Fullmetal Alchemist Fan Fiction ❯ The Adventures of Roy Mustang: Sex Ed Teacher ❯ Part Three ( Chapter 3 )

[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]

The open air market in Tazanga was a maze of sights and sounds, voices and smells and color and texture. It was also a crush of people, and Al vainly tried to keep his brother in view. Good thing Ed has a fondness for his bright red coat.

“What is it we’re looking for again?” Al called over the din, hoping to get Ed’s attention.

Ed stopped and turned back on Al’s direction.

“I don’t know,” Al’s elder brother shouted, “I guess I’ll know when I see it!” And Ed turned back to the stall in front of him, only to get swept up in a mini riptide of people moving the other way. Al made an exasperated sound and dove into the lot, clearing the way easily. No one wanted to get poked by a spike, and tall equaled intimidating in most people's book.

Ed was sputtering indignantly when Al reached into the crowd and plucked him out. He stood momentarily holding his brother aloft as people rippled around him like running water moving around a stone mid-stream.

Ed hung gracelessly in his hands like a dead fish and snorted.

The mission was complete. It was an uninteresting side venture to investigate some uninteresting claims about uninteresting merchants with uninteresting unsavory habits. Ed had complained bitterly the entire trip. The bastard Colonel was squandering their talents! The bastard Colonel was impeding their progress in returning their bodies to normal! The bastard Colonel was a bastard! Just in case Al missed that particular point.

Whenever Al tried to set Ed on his feet another stampede of pedestrians appeared. Ed, deciding he’d had enough of dangling in Al’s hands had started to squirm.

“Put me down!” Ed snapped, kicking his legs a bit.

“Where?” Al questioned, “I’ll just lose you again!”

Ed’s flailing became more pronounced.

“Calm down!” Al said and suddenly hoisted Ed up and brought him down on his shoulder.

“WATCH THE FRIGGIN’ SPIKE!” Ed shrieked.

“Quit all the damn wiggling and it will be fine!” Al retorted.

“I’m not wiggling, you’re trying to unman me!” Ed howled.

Al shrugged and gave Ed a toss.

Ed yelped and managed to land on his feet and turned to glare at his younger brother.

“Oh look,” Al said, “You do have cat like reflexes.”

Ed shook his fist, then widened his eyes at another surge in the street populace and scurried out of the way.

Later as they both idled at the carriage stop, (But not too close to each other, the whole spike incident still had Ed’s hackles up) Al made an observation.

“That was a lot of trouble for a fancy pen,” he said, “And for the Colonel who gets pens for free. Plus we could have gotten a fancy pen in East City.”

“It’s got flames on it,” Ed tossed off and shrugged.

“Why are you buying presents for the Colonel anyways? If you really wanted to give him something you could have just alchemized him something,” Al said. “That’s what you do for me.”

Ed rolled his head on his shoulders.

“Eh, but you’re my brother, that’s different,” he supplied.

“Oh really?” Al pondered, rocking on the balls of his feet and making his armor sound like a tin shutter flapping in a high wind, “I see, just your brother. So what does that make the Colonel?”

Ed twitched. He leaned forward and looked down the road.

“Stop rocking,” he said to Al, “It’s really annoying.”

Al stopped rocking but rolled his helmet in a parody of Ed’s own shoulder rolling. It sounded like a creaky car door.

Ed chewed the inside of his cheek.

Al clasped his hands behind his back and studied the noon day clouds.

“It makes him a bastard who’s gonna get a pen with flames on it!” Ed snarled.

“Well,” Al said, “As long as we got that settled.”


Back in East City the Elric brothers learned in their four day absence, that Falman had inadvertently made a joke. They were so eager to hear the joke, they doggedly followed the man to the mess hall and sat in rapt attention as he had the special of the day, which was meatloaf and mashed potatoes, and even went so far as to ask to come home with him that evening just in case he told the joke again. Riza informed them that while she appreciated their attempts to support Falman in his quest to become less of a tight ass, they really should just think about going back to their own dorm room that night and getting some much needed sleep. Ed attempted to make eye contact with the Colonel who had mysteriously been absent when they first returned. He was back at his desk that evening, but the he was doggedly plowing through a stack of paper with the determination of a small terrier worrying a rag. It might or might not have had anything to do with the fact the First Lieutenant’s gun holster was unbuckled, but as discretion was the better part of valor, the boys made their goodnights and returned home.

“Why didn’t you give the Colonel the pen when we saw him in the office tonight,” Al asked after the lights were out.

“I didn’t think about it,” his elder brother’s voice replied from the other side of the room.

“But you were worrying it in your pocket the whole time we were in his office.” Al pointed out.

Al waited patiently, and when Ed finally made a fake snore, he let it go.

The next day, Al dragged Ed out of bed at around noon and hustled him into a shower. He then toweled Ed’s hair dry and shoved him back into the room proper. He wrestled the familiar black tank top over Ed’s head, held Ed’s boxers and then pants for Ed to step into, and threaded his belt through the loops and buckled it. He left Ed staring blankly at this boots while Al made breakfast, then he dragged Ed over to the breakfast table and repeatedly shoved toast in his face until Ed’s FOOD!GIMME reflex kicked in and he began to eat.

They were out the door and halfway down the walk before Al noticed that Ed had forgotten to put his boots on, and went back to retrieve them after propping Ed against the side of the building. When he got the boots on the older boy, he steered him toward the direction of the main building, hauled him up the steps to the administrative floor and down to the familiar double-doored office. When he managed to get Ed inside after smacking him once against the door frame, he looked around frantically until his glowing eyes lit on Havoc sitting at the large table near in the center of the room.

“Did you make coffee?” Al asked, sounding breathless even though it wasn’t possible.

Havoc nodded and waved his hand toward the small stand where the pot sat.

“I hate it when we run out,” Al said and dragged Ed over to empty the contents of the pot down his throat.


Ed was there, sitting at the end of the table writing his report. To his right was Havoc, also writing something. It wasn’t a report, but whatever it was, Havoc had to write it. Across from Havoc sat Breda, looking about as alert as he usually did (which wasn’t very), and Falman, who was sitting ramrod straight at the very end of the table like a matronly woman watching over a group of errant school children.

Ed was less than five feet away and Roy couldn’t kiss him.

Roy snorted and dropped his gaze back to the work on his desk. Well it was best just to not look at him then. Not looking at Ed meant that he could put out of his mind not kissing Ed. Only when the kissing thought fled, the sex thoughts barged in and made themselves at home. Roy put his elbow up on the desk and his cheek in his palm and gritted is teeth.

Four encounters. Precisely four. Two weeks between the first and second, one day between the third and fourth. Then another mission that had lasted four days, and Roy was going to lose his freaking mind. Roy’s mind strayed inadvertently into the realm of not-safe-for-work thoughts with dazzling ease, replaying the last encounter in lust -embellished frustration-vision before his work dulled eyes. Ed had been the epitome of relaxed charm, flopping back onto the bed and spreading his legs and grinning up at him, wiggling his eyebrows and making kissy faces with his lips, and Roy had tossed all sane thought to the wind and climbed on. Once he’d made that small body buck and shudder and pant? He was resigned once again to the bathroom with some hand lotion that smelled like sugar cookies and a hand towel.

Another lesson was definitely in order. The sooner the better, for Edward Elric needed to learn that although it might not be better to give rather than receive, a sexually frustrated Colonel was no laughing matter.

He managed to get Ed alone when the lunch stampede ensued and gave the boy a smile.

“Coming over tonight?” Roy asked, resisting the urge to touch golden bangs.

“I don’t know,” Ed confided lowly, “I think Al’s getting suspicious.”

Al? Who was Al? OH, Al! Roy rubbed his chin.

“He won’t buy another library excuse,” Roy asked, hoping desperation wasn’t evident in his voice.

“I haven’t even read the books I checked out three weeks ago,” Ed said, “He’s not slow you know, I’m not even coming home with any notes.”

Roy straightened up and fixed Ed with a look.

“You have to work late,” Roy said seriously.

“Work late? But I just got back from a mission and I’ll finish my report after lunch!” Ed protested.

“I’m sorry FullMetal, there is nothing I can do about it, you’re just going to have to work late and that’s final.” Roy said with a sad shake of his head.

“Well damn,” Ed said, “I hope they have fried chicken on the menu for lunch.”

“You’ll need your strength,” Roy assured him, “So why don’t you go check on that now.”


Ed came running into the dorm room sometime after the work day had ended and grabbed the pen box and his long red coat.

“Working late Al! Don’t wait up, see you later, make it up to you, promise!” And he rushed back out the door.

“Yeah,” Al said to the door after his brother had fled, “Give him a kiss for me while you’re at it.” Al shook his head. All the books ever written about puberty and hormones in the world were never gonna explain this one. And Al was pretty sure by now he’d read them all.

Roy carefully schooled his expression before he answered the pounding on his door. After all it wouldn’t do to answer the door looking like a predator, no matter what he felt like at the moment. Ed came strolling in looking pleased with himself, shedding his red outer coat and waving it at the mirrored coat hook before dropping it on the floor. Roy picked it up and hung it on the hook before indulgently followed the grinning teen into the living room. Ed had fished something out of his pockets and had it in his hands behind his back.

“You are terrible at trying to be sneaky,” Roy said with a smirk.

Ed scowled then thrust a small narrow white box at him.

“Here,” he said, lifting his nose in the air.

Roy accepted the box, looked at it.

“Another house thing?” Roy asked.

Ed reached forward with one white gloved finger and gave the box in Roy’s hand a tap.

“Nope,” he said with a grin, “This one is a present.”

“A present?” Roy said, “For me?”

“No for the man who really lives here, yes for you, I mean….that is…you’re my boyfriend.” Ed finished out with a mumble.

Roy’s eyebrows tried to climb into his hair line and he wasn’t able to stop the smile that crawled across his face.

“I’m your boyfriend?” he asked the now blushing teenager, leaning forward just a bit.

Ed’s blush went truly crimson and his hands shot up to cover his face.

“Shut up!” he yelled muffled and Roy sincerely tried not to laugh.

If this managed to get anymore enchanting I think I’d curl up and die of sugar shock.

His boyfriend! He wants me to be his boyfriend! He’s wooing me with gifts! I’m being courted. He is trying in that Edward Elric way of his to take control of the situation. I want to fuck him on the carpet right here and now.

But no, tonight we’re going to do that in a bed.

“I stopped and got you pasta from Brio’s,” Roy said as he opened the box.

Ed uncovered his face.

“Meat sauce?” the boy asked.

Roy nodded lifting the heavy writing pen from the tissue paper. It was silver and had what looked like shooting flames licking up its side. Roy smiled.

“With meat sauce and bread,” Roy added.

“Great! I’m starved, let’s eat,” Ed started for the kitchen but Roy caught his arm. Ed looked up at him, then blinked and stretched up to meet Roy’s descending lips.

When Roy pulled back he said: “Thank you for the pen, it’s very nice. And Hawkeye thanks you for the pen, I’ll be able to sign my fingers to the bone.”

“Well you know how it is,” Ed said, leaning hopefully toward the kitchen, “Anything for the First Lieutenant.”

Roy laughed and draped his arm over Ed’s shoulders and let the boy lead him into the kitchen.

“I do know, “ Roy said, “ I do know, indeed.”

Roy retrieved a bowl from the ice box before following Ed down the hall toward the bedroom. The got entangled briefly right outside the bedroom door, and Roy almost fancied he saw a butt shaped indention in the wall after the flushed blonde had squirmed away and escaped to the bed. Roy waltzed in and set the bowl on the bedside table and took a few moments to watch Ed strip himself and throw himself in the middle of the bed. As Roy began to unbutton his shirt, Ed squirmed around in the sheets, threw his arms above his head and sighed. He swung his golden gaze to the older alchemist and watched him undress. Ed was really a fast learner and nothing enticed Roy to make a production of a thing than Edward’s eyes on him.

“Isn’t it funny,” Ed suddenly asked, “That we’re like this now?”

“Like what?” Roy questioned, bending to pull of his shoes.

“You know,” Ed scissored his legs a couple of times, “Like this, naked in a bed together, doing stuff.”

“Stuff,” Roy repeated unbuttoning his slacks.

“Yeah, stuff,” Ed challenged, “Like all that stuff you do with your hands and mouth, that stuff.”

“You’re so eloquent,” Roy shimmied out of his briefs, “Sometimes you make me breathless.”

“Shut up,” Ed said good-naturedly, and noticing the bowl. “What’s that?”

“That is incentive for you my darling pupil, tonight’s lesson is ‘We give as good as we get’.” Roy sat down on the edge of the bed and reached over to finger the blonde bangs.

“What kind of incentive,” Ed asked, smiling.

Roy leaned over and picked up the bowl, removed the top and then licked it, appreciating how Ed’s eyes moved from Roy’s eyes to his tongue. Roy then tossed the lid of the bowl back on the bedside table and tilted it so Ed could see into it.

“The chocolate kind,” Roy said.

“Chocolate?” Ed leaned up on his elbows for a closer look.

“We’re going to have pudding sex,” Roy informed him.

Golden eyebrows furrowed.

“Pudding sex,” Ed looked askance.

“I see you need a practical demonstration.” Roy dipped one finger into the bowl and stuck it in Ed’s navel.

Ed gaped then snorted.

“It’s cold!” the teen huffed, “and now I’ll get sticky.”

Roy rolled his eyes, put a hand on Ed’s chest, pushed him onto his back again, leaned over and lapped the pudding out of Ed’s navel with his tongue.

Ed squeaked and shivered and squirmed. Roy added more pudding and Ed shook and then he laughed.

There is nothing more intoxicating than that sound.

It only encouraged Roy to get several fingers into the pudding and smear it on Ed’s stomach. The chorus of grunts, giggles, half shrieks and pure genuine laughter filled every corner of the bedroom. Ed laughed with his entire body. Cheeks flushed, eyes screwed shut, mouth open. He tried to escape only to be drug back by his ankle. He pushed on Roy’s head with his flesh hand, he tried to roll over only to be thwarted when Roy planted a knee between his legs, he finally pleaded for mercy between hoarse gasps and flailing limbs, and panted gratefully when Roy pulled back.

You are beautiful.

Ed looked up at him with tear damped eyes and tried to scowl, it was not very effective.

“Now,” Roy said, moving to lie on his side beside Ed, “It’s your turn.”

And he offered Ed the bowl.


Roy Mustang gasped and tried desperately to think of other things. Ice water, ugly people, paperwork. Ed’s tongue was working a warm, wet path from his right nipple to his navel. He stopped and pulled up, applied more pudding down the line of Roy’s stomach and went back to work. Roy was so erect it hurt. Ed’s tongue dipped into his navel and Roy, not given to being ticklish, groaned loudly. Ed’s pudding smeared face bobbed up to look at him.

“Don’t stop,” Roy managed to somehow force out of his mouth, which was a minor miracle.

I’ll never walk again.

But Ed never went any further than his belly button. In fact, he stubbornly lingered there. Soon Roy was pounding his head on the bed, but that didn’t make Ed move. Making frantic scrabbling motions in the sheets with his fingers didn’t make Ed move either.
Only marked desperation would work now.

Roy tilted his head back and took a deep breath.

“Have all my teachings been in vain?” He appealed very loudly to the ceiling. He felt Ed go still.

“I’ve tried to be a good teacher,” Roy forged ahead, “I know that I might not be the most patient man on this planet, but I was sure my pupil, a supposed prodigy would learn by example.” Roy slung an arm across his eyes, melodramatic perhaps, but the visual should be effective.

There was a too long period of time where silence reigned supreme, and no part of Edward was touching him.

Then finally, Ed spoke.

“So, I take it…you want me to use my mouth?” he said.

“That is the general idea,” Roy gritted out.

“Ok, well….” And there were some noises of Ed shifting around. But still no action seemed forthcoming.

“What’s the hold up?” Roy asked.

“Well, I’m working out logistics,” Ed said neutrally.

“There is nothing to work out Ed,” Roy said struggling to keep his tone in check. Don’t make Ed defensive, not now. God above, not now. A defensive Ed would argue a point until next year.

More silence.

“Use the pudding Ed,” Roy grated out.

“Right, the pudding,” Ed said.

There was a brief tentative touch on Roy’s sorely neglected erection causing both it and Roy to jerk. The touch fled.

“Oh my god now what?!” Roy said, voice getting strained.

“It jumped,” Ed said.

Roy slammed his hands down on the bed and painfully hauled himself into a sitting position. Ed leaned back and the bowl was jerked from his grasp. Roy used his fingers to get a generous amount of pudding and smear it on the body part in question, and oh my god the temptation to just do it himself was so strong, then thrust the bowl back and Ed and slammed himself back down on the bed.

“No need to get so defensive,” Ed said, “ I was going to do it.”

“When, tomorrow?” Roy returned.

Roy felt Ed’s hand on his thigh. He heard Ed take a deep breath.

And then Ed licked.

Roy saw fireworks, he saw goddamn fireworks. His whole body contracted to one madly throbbing point between his legs and took all his rational with it, and it wasn’t just a lick, Ed smacked his damn lips.

Heaven? Hell? Which is it? I don’t know anymore. Help. Somebody help. Somebody come in here and make Ed lick me again.

But Ed didn’t need any help, because Ed licked him again. Every nerve in Roy’s body sent a package via express delivery to his brain demanding the most outrageous of things. He desperately tried to shove his fingers into the mattress as his vision swam. Then there were fingers, fingers around his cock, and then there was something else closing around the head.

Ok, must be heaven.

Ed gave one tentative suck. Roy gave one throaty moan. Encouraged, Ed sucked again and again, sliding mostly off the bed, feet on the floor between Roy’s legs and leaning over him sucking slowly and with great uncertainty, but seeming to get the hang of it all the same. But he was taking his time. The bowl of pudding sat abandoned on the bed by Roy’s side, and Ed thinking he had all the time in the world, finally scratched fingers through the course black hair in the junction of Roy’s thighs and took another suck.

No I was wrong, this is hell.

“Ed,” Roy said raggedly, panting, “Go faster.”

“Umm?” Ed said with his mouth full.

“Faster,” Roy was well aware of the plea in his voice.

Ed paused as if to consider the request. But before Roy could wail a protest he started up again, moving faster in his sucking, but not really going any further than just the head. Roy made a strangled noise.

BRAT!

“Ed…more, you can do more…ED, come on!” Roy bit his lower lip. Control, control, control! Ed’s first blow job after all, learning curve, goddamn PRODIGY, control!

But Roy was only flesh, and flesh was weak.

He bucked.

Things after that became a blur of motion.

Ed suddenly had something large forced too far into his throat, his eyes got huge, he gagged and he reflexively bit down.

Roy’s own eyes got wide and a sound he’d never heard before in his life tore its way free of his throat. He twisted savagely to the side, pulling himself free of Ed, thus allowing Ed to breathe, and curled up into such a small fetal ball he could have fit back into his mother’s womb. He hardly heard the gasping and wretching going on beside the bed because his own brain was reeling from the thousands of packages one particular portion of his anatomy had sent ultra express courier right to the gray matter’s attention. He did somehow dully recognize the running beats of one soft thud and one hard thud across the wood floor of the bedroom and onto the tile floor of the bathroom. After that, he gave into his brain’s attempts to restore order and calm and focused on just breathing for a bit.

He didn’t know how long it was until his stomach muscles ceased the lock down panic protocol and allowed him to uncurl. He sat up slowly and carefully and then parted his legs and had a look. The first thought in his mind, naturally, was to relieve Edward Elric of every tooth in his goddamn head. The second thought to cross his mind was where was Edward Elric so he could relieve him of every tooth in his goddamn head?

The bathroom. Ed hadn’t come out of the bathroom yet. Roy slid to the edge of the bed, put his feet on the floor and stood slowly. So far, so good. The first step wasn’t painful, neither was the second. Ok so maybe not every goddamn tooth. Roy padded over to the bathroom door and looked in, jaw set.

Ed was sitting on the toilet with a towel over his lap, his head down and blonde hair obscuring his features. Other than that, the bathroom seemed to be normal, so Roy walked in slowly over to where Ed sat quietly. What did one say to his lover when said lover tried to emasculate them? Roy cleared his throat, but Ed beat him to it.

“I bit you,” Edward said in a voice so unlike Edward, that for a moment Roy thought he was hearing voices.

“I bit you after I asked you not to bite me,” Edward continued, something painful and raw around the edges of his words. Roy worked his jaw, trying to figure out what to say.

“It’s one thing to ask someone not to do something,” Ed forged on, voice picking up a little in the silence, “But then to do it yourself, that’s not right.” Ed slowly lifted his face to Roy’s, pudding smears still over his cheeks and chin. “I’m sorry,” Ed said, “Are you hurt?”

Roy slowly lowered himself to his knees on the cold tile of the bathroom floor, searching Ed’s eyes with his own dark ones.

“I’m alright Ed,” he said, “It was an accident and partly my fault anyway.”

“I’m a total fuck-up,” Ed shifted his gaze from Roy’s eyes to his chin, “I can’t seem to get anything right. All you were asking me to do was to make you feel good like you make me feel good, and I couldn’t even do that. It seems to be my lot in life to mess the good things up.”

“Stop it,” Roy said, placing his hands to either side of Ed’s towel covered thighs, “Just stop it right now. This isn’t worth that. Don’t go comparing this to the important things in your life that you are striving to put right. The effort alone is enough. This is nothing. This isn’t unfixable. Ed, look at me.”

Ed tracked his eyes back up to Roy’s own.

Roy smiled.

“Up until you bit me,” Roy said, “it was great.” And he leaned forward a little, to almost touch noses.

Unbidden, the corner’s of Ed’s mouth turn up just a little.

Congratulations Edward Elric. You got me on my knees.


They lay side by side in comfortable silence for a while. The Roy slid his arm under Ed’s shoulders and rolled him against his side. Ed’s automail arm tucked beneath him, and his flesh arm moved to lie over Roy’s chest.

“When do you think you’ll let me try again,” Ed asked, drawing idle circles on Roy’s flesh with one finger.

“Initially, never,” Roy said, “But upon reconsideration we can try again, later of course. I have to talk my dick into not being scared of you.”

Ed groaned and snickered.

“You have a really twisted sense of humor,” Ed said, “Talking about it like it has a mind of its own.”

Roy laughed.

“You’ll get there Ed, trust me. You’ll get there.”