Gravitation Fan Fiction ❯ New Beginnings ❯ Chapter 3 ( Chapter 3 )
[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]
By: teartrax 
Yuki finally makes it to the hospital.
Anime/Manga: Gravitation Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Drama / Romance / Angst | Type: Alternate Universe | Uploaded On: 02.05.2006 | Updated On: 03.14.2007 | Pages: 2 | Words: 1.6K | Visits: 532 | Status: Work In Progress
Yuki finally makes it to the hospital.
Anime/Manga: Gravitation Fan Fiction | Genre(s): Drama / Romance / Angst | Type: Alternate Universe | Uploaded On: 02.05.2006 | Updated On: 03.14.2007 | Pages: 2 | Words: 1.6K | Visits: 532 | Status: Work In Progress
Disclaimer: I do not own Gravitation, it belongs to the fantastic and talented Maki Murakami.
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Chapter Three
Yuki (POV)
As soon as I left my apartment this morning I’ve been cursing myself at the way I treated Shuichi. I’ve noticed that he’s changed ever since he quit Bad Luck two years ago. That was a shock when he told me about it. I never thought he would give up on his singing, it’s his passion in life.
But I supported him. Well, in my own way I did. I’ve felt him slipping away from me, but I haven’t done anything about it. I’m trying to change, but it’s hard. I always think something’s going to happen and he’s going to stop loving me.
So I decided to do something about it. I know I promised to spend some time with him today, but I arranged to meet with Tohma. After lunch we went shopping and I bought an engagement ring. It’s a gold band with three pink stones. I know its short notice but I booked a function room at the best hotel for tomorrow, where I‘m going to propose to him. I’ve already phoned everyone to make sure they’ll be there, except Tatsuha and Ryuichi. I couldn’t get hold of them, no doubt there out together somewhere.
But that’s okay, I can phone him later. Next we stopped off at the florists where I bought twelve red roses. I want to take him back something to apologise for tonight. Tohma’s been very nice today. He hasn’t been annoying, or trying to talk me out of it. I guess he’s finally accepted that I love him, and I do.
I know I treat him like shit, but I’m going to change. Its time for a new beginning. At about 6pm, Tohma dropped me off at my apartment. After saying goodbye and thank you, I got out of his car and made my way inside.
I knew something was wrong as soon as I stepped through the door. There was spots of blood on the floor. Without taking my shoes off, I walk into the front room. When I put the flowers on the table, I see a gun laying on the floor.
A look at the couch shows me a patch of blood.
“Shuichi.” I call, as I search the apartment.
There’s no sign of him, or any of his stuff. I go back into the front room and piece of paper on the floor catches my attention. I pick it up, and read it.
Yuki
I’m sorry I couldn’t make you happy. I’m sorry you have to find me this way, but it’s the only thing I can think of doing. I know I can’t leave, I have nothing and no one. My life has changed, but I don’t like how it’s changed. I can’t go on, not anymore. My life is over. It was over the day I met you. I know you never loved me. But that’s fine. Don’t blame yourself, it just wasn’t meant to be.
Remember I’ll always love you. And I hope you find the happiness I couldn’t give you.
Shu
The paper falls out of my hand and flutters to the floor. The light from the answering machine catches my attention. I walk over and press the button.
“Aniki, where the hell are you…come down to the hospital as soon as you get this message, it’s Shuichi…”
I don’t bother listening to the rest, I leave my apartment and make my way out. Tohma’s car pulls up, and I don’t waste time asking him why he’s here, or how he knows. I just get in the passenger seat, and he drives to the hospital.
My mind is in a whirl. Why would Shuichi want to kill himself? I know I’m not the easiest person to live with, but am I really that bad? Please Kami-sama, let him be all right. I promise I’ll never treat him like shit again, if you grant this one wish.
I was already willing to change for him. I was planning to commit myself to him in a permanent way.
When Tohma parks his car, we make our way into the hospital. The sight I’m greeted with scares the shit out of me. Ayaka’s holding Hiro, and I can hear him crying. Sakano’s on the floor, out cold. Fujisaki and K are standing like statues with unreadable expressions on their faces.
It’s Tatsuha’s face that shocks me the most, he looks so lost. His face is pale and his body is trembling. Ryuichi’s crying and he’s got his arms around Tatsuha.
“Tatsuha.” I call as Tohma and I make our way towards the group.
He turns to look at me and I don’t like the look on his face. His eyes move from side to side, looking at Tohma and me. I don’t know what’s he’s thinking. I see his body begin to tremble, his face a mask of anger.
“Where the hell have you been? Out fucking somewhere? I can’t believe you! You’re a worthless piece of shit, and I’m ashamed to call you my brother!” He turns away and starts walking down the corridor.
The silence is so thick, you could probably cut it with a knife. The others are looking at me, wondering if what Tatsuha said was true. Why the fuck does he think I’m cheating on Shuichi? I can’t believe he said he was ashamed to call me his brother. I clench my fists and make my way after him, but Ryuichi’s hand on my arm stops me.
“Yuki-san, don’t pay any attention to what he said…he was the one who found Shuichi. I think he’s in shock.”Oh Kami-sama, how could I forget Shuichi?
“What happened?”
I listen as Ryuichi tells me what happened. I swallow a painful lump in my throat. My Shuichi tried to kill himself. Was he really that unhappy with me? I close my eyes and picture what he wrote. He said he loved me. I wish I had told him I loved him, instead of always shutting him out. If only I had planned this earlier, maybe it would have turned out differently. And now my Shuichi is in there fighting for his life.
A thump brings us all out of our thoughts. We look round to see Tatsuha on the floor. We make our way over, as a couple of doctors pick him up off the floor and place him on a stretcher, and wheel him into a spare cubicle.
A young nurse checks to make sure he’s all right.
“He’s okay, he just fainted.” She says as she leaves.
I stand by the bed and take my brothers hand. His eyes open and he meets my eyes. Tears make there way down his cheeks.
“I’m sorry aniki, I didn’t mean what I said…I was so afraid. When I saw Shuichi slumped against the couch, I thought he was dead. The blood on his shirt, the gun on the floor. I heard the gun shot…I don’t think I’m ever going to be able to get that image out of my head…”
I pull him into a hug as he starts to cry. His whole body shaking. I’ve never seen my brother like this, not even when we were little.
“Excuse me.”
We break apart to see a doctor standing in front of us.
“We managed to get Mr Shindou’s heart beating again, but he’s still in a coma…you can sit with him if you want…try talking to him, it might help.”We all make our way into Shuichi’s room. I stand by the side of his bed. His body looks so tiny in the bed, his body covered with a blue blanket. His face looks pale. I take his hand and raise it to my face, placing a kiss on his knuckles.
“Why did you do this Shuichi? Why did you want to leave me? I know I’ve been a bastard to you, but I’m trying.” I don’t know if he can hear me, but I just talk to him. “I even planned on asking you to marry me. That’s why I couldn’t spend time with you today. Tohma and I went shopping, I got you an engagement ring…I also planned to throw you a party tomorrow night…I wanted everything to be perfect…why Shuichi? Why did you do this?” I start to sob.
“Because I didn’t think you loved me.”
My head snaps up to find big purple eyes staring at me. My sobs grow louder, my hand clenches his. I’m vaguely aware of someone racing out of the room, but my attention stays on Shuichi. I lean my forehead against his. I watch as he lifts his hand to my face, and wipes my tears away.
--
Chapter Three
Yuki (POV)
As soon as I left my apartment this morning I’ve been cursing myself at the way I treated Shuichi. I’ve noticed that he’s changed ever since he quit Bad Luck two years ago. That was a shock when he told me about it. I never thought he would give up on his singing, it’s his passion in life.
But I supported him. Well, in my own way I did. I’ve felt him slipping away from me, but I haven’t done anything about it. I’m trying to change, but it’s hard. I always think something’s going to happen and he’s going to stop loving me.
So I decided to do something about it. I know I promised to spend some time with him today, but I arranged to meet with Tohma. After lunch we went shopping and I bought an engagement ring. It’s a gold band with three pink stones. I know its short notice but I booked a function room at the best hotel for tomorrow, where I‘m going to propose to him. I’ve already phoned everyone to make sure they’ll be there, except Tatsuha and Ryuichi. I couldn’t get hold of them, no doubt there out together somewhere.
But that’s okay, I can phone him later. Next we stopped off at the florists where I bought twelve red roses. I want to take him back something to apologise for tonight. Tohma’s been very nice today. He hasn’t been annoying, or trying to talk me out of it. I guess he’s finally accepted that I love him, and I do.
I know I treat him like shit, but I’m going to change. Its time for a new beginning. At about 6pm, Tohma dropped me off at my apartment. After saying goodbye and thank you, I got out of his car and made my way inside.
I knew something was wrong as soon as I stepped through the door. There was spots of blood on the floor. Without taking my shoes off, I walk into the front room. When I put the flowers on the table, I see a gun laying on the floor.
A look at the couch shows me a patch of blood.
“Shuichi.” I call, as I search the apartment.
There’s no sign of him, or any of his stuff. I go back into the front room and piece of paper on the floor catches my attention. I pick it up, and read it.
Yuki
I’m sorry I couldn’t make you happy. I’m sorry you have to find me this way, but it’s the only thing I can think of doing. I know I can’t leave, I have nothing and no one. My life has changed, but I don’t like how it’s changed. I can’t go on, not anymore. My life is over. It was over the day I met you. I know you never loved me. But that’s fine. Don’t blame yourself, it just wasn’t meant to be.
Remember I’ll always love you. And I hope you find the happiness I couldn’t give you.
Shu
The paper falls out of my hand and flutters to the floor. The light from the answering machine catches my attention. I walk over and press the button.
“Aniki, where the hell are you…come down to the hospital as soon as you get this message, it’s Shuichi…”
I don’t bother listening to the rest, I leave my apartment and make my way out. Tohma’s car pulls up, and I don’t waste time asking him why he’s here, or how he knows. I just get in the passenger seat, and he drives to the hospital.
My mind is in a whirl. Why would Shuichi want to kill himself? I know I’m not the easiest person to live with, but am I really that bad? Please Kami-sama, let him be all right. I promise I’ll never treat him like shit again, if you grant this one wish.
I was already willing to change for him. I was planning to commit myself to him in a permanent way.
When Tohma parks his car, we make our way into the hospital. The sight I’m greeted with scares the shit out of me. Ayaka’s holding Hiro, and I can hear him crying. Sakano’s on the floor, out cold. Fujisaki and K are standing like statues with unreadable expressions on their faces.
It’s Tatsuha’s face that shocks me the most, he looks so lost. His face is pale and his body is trembling. Ryuichi’s crying and he’s got his arms around Tatsuha.
“Tatsuha.” I call as Tohma and I make our way towards the group.
He turns to look at me and I don’t like the look on his face. His eyes move from side to side, looking at Tohma and me. I don’t know what’s he’s thinking. I see his body begin to tremble, his face a mask of anger.
“Where the hell have you been? Out fucking somewhere? I can’t believe you! You’re a worthless piece of shit, and I’m ashamed to call you my brother!” He turns away and starts walking down the corridor.
The silence is so thick, you could probably cut it with a knife. The others are looking at me, wondering if what Tatsuha said was true. Why the fuck does he think I’m cheating on Shuichi? I can’t believe he said he was ashamed to call me his brother. I clench my fists and make my way after him, but Ryuichi’s hand on my arm stops me.
“Yuki-san, don’t pay any attention to what he said…he was the one who found Shuichi. I think he’s in shock.”Oh Kami-sama, how could I forget Shuichi?
“What happened?”
I listen as Ryuichi tells me what happened. I swallow a painful lump in my throat. My Shuichi tried to kill himself. Was he really that unhappy with me? I close my eyes and picture what he wrote. He said he loved me. I wish I had told him I loved him, instead of always shutting him out. If only I had planned this earlier, maybe it would have turned out differently. And now my Shuichi is in there fighting for his life.
A thump brings us all out of our thoughts. We look round to see Tatsuha on the floor. We make our way over, as a couple of doctors pick him up off the floor and place him on a stretcher, and wheel him into a spare cubicle.
A young nurse checks to make sure he’s all right.
“He’s okay, he just fainted.” She says as she leaves.
I stand by the bed and take my brothers hand. His eyes open and he meets my eyes. Tears make there way down his cheeks.
“I’m sorry aniki, I didn’t mean what I said…I was so afraid. When I saw Shuichi slumped against the couch, I thought he was dead. The blood on his shirt, the gun on the floor. I heard the gun shot…I don’t think I’m ever going to be able to get that image out of my head…”
I pull him into a hug as he starts to cry. His whole body shaking. I’ve never seen my brother like this, not even when we were little.
“Excuse me.”
We break apart to see a doctor standing in front of us.
“We managed to get Mr Shindou’s heart beating again, but he’s still in a coma…you can sit with him if you want…try talking to him, it might help.”We all make our way into Shuichi’s room. I stand by the side of his bed. His body looks so tiny in the bed, his body covered with a blue blanket. His face looks pale. I take his hand and raise it to my face, placing a kiss on his knuckles.
“Why did you do this Shuichi? Why did you want to leave me? I know I’ve been a bastard to you, but I’m trying.” I don’t know if he can hear me, but I just talk to him. “I even planned on asking you to marry me. That’s why I couldn’t spend time with you today. Tohma and I went shopping, I got you an engagement ring…I also planned to throw you a party tomorrow night…I wanted everything to be perfect…why Shuichi? Why did you do this?” I start to sob.
“Because I didn’t think you loved me.”
My head snaps up to find big purple eyes staring at me. My sobs grow louder, my hand clenches his. I’m vaguely aware of someone racing out of the room, but my attention stays on Shuichi. I lean my forehead against his. I watch as he lifts his hand to my face, and wipes my tears away.