Flame Of Recca Fan Fiction ❯ What Matters Most ❯ Tell Me Later ( Chapter 8 )

DISCLAIMER: Flame of Recca is not mine. I'm merely borrowing it for mere fun.

What Matters Most

Chapter 9: Tell Me Later

I woke up early next morning feeling very… relaxed. Somehow, everything that happened yesterday seemed far off and unimportant. It was as if I poured out everything last night and--

Wait a minute…

What happened last night? As far as I'm concerned or as far as I could remember… Nothing… I couldn't remember anything. Unless… The dream I had was actually true! Mikagami-niichan really told me that… He really told me that… He'll always be there.

I smile at the thought. Finally, I've found someone I can trust. Or am I hoping too much again? Am I putting myself in another wild goose chase for someone who can love me? For someone who can truly love who I am?

I shudder at that thought. I don't want that to happen again. I don't want to feel lost after all the trust I've placed on that person. I don't want to feel betrayed or worthless just because I trusted too much. Am I really willing to give that another try? Am I willing to trust again… After all that happened to me? Will I be able to… Will I be able to?

"Oi, Koganei."

It was Mi-niichan. I wonder what he wants…

"Are you up yet?" He called through the door. Apparently, he woke up before I did. Iie. It was obvious he woke up before I did. The other bed was empty. And I smell breakfast cooking… And boy does that smell good! I wonder if it tastes good as well?

"Un! I'm up… I just woke up though," I said.

He opened the door and went in. He was dressed in his usual outfit but with an apron, obviously he was cooking. He looked at me and I saw something flash in those impossibly blue eyes of his. It was weird. That flash… It really seemed like he was worried about me…

"Refresh yourself and come out, all right? Breakfast is almost ready," he said, "And… "

I frowned, "Nanda, Mi-niichan?"

For a while there he looked utterly confused but he wiped the expression off quickly, "Nothing…" And he left.

"Hmm… Nii-chan is acting strange today…"

I came out of the bedroom only to be hit by a wave of the smell of pancakes.

"Smells good, Mi-niichan."

"Hn."

I sat myself and started eating what was served on the table, "Mmm! Oishi!"

He started eating himself.

"Ne, Mi-niichan… Ano… Thanks for… um…" I sighed. How come I can't bring myself to thank him? Am I really so full of myself that I can't bring myself to thank someone? sigh

There was only one reason why I couldn't bring myself to say it.

It was very, very embarrassing.

I promised myself I would be strong. To conquer anything without the help of anyone. I promised myself that I'd show father that I am worth the things he said I wasn't. I wanted to… sigh

Thinking about it made me remember so much. Saying something concerning that makes my head spin. But what I was doing was just a show of gratitude. Why couldn't I bring myself to say it? I myself said that I'd want any help the other day. Then… Why?

I snapped from my thoughts, "Gomen, nii-chan. Did you say something?"

"I said," he repeated, gritting his teeth, "Don't mention it. I was only doing it because what Recca did was wrong."

I stared up at him. "Demo… You went through all this trouble just for me. I still wanna say--,"

"Koganei," he said firmly, "It doesn't matter. The past isn't there to dwell or to mourn on, it's there… so we can learn from it."

I stared at him, speechless at what he said. Never in my life could I have guessed that Mikagami-niichan was a philosopher! I blinked hard and tried to let it all sink so I wouldn't forget. That was the first time anyone had ever said something to comfort me of my past. He may not have known it. He may not have realized it. But what he said lit something in me I thought I had lost so long ago!

He made me hope again. He, of all people, made me hope again!

I could've sworn the one who'd make me really live again was Yanagi-neechan! I mean, I didn't go do everything I did for nothing, right? I pulled away form Kurei because I felt she was the one who'd really give me what I've always wanted. She was so full of it! And when Kurei did that to her I was determined to save and protect her. Just because I felt she was the one. But I never expected this to happen!

Mikagami-niichan's words were simple but they went through me like… like… Argh! This is so weird!

But even if the situation wasn't what I expected, I felt grateful. Life was still good to me. I think…

"Oi, Koganei."

"Ah?"

"About last night…"

I frowned, I was starting to worry he'd deny what he said last night. Anyway, I braced myself for he continued…

But he didn't say anything. I looked up at him and said, "What about last night, Mikagami-niichan?"

He looked expressionless as ever and my tension was growing by the second, "Mi-niichan?"

"Do you… Do you remember… What you said last night?"

I looked down, afraid to meet his gaze. I didn't know why. I felt weird. I think I was acting weird in front of him.

"Oi, Koganei… Do you remember?" He asked again.

I gulped and said, "A little…A little… "

"Oh," was his reply, "Like what?"

"Like… like… A dream, iie, it was a nightmare… Then I woke up and… That was the blurry part… I can only remember bits and pieces of it."

"Do you remember what you said to me?" I looked at his eyes and he said, "Do you?"

"Mi-niichan… I remember I told you that I--,"

I didn't continue. Why? The door opened suddenly. It was Fuuko-neechan.

"Hey, Mi-chan! Ohayou!!!" She screamed. She stared at me suddenly, realizing I was in the room. I winced. I didn't like that stare.

"What's he doing here?" She pointed at me.

"I took him here, why?" Nii-chan answered.

"Iie. I was just curious. Ohayou, Koganei," she said dejectedly, "C'mon, Mi-chan. You promised me you'd go with me! Hurry up, will ya?"

"I'm coming, Fuuko. Koganei…" He turned to me, "I'm leaving for a while. Don't mess my place up, ok? If you're hungry there's food in the fridge."

"Hai, Ni-chan. I won't mess your place up!" I said cheerfully, trying to lighten the mood.

Both he and Fuuko went out the door. I sighed.

"Koganei."

Mikagami was at the door again, "Hai, nii-chan?"

"Tell me later." And then, he shut the door.

I shrugged.

"Doesn't matter if I remind him… But what's weird is… Why does he want to know?"

I shrugged again.

'Tell me later' huh?