Gravitation Fan Fiction ❯ Apogee ❯ Chapter XXVIII ( Chapter 28 )
[ X - Adult: No readers under 18. Contains Graphic Adult Themes/Extreme violence. ]
By: Saanrio 
When Shuichi leaves Yuki, he finds that he has more in common with Seguchi Tohma than either could have imagined, leaving Shuichi with a difficult choice.
Anime/Manga: Gravitation Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Drama / Romance / Angst | Type: Yaoi | Uploaded On: 12.08.2008 | Pages: 1 | Words: 2.2K | Visits: 302 | Status: Work In Progress
When Shuichi leaves Yuki, he finds that he has more in common with Seguchi Tohma than either could have imagined, leaving Shuichi with a difficult choice.
Anime/Manga: Gravitation Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Drama / Romance / Angst | Type: Yaoi | Uploaded On: 12.08.2008 | Pages: 1 | Words: 2.2K | Visits: 302 | Status: Work In Progress
Disclaimer: Gravitation is not owned by me, it is owned by Maki Murakami. I own nothing.
Tohma looked out over the crowded ballroom, pleased with how the evening had gone. NG artists had been nominated in almost every category at the awards that evening, and they had only lost in three of those they had been nominated for. Nittle Grasper and Bad Luck had even split their shared categories, so Tohma had even more reason to be pleased. Given the overwhelming popularity of "Fate," regardless of how Shuichi chose to sing it on any given occasion, it was inevitable that they would take the Best Song category. Nittle Grasper had edged them out again, though, on the Artist of the Year category. Tohma tugged slightly on the hem of his jacket, pulling out a wrinkle only he could see as he began to cross the room toward his date sitting at the bar. The young starlet had been seen with him at every important function in the past month and a few tabloid pictures had surfaced of the two of them in various embraces, all carefully calculated to enhance both of their careers. She was pretty, and reasonably intelligent, but Tohma held no real interest in her.
His eyes strayed away from the girl, surveying the room as he crossed slowly, the king of his domain, stopping here and there to chat with this person or that, promise an interview with this magazine and politely turn that one down. He looked over the various performers on the NG label who had come out, several popular bands in Japan, several who were gaining popularity in Europe or America, a few who recorded in LA and a few from New York. As a result, his New York and LA heads were here as well. He nodded politely to Jason Nikagawa from LA and to Sheila Jackson, who headed the New York division of NG. Both were trusted associates who earned their pay by finding and keeping new artists. Though LA handled more of their Japanese artists, a few occasionally went to New York -- Ryuichi most notably -- and Sheila was instrumental in keeping them in line and away from the competition. His gaze wandered further across the room, to where a pink-streaked head was thrown back and a triumphant yell was being let out as Shindou Shuichi was hoisted onto his best friend's shoulders. Bad Luck had been celebrating all night, as had Nittle Grasper, though Tohma himself had kept a more reserved composure than the rest of his fellow musicians.
Tohma reached the bar and ordered a drink, turning back to watch the celebration as he waited, ignoring the young woman next to him who was pouting prettily as she tried to get his attention and was ignored. Shuichi was in his element, seeming to shine even across the crowded room, his laughter infectious. Tohma caught a genuine smile beginning to turn up the corners of his mouth and allowed it for a brief moment before schooling his features into the false mask he used in public and turning toward his date. She seemed happy he had finally decided to pay her some attention, and smiled as she began talking a mile a minute, completely oblivious to the fact that Tohma still wasn't listening. Tohma's mind was still across the room, and he turned just slightly, so he could keep an eye on Bad Luck's group of celebrants out of the corner of his eye.
The past months since Shuichi had returned to work had been difficult for Tohma. He spent the same late hours working that he always had, but he had quietly moved Nittle Grasper to a later schedule, minimizing the chance that he would run into Shuichi. He had rarely seen the younger man since he had brought the doctor to Eiri's apartment. He knew he had been the cause of Shuichi's condition, and it had torn him apart. Eiri had tried to call him several times since then, but Tohma never answered. Instead, he had made his displeasure known to Tohma's voice mail and his answering machine. Tohma had listened to every bitter word, every accusation, and every promise of what Eiri would do to him if Shuichi didn't get better and known he deserved all of them. But now Shuichi was better, physically at least, and apparently his heart had healed as well. Tohma had read the recent interview he had given and had wished he hadn't. Shuichi's confession to the reporter had ripped at a part of him he had been trying very hard to ignore and push aside. He had his own reputation to think of, and he certainly could not expect the same reaction that Shuichi and Eiri had received from the public. It was better this way, he told himself for what had to be the thousandth time, and turned his attention fully away from the group celebrating Bad Luck's success.
He began to distantly listen to his date, caught that she was talking about her manager wanting her to try singing, and cringed internally, letting none of it show on his face. He had heard her singing, once, when she hadn't realized he was there. She was atrocious, and if she got a contract it would be solely because someone was hoping to cash in on her name and not because of her voice. When she steered the conversation to the possibility of a contract with NG, Tohma told her quite bluntly that he wouldn't give her a contract, couching it in terms of their relationship and avoiding accusations of favoritism. He saw the explosion coming only a split second before it hit. She bawled, loudly, that he didn't love her and that he was being mean, but he could see the hints that told that her tears were all for show, all to get him to agree. He hardened his resolve, the smile leaving his face as he calmly told her that he could not abide such behavior and that it would be best if they called everything off now. He thought after he walked away that telling her he would pay for cab fare to get her home was probably what brought out the real tears.
As he walked away, he glanced one more time toward Bad Luck's table, noting that the head of the LA office had apparently gone to extend congratulations. It wasn't a surprise, Tohma had heard of the party he had thrown for the band when they had finished recording, just as he had heard that there had seemed to be more to Nikagawa's interest in Bad Luck than their music. A shock of blonde off to his left caught his attention and he turned away from Bad Luck and quickly spotted Eiri walking towards him. He sighed softly, knowing this meeting had been a long time coming, and nodded to Eiri before cocking his head toward the exit and heading in that direction, knowing Eiri would follow. The door led out to a small patio where a table and a few chairs were set up, a few ashtrays dotting the surface of the table. Tohma had a seat in one of the chairs, waiting patiently as Eiri lit a cigarette and paced for a moment before sitting down and staring at Tohma unblinkingly.
"You haven't answered when I call."
Eiri's angry tone wasn't surprising to Tohma in the slightest, and again he knew he deserved it. He nodded slowly, then took a sip of the drink still held lightly in his hand. He watched Eiri puff angrily at his cigarette for a moment before speaking.
"I have listened to every message you left, Eiri. I deserved every word, I just did not see the need to call back to tell you so."
Eiri's eyes were narrowed as he stared at Tohma.
"I was right? Then why are you dating some overly made-up tart instead of fixing what you caused?"
Tohma sighed. "Because my actions were carefully calculated to drive him away. The things I love, that I allow to stay close to me -- they all wind up damaged in some way, Eiri. It’s better that I hurt him a little bit now than allow him to stay that close, and take the risk of him being hurt as you were, as Mika was, or worse."
Tohma could see the gears turning in Eiri's head, could tell that he was trying to put all of the pieces together, but he didn't want to prolong the discussion any further. He stood, draining the last of his drink as he did so, then setting the glass down on the table.
"If you will excuse me, Eiri, I have some business associates I need to touch bases with this evening." He didn't wait for Eiri to answer, just turned and walked back inside, only dimly noting that Hiro moved out of the way as he walked inside before continuing on his way. His eyes scanned the room, catching sight of several people he should speak to, but he kept looking, not wanting to admit that he was looking for Shuichi. He realized he couldn't see the pink-streaked mop anywhere near where Bad Luck had been when he went outside, though Fujisaki was still at the table, chatting with a girl. He made his way in that direction, barely coming to a stop in time to avoid bumping into Ryuichi as he suddenly jumped in Tohma's path.
Ryuichi seemed his normal, bubbly self as he screeched Tohma's name at the top of his lungs, followed by a rousing 'na no da!' but Tohma noticed the almost predatory light in his eyes that he saw at live performances. Ryuichi was serious about something, and it was something big. He stood still and hardly wavered at all when Ryuichi jumped at him, hugging him tightly and whispering in his ear. He felt his back stiffening and made a conscious effort to keep his face from changing expression. The bit of gossip that Ryuichi was whispering to him was something he really didn't want to hear, but knew he had to on several levels.
When Ryuichi stepped back and smiled before running off again, he looked briefly around the room, then planned his route. His path took him past almost all of the associates and reporters he needed to finish speaking with, either quickly concluding their business with a slightly pained smile and a minimum of necessary politeness, or arranging a meeting for the following week if what needed to be said would take too long. A mere ten minutes later found him waiting for the hotel elevator while entering appointments into his cell phone and emailing the information to his secretary. She would take care of any scheduling conflicts he might have caused, and make sure everything was arranged for the meetings. It was what he paid her for, after all.
The elevator had never seemed so slow as he rode it from the second floor up to his penthouse suite. He thought back to what Ryuichi had told him and found his hand reaching out to press the button for another floor, but pulled his hand back at the last moment, firmly reminding himself that he had pushed Shuichi away, he had decided it was best Shuichi find someone else, and he had given away the right to change that now. Tohma moved both of his hands behind his back, grasping his fingers together tightly, lest they go wandering by themselves yet again before the elevator reached his floor. He walked slowly down the hallway, trying to fool himself into believing that he didn't care. It didn't matter if what Ryuichi had told him was true. Shuichi was allowed to associate with whomever he wished, Tohma had no romantic hold on him. He could, if he chose, make things difficult for Nikagawa, but that would be childish and pointless.
Once the door to his suite was closed, he shrugged out of his jacket after leaving his shoes in the small closet by the door. He then walked calmly to the bedroom, rolling up his sleeves and leaving his jacket, hat and gloves neatly on the valet stand. He strolled back out into the main room, taking his phone from his pocket and calling his secretary. The woman had not been obliged to attend the event tonight and had begged off to see a recital one of her children was performing in. Glancing at the clock, he knew he would probably be waking her, but he was equally sure she would forgive him. She always did when she saw the generous paychecks he signed. She was drowsy, but seemed awake enough to do as he had asked by the time he hung up his phone. He smiled, knowing things would be arranged as he wanted them to be and headed off to have a bath before slipping into bed. He had an early meeting and needed to try to be rested for it.
Tohma looked out over the crowded ballroom, pleased with how the evening had gone. NG artists had been nominated in almost every category at the awards that evening, and they had only lost in three of those they had been nominated for. Nittle Grasper and Bad Luck had even split their shared categories, so Tohma had even more reason to be pleased. Given the overwhelming popularity of "Fate," regardless of how Shuichi chose to sing it on any given occasion, it was inevitable that they would take the Best Song category. Nittle Grasper had edged them out again, though, on the Artist of the Year category. Tohma tugged slightly on the hem of his jacket, pulling out a wrinkle only he could see as he began to cross the room toward his date sitting at the bar. The young starlet had been seen with him at every important function in the past month and a few tabloid pictures had surfaced of the two of them in various embraces, all carefully calculated to enhance both of their careers. She was pretty, and reasonably intelligent, but Tohma held no real interest in her.
His eyes strayed away from the girl, surveying the room as he crossed slowly, the king of his domain, stopping here and there to chat with this person or that, promise an interview with this magazine and politely turn that one down. He looked over the various performers on the NG label who had come out, several popular bands in Japan, several who were gaining popularity in Europe or America, a few who recorded in LA and a few from New York. As a result, his New York and LA heads were here as well. He nodded politely to Jason Nikagawa from LA and to Sheila Jackson, who headed the New York division of NG. Both were trusted associates who earned their pay by finding and keeping new artists. Though LA handled more of their Japanese artists, a few occasionally went to New York -- Ryuichi most notably -- and Sheila was instrumental in keeping them in line and away from the competition. His gaze wandered further across the room, to where a pink-streaked head was thrown back and a triumphant yell was being let out as Shindou Shuichi was hoisted onto his best friend's shoulders. Bad Luck had been celebrating all night, as had Nittle Grasper, though Tohma himself had kept a more reserved composure than the rest of his fellow musicians.
Tohma reached the bar and ordered a drink, turning back to watch the celebration as he waited, ignoring the young woman next to him who was pouting prettily as she tried to get his attention and was ignored. Shuichi was in his element, seeming to shine even across the crowded room, his laughter infectious. Tohma caught a genuine smile beginning to turn up the corners of his mouth and allowed it for a brief moment before schooling his features into the false mask he used in public and turning toward his date. She seemed happy he had finally decided to pay her some attention, and smiled as she began talking a mile a minute, completely oblivious to the fact that Tohma still wasn't listening. Tohma's mind was still across the room, and he turned just slightly, so he could keep an eye on Bad Luck's group of celebrants out of the corner of his eye.
The past months since Shuichi had returned to work had been difficult for Tohma. He spent the same late hours working that he always had, but he had quietly moved Nittle Grasper to a later schedule, minimizing the chance that he would run into Shuichi. He had rarely seen the younger man since he had brought the doctor to Eiri's apartment. He knew he had been the cause of Shuichi's condition, and it had torn him apart. Eiri had tried to call him several times since then, but Tohma never answered. Instead, he had made his displeasure known to Tohma's voice mail and his answering machine. Tohma had listened to every bitter word, every accusation, and every promise of what Eiri would do to him if Shuichi didn't get better and known he deserved all of them. But now Shuichi was better, physically at least, and apparently his heart had healed as well. Tohma had read the recent interview he had given and had wished he hadn't. Shuichi's confession to the reporter had ripped at a part of him he had been trying very hard to ignore and push aside. He had his own reputation to think of, and he certainly could not expect the same reaction that Shuichi and Eiri had received from the public. It was better this way, he told himself for what had to be the thousandth time, and turned his attention fully away from the group celebrating Bad Luck's success.
He began to distantly listen to his date, caught that she was talking about her manager wanting her to try singing, and cringed internally, letting none of it show on his face. He had heard her singing, once, when she hadn't realized he was there. She was atrocious, and if she got a contract it would be solely because someone was hoping to cash in on her name and not because of her voice. When she steered the conversation to the possibility of a contract with NG, Tohma told her quite bluntly that he wouldn't give her a contract, couching it in terms of their relationship and avoiding accusations of favoritism. He saw the explosion coming only a split second before it hit. She bawled, loudly, that he didn't love her and that he was being mean, but he could see the hints that told that her tears were all for show, all to get him to agree. He hardened his resolve, the smile leaving his face as he calmly told her that he could not abide such behavior and that it would be best if they called everything off now. He thought after he walked away that telling her he would pay for cab fare to get her home was probably what brought out the real tears.
As he walked away, he glanced one more time toward Bad Luck's table, noting that the head of the LA office had apparently gone to extend congratulations. It wasn't a surprise, Tohma had heard of the party he had thrown for the band when they had finished recording, just as he had heard that there had seemed to be more to Nikagawa's interest in Bad Luck than their music. A shock of blonde off to his left caught his attention and he turned away from Bad Luck and quickly spotted Eiri walking towards him. He sighed softly, knowing this meeting had been a long time coming, and nodded to Eiri before cocking his head toward the exit and heading in that direction, knowing Eiri would follow. The door led out to a small patio where a table and a few chairs were set up, a few ashtrays dotting the surface of the table. Tohma had a seat in one of the chairs, waiting patiently as Eiri lit a cigarette and paced for a moment before sitting down and staring at Tohma unblinkingly.
"You haven't answered when I call."
Eiri's angry tone wasn't surprising to Tohma in the slightest, and again he knew he deserved it. He nodded slowly, then took a sip of the drink still held lightly in his hand. He watched Eiri puff angrily at his cigarette for a moment before speaking.
"I have listened to every message you left, Eiri. I deserved every word, I just did not see the need to call back to tell you so."
Eiri's eyes were narrowed as he stared at Tohma.
"I was right? Then why are you dating some overly made-up tart instead of fixing what you caused?"
Tohma sighed. "Because my actions were carefully calculated to drive him away. The things I love, that I allow to stay close to me -- they all wind up damaged in some way, Eiri. It’s better that I hurt him a little bit now than allow him to stay that close, and take the risk of him being hurt as you were, as Mika was, or worse."
Tohma could see the gears turning in Eiri's head, could tell that he was trying to put all of the pieces together, but he didn't want to prolong the discussion any further. He stood, draining the last of his drink as he did so, then setting the glass down on the table.
"If you will excuse me, Eiri, I have some business associates I need to touch bases with this evening." He didn't wait for Eiri to answer, just turned and walked back inside, only dimly noting that Hiro moved out of the way as he walked inside before continuing on his way. His eyes scanned the room, catching sight of several people he should speak to, but he kept looking, not wanting to admit that he was looking for Shuichi. He realized he couldn't see the pink-streaked mop anywhere near where Bad Luck had been when he went outside, though Fujisaki was still at the table, chatting with a girl. He made his way in that direction, barely coming to a stop in time to avoid bumping into Ryuichi as he suddenly jumped in Tohma's path.
Ryuichi seemed his normal, bubbly self as he screeched Tohma's name at the top of his lungs, followed by a rousing 'na no da!' but Tohma noticed the almost predatory light in his eyes that he saw at live performances. Ryuichi was serious about something, and it was something big. He stood still and hardly wavered at all when Ryuichi jumped at him, hugging him tightly and whispering in his ear. He felt his back stiffening and made a conscious effort to keep his face from changing expression. The bit of gossip that Ryuichi was whispering to him was something he really didn't want to hear, but knew he had to on several levels.
When Ryuichi stepped back and smiled before running off again, he looked briefly around the room, then planned his route. His path took him past almost all of the associates and reporters he needed to finish speaking with, either quickly concluding their business with a slightly pained smile and a minimum of necessary politeness, or arranging a meeting for the following week if what needed to be said would take too long. A mere ten minutes later found him waiting for the hotel elevator while entering appointments into his cell phone and emailing the information to his secretary. She would take care of any scheduling conflicts he might have caused, and make sure everything was arranged for the meetings. It was what he paid her for, after all.
The elevator had never seemed so slow as he rode it from the second floor up to his penthouse suite. He thought back to what Ryuichi had told him and found his hand reaching out to press the button for another floor, but pulled his hand back at the last moment, firmly reminding himself that he had pushed Shuichi away, he had decided it was best Shuichi find someone else, and he had given away the right to change that now. Tohma moved both of his hands behind his back, grasping his fingers together tightly, lest they go wandering by themselves yet again before the elevator reached his floor. He walked slowly down the hallway, trying to fool himself into believing that he didn't care. It didn't matter if what Ryuichi had told him was true. Shuichi was allowed to associate with whomever he wished, Tohma had no romantic hold on him. He could, if he chose, make things difficult for Nikagawa, but that would be childish and pointless.
Once the door to his suite was closed, he shrugged out of his jacket after leaving his shoes in the small closet by the door. He then walked calmly to the bedroom, rolling up his sleeves and leaving his jacket, hat and gloves neatly on the valet stand. He strolled back out into the main room, taking his phone from his pocket and calling his secretary. The woman had not been obliged to attend the event tonight and had begged off to see a recital one of her children was performing in. Glancing at the clock, he knew he would probably be waking her, but he was equally sure she would forgive him. She always did when she saw the generous paychecks he signed. She was drowsy, but seemed awake enough to do as he had asked by the time he hung up his phone. He smiled, knowing things would be arranged as he wanted them to be and headed off to have a bath before slipping into bed. He had an early meeting and needed to try to be rested for it.