Fruits Basket Fan Fiction ❯ Musouka ~ Dare to Dream ❯ Shape of My Heart ( Chapter 37 )

Chapter Thirty-seven

 

When I have everything to lose, then I'm all for it.

 

Roselle Harrington

 

Shape of My Heart

 

 

It was in the middle of winter that I was born into this world. I was lively and spirited, my father and mother were dear and blissful of my well being. But that was before, that was before the cherry blossoms bloomed among the sakura trees that lined the boundaries of demon and human territories. This was when the ground was frozen, chilled by the snowy blanket Mother Nature had given it. The trees were bare, the sky was cloudy, the animals were asleep, and most of the demons had gone south till warmth approached Northern Japan. My mother and father decided to have me here, where it was less dangerous. They didn't want me involved with violence or blood, so they raised me in the high mountain range. Though my father was human we had to stay at the base of the mountains, but from time to time, I would wander up into the mountains, only to have my mother find me and bring me down, just to scold me.

It was hard to believe I was human actually, the only real human I have ever see was my father, my mother said she visited the neighboring human village every spring, but the spring after my birth was canceled, as I was still not weaned and it was a two day travel to the human village, even when a demon went at its fastest pace. At time to time, my father would tell stories, of how he was once a thief and was betrayed by his followers. I wondered what made him fall in love with my mother, yes she was lovely, but my mother didn't seem to like thieves, as she said she had to deal with enough of them in the past for at least another few more lifetimes. But I didn't seem to mind I couldn't after all, judge on either race without meeting more than one. But I was both, human and demon.

But I soon found out, my mother wasn't any ordinary demon. It was around the time I was ten that my father and mother went out to hunt, I desperately wanted to learn to hunt, but both parents said it was dangerous, too dangerous for me. But I followed anyway; I could at least see how my father killed our meals with his spear he so often polishes. Yet once I caught up with them, my father was on the ground, his left shoulder bleeding. While my mother was over him, tending to his wound. Her hands held the sheaves of rice she often held, but now where it should be shadowed as she blocked out whatever light there was towards my father, light began to glow. Like a flame that was just kindled. Slowly it grew brighter, there it stayed the same, and then it diminished. My father was no longer bleeding and was able to move without pain, but I spotted that no more was there a wound on his shoulder. I've heard only apparitions like Ice beings could heal and if plants are around, so are Plant-users. But my mother wasn't an Ice demon, and she hardly gave plants a second look unless they were rice crops. It was then that I realized she was more abnormal than the average fox demon.

Sometime later I returned home, waiting for my parents to come back home. When they did I told them what I saw, and my mother gave in first. She said she was Inari, the Rice Goddess. But what that made me I had no idea, I probably inherited her powers, but if I did, they made no sign of being existent.

It wasn't till I was no older than fourteen, since I was half-demon it was hard to grow fast, depending on the demon blood that resided within you. I'm half fox demon and half-human, therefore it would take another decade to grow a foot. My father even said I was the size of a turtle, though that was sarcasm (since I had no idea what a turtle was) because my mother told me human-wise that I was the size of a four-year-old human, but since I never saw any other humans, she compared me to bear cub. Yet around then, rumors spread. I heard the small animals talk to one another in high-pitched frightened squeaks. Sightings of larger animals like mountain lions and grizzly bears became rare; it turns out, from what I've heard from a possum. There were bounty hunters in the area.

It turns out they were looking for someone or something. I never figured out who or what, because once my parents got wind of it, they immediately suggested leaving. Some time later, around fall we were in a dense forest. The surroundings and climate was awkward and hard to adjust to as I was used to higher altitudes as I sometimes trained myself to track and fight up in the mountains, but most of the animals were much nicer than the ones back at the mountains where predators would sneer at me, but since I was around one of my parents, they would back off, hoping for another chance to poise.

But here, it was considered safer. I still had little idea of what a bounty hunter was, but `hunter' here was usually our names, as we hunted to eat. But if there were another hunter in the area, it would mean a struggle for who was the dominant hunter. It was something of an instinct that told me.

It was rather peaceful here, when winter came the forest was lovely. There was little noise so I could sleep for as long as I want without distraction. But on the day I finally awoke because of a disturbance, was the last day of staying anywhere near here. It was cold now for some reason, my demon blood shouldn't have had any trouble with this dropping temperature, but maybe it wasn't my surroundings that chilled me. It was the stench of sinister people, approaching where I was, along with my mother and father. I hurried over to them, something telling me that, whomever was coming, was coming for blood. My mother was already aware of whom was here, my father said it was the bounty hunters, and they were probably after us.

But what came next went so fast it surprised me I got away. The people that smelt of sinister character came out of nowhere and shot at us. My father grabbed me and we ran my mother not far behind. Her silver comrade, a giant fox was summoned and almost immediately she mounted it and they headed for us. My father slowed to catch her hand, but I heard the sound of a string snapping. Two arrows shot past my sensitive ears, the silver fox and my mother vanished, and my father collapsed. An arrow punctured his back, and obviously it was killing him.

“Go to…go to…go to the rice fields…there…you'll wait…” Those were my fathers last words, I crawled out from under him and panicked at the stench of blood. I fell down, terrified. I have seen it so many times on the animals that my father and mother killed, but now, as it streamed down out of my father's lethal wound. It bothered me so much, so badly…it had to be a nightmare…it had to be! IT HAD TO BE!

But the nightmare didn't end there; I heard the voices of the bounty hunters running for us. But to survive I had to run, but I couldn't leave him here, they would kill him…it took me a minute to realize, they already did. I felt for the first time this strange wetness run down my face, it continued to pour, it's moisture made my eyes blur but the sounds terrified me and I bolted. Running blindly, I had no idea where these `rice fields' were, or where my mother went. They vanished, both right there in an instant. Right where I thought we would flee to another place like we did before. But I was sadly disappointed, my father was killed and my mother vanished upon her silver mount. I was alone now, a small kit that any kind of large animal would like to devour. But at that moment, nothing seemed to matter. The only thing that did matter was me, I had to run, or I would never be able to see my mother again. Maybe she thought we would get out alive, so she disappeared. Maybe not, maybe she vanished to save herself. No, that couldn't be it, we loved each other. So…why did she go?

I fell to my knees and hands some few days later at the shore of a small lake and cried whatever else there was to cry. My high squeaks annoyed me badly; I didn't want anyone to find me, no friend nor foe. I didn't want to be seen like this. I wanted to be brave like my dad, I wanted to look like the brave warrior my dad was when he died trying to save me, and like my mom, you tried to save us. But now, there was only me, my own well being. I couldn't depend on anyone else now, I couldn't wait for someone to find me and hope they didn't have a monstrous appetite, I had to live, live alone if I must.

But these rice fields must have been where my mother used to go before she met my father to energize the food supplies and grow the rice crops in the fields. I knew it was two days away from my old home, but I was lost here. I didn't know which was north, and worst yet, I have been running for days, so it was possible that I ran even further from the village I was suppose to go to, and wait. But wait? Wait for what? Mother? My father is now gone, and my mother has to be somewhere out there. Did she find out Father died? If she did, did she think I died too? No, she would smell my blood, and I wasn't harmed in the run. So she must be out there, searching for me. If only I could show her where I was, I could be held again, in her safe warm embrace. I already hated the wilderness, being in the wilderness alone that is. Here I noticed there were different animal calls, most were mating calls. But most were threatening, probably looking for the nearest courtship to ambush a loving couple for dinner. I never stayed around too long to figure out what thing was hunting what? Eventually about a day later I stayed curled in a ball at the base of an old ancient tree, it smelled strongly of spiritual sense and magic I didn't think existed. But when I finally awoke because of the growl of my stomach I discovered a sheave of rice. No…it couldn't be…

I jerked around and sniffed the air, nothing. But there was a sheave of rice, something my mother often carried. But I would have smelt her, but apparently, she didn't stop by. But the sheave of rice, it smelled faintly of human. Was it left here on propose? To lead me to a human mission? I quickly ran with the sheave of rice clutched in my hand up to a hill, a huge burden of relief was carried off my shoulders. The whole time I was asleep, the whole time was here. I never realized just how close I was to my destination. Beyond the hill was the town with the rice fields I'm sure that my mother spoke so fondly of. This was the place I was looking for, maybe here, I would finally find her, spring was approaching fast, and she might just visit here this time.

When the people that were humans (they smelt of human beings) spotted me when I entered there was uproar. For a minute I almost fled, but they all ran to me and practically worshipped me. When everyone got to their knees and bowed down low, a man upon a horse trotted up to me and halted. There he got down and welcomed me here, for a minute I had an idea he would adopt me. It turns out, he did just that. I was brought to stay in the top family's fortress; there I was treated to the fullest. I was so happy I forgot my father's dying words completely. But at night when everything was quiet, unwanted images and his words came to haunt me. I would wake up in the morning saying everything was just a dream and they would both come for me like they said they would. The family that adopted me raised me like a queen, each morning I would be bathed and dressed elegantly. For a decade this continued, I slowly grew taller. The family members continued to die off after five or so decades and the heir would take over, I was treated the same by different rulers.

Some two centuries later the last heir of the family died, there I announced I would take over and the town rejoiced, the village was now the home of the descendants of those when I first came here, humans only lasted so long. As I stayed in this proud position, various rulers and lords and ladies from different lands greeted me and not once has my town suffered in a fight or war. I preferred to keep my people out of it, but at the same time, I became more aggravated with the dreams I had, the same nightmare I had on the first evening here. With the maturing I had gone through, not only have I learned of the still-living demon lords and ladies that continued to greet me, I began to realize just how special my parents were and thought much more into what they did and why they did. With that, I began to grow into depression, I snapped at those who asked what I wanted for dinner and preferred to dress myself. I no longer met with any other foreign leaders, so therefore my town began to grow isolated, and living off the food my presence grew. But unknown to me at the time being, the rice began to stop growing as abundantly, at the time I didn't anyone a chance to tell me so as I began to keep to myself more and more. My two tails would lash out and whip anyone who dared to cross my path.

By the time I gained my third tail, the economy was growing rapidly again, and it wasn't because of me, because I didn't know about the economy. I was deep within the fortress, so deep my servants could even find me, and even they searched, they would dare go in to look.

But one day, as I shifted my cross-legged position to a standing position (something I haven't done in the last few years) the voice greeted me and told me he was Cosiniak, the Zodiac God. Knowing nothing of him, I questioned many times, each tone of my voice grew more agitated and angry. He first disturbed me then has fun telling me how special he is compared to any other god and goddess. There he ticked me off when he criticized my mother.

“Typical, and you believed you would believe such a being again. If there's one thing you must understand in this world and life, is that promises are always broken. That's how it is, and knowing the type your mother was, Inari the Goddess of Rice was nothing but scum. I asked her once, she refused, but her powerful magic made my own backfire. That is why I am here, if you refuse, then you will be forced to carry the burden your mother turned away just so her daughter would suffer for eternity.” The booming voice of Cosiniak said, I wasn't convinced, for one thing I had no idea what he was talking about.

“My mother was not scum, so I suggest you take that back before I decide your fate. Yet before you go, it would be wise to tell me what you are here for and why. I do not understand you at all.” I spoke harshly, growling between me teeth hoping he would leave so I could sink back down into my depression.

“Oh yes, I had almost forgotten. Your mother told you nothing I believe. You see, as the Zodiac God I am in control of the zodiacs such as the Astrology Zodiac you would know as the ones above, Orion I believe was the hardest to contain. Then there is the next one I am now organizing, which I will be naming as the Chinese Zodiac. I have already thirteen animals participating in my race and soon after the banquet. I have come here to ask if you would like to join, of course, you cannot refuse my offer as your mother has done centuries ago before the first animal decided to join. If you refuse, it would be a phenomenal punishment…” I could almost see the half-wit back then sneering, it just angered me more.

“I could care less about your banquets and busy-bodies, I have my own life here. I will stay here till I rot! You understand! So get the hell out of my village! And let me remind you my mother is still out there! She will personally kill you!” I shouted.

“Like she personally left you? Poor little kit…only with three tails and have experienced so little. You were exposed to little greed and poverty. You don't know what the world is truly like; your parents kept you imprisoned, to keep you from seeing the outside world, the world beyond the mountains and forests. Yet what about those words from your father's dying breath? `You'll be waiting…' yes, you will be waiting, for a long time in vain…your mother will never come back to you, and your father is dead! He will not return either! No one cares about you as you! The village only loved you because they knew you were Inari's blood, the heir to her ancient power given to her by Minerva! No one wants you! So come to me, be within the Chinese Zodiac. There, you will have real friends where they won't leave you. Or face the consequences!” But to hear all that was futile, the anger and depression that my insanity fed upon doubled, tripled, quadrupled; I was beyond crucial point!

“I'LL DECIDE ON WHETHER I WANT FRIENDS AND IF I RATHER STAY HERE THAN GO AND JOIN YOU DAMNED ZODIAC! I DON'T CARE WHETHER THIS VILLAGE ONLY NEEDED ME IN THE BEGINNING! I DON'T CARE BECAUSE THEY CARE ENOUGH FOR ME TO LEAVE ME ALONE! THAT'S ALL I WANT AND YOU DECIDE TO JUST BARGE RIGHT IN BUT YOU KNOW WHAT! I DON'T CARE SO GO DOWN AND BE A GOOD LITTLE GODBOY AND GET ON WITH YOUR LIFE BECAUSE I'M NOT JOINING!” I slammed my fist into the wall and let out a high shrill scream. The wall cracked and then exploded in little fragments of rock and wood, my skin and clothes were torn and blood flew, but I didn't notice. All around me I heard screams, all around me, the walls cracked and began to fall. I jerked my fist out of the wall and ran, dodging out of danger here and there. I followed my own scent I had when I went into the room I resided in for years. But when I spotted the exit and I stopped, I could no longer move. The rest of the fortress remained standing, but I remained there, in between the several cracked shoji doors, rice paper walls, and above the splintered wood. I was frozen, was this the result of my actions towards the Zodiac God? If so, I would finally have peace.

But it didn't last long, I finally could move several days later, but I couldn't leave the fortress. There was some kind of barrier around it; I couldn't escape till I learned further magic in my centuries as a fox hanyou. But, foxes as it seemed came to me automatically here and there, and my inner fox wished to leave this forsaken place. But I found out why I couldn't leave, it was because of my human and demon blood, both were to be trapped here. That is why anyone who dared to come could not leave, they gave me no choice to feed off them, as I had no other food sources and they would die from starvation anyway. But the more I saw my fox messengers leave and enter, I figured that if I could somehow splinch myself from my fox counter part I inherited from my mother (who was at one time a normal fox), that fox could leave with a bit of my spirit, so I could see the rest of the world, and meet these so-called Chinese Zodiac.

It was painful, excruciatingly painful. I sat there on a cold evening, my bones heavy with chill. Every moment I spent was on summoning the fox within; it meowed loudly every time it hit a nerve. My bones felt like snapping, and my heart and organs quickened their actions, it wasn't long till I passed out, feeling my only accepted presence leave my body.

My drowsiness soon ceased as I awoke. It was dead silent, eerily silent. As if I were in at a human burial. Thus, giving out that awkward, uncomfortable, and unbearable feeling. I felt as if I lost someone…so dearly close to me, that compared to my father's death, it was - nothing…but how could I think, no, feel that way when I was so devastated by my father's sacrifice? Was it because it left me? Did it truly leave me for good? Somehow, I don't think so; I'm still connected…

 

As long as it still exists apart from me…I can never be set free…

 

 

What was that? That…some kind of jolt….but for what? Eriko had spaced out amongst the three men, who were constantly exchanging puzzled expressions. Every now and then looking at one another, she didn't finish her snide comment, which was unusual, nowadays when she did say something sneaky, it would at least end with a period. But just that moment that took place several minutes ago, she trailed off and her eyes gave out samples of far away gazes. Eriko continued to look away, as if she didn't know there were others in the room.

“Um…Eriko-kun?” Shigure started, but immediately closed his mouth when Eriko came to and shifted her gaze towards him, her eyes were sharply narrowed, her pupils were blurred and a strange gleam glinted upon her irises, it made Shigure shiver slightly, making Kazuma and Hatori notice there was something amiss. She knew she was the only one who heard it, the only single simple sentence that obliterated her attention towards the audience. The only problem was that it wasn't simple, she recognized the voice, and didn't like it one bit. The voice, was her own. Or at least, it sounded terribly similar to hers. But how come she was the only one that heard it?

“You are not the only one shrouded in regret and agony Dear, the one that sits before you does more for himself, then what you are led to believe.” It was again the feminine and sly voice with no body. But also, she was again the only one who seemed to hear it. Yet even so, bad vibes suddenly became noticeable by her canine nerves. They radiated off of Shigure, and to her annoyance, was the selfish demeanor she had now just discovered, something she should have discovered earlier, but had no common sense to look too far into. Her words from the past came back to her-

 

He's giving off the stench of mischief, I definitely know he'll be trouble…

 

No, she did know, she did know a part of his real demeanor. Mischief was one of them, cowardly was the another; playful was another, and another she just discovered, selfish. This guy was like a jellyfish, the Dog no doubt now; she remembered his voice in her dream coming from the Dog. Shigure must be possessed by the Zodiac Dog. But what made him selfish, what was she led to believe? Maybe she wasn't the only one fooled, maybe he had tricked Yuki, Tohru, and Kyo as well? If so, then who else had fallen to his self-centered trickery? At present actions, he was worse than the Fox. If they were like these thousands of years ago, she would be part of the zodiac while he was the one suffering as the outcast. But then again, if she knew he was cursed and some other twelve members were cursed, would he know if she and her family were cursed? He probably did, he grew up with Sunmei and whoever else.

“Why so silent all of a sudden Eriko-chan?” Kazuma asked, remaining calm along with Hatori as Eriko gave Shigure her vicious glares that eerily resembled a carnivore posing to pounce on its grudge.

“I know you're cursed,” Eriko said without thinking. Hatori made no sign of shock, while Shigure looked away and Kazuma sighed silently.

“Did you sense it at all?” Hatori asked.

“Dream-wise,” Eriko answered, as she blinked, her eyes returning to the normal glares that she now sent at all three of them without moving her position. “But anyway, I want some answers. You either give them freely, or I'll see how far back your arms go before they snap out of their sockets.”

“No need for empty threats,” Hatori said, Shigure drew out a cigar.

“Please, not he-” Kazuma started, but Eriko interrupted him.

“Sunmei hates smokers, surprised me that you smoke.” Eriko said calmly, with acid at the tip of her tongue as the words ran across her windpipe and out of her. Shigure froze, not daring to reach for the lighter. “I overheard your conversation at Kaibara, care to explain when my cousin Sunmei returned, why I did not catch whiff of her when I was at my estate, and why, perhaps, was Mei kept in the dark?”

“Noami was right, there was someone outside the door.” Hatori muttered as he shot a glance at Shigure, who put the cigar away immediately. “That was a personal conversation.”

“What are you going to do about it? Erase my memories? I assure you that you will not get close enough to do so, at least, not unharmed anyway.” Eriko said, eyeing the three, knowing all three could overpower her at once, but she wasn't one to give up without a fight.

“I never intended on erasing your memories, especially when I was waiting for you and the others to figure out one another's similar ways via curse.” Hatori began.

“You were waiting for us to discover one another's curses?” Eriko asked.

“Correct, shouldn't be too long till Yuki and Kyo figure it out, though it's strange Kisa has already began sensing everything now, but since she does not know anyone of the Holiday Curse, she has come to abrupt meetings from her sense tracking.” Hatori said, Eriko's eyebrows raised in confusion, but quickly shifted back into their original condition.

“So who is this Kisa?” Eriko asked.

“The Chinese Tiger, Kaede has sensed our curse as well. If you're wondering, Tigers are known for their sensitive characteristic, therefore allowing them to sense spiritual things at a younger age before anyone slightly older than themselves.” Hatori answered.

But for some reason. That's not what's pissing me off… Eriko looked over at Shigure again, he wasn't looking at her, but it appeared as if he was trying not to look at her, she couldn't really blame him, and if looks could kill he would have been dead minutes ago, possibly on the first she met the pervert. Something's happening or has happened, and right now, when I'm suppose to be more curious on this whole sensing others curses and this Kazuma character. I can feel that Shigure is hiding something, and I'm willing to figure it out…

“Is that all?” Eriko asked. Then there was a jolt again, and almost instantly, darkness swallowed her. She was in the same position, surrounded by darkness, Eriko's eyes were wide, her pupils small and irises shaking. She began to pale as the most horrible feeling clutched her heart, as if willing to squeeze the life out of it if she refused to do what it said. But what the owner of the invisible hand wanted her to do was completely unknown. At that moment, Eriko was terrified. What was she supposed to do? Where was she supposed to go? Was this Kazuma the one she had to meet? Was he the one dearest to the Cat? Why must she have all these questions? And have no answers…?

“Why…why did you do this to me? Weren't we friends?” A voice spoke, Eriko recognized the voice as Sunmei's, where was she? Her voice echoed off the dark walls she could not see it was impossible to discover where she was from this point, but was it only a figment of her imagination? Wait a minute…

“I know you love her too…I knew I shouldn't have gone without saying farewell…but it hurt so badly just to decide to get the air plane ticket…” What if she wasn't at the estate of the Sanotomono? What if she was somewhere else, but where? Was she suffering? By the sound of it she was, because of whom? “We were friends from middle school Shi-kun…I cared about you so much, you gave me all the attention any girl in the whole school wished for, but you never once asked if I were happy…neither of us did…”

She was suffering, so badly at that. She was mourning, over Shigure. Eriko's head spun, her heart raced with an enmity she thought she never had. Sunmei was her family, Sunmei was a cousin that truly cared for Eriko and the other cursed ones like Noami and Mihoshi. Like Sarah and Dikatou, they all cared for her. Yet, they suffered from their own pasts and regrets, because of her parents deaths, she was raised by her aunt and uncle and cousin. She only just met her eldest brother not long ago, and he cared for as well, even though she was cursed. But why would Sunmei suffer? What was she talking about? She didn't deserve so much pain that Eriko was now experiencing, did Shigure do this to her?

If so, she felt her body jerk. Her skin prickled from an eerie and disgusting feeling, how could he? How could he do anything to someone like Sunmei? She felt a sharp sensation run along her limbs down to her fingertips, her gums shared the same feelings as well as her legs and toes. Something bustled and lashed out from behind her, her ears shot up and were more alert than ever. Her body was completely different now, like the night when she murdered the crazed teen. Heated hatred ran through her veins like it was boiling. Her heart pounded hard and her brain went out of work for the time being, as it continued giving her repeated instructions and thoughts.

What did she ever do to him?

Punish him…

She's hurting like me…no one deserves that…but me!

Show him how you feel…

What happened between you two that drove you to do this to someone so wonderful!?

Show no mercy…

I care little for the lowlives, but for someone that went even lower, there's always an exception…

Punish him!

“YOU BASTARD!” The darkness vanished and the first thing she saw was a shocked Shigure as she lunged for his, her clawed hands clutched at the front of his kimono and the weight from herself and from the unexpected attack caused Shigure to fall back into the wall and ground. Eriko landed on top of the Dog. Hatori and Kazuma -whom were completely dazed for split second- were now going for Eriko, who had yet to realize she transformed into the human with fox characteristics. “PEOPLE LIKE YOU SHOULD DIE!” Kazuma grabbed hold of her arms and most of her upper torso while Hatori tried to relax her grip on Shigure. But the strain from her hands already cut her hands; blood was flowing freely down from her hands and onto Shigure. Kazuma was seemly powerless against her transformation as even the dojo master couldn't even loosen her grip on the Zodiac Dog. Her tail lashed about angrily like a whip, hitting anyone and anything it could touch. Kazuma noticed and quickly told Hatori not to turn his head towards the fierce tail, Hatori didn't look like he would do so anytime soon.

“WHAT DID YOU DO TO THE HORSE! SHE SAID SHE LOVED YOU AND YOU GAVE HER HELL!” Eriko cried, but it didn't sound much like her voice anymore. It was higher and more shrill, somewhat cunning and sly. It was her, her transformation of Minari. Eriko claws pressed against Shigure's chest, his blood mixed with her own. “AREN'T DOGS SUPPOSE TO BE MAN'S BEST FRIEND! BECAUSE YOU'RE A PATHETIC EXCUSE FOR A FRIEND YOU BASTARD! DO YOU HAVE NO SHAME!?”

“Eriko! Calm down! The others will hear-” Kazuma tried to reason, but there was already footsteps hurrying down the stairs.

“What's goin' on!?” It was Kyo; it made Eriko's mind click. Yet as soon as Kazuma and Hatori turned towards the stairs, almost instantly Eriko blurred away and was flashing by the forest that was upon the Sohma property, she wasn't ready to reveal her secret yet, not to Yuki and Kyo, not yet…

“What the hell is going on!?!” Kyo cried as the three teens who were told to go upstairs looked about the room in utter shock, Tohru looked ready to cry when Kazuma stood up along with Hatori, only Kazuma was free of blood as he was behind Eriko. Hatori's upper torso received a bit, but not much. Shigure was struggling to get up, neither one of them tried to assist him in doing so, but instead, tried to get him to stay down.

“I do believe we deserve an explanation,” Yuki said in a warning tone. Tohru buried her face into her hands when she spotted Shigure behind the two men, but no one tended to comfort her at the moment.

“Now is not the time, Eriko has run off-” Kyo cut off Hatori.

“AGAIN!” Kyo roared, “I swear she's just as cursed as we are!” Everyone except Yuki and Kyo exchanged worried glances, Tohru continued to sob into her hands.

“She did run off again Kyo, and now, I wish for you to stay here. She is at large now.” Hatori said, Yuki's and Kyo's eyes widened.

“She's at what? You mean she's…dangerous?” Yuki asked.

“I'm afraid so, you see she is not as different from us as you think Kyo, Yuki. I do not believe Tohru is oblivious to it as well.” Hatori spoke, Tohru looked up with a tear-stained face.'

“I know about her Hatori-san,” Tohru said, Kyo and Yuki looked at one another; baffled.

“What is there to know about her?” Yuki asked, looking from Tohru, Kazuma, Hatori, and then to Shigure, who was fighting to get up again.

“She's cursed, claimed by the spirit of the Fox.” Kazuma answered the silence came quick and hard. The only sounds were the grunts of pain from Shigure who now managed to use the wall as support and get to his feet.

“What are you doing Shigure?” Tohru asked with concern as he walked toward the broken and torn shoji door Eriko fled out of.

“She needs an explanation…before she hurts anybody else,” Shigure answered, Hatori looked stern.

“I think we would like one as well.” Hatori commented, Shigure nodded.

“And you'll get one, but Eriko is in need of it more at the moment.” Shigure answered as he slid it open.

“I think Sunmei would like one first.” Kazuma replied, Shigure smiled sadly as he walked out.

“Yes, yes she will.” Shigure murmured as he shut the door behind him. Leaving everyone in shock, and Hatori and Kazuma alone to explain what happened.

 

That bastard! Thinks he can do whatever he wants for hell who knows! Eriko mentally cried as she slowed down and collapsed to her knees, landing on her hands. Her tail hung limply to the ground, no longer harmful at the moment. Shigure's and her own blood stained her own fingers, and Minari's claws. This feeling she felt…was so unexplainable that she thought of suicide at one quick moment. But she couldn't, she could never do that, there would be too much misery for those who have come to the horrible fact that they cared for her. Yet either way, she would leave…

She coughed as the sky clapped, a droplet of water landed on her hand, then another, then soon, everything around her was crying. The sky, it was crying for her, in her place it felt like. No, it wasn't, no one had ever cried for the fate of the Fox. She didn't expect anyone to either, she expected nothing else but a few good-byes full of regret of ever meeting her, and then, total emptiness she had experienced as the Fox since she was born, or as long as she can remember.

She felt her arms grow weak, her fox characteristics began to diminish and the human strength she had was gone, but before she could hit the ground, a pair of arms grabbed her and pulled her up. But then she heard a grunt of pain, something hit the now watery, grassy surface beneath her, and she landed again something warm. It was hard for her to distinguish what or who it was because of her extreme fatigue and lack of vision and other senses. But she could her the pounding of a heart that bled of the blood that was now drying upon the being she was laying on.

“Shi…gure…e…” she muttered, the body shook from a small chuckle, but the eerie surroundings silenced it instantly.

“Don't talk, you're too tired.” He said, Eriko, even though they both sat in the rain, thought it was pretty comfortable, kind of reminded her of how she used to cuddle with Dikatou when she was little when he would tell her stories, when she would let him anyway. “I'm sorry…” Eriko's eyes widened, her heart began to fill with guilt, she was losing it, both mind and body. Now one died because of her, and another was hurt because of her. It was stupid of her, to think anything would change if she attacked Shigure, but it wasn't half her mind when she attacked him, Minari was there too…

 

 

Hmm, yeah, yeah

Baby, please try to forgive me

Stay here don't put out the glow

Hold me now don't bother if every minute it makes me weaker

You can save me from the man that I've become, oh yeah

 

“It's because of me Sunmei is suffering, because of my stupidity. I always wanted the affections that she had always gotten, but hers were only familial, I wanted something more than that from her. I guess I was jealous because I didn't rival her attention from her as much as Sunmei had gotten. Yet I still cared for Sunmei still, I should have told her I did, I never did…” Shigure began, Eriko tried to stay awake and coughed again.

 

Lookin' back on the things I've done

I was tryin' to be someone

I played my part, kept you in the dark

Now let me show you the shape of my heart

 

“After high school graduation she left for America, it was a few days after she left I was informed that she did. I was in truth, mortified and I felt, rejected. It wasn't till I took on the responsibility of caring for Yuki at my place did I bounce back, but heart still ached. I felt torn to pieces, I knew what happened back then and I knew I shouldn't have been so surprised…but, it didn't stop my heart from being so torn up…now, I regret so much…and I can't let my agony affect you because you're already suffering more than you should be…” Shigure said.

 

Sadness is beautiful loneliness that's tragical

So heal me I can't win this war, oh no

Touch me now don't bother if every second it makes me weaker

You can save me from the man I've become

 

“When she finally came back, I didn't know till I called Noami to tell her what was happening to the head of the Sohmas, Akito. But Sunmei answered instead, and I told her what happened, and the remorse I felt from when she left me so long ago, came back and I was sort of angry at her. She even questioned our relationship, like she doubted we ever had one. So I became a little more dramatic, and the next thing I know we hung up and later, it's discovered she returned back to the Sohma Estate. We haven't seen eye to eye yet at all…it's kind of sad, and I think I'm beginning to understand why she doubted our relationship. I'm terribly selfish, I put my feelings into her and she thought it was her duty to return back to Akito…” Eriko was closer to passing out, her fingers clutched his blood-stained kimono, but he didn't seem to notice.

 

Lookin' back on the things I've done

I was tryin' to be someone

I played my part, kept you in the dark

Now let me show you the shape of my heart

 

“You should…tell her…go…go-o…to her…and…tell her…” Eriko muttered, both of their clothes were soaked to the bone. Yet neither of them moved, not an inch. “She doesn't…deserve…the treatment she's…en-enduring now…don't, you-u think?”

“No, she doesn't deserve it. I know that as a fact, I've actually been thinking about it. But none of us can go against Akito, he is the head of the Sohma family anyway.” Shigure replied with a small grin. “You are kind of like Tohru you know?”

“No I'm not,” she growled, her eyes closing.

 

I'm here with my confession

Got nothing to hide no more

I don't know where to start

But to show you the shape of my heart

 

“But-but, there's only one…question…left,” Eriko said. “Do…you…lo-love… her more…than…a fri-friend?” Shigure pushed himself up with Eriko against his chest, clinging to his kimono. He grunted as he held onto her with his right and pushed himself up with his left, lowering her to the ground so he could stand. When he got to his feet, he bent down and picked the Fox up bridle style, almost instantly there was a small poof, Eriko had transformed into a small black fox, her clothes dangling in his arms.

“You shouldn't have that much stress Eriko…you know?” He bent down and whispered something in her ear, her ear twitched slightly. He grinned as he began to walk back. When they were half-way through, he couldn't help but feel something was wrong…

“Eriko?”

 

I'm lookin' back on things I've done

I never wanna play the same old part

I'll keep you in the dark

Now let me show you the shape of my heart

 

“Eriko! Answer me!” No response, her body had gone rigid. She wasn't awake, and her heart began to weaken. “We're almost there Eriko! Hold on!”

 

Lookin' back on the things I've done

I was tryin' to be someone

I played my part, kept you in the dark

Now let me show you the shape of my heart

 

“Hatori!” Everyone turned around as Shigure bounded in with little breath; Hatori quickly got the message when he spotted the limp black fox in his arms. Tohru gasped, Kyo and Yuki looked deathly pale, and Kazuma was showing great terror as Hatori took the fox in his arms, Shigure put her clothes aside as he came into the room, drenched. Tohru hurried off and came back with another kimono for Shigure and two towels for Shigure and Eriko. Hatori gratefully took one of them and bundled the fox in it. Shigure took the other and with his kimono and said something about heading towards the bathroom.

 

Lookin' back on the things I've done

I was tryin' to be someone

I played my part, kept you in the dark

Now let me show you the shape of my heart

 

“What's wrong with her?” Tohru asked, after five minutes Shigure left. Kazuma looked just as worried as the three teens. Hatori looked grim and dead serious when he took the stethoscope from his ears and her tiny body.

“I need you all to stay with Shigure, I need to get her to the hospital. You can join me later understand?” Hatori asked as he turned towards them. “Kazuma, do you think you can call up Noami and then call her other uncle, we need Yuri. Get hold of anyone you four would otherwise know she was close to.” Hatori ordered as he collected the towel with Eriko inside it. “She's most likely to transform when we get to the hospital, I think it would be wise to have some of her clothes though..." As if automatically, Tohru scooped up Eriko's clothing and gave them to Hatori. He thanked her and said farewell, and quickly left.

“I wonder how we're suppose to get to the hospital, Master sure can't drive.” Kyo growled, still ghostly pale.

“Neither am I trusting Shigure behind the wheel.” Yuki said in rare agreement. But it wasn't long till they discovered that they were the only ones in the room. Kazuma and Tohru had already left to the other room to make phone calls.

“Noami's number is 170-456,” Tohru said as she flipped through some book of her own. Kazuma dialed and put the receiver to his ear.

“Hello, Noami? Yes, this is Kazuma. It's been a while yes, but this isn't the time, this is urgent-” Yuki, Kyo, and Tohru had no choice but to endure the moments of pain-staking explanations that only Kazuma had the strength to muster. When Shigure came back he wasn't happy either, as he seemed to know where Hatori and Eriko had gone.

“Noami's picking us up,” Kazuma spoke from the kitchen, even though the situation was bad, they all couldn't help but sigh with relief.

 

 

A/N:

I'm so excited now! Don't worry, this isn't the end yet people! And yes, so there won't be any further confusion - Spoiler - Akito is a woman! For more information, go to http://lonelyriceball.com/journal/archives/fruits_basket/in dex.html where you can find out what Shigure is meaning to say! Not that I won't explain it later, but for those who hate being kept in the dark, go ahead, but I warn you, these are from future Furuba manga chapters! Many spoilers! Oh yeah and when you start reading these from Oishii start at the bottom! =^^= I hope you like it so far, I couldn't resist a bit of fatherly-ness from Shi-kun! Poor Eriko though, I feel kind of bad for putting her through this, but for a good story, it must be done! And so here ends my longest chapter yet! Now, onto the disclaimer!

 

Disclaimer: The song The Shape of my Heart is written and sung by the Backstreet Boys! So this song is theirs! And I love this song! It's on the cd album of `Black & Blue'.