Fruits Basket Fan Fiction ❯ Aya's Night Job ❯ Night Three ( Chapter 3 )

Aya's Night Job

By, Jamie1317kast

 

Disclaimer: Furuba is copyrighted to Natsuki Tatsuya, not me.

 

AN~ don't ask, just an idea that popped into my head while I was Rping Fruits Basket. We thought that, if Ayame had a night job, this would be it.

 

Rated R for graphic language and other stuff…

 

Aya's Night Job, Part Three:

 

*Ring*

 

*Click*

 

Vocal recording: Hello, you've reached Anime Gays Anonymous, or, AGA. Please select one of the following services have a nice day.

Press;

1~ For confession

2~ To complain

3~ To talk to someone who understands

4~ To have gay phone sex

5~ To send a message to your secret lover

6~ To get advice

7~ To request information

8~ To request dress sizes

9~ For more advice

0~ Just pick a number already!

 

~

 

Kagura: hm… one or three, one or three… okay! Three! *beep*

 

Ayame: Hello, you've reached our-

 

Kagura: Aya!

 

Ayame: uh, Kagura? This is anime gays anonymous, not anime lesbians anonymous.

 

Kagura: I know, but Sensei(Shigure) told me to call.

 

Ayame: oh, he did? And, pray tell, why?

 

Kagura: *deep breath* Well,becausei'vesecretlygotacrushonTohru,buti'mnottellinganyonebecausei'maf raidthat

i'llgetlaughedatbecausei'msupposedtolikeKyo!

 

Ayame: Heavens, that was a mouthful.

 

Kagura: of course. I like Kyo too, so mouthfuls are something I'm good at.

 

Ayame: *shocked silence*…

 

Kagura: What?

 

Ayame: he..actually let you…?

 

Kagura: oh, yeah, duh. I mean, jeez, after Yuki practically abandoned him to go pimp off with (insert family member here), you'd think that the poor gay boy would be crushed. And he was, respectfully. So, I did the only thing I could think of to help him, aside from give him fashion advice, but that was a given.

 

Ayame: hold up, Kagura. Two things; so, you gave Kyo a blow job to make him feel better?

 

Kagura: yeah.

 

Ayame: and… you gave him…fashion advice?

 

Kagura: he asked for it!

 

Ayame: *pause* I am now contented in knowing that any given member of my family is more insane than me! *happy smile*

 

~

 

Shigure & Ayame: *having gay phone sex*

 

Shigure: oh, Aya! More, more, oh, Aya!

 

*click*(the other phone being picked up)

 

Ayame: oh, Gure-san!

 

Tohru: um, …Shigure-san, am I interrupting anything?

 

Ayame: ! *cough, laughter, cough* hee, hee!

 

Shigure: Aya, it's not funny! No, Tohru-kun, not really…Aya and I were just…talking.

 

Tohru: oh, okay. *smilie face* but, ano..Shigure-san, do you have to lock yourself in the bathroom to talk to Ayame-san?

 

Ayame: you're in the bathroom? I thought you were in your room.

 

Shigure: oh, well, my room's 'taken'.

 

Tohru: oh, I noticed that. Who's in your room Shigure-san?

 

Shigure: um…Kyo and Haru are using one of my novels for…'research'.

 

Ayame: *cough*IthoughtHaruwasstraight*cough*

 

Shigure: he turned back for Kyo because-

 

Tohru: but why do they need to lock themselves in-

 

Shigure: Tohru,…is something burning?

 

Tohru: *gasp* oh no! the tea! *click*

 

Ayame: good save, Gure-san! Now, why did Haru-

 

Shigure: because they're both gay, and they both miss Yuki, so they just decided to go and fuck each other instead.

 

Ayame: Gure-san, I didn't know you wrote yaoi novels.

 

Shigure: Aya… I write everything.

 

Ayame: you should do book tapes!

 

Shigure: oh, yes, I know.

 

Ayame: do you do…book signings?

 

Shigure: of course I do. I'm a writer.

 

Ayame: do you sign… body parts?

 

Shigure: oh, anything for you Aya.

 

Ayame & Shigure: Yes! *thumbs up*

 

~

 

*ring, ring*

 

Ayame: I don't want to anwser it. *whine*

 

Rin: You have to anwser.

 

Ayame: but it's Sohma House again!

 

*ring, ring*

 

Rin: if you don't anwser, I'll castrate you with a rusty spoon.

 

Ayame: I can live without my package. *desperate*

 

Rin: or…*evil smile* I'll tell Shigure that you're cheating on him with…*thinks* George Bush!!

 

Ayame: Aiee! Spare me mistress!! *cringes*

 

*ring, ri-*

 

*click*

 

Ayame: Hello-

 

Akito: -on the table. Then he took his stethescope and shoved it up my-

 

Ayame: *hangs up*

 

Rin: why did you hang up?

 

Ayame: *leering* do YOU want to be the operator for a while?

 

~

 

Ayame: hello, this is AGA's confession hotline, please confess your sin.

 

Yuki: *sobbing like a woman on PMS and chocolate* it's not fair!! *sob, sob*

 

Ayame: yuki?*surprised* um…what's not fair?

 

Yuki: *still sobbing* Haru and Kyo both ditched me to go fuck each other and now Akito doesn't even want me because he's too busy fucking Hatori and *deep breath* I just thought I'd pimp off Hiro and Shigure and Kureno but nobody loves me anymore so I was at the park yesterday and I got raped-

 

Ayame: you got raped? Oh, my poor little brother! Who was it?! I'll castrate them with something very painful! *determined*

 

Yuki: *sob, sob* it's too painful to talk about. *sniffle*

 

Ayame: Yuki, you can tell me anything.

 

Yuki: *sob, sob* I got raped by some American woman-thing.

 

Ayame: a woman…thing?

 

Yuki: yeah, *sniffles* someone by the name of Micheal Jackson.

 

~