Fruits Basket Fan Fiction ❯ The Ceremony of Innocence ❯ Points of Light ( Chapter 3 )

[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]

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The Ceremony of Innocence
a Fruits Basket fanfic by Ysabet MacFarlane (ba087@chebucto.ns.ca)

Chapter Three: Points of Light [3/10]
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The change started immediately. Kyo's skin began to steam as he staggered, one
hand flying up as if to shield his eyes from a light brighter than the day's
overcast sun. His bare wrist was a vulnerable pale gleam against the rest of
his skin. A trace of the unique stench that clung to his true form began to
permeate the air as he moved desperately toward the alleyway a few meters
beyond.

Tohru did the only thing she could think of. She ran toward Kyo and the mouth
of the alley, wondering what people nearby were noticing. Only a moment had
passed, but the steam was thickening and Kyo's skin was gleaming wetly through
it. His whole body was stiff with fear and anger, the hand over his eyes
clenching with the overwhelming emotion.

She reached Kyo and touched his naked wrist as they entered the alley.
"Kyo-kun." She pulled his arm down, standing between him and the street. The
Cat smell was getting stronger, but she was prepared for it. His eyes were
changing as he stared at her, widening and darkening while the pupils slitted.
"Close your eyes," she whispered, sliding her hand behind his head and stepping
close to him. He stood rigid against her for a long instant, before letting his
head fall onto her shoulder and his body press into hers. One arm went around
him, the other cradling his skull as the bones moved with the transformation.

They clung together, willing the triggered curse to change direction and turn
Kyo into his more innocuous cat form. Everything stopped long enough for him to
take one labored breath, his quiet moan tinged with the otherworldly echo of the
Cat's voice. Then his weight abruptly lightened against Tohru, her arms
spasming closed on a small, furred body. She almost sobbed in relief at the
sensation of small, ordinary claws piercing her skin in the moment before Kyo
retracted them.

"It worked," she said, looking down at him. He was trembling violently, pupils
huge with panic.

"Bracelet," he managed. "I need it." His tail lashed her hips.

"I know." Tohru held him tightly against her. "We'll find it. We will. It's
only been a couple of minutes." Pausing only a moment to try to look calm, she
threw his clothes into one of the bags she'd brought for groceries, then walked
back out of the alley, not looking at anyone. "Is anyone staring at us?" she
asked quietly. Kyo lifted his head and peered about.

"Yeah, a couple. But they look confused, not freaked out." He tried to breathe
normally instead of in short, panicked gasps. He noticed that Hatori's car was
gone. "I think I threw it over by that vendor."

Tohru went in the direction he indicated, both of them searching the ground for
the polished gleam of his beads. An unfamiliar voice interrupted them. "That
cat doesn't look like it wants to be held." They both looked toward its source
in surprise, and found a boy watching them. He was about their age or younger,
dressed in ripped jeans and leather, and to Kyo's jaded eye he had the look of a
bored delinquent.

As usual, Tohru was oblivious to the possibility of trouble. "It's fine. Um,
have you seen a beaded bracelet?"

The stranger grinned at her. "The one that guy you were with threw away?"

She blinked, then smiled back. "I'm trying to find it for him. He was in a
hurry."

He shrugged. "Didn't look to me like he wanted it anymore."

Kyo's tension began to seep into her. "Have you seen it?"

"Yeah." He dug into his pocket and pulled the beads out, rolling them between
his fingers. "Looks old. Is it?"

"I don't know. May I have it?"

He continued to grin. "I dunno. What's it worth?"

"Worth?" Tohru was becoming alarmed, and Kyo didn't dare speak, although his
ears pressed flat to his head. "I--I don't know."

"Well, what'll you give me for it, girl?" She opened her mouth to say that she
didn't have much money, but there was no chance to speak.

"She won't give you anything for it," said yet another voice, this time one she
knew. "It's a family heirloom, and it's not worth anything to anyone else.
Hand it over." Relief washed over her as she turned and found Hatsuharu
standing a few feet away.

"Ha--"

"Hang on, Honda-san." He stepped closer to the boy and held out his hand.
"Give it to me."

"Why should I? Who the hell are you?"

Haru smiled slowly. "Are you new around here?" He ran his hand through his
hair deliberately, drawing the boy's eye to the mixed white and black. "Don't
know who I am?"

"No idea. Think you're tough, huh?" The boy laughed and turned his head to
call down the street to a friend. "Hey, Gonshiro, d'you know this punk?" He
turned back and found Haru's arm landing across his throat and pinning him to
the wall, as his friend came running.

"Shit!" the second stranger yelled as he ran. "Don't piss him off!"

"I'm Sohma Hatsuharu," Haru said pleasantly, adding enough pressure to choke his
victim slightly. "You've got Sohma family property. Give it back." He glanced
at the new arrival, amused. "And he hasn't made me that angry yet." He let go
and stepped back, holding out his hand again.

Tohru stared back and forth as the two boys exchanged frightened glances. The
first slowly handed the beads over. "Um . . . Sohma-san . . . is that girl
related to you?" the second asked.

"Friend of the family. Don't mess with her," Haru said calmly, pocketing Kyo's
bracelet. "Now run away, children."

They didn't quite run, but they didn't linger, either. Tohru stared after them,
still holding Kyo tightly. As soon as they were out of earshot, Haru calmly
took her arm and led them down the street, away from where they could be
overheard. "'lo, Kyo, Honda-san."

"What're you doing here?" Kyo muttered, trying not to attract attention.

Haru sighed. "Tori-nii told me he was taking Akito to look for you, and to get
myself here in case you needed help once they were gone."

Tohru eyed him a bit nervously. "Hatsuharu-san, are you Black or--"

"No, that kid cooperated too fast to get me really mad." He shrugged. "I
haven't been on the street much the last couple of years; guess my reputation's
faded a bit. So what'd I miss?" Tohru filled him in; Kyo was busy eyeing
Haru's pocket nervously. "So what happens when you transform again?" Haru
asked.

"I don't know," Kyo replied. "The two changes work differently." He growled
softly. "I should probably be somewhere private, in case."

"What d'you mean, 'differently'?" Haru asked. At the look Kyo shot him, he
lifted his shoulders slightly in a no-offense gesture. "I've never seen your
other form, remember."

"I'd rather keep it that way."

"Ok. Just so you know, though, I don't really care what it looks like. Who
_has_ seen it, anyway?" He started walking in the direction of Shigure's house,
motioning for Tohru to follow.

"But--the groceries--"

"We can order in," Kyo said. He stretched so he was leaning on Tohru's
shoulder, more at eye level with them. "Um. My parents. Akito. Kagura.
Tohru. Shishou." His tail lashed a little. "Some others."

They had reached a wooded area that marked an edge of the Sohma property, and
Haru glanced off the road. "How about here? Honda-san and I can make sure no
one comes close."

"Ok." They headed down the embankment into the trees, walked several minutes
after they could no longer see the road behind them. Haru touched Tohru's
shoulder lightly.

"Hold still and be quiet, ok?" He stepped away from her, closed his eyes, and
inhaled slowly. From her shoulder, Kyo did the same, nose twitching and ears
swiveling as they sifted through the scents and sounds of the woods for any sign
of other people. After a moment, Haru spoke again. "I don't think there's
anyone around. You?"

"Nothing. Here should be fine." Haru dug the bracelet out of his pocket and
set it on the ground; Tohru produced Kyo's clothes from the bag. Kyo hesitated
a moment, then leaped down from her arms. "Don't look, ok?" he said, glancing
at them both.

Haru's brow creased in puzzlement. "If Honda-san's already seen--"

"That doesn't mean she has to look," Kyo retorted. His fur rippled with the
tingle of impending transformation. "Any minute now," he added. Tohru gave him
a small smile and turned, walked a few steps away. Kyo sighed. "I was in
between shapes, so I don't know what I'll be like."

"In between shapes?" Haru blinked. "How can you be--" The sound and smoke of
Kyo's cat form vanishing interrupted him, and he found himself speechless.
"Oh."

Kyo looked mostly human, but his eyes were too large and gleaming, his skin an
odd color, and there was something unnatural to the shape of his head. He
lifted his hands and grimaced, a vaguely horrific expression. "Guess I'm in
between." Under the discolored skin, his muscles began to move in impossible
ways, stretching and mutating. "You can stop looking now." His voice was
pained and somehow distorted.

"Um . . . right." Haru turned away obediently as the acrid smell of the Cat hit
him.

"Don't worry about it if you puke," Kyo said from behind him. "Everyone else
does."

"Wasn't planning on it," Haru replied, breathing through his mouth and trying to
ignore the violent spasm in his guts. He focused instead on the sounds, the low
gasp of real pain as Kyo changed. *The changes work differently.* "Does it
take long?" he asked, fervently grateful for the instantaneous nature of his own
curse.

"No, it's done." Kyo's voice, but not; it echoed almost metallically, as if he
was calling from far away. "And after a while, I revert, like the regular
Jyuunishi curse."

"Does it hurt?"

"Changing back? No. It's faster."

Haru's stomach was still roiling from the smell, but he kept talking. "You
really don't want me to look?"

"Why would you want to?"

"Because--" Why did he? "Because when the family talks about it, they make it
sound . . . I want to know. I want to know why they insist we have to treat
you like we do."

There was a long, perfect silence. Then, "Fine. Don't blame me if you have
nightmares."

Before either of them could change their mind, Haru turned to look at the Cat.
He felt his eyes widen as he got his first look, but otherwise controlled his
reaction. Kyo's other form was larger than he'd expected, powerful almost-human
muscles under furless leathery skin, armed with claws and teeth that looked like
they could eviscerate him without any trouble at all. And the expression on the
alien face . . . still readable. Frightened and resigned, not particularly
dangerous, although Haru could imagine the damage Kyo's temper could cause in
that body. He exhaled slowly. "Not all that catlike, I guess."

"Not really." And again, almost Kyo's voice. Still recognizably him. Haru
nodded a little.

"Thanks for showing me, Kyo." He managed a small smile.

"You're not freaking out," Kyo said quietly.

"Nope. I figured what I'd imagined was worse than it really is, and I was
right." He sat down on the ground to wait for the change to reverse itself.

"It usually lasts longer than the other transformation." A pause. "You guys
can leave if you want. I'll be fine here."

"How long is 'longer'?"

Kyo hesitated. "Maybe an hour or two."

"I see." Haru stretched thoughtfully. "Honda-san, how about you head back to
Sensei's place and I'll keep Kyo company?"

"Huh?" Tohru almost turned to look at them when he addressed her, but caught
herself at the sound Kyo made. "But I--"

"What do you think, Kyo?"

"You don't have to," Kyo began, but Haru shrugged and cut him off.

"I don't mind." They stared at each other for a moment, then Kyo sighed.

"Sure. That'd be fine."

"That's settled, then. We'll see you in a while, Honda-san."

"Ah . . . ok." She sounded dubious, but started up the hill, hesitating at the
top as if waiting for them to call her back.

"We'll be _fine_," Haru said. "Don't worry."

"Ok," she repeated, and disappeared from sight.

********

Tohru considered heading back into the shopping district and picking up at least
a few groceries before returning home, but decided against it. If she couldn't
stay with Kyo, she wanted to get back and check on Yuki. She walked quickly,
but the journey still seemed to take too long. When she arrived, she was
dismayed to see Hatori's car parked in front of the house. Only the sight of
Yuki getting up from the front step, where he'd been waiting, kept her from
panicking. His gaze flicked beyond her, confused.

"Where's the cat?"

She ignored the question for a moment. "Yuki-kun, is Akito-san here?"

He blinked at her. "No, just Hatori and my brother. They just got here a
little while ago. Why would Akito be here?"

"Did Hatori-san say anything?"

"No, he said he had to talk to all of us and would wait until you and Kyo came
back."

"Kyo-kun's in the woods with Hatsuharu-san."

"Haru? Where'd you run into him?"

The door opened behind him, and the three eldest Jyuunishi stepped out. "I sent
Hatsuharu to meet up with Kyo and Honda-kun," Hatori said. "What's their
situation?"

Yuki spoke up before she could answer. "Why did you send him, Hatori? What did
Akito do?"

The doctor grimaced. "Akito had me take him to find Honda-kun and Kyo, and
ordered Kyo to remove his bracelet and throw it away. Kyo obeyed, and we left;
after dropping Akito off at home I collected Ayame and came here. What happened
after that, Honda-kun?"

Tohru straightened up to stand as tall as she could. "I hugged him, and he
changed into a cat before the other transformation finished. We don't think
anyone noticed. And then we looked for the bracelet, only a boy had picked it
up and didn't want to give it back."

"And then?"

"Hatsuharu-san came and got it back, and we went into the woods so Kyo-kun could
change back, only then he was still changing into his tr--" she stumbled over
the words, but finished "his true form. So Hatsuharu-san told me to come home,
and stayed with him. And we didn't get the groceries, but Kyo-kun said we could
order boxed suppers."

"Ah, such nostalgia today," Shigure murmured.

Tohru looked back and forth between the three men, noticing that Ayame looked
unusually serious. He noticed her scrutiny and waved acknowledgement at her
without saying anything. Even to Tohru, that smacked of trouble. Yuki touched
her hand lightly before she could comment. "Honda-san, do you want to come
outside with me?"

"If there aren't any other chores that I need to do." She pondered for a moment
but didn't come up with anything urgent.

"See you two in a while, then," Shigure said, and went back into the house with
Hatori and Ayame. Tohru and Yuki headed behind the house and into the trees
without further comment, to the area that Yuki had painstakingly cleared and
planted years before.

"Is there any work that needs to be done?" she asked, peering at it.

"Not much. I should start planting soon, but not quite yet; mostly we should
get rid of any overgrowth left from the autumn." They went to work, dividing
the labor with the ease of long familiarity, and it didn't seem long at all
before they were brushing the dirt off their hands and unable to find anything
else that needed doing.

Tohru watched Yuki surreptitiously as they worked, and then as they sat down
under one of the trees. He was paler than usual, and kept shooting glances back
toward the house. "Yuki-kun, do you want to talk?"

He shook his head slowly. "Not really, but . . . I'm worried about what
Akito's up to. We should have expected him to go after Kyo after he interfered
yesterday, but I was worrying too much about having to go back to the Main
House." At her puzzled look, he shrugged. "Akito wants all of the Jyuunishi to
start living there again. Living here has always been just a temporary
reprieve, but I've always tried not to think about when he'll call us back. I
guess yesterday was his way of telling me it was time. You'll probably be fine;
Shigure will keep Akito from turning you out of this house."

"I wouldn't want to live here alone," she said quietly. "Uo-chan's been talking
about getting a place, so I can probably live with her if you all leave." She
felt tears welling up as she spoke, and then Yuki took her hand and squeezed it.

"We don't know for sure yet." They sat together in silence after that, the
chill from the ground seeping up into their bodies, but not wanting to return to
the house. Eventually Yuki looked up, turning his head as if hearing something
in the quiet. "Kyo's back. The rats by the house just got nervous." He stood
and helped Tohru to her feet, and they made their way back.

*********

It was crowded around the table, with six Sohmas and Tohru sitting and drinking
their tea and each waiting for someone else to start the real conversation. Kyo
looked little the worse for wear, although he was plainly on edge, his fingers
coming back to his bracelet again and again to reassure himself that it was
there. Finally Hatori sighed and took the initiative. "Ayame went to talk to
Akito this morning, before any of today's other incidents occurred. He asked me
to bring him here to tell you what happened."

Ayame took another slow sip of tea before responding to the expectant eyes that
trained on him. When he finally spoke, it was with none of his usual
over-the-top flare. "Tori-san told me what happened yesterday, and I decided to
ask Akito-san to wait a while longer before having Yuki and Gure-san and the
others move back to the Main House."

Yuki stared openly. "You--"

"Akito-san has agreed to wait until you have finished university, provided you
continue your studies immediately after graduation and maintain good grades." A
hesitation so slight it almost passed unnoticed. "You are also to visit him and
report on your progress regularly."

"But how did you--"

Ayame met Yuki's eyes directly, an inscrutable shadow lurking in his own. "I
don't ask him for favors often, little brother. I told him that it was my
respectful opinion, as your brother, that you would do better in your studies if
you remained at Gure-san's house until you've finished growing up."

"Akito said he'd exhausted his kindness for the day," Kyo muttered. Yuki had
buried his face in his hands, trembling with relief.

"When we were in the car, Akito said he'd make arrangements for Yuki and Kyo to
write their final exams at home," Hatori said. "I'll be seeing to that
tomorrow. Honda-kun, if you'd like, I can ask the school to extend the option
to you as well. You may want to be at home as much as possible over the next
few days."

"Oh?"

He looked from her to Kyo, and hesitated. There was a faint scratching sound as
Kyo's nails dug into the table. "Kyo, Akito says you have one week left. He
says the exams should be over by then, and he's going to begin calling the
family in for the ceremony."

"There's a ceremony?" Kyo's voice was faint and strangled.

"There's a ritual for everything, Kyo-kun," Shigure said mildly.

"Great."

Tohru put her hand on his arm. "Kyo-kun . . . "

"It's fine," he whispered. "I knew this would happen. I just wasn't ready to
hear it."

"It's _not_ fine!" She, Haru, and Yuki spoke in perfect unison, then stared
helplessly at each other. Kyo shook her hand off and stood.

"I need to be by myself for a while. I'll be on the roof." Without looking at
any of them, he left the room; the front door slid open and shut, and a moment
later there was a soft thump overhead.

"Well," Shigure said after a moment. "It _is_ nice that we don't have to move
again yet. Much appreciated, Aya."

"Mm." Yuki nodded. "Thank you very much, brother." Looking at him, Ayame
smiled for the first time.

"You're welcome."

Shigure stood and stretched, casting a glance up at the ceiling. "I guess I'd
better see about getting the door frame fixed."

"Could Kyo-kun just go somewhere else?" Tohru asked in a small voice. "What if
he ran somewhere where Akito-san couldn't find him?"

"Not possible," Hatori replied. "The family has enough power to track him down
almost anywhere, and it would be done if it became necessary. However, the
curse binds him as tightly as the rest of us. Maybe even more so. It infects
our blood and exerts rather a lot of control."

"Like DNA?"

Hatori grimaced. "I can't give you a scientific explanation, Honda-kun. What
has us is magical, and I can't describe it any other way. In some ways it may
be a deeper part of us than our genes are. It influences absolutely everything
about us." He took a sip of cold tea. "Akito is the core of it; we can't get
too far away from him, either physically or mentally. If Kyo ran, he would
simply be pulled back."

"So there's nothing we can do," she said quietly.

"Nothing," Hatori confirmed.

"Will I be able to visit him?"

"No. Contact with the Cat isn't encouraged," Shigure said. "His physical needs
will be seen to, but beyond that he is left alone."

Tohru whimpered softly, closing her eyes for a long moment. As a tear crept
free she jerked her head back and stared up into the light. "Honda-san?" Yuki
said, worried. She continued to look up, breathing slowly.

"He told me not to cry," she answered, wiping the tear off her face. When no
others appeared, she turned to look at Yuki and took his hand. "I don't want
this to happen to him."

He squeezed her hand in response. "I know, Honda-san. And so does he."

********

The rest of that first day passed slowly. Ayame and Hatori returned to the Main
House, but Haru stayed to keep Tohru and Yuki company while they waited for Kyo
to come back down. His calm steadiness went a long way toward keeping Tohru
composed, although none of them talked much. Yuki was trying to pull himself
back together for her, but the emotional storms of the last days had taken a
high toll on him. The two boys kept her company while she went about her
chores, trying to keep busy.

Kyo reappeared shortly after supper was delivered and ate with them, but wasn't
ready to talk. When the meal was finished, he took Tohru aside for a moment;
the others didn't hear what he said to her, but she nodded and gave him a
tremulous smile before he went outside and returned to the roof.

"Is he going to sleep up there?" Haru asked dubiously.

Tohru shook her head. "No, he says he'll go to bed when the cold starts getting
to him." The three of them cleaned up, a quick task after takeout, and made
themselves comfortable around the kotatsu in the living room. Once again,
Shigure retired to his study, leaving them alone. Haru threw an arm lightly
around Yuki's shoulders, not quite hugging him, but giving him something to lean
against. Yuki in turn took Tohru's hand again, holding it tightly. There
didn't seem to be anything to talk about, so they sat in silence and watched the
last sunlight make its way across the floor and dissolve through colors into
darkness. After a while, Yuki lifted his head.

"I just heard the upstairs window, Honda-san. He's inside."

"That's good," she replied, her words slightly blurred with exhaustion.

"Maybe you should go to bed. I guess we should start studying tomorrow."

"What about you?"

He shook his head, his eyes gleaming in the dimness. "I don't think I can sleep
yet. That doesn't mean you shouldn't."

"I'll stay up with him," Haru added.

She hesitated, but then stood slowly, letting go of his hand last. "Good night,
then, Yuki-kun, Hatsuharu-san."

"Good night." They listened while she climbed the stairs, heard the soft sound
of her door sliding closed.

"You don't have to stay if you don't want to, Haru," Yuki said quietly.

"I don't mind. I know you'd rather have her, but--"

"She'll need all her energy for Kyo for the next while."

Haru shook his head, bemused. "There're some things I never thought I'd hear
you say." Yuki shrugged, leaning against him wearily. Haru was careful not to
react, not wanting to startle Yuki out of his unusually tactile state. Drowsing
a bit from the warmth of the kotatsu, they sat like that long into the night.

********

Studying was almost a blessing. The next day, shortly after breakfast and
Haru's departure for school, Hatori arrived with permission for the three of
them to stay home and write their exams without returning to class. He also had
several bags of groceries, which distracted Tohru from her depression for
several minutes as she examined and put away the food.

"Honda-kun, I should tell you that Akito does not know that your friends know
about the curse."

"Hmm?" she said, rummaging. "I thought you'd have to tell him?"

"Ordinarily I would, but frankly, my impression is that Hanajima-san would make
it very difficult to deal with the situation in the usual way. Given that, I
decided not to mention it to Akito."

"I see." She emptied another bag of food to examine the contents. "Hatori-san,
how did you know what we needed?"

"When I asked Shigure, he went on about how the cupboard was completely bare and
not wanting to send you out after food," he replied, shooting a glance at
Shigure, who affected innocence with the ease of long practice. "And also--"

"You will stay for lunch, won't you?"

"--you cook for me often enough that I have some idea of what you use." They
were in the kitchen, Hatori watching with some amusement as Tohru busied
herself.

"Ah, milk for Kyo-kun." It took long familiarity for him to detect the catch in
her voice as she said Kyo's name. "Rice, dried fish, miso, tea . . . "

But the domestic rituals could only distract her for so long, and it was almost
with relief that she settled down to study with Yuki and Kyo. All three of them
attacked the books diligently, pausing for Yuki to explain things in more
detail, breaking only for meals; when one of them was distracted by thoughts of
what would happen when the exams were over, the other two waited without comment
until they snapped back to the present.

********

Four days passed with little discussion of anything but schoolwork, until Yuki
deemed Tohru ready to write the exams. "Do you feel prepared, Honda-san?" He
carefully kept his eyes averted from the way her hand stayed in Kyo's, as it had
almost every moment when they weren't writing. He wondered if she was even
aware of it.

"I think so." She nodded decisively. "You've helped me so much!"

"My pleasure. Kyo, are you ready?"

"Yeah."

Yuki sighed. "I guess we should call Hatori and tell him we can write tomorrow,
then." The doctor had been faithfully calling them every evening to inquire
about their progress. Kyo and Tohru nodded reluctant agreement. "I'll do it."
He stood up and went into the hallway to make the call.

"All right," Hatori said when he answered the phone. "Tomorrow's Wednesday, and
a substitute teacher will go out to the house tomorrow to supervise you."

"Ok."

"Also, tell Kyo that Akito has set the ceremony for Friday night, at sundown."

Yuki hesitated for a moment, but there was only one possible response. "I will,
Hatori." He slowly hung up the phone, which suddenly felt heavy in his hand,
and returned to the living room. Finding that Kyo had stretched out on the
floor with his head resting in Tohru's lap, he managed not to make any sound
that might reflect the stab of pain he felt. Instead he went and sat on Tohru's
other side as if his cousin hadn't moved, trying to ignore her fingers twined in
Kyo's hair, and the way her head was bowed. "Kyo," he said quietly.

"When, rat?" Kyo responded, his words half-muted against Tohru's thigh.

"Friday, at sunset." There was no ignoring the shudder that run through Kyo's
body and into Tohru's, the quiet sound of despair that she was unable to
suppress. Kyo flinched from it.

"Don't," he whispered.

"I'm not crying," she replied, and her voice was almost steady. Yuki touched
her hair.

"I'm sorry," he said quietly, and stood again. Tohru's free hand came up to his
for a moment, a light pressure of her fingers, and then he left the room. The
door slid closed on his last glimpse of them, Tohru curled protectively around
his cousin, not quite holding him. Not crying.

********

Wednesday passed in a haze of equations and frantically emptying their minds
onto an endless stream of blank pages, under the bored gaze of a strange teacher
whose only show of interest in them came when she asked why they weren't writing
exams with the rest of their class. They shrugged awkwardly and smiled, and she
let the matter drop, reading a book for the hours before she was able to collect
their papers and leave.

Tohru rubbed her eyes wearily. "I should call Uo-chan and Hana-chan and let
them know we're done. They're probably worried."

"Yeah." Kyo focused somewhere over her shoulder. "Maybe you could see what
they're doing after school tomorrow."

"Um?"

"I guess I should probably say goodbye to them. I'm gonna be at the dojo with
Shishou during the day, but I should be free by then."

Tohru blinked and smiled a little. "Ok, I'll ask them." She wandered off to
the phone, and the boys looked at each other.

"How did you do?" Yuki asked.

"Fine, I guess. You?"

"Fine."

"No surprise. Are you coming if we go see her friends?"

Yuki hesitated. "I don't think so. Thanks, though."

Tohru leaned into the room from the hallway. "Kyo-kun, how's tea at three?"

"That's fine." He gestured to stop her from returning to the phone. "I'm going
up on the roof, ok? Come up if you want."

"All right."

Kyo nodded brusquely to Yuki and headed outside, grabbing his coat as he yanked
his shoes on. The shock of the air when he stepped out felt good against skin
that had been indoors for too long. *Better appreciate it while I can.* He
walked around the house to the point where the roof hung lowest, gathered
himself, and sprang straight up, catching the overhang with his hands and
landing easily in a crouch. He almost smiled, a martial artist's quiet pride in
a well-trained body, but found himself cringing as he looked down to the ground.
It was no human leap that he had made, and the pride was buried under the wave
of despair that accompanied the reminder of his true nature. *Damn it.* He sat
down and stared at his fingers, flexing them into harmless claws.

He was still gazing at them when the sound of the ladder moving told him that
Tohru was coming up. He turned to look at her when she sat beside him, and for
an instant her face blurred into his memory of claws gashing into her shoulder,
and the sudden scent of blood. She blinked under the intensity of his gaze.
"Kyo-kun?" His hands moved to her coat and unfastened it, tugging it off; she
shivered, uncertain but trusting as he pushed her sleeve up to bare her arm,
then her shoulder. He stared down at the parallel scars that still marked her
skin, traced them with his fingers.

*Get away from me or I'll rip your face into a thousand pieces!* The threat
echoed in his mind as if he'd only just screamed it, but Tohru's calm regard as
his hand tightened on her shoulder kept him from recoiling. She silently
brought her own hand up to cover his. "I'm sorry," he said softly, but couldn't
think of what else to say. Behind them, the sun was going down. Forty eight
hours left, and the words refused to come.

"It's all right," Tohru said, leaning to rest her head on his shoulder, still
shivering but making no move to pull her coat back on.

They sat together until the stars came out, until Tohru sighed and straightened
up. "I should start supper."

"I'll help." As she walked to the ladder Kyo peered over the edge of the roof,
at the leap he could make effortlessly; he turned away and followed her down,
rung by rung.

********

Kyo spent most of Thursday's daylight hours at the dojo where he'd lived for so
much of his life. Kazuma had offered to cancel his classes for the day but Kyo
refused, preferring to watch his adopted father working with his young students.
None of the private rooms held as much sentimental appeal to him as the wide
open space where classes were held; Kyo sat with his back to the wall, breathing
in the familiar smells of polished hardwood and the sweat that flowed from
healthy young bodies pushed precisely as hard as they could endure. After the
first few classes were over, Kazuma came to crouch beside him.

"Want to make yourself useful?"

"What do you need done?"

"Want to help with the next class? I have a couple of older students who could
use a good opponent while I observe them."

Kyo surprised himself by grinning. "Sure. I only have what I'm wearing,
though."

Kazuma shrugged. "Take your shirt off and I won't call you on inappropriate
attire this time."

*This time. The last time.* Kyo straightened up against the pain and saw it
reflected in Kazuma's eyes. "Ok." He stripped to the waist and stood,
stretching slowly as they walked to the center of the room. Students were
already starting to file in; Kazuma murmured their names and skill levels to Kyo
so softly that he could probably barely hear himself, knowing that his adopted
son would hear him clearly. When there was a row of students in front of them,
clad identically in white, Kazuma stepped forward.

"This is Sohma Kyo," he said. "He'll be sparring with some of you this
afternoon." Kyo felt their eyes on him, taking in his casual pants, his bright
hair, his slight build. He saw two of the older students dismiss him, and
smiled to himself as Kazuma's quick glance told him they would be his opponents.
He rolled onto the balls of his feet, suddenly energized. He followed the
class through the first exercises, letting the familiar movements center him,
then watched as Kazuma demonstrated a new move. Finally he and one of the older
students were waved forward. Kazuma caught his eye. "Be gentle with him, son."

*Son.* The word warmed him as he and his opponent bowed to each other and began
to move. Kyo avoided the first few strikes easily, taking in the other's skill.
*Not bad. Cocky as hell. _Nothing_ on Yuki. Or Haru.* He smiled slightly,
letting the boy see it. *Or me.*

He barely broke a sweat winning that round, and then the next. After a third,
the class was almost over, and Kazuma gave detailed critiques to the students.
They eyed Kyo respectfully as they listened, and waited for Kazuma to dismiss
them; Kyo bowed, snagged his shirt, and went to the private bathing room to
rinse off.

Kazuma was waiting for him when he came out. "You're meeting your friends
soon?" Kyo glanced at the clock as he pulled his shirt on.

"Yeah, in half an hour."

Kazuma nodded slowly. The room was perfectly quiet except for the ticking of
the clock as they regarded each other. "I'll be at the ceremony tomorrow
night," he said finally. "But I likely won't have a chance to talk to you."

"I know."

Kazuma stepped forward and hugged him tightly; after only a startled heartbeat,
Kyo returned the embrace. "I'll miss you, Kyo. I want you to know that I have
never regretted taking you as my child."

Kyo took a step back to look up at him. "Not even now?"

"The joy of having had you with me is worth the pain of losing you now," Kazuma
replied. "You are my pride as a teacher, and as a father." He gripped Kyo's
hand tightly, and let go. "Don't be late."

The beginnings of tears were making Kyo's eyes sting, but he managed a smile.
"Ok." He looked Kazuma straight in the eye, and said, "Bye, Dad. Love you."
Kazuma returned the smile, and Kyo took a deep breath and turned away, walked
out of the room and through the front door and down the road. *Bye, Dad.*

********

He was a few minutes late meeting Tohru and her friends--his friends, he
supposed, as far as he had friends--and Arisa flashed him a teasing grin when he
came in. "Did you get lost, Kyon?"

"You're mixing me up with Haru," he shot back as he turned a chair around and
dropped into it. "I was helping my . . . my father with a class." He looked
around for a menu and found a cup of tea sitting in front of him. He blinked at
it, sniffed, and recognized it as one of his favorite kinds.

"Hana-chan ordered for you," Tohru said.

"Oh." He gave Saki a slightly uncomfortable glance; he had never quite gotten
used to her powers, or figured out the range of things she could do. He
supposed that now he never would. "Thanks, Hanajima."

"You're welcome."

Kyo took a sip of tea, realizing that both she and Arisa were watching him
curiously. "What?"

"We're waiting to find out whatever it is that's making Tohru unhappy," Arisa
said, suddenly serious. "She said you had to tell us."

"No friendly casual talk first, huh?"

"No," Saki replied.

He swallowed some more tea. "Ok. I'm leaving tomorrow."

They stared at him. "Leaving?" Arisa echoed. "When are you coming back?"

"I'm not."

"You're not--" Her eyes flicked from him to Tohru and back, darkening with
anger. "You're just _leaving_ her?" Kyo watched her, feeling oddly detached.
In a moment she would be on her feet. He wondered if she'd hit him.

"Uo-chan!" Tohru, protesting her friend's anger, not sure how to defuse it.

Then Saki's hand was on Arisa's arm. "He doesn't want to go, Arisa," she said
quietly.

"Where are you going that you can't come back?" Arisa demanded.

"Away," Kyo said. "Just away."

"WHY?"

"Because the Head of our family will order me to." He felt his muscles tensing,
undoing the physical relaxation he'd acquired at the dojo. "Because I'm the
Cat. It's family business."

"Because of the other day, at school?" Arisa asked, somewhat calmer.

"No." He shook his head. "I can't really talk about it. I'm just . . .
leaving, that's all. I wanted to say goodbye to you two." His tea was almost
gone, and he realized he didn't have anything else to say to them. "That's all,
I guess. I should head back home."

"Wait," Saki said. "I have a favor to ask."

"Um?"

Inscrutable dark eyes examined him. "I would like to read you."

"Don't you usually?" he asked, surprised. "I thought you just . . . read people
when you're around them."

"Not deeply," she replied, with a tiny shrug and a sip of her tea. "It makes
them uncomfortable. And I don't have much interest in most people."

He hesitated, unnerved by the request. "What have you got to lose, Kyon?" Arisa
asked, not quite challenging. "If you're leaving anyway."

"Has she ever done it to _you_?" he grumbled.

She shook her head. "Nope. But I haven't been inspiring her curiosity for
years, either."

Kyo glanced at his watch. Barely more than twenty four hours left to make his
own choices. He grimaced and threw caution to the wind. "Sure. Why not."

A very faint smile creased Saki's lips. "Thank you. It won't take long." She
reached across the table and rested her fingers lightly on his left wrist. They
brushed his beads, and her eyes widened. "If I had more time . . !" she
whispered, staring at them, then shook her head and moved her touch to his other
wrist. She caught his eyes with hers, and then the bottom fell out of his mind.

Fragments of his life bloomed into full dominance in his thoughts, sharp-edged
and vivid, but he had the vague sense that Saki wasn't seeing them, only making
him recall them. Incoherent tangle of emotion surrounding his parents--the
steady, calm place that Kazuma became for him--the desperate, aching loneliness
that had dominated him for so long. He could almost feel her touching the
threads that connected him to Akito, rooted deep in his mind where he couldn't
fight them; then the lighter connection to the Jyuunishi, something he'd never
paid attention to before she made him look; finally the force of his feelings
about Tohru, a perfect mix of hope and despair. This Saki lingered on the
longest, as if it were the only thing she felt entitled to examine closely.

Kyo came back to himself suddenly as Saki withdrew her hand. "I see," she said
simply, without disapproval.

He found his voice. "Hanajima--if you can see things like that--can you affect
them?"

"Sometimes," she said, picking up her tea and setting it down again untouched
when she realized it was completely cold. "I wouldn't do what you would want,
though."

"Wouldn't? But you could?"

"Picking those cords apart would unravel you," she explained. "I've never seen
connections that deep. Most bonds are added to a person; you almost seem to
have been added to yours instead." She took in Tohru and Arisa's blank looks,
and shook her head. "I think you and Tohru-kun should go home. Thank you for
granting my favor."

"Ah . . . you're welcome, Hanajima."

She bowed slightly. "Goodbye. Arisa and I will take care of the bill."

Kyo and Arisa stood up at the same time. "I don't get it," Arisa said flatly.
"But it was fun having you around, Orange-head." She reached across the table
and gripped his arm firmly; he reciprocated.

"You too, Yankee." He had the distinct impression that she would have hauled
him into a rough hug if she'd been able to, and found he was able to grin at her
before glancing pointedly at Tohru. "Take care of her, you two. I'm counting
on you." When they nodded, he offered Tohru his hand and tugged her to her
feet. "Let's get going."

The walk home took a long time. He was highly aware of Tohru's small, warm
hand, her fingers tightening around his as they walked. From
time to time one of them would start to say something and then trail off again,
at a loss for words.

That short journey set the tone for the last evening. After supper, Shigure
said something about meeting a deadline--an excuse if ever Kyo had heard
one--and vanished into his study yet again. Yuki made no attempt to be subtle
about leaving them alone; he simply told them that he was going to spend the
night reading in his room. He didn't say good night to Tohru, only touched her
face, but he turned to Kyo before going upstairs and said, with only a little
hesitation, "Good night, stupid cat." His tone wasn't affectionate, but there
was no animosity, and the return to their ritual was oddly comforting. Kyo
responded in kind.

"Night, filthy rat."

When Yuki was gone, Kyo and Tohru settled by the kotatsu. "I hope it gets
warmer soon," she said as she tucked the quilt around her legs. "I hope
Yuki-kun and Shigure-san don't get cold."

"They'll be fine," Kyo told her. "There're blankets everywhere in this house,
remember."

"Mm." She shifted to make herself comfortable. "I'm tired."

"Want me to get you a pillow?" It was all too easy to fall asleep around the
kotatsu, although Kyo wasn't particularly sleepy.

"No," she said, reaching to tangle her fingers in his, and carefully resting her
head on his shoulder. "I'm ok." He brought his other hand up to stroke her
hair, hoping she wouldn't move; she lay still while he touched her face,
tentatively tracing its outlines, and he heard her breathing gradually deepen as
the warmth and the stress caught up with her. "Kyo-kun," she murmured after a
while.

"Hmm?"

"Just saying your name for no reason." She was almost asleep, the feel of her
curled against him giving him a sense of peacefulness he wouldn't have thought
possible.

"Go to sleep, Tohru," he said softly.

"Mm . . . 'k." She went completely slack, burrowing a bit closer. Kyo found
himself wondering if it was too much to wish for to fall asleep with her, and
never wake up to face the morning. But sleep showed no sign of coming to claim
him, so he sat still and savored what would probably be his last time alone with
her.

The only distraction came when Shigure tentatively opened the door and spoke
with him quietly on his way to his own bed. "How's the deadline?" Kyo asked as
his cousin left, careful not to wake Tohru.

"Deadline?" Shigure said, looking puzzled. "Ah--right. It's fine." The door
slid closed behind him, leaving Kyo alone with Tohru and the night.

********

Fruits Basket is the creation of Takaya Natsuki, and is licensed in North
America by FUNimation (anime) and Tokyopop (manga). Used without permission or
the intention of making a profit. Please support the original work!

"The Ceremony of Innocence" © 2004 by Ysabet MacFarlane (ba087@chebucto.ns.ca).
Edited by Alishya Lane.

Comments and criticism welcomed at the above address.

Full author's notes available at (http://bounce.to/ysabet)

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Notifying the author of any such use is an appreciated courtesy. NO CHANGES OF
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