[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

//Star-Light: Chapter 12//

//By Julie
//rated NC-17 for explicit sexual scenes
//yaoi content. Male/male having sex, getting each other off
//Parings: Squall/Seifer then Squall/Zell

//Disclaimer: Don't own them. But I wish I did - as do most normal people. But ONE DAY! they will be mine. Oh yes, they WILL be mine!!!

==================================

Squall sat on the poffy white couch across from Zell - who sat in a matching poffy white chair. It was the living room of Squall's Dollet Loft.

Dead silence filled the room. Zell felt awkward, uneasy about being here. Although he knew why he'd accepted to come. Obviously a chance to be alone with Squall wasn't something he'd wanted to pass up. And surprising enough, Squall had let Zell snuggle next to him during the train ride here, two hours.

Zell had slept. It was almost 4 in the morning when they'd boarded the train, naturally the blonde had been tired. So he hadn't been able to enjoy being so close to Squall. But, it'd been enough to know a warm, strong arm had been wrapped around his shoulders.

Zell felt cold now, just thinking of that. He sat alone, even though Squall was just a few feet away.

And that dead silence was still there.

Looking at Squall, Zell could tell the Super Star was trying to think of something to say. His face was still in that frozen, stoic state, but the eyes seemed to be lit in storm.

Squall hadn't been able to meet Zell's eyes since they'd entered the loft. As much as he wanted to be with the boy, to talk to him, to touch him, to kiss him, to look at him - somehow Squall couldn't even think of something to say.

Here he was, a giant Super Star, Griever of Blood Kiss. And here he was, nervous. Again. For the fucking second time in his life.

He'd promised Zell that he only wanted to spend time alone with him. But he did want a passionate night of sex with the blonde. It had been his constant thought - sleeping with Zell - since he'd first found out where the boy lived after coming to Balamb.

His dreams only wettened Squall's desire. Giving way to his imagination on what he could possibly do with the blonde. What he wanted to do. What he needed to do.

Zell was the most beautiful creature Squall had ever laid his eyes on. From the very first instant he'd turned to look at Zell in that smoky, cum-scented house Squall had wanted to ravish the boy through. He had been hunting. Stalking a prey he didn't realize existed. And, honestly, he hadn't realized he'd been searching for this prey. For Zell.

The innocent bishounen desire. This creature that seemed to seep away Squall's indifference.

He wanted. He'd never wanted before.

Zell shifted in the chair. The room was cold. Icy. Not surprising, though. Griever's nature was cold, so it only seemed befitting of the loft.

Zell pulled his jacket tighter around him, pushing into the soft cushion of the white chair.

The dead silence still persisted. Zell now knew what most people felt like when talking with Griever. This was the first moment Squall hadn't anything to say to Zell. And it hurt slightly, because Zell had been hopeful that maybe there was something between him and the Super Star. As stupid as that sounded.

But that hope - or perhaps it should be defined as longing - That longing Zell had for the Super Star, for there to be something special between them, that was the reason Zell had come. That was the reason Zell wanted to be alone with Squall. That was the reason Zell wanted Squall.

And now Zell felt that nervous feeling. That sick, nervous feeling of regret.

Why was he here? Huh, well, actually he'd just figured that out. So...

Why had Squall brought him here?

Squall had never wanted. He'd enjoyed things. Naturally.

Sex. Alcohol. Singing.

Squall had Seifer to thank for each of the above. He'd been 15 when they first meet at a party. Seifer's band, then with a different singer and drummer, had preformed at the party a boy named Garrett threw. It wasn't anything huge, obviously. And Squall had actually been to the party only by coincidence. He'd never been social, and it was his sister that dragged him off to the event.

Back to the point: Seifer introduced Squall to alcohol that night. Three weeks later to sex. But it was over a year later that he'd introduced Squall to singing.

Maybe this was the reason Squall did anything for Seifer. Maybe this was why Squall so willingly gave himself up to Seifer. Maybe this was why Squall would hold Seifer, kiss him, touch him, love him. It wasn't real. With Squall, none of it was real, no matter how real Seifer wished it. But, Squall would comply with anything Seifer wanted.

And it made since to Squall, thinking over it now. Seifer had given Squall things to enjoy for the first time in his life. And Squall couldn't feel anything less or more for Seifer then this slight friendly affection.

But what did this boy give to Squall? This blonde bishounen. Why did he feel more for Zell then he did for Seifer? Why after one glance did Squall feel anything at all? Why did he want? What did this boy offer Squall that he couldn't find with Seifer?

Squall raised his eyes to look at Zell. Zell was staring at the floor, sapphire spheres glazed over. And that fucking twitch on the side of Squall's mouth immediately began to act up.

He looks so cute. Poor kid. Bored out of his mind.

It was instinct. A natural hunger that can't be explained in words. Past the lust that Squall plainly knew he felt for the boy. Past the enjoyment Squall got from the boy's smile and laughter. Past the beautiful, sparkling eyes that Squall seemed to find himself lost in. Deeper then the golden voice, and further down then the adorable expressions. Down into the depth of what is Zell.

The kiss. The sweet, fearless kiss, showing plain affection, yet holding so much back.

Zell offered Squall the emotion of desire.

Not sexual desire - that was part of it. It was the desire of-

"Why am I here?" Zell's youthful voice blurted out suddenly, shattering the silence like a hammer to glass.

-want. And Squall couldn't explain why. It was just instinct. A natural wanting desire no words can truly describe. Something inside just begged to know every part of Zell. And after living his life in constant indifference, Squall wasn't sure if he liked what this boy did to him.

"Are you even gonna talk to me anymore?" Zell said, hurt apparent in his tone.

Squall felt bad. "Of course," his whispered voice echoed empty across the room.

"Well, why am I here?" Zell repeated his question, intent on getting an answer.

Squall sighed, forcing himself to meet the swirling gaze of Zell's sapphire spheres. "I asked you to come," Squall answered in the same soft, flat, empty voice.

"Well, why'd ya ask me?" Zell insisted on getting the answer.

"I wanted to spend time with you," Squall answered.

"In dead silence?" Zell asked, his mood lightening slightly.

Squall watched the sparkles in Zell's blue eyes. "No."

Zell stood up from his chair, crossing the short distance of the living room, then plopping down next to Squall. Squall turned to face his body at Zell.

"Talk," Zell insisted, half smiling a less-then-bright grin.

Ice thickened the air as Squall searched his mind for something to say to this boy. Gods damn his indifference. Or lack there of in this certain moment. Squall swore he could actually feel Zell's heart drop in disappointment.

"I know your a Rock Star," Zell said softly. "And I'm not nothing compared to being Griever. But I thought... that you sorta... liked me. That it was different between us then... well... Never mind, its stupid."

"No, Zell," Squall said in his normal smooth, light tone. "Its not stupid. There is something different between us." Squall locked eyes with Zell. "And I thought I told you before: You're only nothing, if you think your nothing. You're only a Star if you think your a Star. It only matters what you think. Don't... don't you dare waste your life thinking your nothing. ... Because... 'nothing' couldn't do this to me."

Squall reached his hand over and caressed Zell's tattooed cheek.

"Why'd you bring me here?" Zell asked the question again.

"To be with you," Squall answered. Not a very satisfying answer. For either of them. Come on Squall. You're being a moron again. Are you going to seduce the kid? Or are you planning on boring the kid to death? ... You've thought long enough over these stupid feelings. Have you ever denied yourself? No. So why deny you want the blonde? Stop thinking and give Zell your fucking attention. He wants it. He wants it? Squall looked back to Zell, seeing the sapphire swirls had glazed over again. What else would be doing here?

"No," Squall whispered, bringing Zell out of thought. "Not to be with you. ... To have you, Bishounen. Because I want you. And I've never wanted anything."

Leaning forward, his hand still touching Zell's tattooed cheek lightly, Squall brought his lips to Zell's - to brush over the pink flesh of Zell's mouth. Zell pushed forward to lock his lips with Squall.

~*~

Seifer walked down the hall to Hazen's room. Loud music, voices, and laughter pour from under the door, seeping into the hallway.

He'd hoped that there would still be a party going on. He needed to distract himself from the thoughts of Squall and that blonde. It would be easy enough, hopefully, to find something to fill the space of time his insomnia brought.

~*~

"Zell... I-" Squall started, but Zell's lips locking with his own again stopped him.

Lost in the act of having Zell's lips pressed to his own, Squall had managed to take off Zell's coat and his own. Then standing up, still having the blonde's body pressed tightly against his, they'd slowly inched their way towards the stairs of Squall's loft - planning on taking the blonde upstairs to his bedroom.

Then Squall realized that this completely contradicted his promise to Zell about not taking him here to have sex. So he'd stopped. And it was Zell, instead, who persisted.

"Why do you think I came?" Zell whispered, breaking the kiss briefly as he spoke, his hot breath pounding on Squall's mouth.

Squall's entire body tingled at the thought of actually being able to have Zell in the way he'd dreamed. And wrapping his arms around the blonde, Squall continued the kiss, pulling Zell to the stairs again.

~*~

Seifer sat in the large, smoking hotel room. It was filled with many people: band members, a few groupies, some lucky fans that had back stage passes, and a few boyfriends/girlfriends of the band members.

The party had started down near the stage center, but it now continued here in Hazen's hotel room. And Seifer was glad of the noise, but he still felt the lingering jealousy.

He couldn't explain it, why he was so jealous of the blonde. What made him think that the blonde could make Squall feel? It was stupid. Squall's never felt emotion. True, he'd hid being with Zell, but not really purposely.

Squall'd just never shouted at the top of his lungs that he'd found a cute little blonde. And he hadn't acted any different to Seifer during these few days in Balamb. So it was stupid to feel jealous.

But Seifer couldn't help it. After all, Griever had been his soul property from the very instant they'd meet at that party when he was 16 (Squall'd been 15).

About to give up and just drink himself into a coma, Seifer lifted his brandy up to drown his stomach in alcohol. But then that spunky little brown haired girl bounced over, dragging with her the dark brown haired boy and that dirty blonde haired boy.

Three of Zell's friends. Selphie aka Princess. Matt and Xenith.

Selphie bounced on the couch next to Seifer. "Whatcha up to?"

Seifer lifted his glass. "About to get shit faced," he declared, then moved the glass to his lips.

Selphie took the glass away from Seifer, smiling. "But I thought we could have a little conversation."

Seifer frowned at her, watching the girl put his drink on the coffee table. Looking up, Seifer saw Matt smirking but the Xenith kid looked a little shocked.

Seifer sighed, turning back to the brown haired girl. "What's up, Princess?"

"Just thought we could have a little conversation… bout what? Ummm…" Selphie thought it over. "You!"

Xenith groaned. "I'm going to go find Kyle..." he mumbled.

Matt smiled. "Think he's following Merice around."

Xenith nodded and walked off.

Matt walked to sit next to Seifer on the other side.

"-about me?" Matt heard the end of Seifer's sentence.

"Why not talk about you?" Selphie asked.

Seifer groaned. "Princess…listen I-"

"I guess I'll talk about me then," Selphie said with a small, pleased smile. "Let's see…"

Seifer groaned again, closing his eyes and leaning back in the chair.

~*~

Squall couldn't believe what was happening right before his eyes. The soft, lightly tanned skin of his bishounen desire was slowly being uncovered. But Squall's cloudy, lust filled eyes were trapped in Zell's gaze. The blonde kept his eyes locked with Squall's as he stripped, his eyes sparkling with hunger yet waiting, longing for approval.

Squall's chest tightened. He couldn't breathe. He couldn't even remember how to breathe. His entire body tingled with need. He was frozen with hunger, lost in desire, and filled with yearning.

His lips were dry, but he couldn't even remember how to move his tongue to wet over the chapped flesh. And as the bishounen began to unbuckle his belt, saliva watered through Squall's mouth in a wave of hunger.

Reaching his hand out, Squall caressed his fingers over Zell's chest lightly, barely making contact with the soft, sacred flesh of the young boy.

And then, Squall's bishounen desire was completely unclothed. His body far more beautiful then what Squall had ever dreamed - and he had dreamed…

Letting the blonde continue the motions of unclothing, Squall stood frozen, the boy slowly unbuttoning the bright blue shirt.

Squall's breathing had returned to him. But now, it was uncontrolled, ragged breathing of heavy, hungry air. And the saliva that drenched Squall's mouth was finally able to find its way over the chapped flesh of Squall's lips as his tongue was able to work again.

Zell's strong, young hands pushed the soft blue shirt from Squall's shoulders, sliding it down the brunette lion's arms, letting it fall to the floor. Then the hands came back up to caress over the newly uncovered skin of Squall's chest.

The young hands moved up, touching lightly over Squall's neck, before pulling the brunette down to meet him in a kiss.

At first it was chaste: their lips unopened and pressed lightly against one another. It was sweet, innocent, and soft: the wonderful joining of their mouths.

And, of course, once Zell flickered his tongue over Squall's still closed lips, the kiss evolved into a more passionate locking of desire and absolute need. They explored each other's mouths, tasting the sweet, pure pleasures of the passion in the simple act of a kiss.

It was like nothing Squall had ever thought to imagine. And nothing he'd ever dreamt to feel. It was heaven beyond any recognizable means. This was lust. This was ecstasy. Giving in to this wanting desire. And he wanted more.

Breaking the kiss, Zell turned his eyes down to where his hands now fumbled with the clasps on Squall's dark blue, leather pants.

Squall watched his bishounen's hands, the bulge in his pants building. His own hands lightly caressed the soft of blonde's shoulders and neck. And then Squall felt the warm palms press to his hips, pushing the leather down.

Then, he too stood naked.

~*~

Zell lay back on the bed. Squall's hands pushed his knees apart gently, spreading his legs. Then Squall pushed his body down, laying his hips against Zell's already hardened cock.

Leaning up to meet Squall's lips, Zell tasted the desire that burned inside of Squall.

"I want you," Zell said, his voice nothing more then a whispered confession of hunger.

"I want you, too" Squall's voice shuttered.

As Squall's lips locked against Zell's again, Zell could feel the raw desire pouring from Squall's entire body. Then the body on top of him shifted, reaching over to the bedside stand, opening a drawer and removing a bottle of lubricant.

Moving back into a comfortable position on the blonde, Squall pushed his bishounen's legs up. He coated his fingers lightly with the lube, looking up to Zell's sparkling sapphire swirls after he'd finished.

Keeping his eyes locked in the net of hunger that etched out from the sapphire spheres, Squall moved his hand to the tight, virgin opening between Zell's butt cheeks.

"Um hm!" a light groan escaped from Zell's mouth as he felt the penetration of Squall's finger.

Watching the expressions on Zell's face as he fingered the blonde, Squall could only think of how much he wanted to please his bishounen. How much he wanted the next few moments to stand still, how he wanted this to freeze in time, how he wanted for this to last forever for Zell. How much he wanted.

Pushing a second finger into the opening, Squall watched Zell's body react in pleasure, his voice groaning its own pleasured response. And then stretching the opening by spreading his fingers, Squall pushed another digit into the blonde, still watching the expressions on Zell's face.

Using his other hand, Squall was able to squeeze some of the lube out and coat his very swollen erection.

Removing his fingers from inside Zell, Squall shifted his body quickly, pressing the head of his cock to Zell's still tight asshole. His cloudy eyes never left Zell's face, wanting to see all the reactions from the bishounen.

Zell's lips parted, his chest filling then deflating with hot breaths of air. His eyes opened, sparkling in anticipation. Then Squall pushed himself into the boy.

"Urm! Uh hm…" Zell moaned, his face cringing in pain yet his the sapphire in his eyes seemed to swirl around the pupils with hunger.

"You alright?" Squall asked softly, freezing his body, letting Zell get used to the new, erotic feeling.

"More," it was hardly even a whisper from Zell's mouth.

Squall heard, and Squall filled Zell's request: pushing himself deeper, his cock squeezing further in. Halfway in, Squall pulled his hips back then thrust in slowly again. He repeated the short thrusting movements, listening to Zell's moaned reactions.

And after a while, Zell's hips were rocking up against Squall's, pushing himself harder and harder over Squall's pulsating cock

"Squall," the whispered, hungry voice of Zell moaned.

"Does it feel good, bishounen?" it was Squall's turn to hardly whisper.

Hugging Squall's body tight with his arms and legs, Zell heaved himself harder to Squall, pulling and tugging for Squall to get closer, to go deeper, to fill him more, harder, faster. "More!"

Squall obliged, eager to push himself as deep as possible into Zell. To be locked in passion with Zell. To feel every part of Zell's body, and to give Zell as much pleasure as possible.

And in a moment of erotic realization, Squall felt virgin. He'd never experienced anything as pleasurable as being with Zell. Nothing had ever felt as amazingly erotic and passionate as this. It was completely new.

These pleasures surpassed the simple kiss he'd shared moments before with Zell. He wanted to fill Zell completely, fall into the depths of Zell's spirit and pleasure him through and through.

He'd dreamt. He'd imagined. He'd lusted after. But this, thrusting himself into Zell's body, locking himself tightly with Zell, being together inside Zell, nothing he'd ever imagined to dream could have prepared him for this experience. This filling of his wanting desire.

And then he wished this moment would stand still, would freeze in time, would last forever.

Heaven was nowhere in sight. Long left below, Squall spiraling upwards, deeper and deeper into ecstasy itself with each thrust.

Then Zell's voice shuttered, his body gripping tightly onto Squall's cock, pounding the swollen flesh that Squall had filled Zell with. And as Zell's body buckled, he released his seed onto Squall's and his own stomach, their bodies stickling together with cum.

"…heaven," Zell's voice whispered at the end of his orgasm.

Hearing Zell's moan, feeling the blonde tighten and then release, Squall was flung into passion. His body pounded hard, deep, and hungrily into Zell. Then Squall no longer had control over his body. He was lost in the ecstasy he'd been falling towards.

His body buckled, thrust twice more, then he released his load into his bishounen desire. The ending, lasting proof of Squall's want filled into Zell.

Then Squall collapsed onto Zell, breathing heavily. He kissed the side of Zell's mouth, whispering "Yes, you are heaven."

~*~

The two new lovers cuddled in the large, soft blankets of Squall's loft bed, wrapping in each other's arms.

Squall caressed Zell's hair, kissing the boy's forehead. Zell opened his sparkling sapphire eyes, smiling up at his Squall.

"Zell," Squall said softly.

"Um?" Zell replied, watching his finger trace over the bare of Squall's chest.

"This was… the best birthday I've ever had," Squall whispered softly, kissing the blonde's forehead again.

"It's really your birthday?" Zell asked in a curious tone, meeting his bright blue eyes with the cloud storms of Squall's spheres.

Squall smiled his normal meek grin. "Yes."

Zell looked sad. "I don't have a present for you," he said softly.

"Baby. Bishounen," Squall said softly, "you are a present. The only present I ever wanted."

Zell couldn't believe it, but Squall's smile pulled onto the other side of his face, giving him a almost normal grin. (But still fairly meek.) The cloudy spheres sparkling in satisfied lust, and happiness.

Zell smiled brightly, giggling quietly. He stopped laughing (still smiling), reaching up and pressing his hand onto Squall's cheek. He leaned over, pushing his lips in the same chaste kiss he'd given Squall the day he climbed into the train. Then it became more…

=========================

// Minor eh, thing...*cough* The reason Squall didn't have his boots on (nor Zell shoes) was b/c they'd taken them off when they'd first entered the loft. -- Yes, I really thought that, I didn't just mess up and skip over those items. It was planned out. (I hate taking off Squall's boots... they're a bitch.) ~*Julie