Fruits Basket Fan Fiction ❯ Petals & Thorns ❯ Resurgence of Life ( Chapter 5 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

Petals & Thorns
Chapter 5: Resurgence

A/N: FB is the creative genius of Takaya-sensei. No money, don't sue. >.<

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[Tooru]

I'm surprised by the calm breeze in the air. As though nature was trying to soothe my soul. The sun is at it's highest point in the cobalt sky, creating a warmth to creep up my legs to my stomach. From here, I feel as though I can touch heaven itself.

And I smile.

For the first time in what feels like years since that horrible night. It's refreshing. I know it's only been a few months - as I had proof in my womb.

Four months and three weeks to be exact.
*******

At first I had thought that I was just suffering from post traumatic stress, and Hatori-san was so kind to me. He treated me even after he had seen my betrayal. No, not my betrayal. It was not my fault. I know that now. And Hatori-san tells me every night before we go to bed.

That night that Hatori-san had helped me to his office...when I thought that he had been so angry with me. I can't help but smile at my previous misunderstanding. Akito had nearly beaten me. But Hatori-san had been there to help restore my life. And to fill my heart.

I remember so clearly what happened when Hatori-san had covered me with a blanket. I saw the tears pooling in the sensitive man's eyes. And he had sat there for a few moments as I drifted off to sleep. I remembered the warmth in his hand as he caressed my forehead. And I vaguely remember him leaving the room before I was lost to my exhaustion.

My sleep was not restful that night. I still remember the nightmare. I re-lived every single thing that Akito had done to me. The beads, the ball... everything. I don't know how long I had been tossing, but I felt a strong hand behind my neck, helping me to sit up. He put a bowl to my lips and poured some liquid in my mouth. Even to this day I'm not sure if it was medicine or food that he had given me.

And he continued to sit at my side, until I had completely regained consciousness. The first image that I saw was his beautiful face.

He had smiled at me then and didn't say a word. He had told me that if I needed to talk about it - when I was ready to talk about it - that he would be there. From that day, he didn't really leave my side. And if he had to, he made sure that someone was with me all of the time.

And then I had asked him about erasing my memories - only the parts with Akito. He had frowned and said that he partially erase them, but that he strongly advised against it.

He said that because of what had happened to me, because it was so vicious, I shouldn't hide from it. I needed to actually deal with the pain. I needed to work through it. And he held onto my hand and said that he would stay with me and love me through it.

The few times that Hatori was not with me, Kagura - or Momiji was. For a while, I didn't want to be around their cheerfullness - but I remembered that they had been through suffering too. Maybe not the same level I had endured, but isn't all suffering the same?

I'm not really sure when it was exactly that Hatori-san and I had become close. Perhaps it was because we had shared something so humiliating?

I remember when Hatori-san came over to talk to Shigure-san about my living with him. Shigure-san was concerned about me being that close to Akito. But something that Hatori-san said stuck with me. He said that he would not ask me to live with him, if he thought Akito could actually do anything anymore. Hatori-san told Shigure-san that Akito was far too weak to be able to lift a tissue against me.

Shigure-san had an unfamiliar glint in his eye. He almost looked happy at the news. But he had said that it would be fine with him, if it was what I wanted. I had been standing at the door watching the two discuss me as if I was not there, and then they had turned to look at me. Shigure-san guaged my reaction. I smiled and nodded.

Shigure-san had given a confirming nod as Hatori-san grinned happily. I love it when his eyes crinkle as they did that day.

I have come to learn that that means that Hatori-san is happy. Not just content, but honestly happy.

It didn't take long for me to pack up the few things that I had considered truly mine.

Both Yuki-kun and Kyo-kun had met me at the landing. Yuki-kun was smiling sadly, and Kyo-kun was frowning as he stared away from me.

Even with their sadness, I knew they were happy for me. And I was happy. Truly happy. I had fallen in love with Hatori-san as the snow had melted that first day.

Hatori-san had purchased a bed for me, so that I could have someplace to sleep. Though I wanted to sleep in his arms, I knew that I couldn't possibly ask him for that. He had already given me too much.

And for a long time, that was how we lived. It was frustrating because I wanted to be with him. I wanted to have memories of making love with Hatori-san to erase my memories of being violated by Akito. But Hatori-san always said that we would wait.

My heart broke in two ways. First, because he always told me to wait. Secondly, because he cared enough about me to know that just as he couldn't erase the pain and trauma to my body and mind with his gift, he couldn't erase what Akito had done to me with his body either.

Amazingly enough, Rin and I became very close. I think one of the reasons that she didn't trust me before was because she felt that I hadn't suffered in the same way as she had. I'm not sure how she knew what had happened without asking me, but know she did. And she stopped by a lot after she realized it. Hatori-san and Rin-chan have both been amazing to me.

It took me a while to be able to face Uo-chan and Hana-chan again. I had avoided them, because of Hana-chan's powers, and Uo-chan's propensity towards vengence. I knew that they would both react rather violently - so thankfully, Hatori-san helped me with that. I don't know what he said to delay them, but I'm grateful.

The days when I started to heal were happier than I thought that they could have been. It was more than a month before Hatori-san and I finally made love.

It was better and more magical than I could have possibly dreamed. After the consummation, we placed my bed in storage and I shared Hatori-san's bed on a nightly basis.

Less than two weeks later, I started to get sick nearly at every thought or mention of food. I got headaches and my ankles swelled.

Hatori-san didn't need to examine me, but he did. As he thought, I was pregnant.

And the fear came back. And Hatori-san had sent for an ultrasound specialist to come and examine me.

And our fears were confirmed. I was almost 2 months pregnant. Quick mathematics told us that Hatori-san was not the father of my child.

I had sobbed and Hatori-san looked heartbroken. Once again, I had let him down. But he soothed me once again, stroking me hair and kissing my forehead. He asked me how I possibly could have prevented that from happening during ovulation. I knew that he was right. But still, I wanted my child to be born of a father and a mother who loved each other.

As the specialist had left the room, Hatori-san lifted my chin and spoke the most beautiful words that I had ever heard.

He told me that he wanted a child with me, and though the father of this child was not him - that he would raise him or her like they were his own. And then, when we wanted another child, Hatori-san would be the father and my husband. We would marry in a small private ceremony. Nothing elaborate.

I threaded my fingers through his and raised his hand to my lips. I closed my eyes as I smelled in the precious scent of the one who meant so much to me.

Hatori-san had told me that Akito had slipped into a coma and would not need to be told of this news.

We had gotten married a few days after that. Because everything had happened so quickly, my family was unable to attend - except for my grandfather and Uo-chan and Hana-chan. Shigure-san, Yuki-kun and Kyo-kun were there, as well as the other jyuunishi. There was a short reception after the garden ceremony. I had to retire early, because I wasn't able to handle the smell of the grilled fish that had been prepared.

I didn't notice the knowing wink that Shigure-san had aimed at my new husband, as Hatori-san followed me into the room to check on me.

And then I remember how surprised I was when Hatori-san had come home one night. He looked exhausted and he told me quietly that Akito only had a few days left. He said that it was an adverse reaction to a drug that Hatori-san had ministered.

In my mind, I wondered - but I didn't think that Hatori-san would do something like that.

I had wanted to go visit him, but Hatori-san would not allow it. I'm not the brightest person in the world. I learned to trust before I could walk.

That's why it's nice to have people watching over me. Especially Hatori-san.
*******

I am broken from my reverie by a warm hand on my shoulder, and then Hatori-san leaning toward me to caress my stomach. I closed my eyes and sighed happily.

Only Hatori-san would know the right way to caress my skin to soothe the child. And me.

Hatori-san looks sideways at me and captures my lips in a gentle kiss. His tongue lightly mingles with mine, before he lifts his face. His gaze contemplates my own.

"Are you ready to go?" His words are said so softly that I have to strain to hear him.

I nod solemnly. I take the hand he offers me and stand shakily. He threads his fingers through mine and squeezes gently.

He knows. He knows that I don't want to do this. That I'm scared to see Akito. Even deceased Akito scares me. Hatori-san leans into me and presses his lips against my hair, sighing softly.

"I'll be right here."

"People will know -"

"No they won't. They know that you're pregnant, and they know that we're married. They don't know that Akito..." His emotions are choked and he can't bring himself to finish the sentence.

Taking one last deep sigh, I turn back to look at the sky before we leave.

The car moves slowly along the road before we come to the family temple where Akito's body is displayed. Hatori-san parks the car and walks to my side to open the door. He offers me his arm and I take it gladly, thankful for the support.

As we approach the body, I can't help but fear that Akito will sit up and hurt me. As if he feels my tension, Hatori-san caresses my hand on his arm.

And a new thought fills my mind.

Perhaps this was what Akito had wanted all along. Perhaps this was the end of the curse.

I gaze at my husband's profile. Strong and sensitive all at once. And I wonder if tonight I may embrace him. And if he may embrace me.

The way a woman should be held.