Gravitation Fan Fiction ❯ Bittersweet Void ❯ Chapter 1

Bittersweet Void

 

I do not own Gravitation.

 

Chapter One

 

The cold breeze played throughout his blonde hair, causing Yuki to shiver and pull his coat around him tighter. He meandered through the nighttime streets of New York, unsure of his reasons, but he felt obligated to remain. He had already rediscovered his dark past, but something unknown was still holding him here. After remembering what happened with Kitazawa at the young age of sixteen, he should have left and went home to Japan. He didn't go home though because he needed more answers, he just couldn't decipher what he was looking for. He had unknown, unfinished business to take care of.

 

He walked on the cracked sidewalk, bypassing and ignoring a prostitute who called out to him to get his attention. With a shake of his head he continued, not even bothering to acknowledge her existence.

 

He was somewhat annoyed by the people's antics here. If it wasn't a thug trying to sell him drugs it was a whore trying to sell her body. It was his fault though; he chose to remain in the bad side of town. Either way he wouldn't complain, it was refreshing opposed to the crazy obsessive fan girls in Japan. Here in New York he was a nobody—just your average person.

 

Yuki fished into his pockets, searching for his cigarettes. When he found them he put a cigarette in his mouth and pulled out his lighter. He paused in mid motion of opening the chrome lighter. On the side was a picture of him and Shuichi at Odaiba amusement park. The picture had been taken three months, one week, and two days ago. He sighed after a while of staring at the picture. Shuichi was so happy and carefree, probably still is. “The light to my darkness.” He shook the thought off, and opened the lid to his lighter, sparking his smoke.

 

He continued to walk, unsure of where his legs were carrying him. Nowadays they seemed to have a mind of their own, even when his mind was absent. He shrugged, trying to concentrate on his cigarette, it was better than thinking about the enigma that his life had become.

 

He now knew everything about his past that he had taken therapy and medication to forget. Oddly, now, it didn't affect him as it did in the past. He felt numb about the whole situation, so why did it seem that Kitazawa was still holding him back? There was an emptiness in him that would only grow with time. He should have been satisfied with his life, but he wasn't. He had everything that he could hope for: money, fame, and now mental content. Something was still missing.

 

He pitched his now finished cigarette onto the cement and stepped on it. He continued walking, detached from himself it seemed. After a while, he was brought back to earth when some one bumped into him. “Hey! Watch where you're going!” He looked to the voice only to see a man and woman walking away, holding hands. He stared longingly at the couple. After they disappeared around a corner, he shrugged the incident off and continued walking.

 

The next time he stopped was in front of a music store. The bright neon lights posted on the run-down, small building read Music of the World. Yuki sighed. He wasn't into music much, but he felt a strange urge to enter the store. After looking in through the window, sighting cds on numerous racks and cds lining the walls from the floor to the ceiling, he decided to go in.

 

A small bell rang as Yuki opened the glass door and stepped inside of the store. “Welcome to Music of the World. Here we have music from almost anywhere in the world. If you need help finding anything just let me know.” He ignored the young female clerk's greeting and wandered over to the far corner that had a sign hanging from the ceiling with Japan on it.

 

Almost immediately, he spotted Bad Luck's CD: Into Your Gravity. He picked it up idly and ran his fingers gentle across Shuichi's face. “Damn brat, look how far you've come,” He said with a small smile.

 

“Excuse me, sir?” the clerk asked, coming to his side.

 

“Nothing,” Yuki responded, putting the CD down, and walking out of the store.

 

To say that he felt empty would be an understatement. He felt incomplete, and looking at the CD didn't help. Could the answer that he was searching for in New York be in Japan? He cleared the thought from his head and continued without a set destination.

 

Within ten minutes, Yuki stopped. What seemed like the hundredth time since he been in New York, he found himself in the cemetery where Yuki Kitazawa laid. In habit, he walked over to the man's grave and stood there, staring at the tombstone. Slowly, but surely, Yuki had an epiphany.

 

Kitazawa was indeed holding him back. The dead man imprinted on his life, forcing him to not trust anyone, which in the end caused him to push the few people that were close to him away, including Shuichi. The reason he felt empty was because he had pushed Shuichi away. His better half had suffered because of Yuki Kitazawa. His eyes widened at the realization. He couldn't leave New York because he hadn't had closure with Kitazawa, and if he didn't the man would continue to ruin his life.

 

His undying anger for Kitazawa intensified ten fold. “You can go to hell, Yuki Kitazawa! No longer will you be the puppet master of me!” Yuki yelled before leaving the cemetery.

 

All because of Kitazawa, he lost years of joy and happiness. All because of Kitazawa, he had been traumatized. All because of Kitazawa, he may have ruined the best thing that ever happened to him. “Shuichi…” Yuki had to get home immediately. He hadn't heard from Shuichi since the day that he came to New York looking for him.

 

“I've…I've finally found you, Yuki,” Shuichi said breathlessly as he stood before Yuki panting.

 

“How…Shuichi...how did you…how did you find me—”

 

“Shut up! That doesn't matter one bit now!” Shuichi yelled, advancing on Yuki. “You disappeared without even letting me know!” The pink haired man finally stopped in front of Yuki and held his arm out. “See this?” Shuichi showed Yuki a paper with lyrics on it, “That time that… my lyrics that got blown by the wind. I finally finished writing the song. Look at it.”

 

Yuki took the page from Shuichi. He stared for a while before saying opening his mouth. “Hmph… You're always like this. You never think about the other person, do you? I used to be like that too. That's how… I pushed Kitazawa into a corner… and how I killed him.”

 

A few moments passed before Shuichi's voice broke the silence. “Don't be ridiculous…” Shuichi muttered, causing Yuki to make a surprised noise. “Don't be ridiculous!” Shuichi repeated, yelling this time. He placed his lips on Yuki's. “So what if I pressured you into a corner? Don't you think that you're gonna get away from me. You can run, or you can die, but I'll search for you and I'll find you. I'm never letting you get away from me,” he said. Yuki gave him a pointed look. “Why? Because I love you, Yuki!”

 

That day Shuichi told him that he couldn't run or even die without pursuing him. If that was the case then where was Shuichi now? Bad Luck's tour was over, and Yuki had meant to be home before then, but he didn't make the deadline. He had broken his promise. Still, shouldn't Shuichi have come for him already, or at least called? He wondered if everything with Shuichi was alright.

 

Yuki took out his cell phone and looked at it. It had been ages since the last time he actually used the thing, and he had forgotten he even had it. Having an obsessive sister and step brother who called you every five minutes could force a person to turn their phone off. Lately, he didn't even bother to look at the thing. He just put it on charge every night, just in case he needed it for an emergency.

 

He opened the small, black phone only to see that he had one hundred and fifty two missed calls, sixty four voicemail messages, and three hundred and two text messages. “Holy shit.” His eye twitched in irritation. At that point in time, he wanted nothing more than to throw the damned thing under a bus, but he thought better of it. He began to look at all of the missed calls, wondering if any were from Shuichi. He frowned when he finally made it to the end and none where from his lover. That meant none of the voicemails would be from Shuichi either. He sighed and proceeded to check his texts. He almost gave up hope when he only saw messages from Touma and Mika, but instead he froze when he found one message that Shuichi sent two days ago.

 

 

Touma was right, I should have stayed away from you.

It doesn't matter now, however.

It is already too late for me.

Goodbye…forever.

 

With tears in his eyes, Yuki hurriedly closed the message and dialed Shuichi's number. Every ring sent panic throughout his body. Surely he couldn't have committed suicide, could he? He was on the verge of a nervous breakdown when someone picked up on the other end.

 

“Hello?” a male voice said. It was too deep to be Shuichi's.

 

“Where the hell is Shuichi?!” Yuki screamed into the phone, frantic.

 

“Ah…it's you. Heed my warning, don't ever call this phone again, and if you know what's good for you, you will stay in New York,” the male threatened before hanging up.

 

Yuki tried calling the number again. After several rings, the voice that he longed to hear finally answered with a loud, obnoxious: “Well, hi…!”

 

“Shuichi, I-”

 

“-Sorry that I missed your call, but if you would leave your name and a brief mess-”

 

Yuki clicked his phone closed, hanging up. He couldn't bear to hear the rest of it. What if Shuichi did kill himself and whoever answered blamed him for it? Hell, if Shuichi did take his life he would blame himself, too. He shook his head in hopes of dispelling the thought. Shuichi is still alive… he had to be.

 

Yuki refused to give up. He took a few deep breathes to calm himself, and then opened his phone again. He dialed another number. After one ring, the unusually alarmed voice of the most annoying male answered.

 

“Eiri! Are you okay?!” Touma Seguchi yelled into the phone, causing Yuki to flinch from the volume. “We've been calling and everything. Why didn't you pick up?”

 

“Can it, Seguchi. Shuichi left me a rather disturbing text message and you were mentioned in it. What the hell did you do to him?!” Yuki yelled highly upset.

 

“What did I do to him? I didn't do anything,” Touma answered in his usual innocent, eerie voice.

 

“Then why did he say that you told him to stay away from me?!” Yuki yelled back, not believing Touma's lies.

 

“I told him that to protect you. Because of him, you fell ill. Because of him, you remembered your past. Because of him-”

 

“Bullshit! Shuichi didn't do anything wrong! You better not have done anything to him Seguchi! You hear me! Leave him alone! Everything that happened was all Kitazawa's fault! Leave Shuichi out of it! You had no business to go and tell him to stay away from me in the first place! I'm coming back for Shuichi, and if I find out that you did anything to Shu-”

 

“There is nothing to worry about, Eiri. Shuichi is fine,” Touma interrupted in a calm voice. Yuki breathed a sigh of relief briefly before tensing up. Shuichi was alive, but something bad was going on, the text message said it all. He needed to get home, quick. “Eiri? Eiri?” Touma's voice stopped his thoughts.

 

“We are not finished with this conversation,” Yuki said before hanging up on a still talking Touma.

 

He had more important problems to deal with, and Touma was on his shit list.

 

0-0

 

“Shindo, the president would like to see you,” Mr. Sakano said as he barged into the recording studio causing the vocalist to walk away from the microphone that he was positioned at.

 

“Shu, what kind of trouble did you get yourself into this time?” Hiro asked turning to his best friend who was now standing beside him.

 

“Shit,” K muttered under his breath, attracting Hiro's attention.

 

“I didn't do anything. I wonder why he wants me,” Shuchi replied as he continued towards the door. Some one grabbed his shoulder from behind, making him stop.

 

“Don't worry about this, I'll take care of it,” K said as he past the pink haired vocalist.

 

“Shindo…what did you do?!” Mr. Sakano yelled after K left and closed the door.

 

“Honestly, Mr. Sakano, I don't know,” Shuichi replied in a calm voice.

 

During the small talk, Hiro slipped out of the room undetected.

 

0-0

 

“Mr. K, wait up!” Hiro yelled, running up to the American who stopped and turned towards him.

 

“Yes, what is it, Nakano?” K questioned.

 

“That call that came through on Shuichi's cell, it was Yuki wasn't it?” Hiro asked when he caught up to the blonde.

 

“It was. Shuichi just underwent the hypnotization successfully, and he is already improving in his music. I'll be damned if I let Yuki ruin all of that now. You and I both know how tragic that call could have been. In just a day, we both have seen improvement. He doesn't even remember Yuki anymore,” K said while walking; Hiro fell into step.

 

“I know; it's a good thing that you got to his phone before he did. What did you say to Yuki?” Hiro asked looking up at the taller man.

 

“I told him to stay away from Shindo.”

 

“Which pissed him off and made him call Seguchi, and now Seguchi wants to blame Shuichi,” Hiro said with a troubled expression.

 

“It seems that way. Five minutes haven't even passed since I hung up with Yuki and Seguchi suddenly wants Shindo out of the blue. Here, destroy this, will ya? Tell Shuichi that it's broken and he needs a new one, and a new number,” K said. He then handed Hiro Shuichi's cell phone.

 

Hiro nodded and took the phone from K. “Good luck up there,” Hiro said before turning and walking back towards the studio. Shuichi came out of the studio door.

 

“Hey man, what's up?” Hiro asked, raising his eyebrow at the vocalist.

 

“Going to the restroom,” Shuichi replied, walking in the opposite direction of where K had previously headed. Hiro stared after him for some time before turning to open the studio door.

 

0-0

 

K opened the door to Touma's office without knocking, only to be met by Touma's phone conversation.

 

“No, he is alright... Yes, I'm about to get to the bottom of that now… No, you do not need to come up here, I can handle it… Yes, he is coming home… Ok, bye.” Touma hung up the phone and looked at K with dismay.

 

“Mr. K, I believe that I asked Shindo to come, and quite frankly, you don't look like Shindo,” Touma said in his calm, pure voice that held hidden venom.

 

“I have come to inform you about something,” K said, walking up to take a seat. With an annoyed sigh, Touma nodded for K to continue.

 

“You win… Shuichi will no longer interfere with Yuki,” K said playing it safe, even though he knew that is not what Seguchi wanted.

 

Touma glared at K and frowned, “Mr. K, I appreciate your efforts to try and protect your vocalist, but I'm afraid there is no lie that you can come up with to cover for his mistakes.”

 

“I'm not lying. Yesterday, Hiroshi and I took him to a hypnotist, and as of yesterday, Shuichi doesn't even remember Yuki. I can get the official papers for how the procedure went and everything,” K replied with a smirk as Touma's glare hardened.

 

“If that is true then why did I just receive a phone call from Eiri? Why did he say that Shuichi sent him a text message? Thanks to your vocalist, Eiri is upset,” Touma said with a frown.

 

“If Shuichi did send him this message then it had to be before yesterday. Anyways I want Yuki to stay away from Shuichi, got that?” K said boldly.

 

“Before now I have agreed with that statement, but as of now, I disagree,” Touma said, averting his gaze to his desk.

 

“You what?!” K stood, slamming his hands on the desk.

 

“I disagree. Eiri is coming for Shuichi, and although I do not agree with their union, I will not deny Eiri anything. He was very upset with me for interfering with their relationship,” Touma said, looking back up at K with defiance in his eyes.

 

K scowled at the other man. “There is no way that I am allowing Yuki to mess up Shuichi's new mindset. In just one day, so far, Shuichi has written and recorded two songs. With this type of acceleration he will be on top of the world in less than a year, give or take.”

 

“I'm afraid that you have no choice.”

 

“We will just see about that,” K growled.

 

“I assure you, Mr. K, that if you do anything that causes Eiri displeasure, I will personally myself guarantee that you are unable to do so again,” Touma said with a smile that caused K to shiver.

 

“Is that a threat?” K said with menace laced into his voice.

 

“Take it which ever way that like. You shouldn't interfere with business that doesn't pertain to you.” K's hand twitched to reach for his gun, but he stayed in control. Without another word K stormed out of the office.

 

0-0

 

Fujisaki turned expectantly to Hiro when the door to the studio closed from his arrival, waiting for an explanation. Something was going on behind his back and Hiro and K was just too suspicious. When Hiro ignored him, he broke the silence. “Mr. Nakano, Shuichi has been very motivated today, and he even seems more focused. It's almost as if he is a whole new person. What happened while he was out for the week?” Fujisaki asked.

 

“You're quite the observer. I was meaning to tell you about the whole situation sooner. He doesn't remember Yuki. Don't even mention Yuki or try to bring anything about him up to Shuichi,” Hiro explained.

 

“What do you mean he doesn't remember Yuki?!” Mr. Sakano asked hysterically. “Bad Luck's fame and success! We're ruined!”

 

Hiro smiled. “Well, yesterday…”

 

“No! No excuses!” Fujisaki yelled, causing the taller man to smirk.

 

“We took Shuichi to a hypnotist to get his memories of Yuki removed,” Hiro said bluntly.

 

“But…what about the band?” Mr. Sakano asked on the verge of fainting.

 

“How the hell can you two just go and interfere with somebody's life like that?! That was clearly unethical!” Fujisaki yelled up at the guitarist.

 

“Shuichi was depressed, and he was refusing to come into work, so we did what was best for his well being and for the band. Besides, he asked us to do it, and we don't need Yuki for publicity,” Hiro said, causing Mr. Sakano to faint.

 

“Well since you put it that way…it's still not right, but I can't complain,” Fujisaki admitted with defeat. “Wait… how are we going to keep it like this? Shuichi and Yuki are plastered all over the media. Didn't you think for one second that he could see a picture or video with him and Yuki and question `When was that and who is that?'”

 

“We did think about that, and that's why we have to keep him away from anything that might trigger his memories,” Hiro said with a smirk.

 

“You and K are just impossible…why do I even bother?” Fujisaki said, hanging his head. “Aren't you supposed to be babysitting him right now? What if he is watching the news?”

 

0-0

 

Shuichi stood in front of the large mirror in the bathroom, staring at his reflection. He squinted his eyes and turned his head from side to side. He frowned and ran a hand through his loud, pink hair. He then began to ruffle his hair. After he was finished messing up his hair, he sighed. Something had to change about his look; it was just too immature now.

 

“Shuichi?!” Hiro's voice came from outside the door. “Are you okay in there, Shu?”

 

“Yes, Hiro, I'll be right out,” Shuichi yelled back. He waited until he heard Hiro's footsteps walk away before turning back to the mirror. After analyzing his style a few more times, he smiled. His life was good: no problems and no worries. He was doing great in his music career, and everything was looking up for him. He couldn't remember a time where he was flowing with this much creativity for his music. He usually had writer's block, and now it all seemed so distant. He couldn't imagine why he wasn't this productive as before.

 

With a renewed burst of unknown energy, Shuichi left the bathroom and headed towards the studio. He saw K begin to enter, so he started running, eager to see what happened with Touma. He made it to the door and walked in, undetected by the room's occupants.

 

“We have a problem,” K said in a low voice.

 

“What did Mr. Seguchi say?” Hiro asked.

 

“Yuki is coming back, and he wants Shuichi. He told Tou-” Shuichi interrupted what his manager had to say.

 

“Who is this Yuki? And what does he want with me?”

 

Chapter End

 

Story notes: It is about 8pm in New York, and it is about 1pm in Japan in this chapter.

 

Too much Yuki? Too little Shuichi? Too long of a chapter? Not long enough? Too much tension? Tell me what you think of this chapter. Reviews are highly appreciated, and they motivate me to no end. Thanks for reading.