Gensomaden Saiyuki Fan Fiction ❯ Everybody Loves My Baby ❯ Chapter 1

Everybody Wants My Baby

 

Part 1

 

"Hey, kappa!"
"Idiot, don't talk with your mouth full!" snarls Gojyo, dusting bits of food off his shirt.
Goku hastily swallows. "Listen, I wanna ask you something" - a little hesitantly, big golden eyes upturned, and one hand loosely clasping another bun. He twists to make sure Hakkai is still down the road, at the entrance of a shop.
"What, again?" asks Gojyo. "Didn't it work?"
"nooooo! And I don't know what to do!" Goku wails.
"Jump him." advises Gojyo, succinctly, and sneaks the last roll off Goku's plate. Goku doesn't notice. Wait a minute. Gojyo puts the roll down and stares at Goku. He's got it that bad, huh?
"Sanzo would just Kill me. And then I'd never get to - you know - " Goku trails off, utterly dejected.
"You realise you're not getting to you-know now either, eh, monkey? What have you got to lose?" asks Gojyo, still staring incredulously at Goku's empty plate.

Goku pouts.
Gojyo sighs.

"Gojyooooooo"
"Give me a minute, okay? Gotta think of something creative, now"

This is obviously a matter of great importance. They both share a quiet, contemplative moment.

"Okay, got it. Try this...." and Gojyo leans forward and begins to explain, using two table spoons, a fork, a plastic straw, a napkin and a strategically positioned salt shaker.

* * *

Hakkai watches them from across the room. Light slides through the dirty window pane and catches the glints in Gojyo's eyes as he gestures wildly, while talking to Goku. So beautiful, he thinks, and then, Mine. Hakkai moves closer and is about two greet them when a few strange phrases stop him in his tracks. Then, leaning closer, he spots the .......interesting....table arrangement. One perfect eyebrow lifts. He listens, attentively, and at a precisely selected moment, he clears his throat.

Goku and Gojyo jump as though they've been shot. Only they have been shot before, and this is worse.
"Er, Hakkai, hey, didn't know you were back? Great shopping, here, huh? Oh, that's some awesome soap you got there, man." Gojyo is babbling, and he knows it. Goku is absolutely silent.
"Goku, Gojyo, is there anything you want to tell me?" asks Hakkai, in his most menacingly pleasant tone. He notes the position of the fork - is that even possible? Must try. I wonder if Gojyo could - and then, the salt shaker - oh, my.
"It's Sanzo!" Goku suddenly blurts, and Hakkai looks at him, then at the curiously positioned spoon, and then back at Goku.
"It's just that I want him so badly, and he won't and and I tried and then I asked Gojyo and stuff 'cause he wants him too so I thought he'd you know, have ideas and stuff, but it didn't work, so I asked him again, and - "
"Breathe, Goku!" Hakkai admonishes.
Goku obediently pants, fish-eyed and anxious, hoping Hakkai will make it better.
Gojyo winces, and prepares to die. Damned monkey and his flapping mouth. Maybe Hakkai will be kind and kill me straight instead of cutting my balls off and letting me bleed to death. I'll never get to you-know either, now.
Hakkai sits down, still smiling pleasantly.
Uh, oh, thinks Goku. Not good.

"Well, there's no call to be secretive about it, is there? I do think he is quite attractive myself, so I can sympathise with you, Goku." Hakkai calmly pops a dumpling into his mouth and chews.
Gojyo's mind has stopped. Perhaps forever.
Goku is staring, boggled.
"And you, too, Gojyo" adds Hakkai, and carefully selects another dumpling from the plate.
There is utter silence for few minutes.
"Perhaps I could be of some assistance?" asks Hakkai, politely.

He leans over to Gojyo, and whispers, making Gojyo choke, and sit up, straight. Goku dives across the table to listen in, and the table cloth shifts, making the salt shaker wobble just so. Hakkai shivers. Three heads begin to confabulate.

Back in the room of their inn, Sanzo checks the lock on the door once more, and then settles down on the bed, in just his robes - his robes!- and slides the unloaded, oiled gun against the palm of his hand. Privacy is hard to come by, and he plans to relish this little time alone. He leans back on the pillow and sighs, as he starts to collapse into a shivery, helpless sort of heat.

That night, at dinner, Hakkai asks Gojyo to pass the salt.
Gojyo collapses and falls under the table. Goku chokes on his food, and Sanzo whips out his gun, fires two shots into the air, and then strokes the barrel surreptitiously as he puts it away.
Hakkai smiles.