting whatever reason he knew was going to come out of Vincent's mouth. “You're the same size as me Vince, I don't want to hear that bullshit excuse anymore. I understand now… even if you didn't… and all I ask is that you trust me to make you feel good. You once came to me with the same offer to make the pain go away… why can't I do the same?”

 

The gunman frowned and made as if to pull away, but Cid's arms were locked tight around him. The pilot wasn't going to let go until he got an answer.

 

“Trust… I trust you, Cid, perhaps more than is safe for me… but” He paused for a moment. “You ask for too much,” he murmured softly, looking away since he couldn't get away.

 

The pilot gently grasped the gunman's head and turned Vincent to face him once more. He claimed the ex-Turk's lips in a passionate kiss, trying to input all his desire and feelings into that one sensual kiss.

 

“Let me show you how it's supposed to be,” Cid whispered softly, trapping a crimson-eyed gaze with his own. “Before that chance is forever taken away.” The unspoken words hung heavy on the air… the truth that in six days… there might not be a future.

 

Vincent sighed and closed his eyes, trying to fight down the apprehension that was building up within him. He leaned his head forward and buried his face in the pilot's neck, breathing in the smoky scent that he had come to recognize as belonging exclusively to the blond.

 

“… I will trust you,” the gunman conceded. He felt rather than saw the grin that spread across Cid's face.

 

“I promise… I will be gentle,” the Captain soothed in a low sensual voice.

 

Vincent looked up and their eyes met. It was only inevitable that their lips found each other but it was slow and exploratory as if recognizing the taste of each other for the first time.

 

Cid slowly began to remove his goggles and kicked off his shoes as he carefully pushed the ex-Turk back towards the bed. In turn, Vincent kicked off his boots and removed his black glove and gun holster. All of these items fell to the floor in a haphazard pile, forgotten. A blue jean jacket soon joined them.

 

The ex-Turk felt the back of his knees hit the bed and he collapsed upon it gratefully, Cid knelt between his legs and bent over to kiss the gunman. He could tell that the gunman was tense beneath him, as if anticipating what was to come with mixed feelings.

 

“You gotta relax, baby,” the pilot soothed. “I won't hurt you.” He reached out and deftly unbuttoned the Turk's shirt, slipping a hand inside to graze over a pale chest. He traced small designs over the scarred yet soft skin before settling over one dusky nipple. Vincent arched up beneath him at the touch, moaning softly.

 

The gunman reached up with one golden claw and used a sharp forefinger to cut through the soft cotton of Cid's undershirt. It parted easily beneath his careful touch and Vincent took the opportunity to push it off the blond, who helped for just a moment before returning to the task of pale skin before him.

 

He latched onto a nipple delighting in the breathy moan that escaped from Vincent's throat, sounding almost like a purr. The gunman bucked up with his hips, grinding himself into Cid's erection even as he reached down to unbuckle the pilot's jeans and push them off the blond's hips.

 

Cid backed off the bed so that he could remove his pants more easily, smirking down at the gunman. “In a hurry, are we?”

 

Vincent growled. “Just take those clothes off!”

 

The pilot smirked and hurriedly took off his pants, shoving his boxers down as well. Then he leaned over the bed and tackled Vincent's as well, a devilish smile covering his face when he realized that the ex-Turk wore no underwear.

 

“Commando?” questioned Cid, raising an eyebrow in question.

The ex-Turk waved him off. “You tore my last pair, and I hadn't had time to buy more.”

 

The Captain didn't respond. Instead he moved over to the bedside table and started digging around in the clutter. Vincent leaned up on an elbow as he frowned, trying to figure out what the pilot was doing. They didn't normally keep the lube in that drawer…

 

“Ah, ha!!” exclaimed Cid, seemingly very proud of himself. He held up a small bottle for the gunman to see and grinned from ear to ear.

 

He moved back towards the bed and crawled between Vincent's legs, bending down to kiss the gunman on the lips before pressing the bottle into the dark-haired man's hand.

 

“How did you…?” questioned Vincent when he looked at the bottle. It was his favorite scent, Pina Colada.

 

“Don't you remember? You told me once that you loved tropical scents most because they made you think of places you would never be able to go. Besides the vanilla disappeared somehow, I haven't been able to find it…” He leaned down and kissed the gunman once more, taking the opportunity to run a hand down Vincent's body and caressing the soft skin.

 

The ex-Turk nearly forgot what he was supposed to be thinking as he pressed the oil back into Cid's hands and wrapped his own arms around the pilot's neck, pulling him closer against his body. He slipped his tongue inside the blond's mouth and absorbed the flavor that he found there. The other man was more than happy to reciprocate the favor.

 

Cid roamed an empty hand down over the planes of Vincent's body, caressing each of his sensitive spots and enjoying the sounds that the gunman was making. He didn't even need the ex-Turk to touch him to get aroused. The sounds were quite enough.

 

Ignoring the gunman's protests, Cid broke away from the kiss and began to nip his way down the dark-haired man's body until he found himself where he wanted to be, kneeling between the gunman's legs with his straining erection within sight. He eyed Vincent hungrily before leaning down and giving him an experimental lick.

 

The dark-haired man released a breathy sigh and buried his hands in the pilot's hair, urging him to continue on. The initial nervousness seemed to fade as he found himself drowning in the pleasure that Cid was giving him.

 

The pilot drew the gunman into his mouth completely, taking in as much of the length as he was able. He swirled his tongue around Vincent's erection and sucked alternatively. The dark-haired man was writhing beneath him, awash in the sensation and finally relaxing.

 

Cid took that opportunity to uncap the oil and begin to coat his fingers with it, though never ceasing in his mouth torture. The room filled with the tropical scents of pineapple and coconut. He wanted Vincent to know only pleasure and was trying to distract him from the inevitable first pain. After all, it had been close to thirty years for the man.

 

He slipped his oil slicked hand down between the gunman's legs and searched for the tiny puckered entrance. When he found it he traced tiny circles around the entrance, oiling up the outside and teasing the gunman before he began to press in one finger very slowly and very gently. Almost immediately, Vincent tensed up as he felt the invading digit.

 

Cid released the gunman's erection from his mouth and crawled up Vincent's body, capturing his lips. “Relax, baby, or it's going to hurt no matter what I do.”

 

“I am relaxed,” the ex-Turk responded.

 

Cid couldn't help the chuckle that broke out over his face. He tried to soothe the gunman's fears by moving down and nibbling on Vincent's neck, especially around the dark-haired man's ears, a particularly sensitive spot for the ex-Turk.

 

Vincent moaned and clutched at Cid's body, barely able to think beyond the pleasure that the pilot was giving him. He slowly relaxed his body, lost to the sensations of the blond's lips on his neck.

 

The Captain took that opportunity to press the oil-slicked finger completely inside his apprehensive lover and begin to stretch him. When Vincent didn't protest or tense up further, Cid added another finger, using a scissoring motion to stretch him. By gods, the pilot was going to everything he was able to make sure that he didn't hurt his lover.

 

Vincent's right hand trailed down the blond's back, heading dangerously south to slip between the pilot's two cheeks and running a finger around the blond's tight ring. Cid couldn't help but moan at the feeling, wanting to buck backwards at the teasing digit. Yet, he restrained himself, instead adding in a third finger, since Vincent was so inclined to start teasing the pilot in his own way.

 

He felt deep inside the gunman's body, searching for the one spot that would make Vincent melt in his arms and convince the dark-haired man to no longer be afraid. He knew he had found it when the ex-Turk suddenly gripped the blond's ass and purred deep inside his throat.

 

Cid stopped sucking on his lover's neck, noting with satisfaction that he left a dark purplish-red mark in his wake, and pulled back just enough to look at his gunman. He continued to pump the ex-Turk with his fingers, making sure to hit his prostate each time.

 

The gunman was truly a beautiful sight. Eyes closed in passion, mouth parted slightly emitting small moans of pleasure, forehead just beginning to sweat, Cid found he would have been able to stare all night if he was so inclined. However, there was more that he had in store for the ex-Turk and so he pulled away reluctantly.

 

Sitting back on his lower legs and removing his fingers, Cid dug around in the covers until he found the earlier discarded bottle of oil and poured a liberal amount on his fingers. He coated his straining erection with the sweet smelling lubricant before capping the bottle and tossing it away.

 

He leaned forward and balanced his weight on his left arm as it settled heavily into the bed next to the gunman's head. He used his right to guide himself slowly to Vincent's entrance.

 

When the gunman first felt the blunt head of Cid's arousal probing gently at his entrance his first thought was to tense up, expecting it to be extremely painful. Only with great mind control did he manage to calm himself and concentrate on the good sensations that the pilot was providing.

 

Slowly, gently, Cid pressed into him, inch by agonizing inch. It took nearly all the pilot's willpower not to just pound into the ex-Turk, he was so damn tight.

 

However, things weren't going as well as the blond had hoped. That first penetration and it seemed Vincent was immediately thrown into his memories, reliving the time that Hojo had so brutally taken him. All he could recall was the pain and feeling of helpless, the sensation of being ripped in two and blood coursing down his thighs from being torn on the inside.

 

Instantly, the gunman seized up, clutching at Cid's arms tightly, cutting into one with his claw. He scrunched his eyes up tight and moaned but not with passion. The Captain immediately caught on and knew what the problem was. In fact, he had anticipated it.

 

Without withdrawing, he took his right hand and gently cupped the ex-Turk's face, wiping away an errant tear that had already broken free.

 

“Vince,” he said softly, trying to gain the gunman's attention. “Open your eyes, Vincent.”

 

Slowly, almost painfully, the gunman opened his eyes, teary crimson meeting concerned blue.

 

“Look at me. Look in my eyes, know who I am,” intoned the pilot, eyes never leaving the pale face of his lover.

 

Another lone tear slipped from the ex-Turk's eye. “Kiss me…” he whispered softly, voice sounding strangely broken to the pilot.

 

“I would never hurt you,” the blond whispered in return as he leaned down and claimed Vincent's lips in a gentle kiss. Slowly, he began to thrust further into the gunman while the dark-haired man clung to him like a lifeline.

 

Visions of Hojo began to fade, replaced by caring sky blue eyes and a scruffy chin. Cid moaned deeply as he felt himself buried completely inside the ex-Turk and ensheathed within the warm, wet heat. He stilled for a moment, allowing the gunman to get used to the feeling.

 

Unconsciously, Vincent wrapped his legs around Cid's waist and ground himself down on the pilot's hardness. There was something satisfying in feeling filled in such a way that made the gunman forget everything sick and twisted that had ever happened to him. All that mattered was this feeling.

 

The scent of arousal hanging heavy in the air, the music of breathy moans and sweat slicked skin rubbing together, the taste of smoke and spice in the gunman's mouth and the feeling of being owned so completely.

 

Cid pulled out almost to the tip, before pressing himself back into the gunman. He began a slow and steady rhythm, able to feel the dark-haired man shuddering beneath him. He shifted his weight just a little, changing the angle. Amazingly, Vincent melted in his arms, voraciously attacking his lips and face with the stoking of the fire that was building up to a crescendo within him.

 

The pilot moved all his weight to his elbow, again changing the angle but pressing himself more firmly against the gunman's body and trapping Vincent's neglected hardness between their two sweat-soaked frames.

 

“Gods,” moaned Vincent. “Don't you dare stop.”

 

“Wouldn't dream of it,” Cid murmured, increasing the speed of his thrusts and brushing against that pleasure center each time. The gunman arched up into the blond's touch, bucking up to meet the pilot thrust for thrust. He could feel his erection being caressed by the friction between their two bodies, and he could already feel the molten sweetness that was pooling in his belly and threatening to explode. He slid his flesh hand down the blond's back and grabbed his ass, squeezing it tightly.

 

“Uhn… Cid…” moaned the gunman aloud, breathing heavily.

 

“Damn, Vince… you're so tight,” groaned Cid in return, unable to resist the temptation of looking down at his lover. The man was just too hot for words!! It became too much for the pilot, and he lost all sense of keeping a steady rhythm and making it last all night. He pushed in and out of the gunman in a frenzy, delighting in the purring whimpers issuing from Vincent's throat and the way the dark-haired man bit his lip with the sheer bliss. He stroked the gunman's pleasure center with each thrust, building the two of them up to a crescendo and fury that had never been met in any of their other encounters.

 

“…uhhh… C…CID!!!” screamed Vincent loudly, his entire body seeming to freeze with the force of his orgasm as he literally exploded between their bodies, his seed coating their stomachs.

 

Hearing his name on Vincent's lips in a moment of passion combined with the indescribable feeling of the gunman's spasming around him, Cid couldn't help but orgasm, climaxing deep inside the gunman and coating his insides with semen. He screamed incoherently, lost in the feeling of loving Vincent and being able to give as he had always wanted.

 

Cid collapsed on top of the gunman, breathing heavily. His whole body felt drained and sated and sticky… it was a good feeling. With great effort, he slowly pulled out his lover and rolled over on his side so that he was no longer crushing the gunman. He could feel Vincent still shaking from the aftereffects of the extremely powerful orgasm. He pulled the ex-Turk into his arms and relaxed against the bed, instantly feeling like he could sleep for a whole day.

 

Gods, he loved the dark-haired man! He couldn't remember when he had finally understood that about himself but now he was no longer afraid to admit it… internally at least. He had come close to saying it to Vincent, but the gunman hadn't let him at the time. Perhaps now he would be allowed…?

 

He opened his mouth to speak, but the ex-Turk beat him to it.

 

“….Thanks, Cid,” said Vincent in a soft voice. He almost sounded confused though still satisfied.

 

“Thank you for your trust,” returned Cid in a sleepy voice. He snuggled closer into Vincent's hair, breathing in the exotic scent.

 

“We should shower,” Vincent commented.

 

“Later,” murmured Cid. “Just let me stay like this for now.”

 

“Vince?”

 

“Hm?”

 

“Are you coming back?”

 

The gunman almost stiffened at the question, unsure how he was going to answer. It was as if the pilot knew his plans, despite what Cloud had said. Cid had made no mention as to whether or not he was going anywhere.

 

“… I can't answer that honestly.”

 

“Hmph. Just don't get yourself killed…” Cid's voice was getting softer now, as if he was speaking in his last waking moments.

 

Vincent didn't reply, instead falling silently as he listened to the pilot's breathing begin to even. His lover's arms slowly relaxed around his body.

 

For a moment, the ex-Turk just lay there, comfortable and seemingly secure. He breathed in the scent of their lovemaking combined with the lingering overtones of pina colada. He couldn't help the smile that broke out on his face. The gunman soaked up the warmth of Cid's embrace and entertained thoughts of just lying there forever, never leaving and confessing what was in his heart over and over… but there were things he had to do first.

 

Sighing softly to himself, Vincent slowly began to inch his way out of the bed. He eased out from the touch of the pilot's arms and carefully slid off the bed, barely disturbing it. Cid murmured to himself, and the dark-haired man froze… he felt almost like a coward to be doing what he was doing. Yet, the pilot merely shifted and snuggled deeper into the covers.

 

The ex-Turk turned and pulled up a blanket, covering Cid's naked form so that he wouldn't get cold in the middle of the night, then set about to find his clothes. He dressed quickly and silently his movements fluid. Vincent picked up his boots, intending on putting them back on when he left the room, but paused hand on the doorknob. He couldn't leave without telling the pilot… something.

 

Exhaling quietly, he turned and headed towards the table. He carefully rifled through the desk drawer finding a pen and piece of paper before he sat down and began to write. It was quite a difficult task for him as he tried to find the words without being sappy or overly melodramatic.

 

(Cid,

 

Please forgive my cowardice in not saying this to you personally, but I fear if I had… I may never have left to begin with and well… I have to know…

 

I have gone to find my purpose… to fight… to survive. There are some things I must take care of if I am going to join this battle, some pieces of my past that need to be closed. There are still unanswered questions…

 

I am slowly coming to terms with what… or should I say who I am and the events of my past. I have you to thank for that. Last night… between you and me… it will be something that lingers in my mind while I am searching.

 

I hope three days finds me back on this airship and you as well.

 

Vincent V.)

 

He stared at the letter, glaring at it critically. It would have to do, though he was not satisfied with the way it had turned out. Folding it once, he wrote the pilot's name on the front and then set it up on the nightstand. He found Cid's cigarettes and also placed the foul things next to it. He had a feeling the pilot would need them. He dared one last glance towards his sleeping lover before he picked back up his boots and headed for the door.

 

Vincent opened the door, peering out carefully, before stepping into the hallway, locking the door behind him. He sighed heavily as he considered going back in, and then shook his head forcefully.

 

He couldn't be what Cid wanted… not and still be broken. Perhaps after his journey… and after the battle… it might be something to look forward to.

 

He bent down and quickly put on his boots. Once they were sufficiently tightened, he headed for the cockpit. It was time to tell the pilot to take him to Nibelheim.

 

* * *