Gensomaden Saiyuki Fan Fiction ❯ Learn ❯ How to Drive ( One-Shot )

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Author: Anne (and elaborated by Aria)

Email: azie89@bluehyppo.com

Disclaimer: I don't own Saiyuuki, nor am getting money for this. Please don't sue... *violent sobs*

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Part One -- How to drive

Hakkai: (cheerful as usual)What do you want to learn this morning?

Sanzou: (frowning)I hate Maths.

Gojou: I hate Science. *The hell I do…(leers inwardly)*

Gokuu: (blank face) I…I'll learn anything!

Gojou: Then, lets learn how to smoke.

Sanzou: Damn! (veins pop out) You want to TEACH the monkey to SMOKE!? (hits Gojou's head with his harisen)

Gojou: Ouch! Theeheehee… sorry.

Hakkai : (sweatdrops a bit) I ask again, do you wanna learn from me?

Gojou : Oh, yes! I want to learn magic!

Sanzou: (more veins pop out) Stupid kappa! What were you THINKING about?

*THWACK* (sound of the harisen hitting Gojou square in the head)

Gojou: Ouch! Damn bouzu!! How many times must you HIT me?

Sanzou: Eight more times make ten. (calmly whacks Gojou)

*Thwack**thwack**thwack**thwack**thwack**thwack**thwack**THWACK*

Hakkai and Gokuu: (sweatdrops, staring at forming bumps on Gojou's head)

Gojou: Ouch, ouch ,ouch, ouch, ouch, ouch, ouch, OUCH!! *What's this damn monk thinking about?*

Hakkai: (smiling) You're good at Maths, Sanzou.

Sanzou: (flushes a bit) Enh… a bit.

Hakkai: (smiles) Do you want to learn how to drive?

Sanzou: I want to, but…

Hakkai: Come, let's go.

At the field…

Hakkai: Okay, everybody out. Sanzou, first, turn the key like this.

Sanzou: (scribbles in a notebook) First, turn the key like this.

Hakkai: You don't have to write it down.

Sanzou: (scribbles in notebook) You don't have to wr--Ee?? What did you say, Hakkai?

Hakkai: (takes notebook and pencil from Sanzou) I said you didn't have to write it down.

Sanzou: Oh. So, the second step is…?

Hakkai: The second step, let the engine warm up.

Sanzou: The second step, let-- where's my book? WHERE'S MY BOOK!!?? (prepares to shoot Hakkai who is nearest to him)

Hakkai: (sweatdrops like crazy) I told you, you don't have to write it down.

Sanzou: Really?

Hakkai: Third, you'd want to drive, yes?

Sanzou: Not really.

Hakkai: (confused) Then, what do you want to learn for?

Sanzou: Because you wanted to teach me how to.

Hakkai: (sweatdrops)

Gojou: (from afar) Give it up Sanzou, you'll never--

Sanzou: (appears very suddenly in front of Gojou, left eye twitching) Never what?

Gojou: Never.. never..

Sanzou: Never WHAT!?

Hakkai: Maa, maa, that's enough, Sanzou. You must learn this first.

(Sanzou sulks and heads back to Hakkai)

Gojou: (whispers to Gokuu) Never learn.

Gokuu: (aloud) Ooohh… he'll never learn. Never learn what, Gojou?

(Gojou desperately tries to silence Gokuu)

Sanzou: (appeared behind Gojou, veins throbbing) THAT'S what you're gonna say? Take this present from me, then.

*THWACK**THWACK**THWACK**CRACK* (sound of the harisen hitting poor Gojou's head)

Gojou: OOOOWWWW!!! I pray gods make me immune to all this.

Sanzou: You never will. (heads back again to Hakkai)

Hakkai: (even more cheerful) Okay student Sanzou, get ye ready to drive this Jeep!

Sanzou: What the hell--- You want me to get an accident??

Hakkai: You weren't paying enough attention and you were-- quarreling? back there. Now, get in.

Sanzou: *Since when did he get to be so inconsiderate…sigh* Oh, okay. (climbs aboard Jeep) First, turn the key. Second,… what?

Hakkai: (sweatdrops) Let the engine warm up.

Sanzou: Oh right. (waits a few seconds) Then shift into gear and feed the gas as hard as you can.

Hakkai: (sweatdrops like mad) Oh no Sanzou you're CRAZY!! HAKURYUU!!!

*VROOMMM**BANG**SLAM**CRUNCH**Psssssss* (sound of Hakuryuu slamming into a hillside)

Hakkai, Gojou and Gokuu: SANZOU!! (run to Sanzou's aid)

Hakkai: The hell why did you shift into fifth gear!? You shoulda shift into first, then second, than third…..

Sanzou: Damn! Dammit!! I swear by the seven heavens, I WILL NEVER EVER DRIVE AGAIN!!

Gokuu: It's a miracle you survived.

Hakuryuu: Kyuu… (blacks out)

Hakkai: HAKURYUU!! Sanzou, I swear I'll never let you drive Hakuryuu again!!

Sanzou: The hell I will… (blacks out)

-owari part one-

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Author's note:

The ideas are mine, but Aria helped type them out for me `coz I don't know how to type fast. *thanks Aria* And she helps post this… thingy? *thanks Aria*

There's more to come.^^