Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Contemplation Indigo ❯ Luminary Willow ( Chapter 14 )

Luminary Willow

By DRL

Wufei slowly turned the pages of the book he had come to the library to find, and sighed wistfully as he browsed through the colourful photographs. Since he and Treize had begun their sojourn at the Barton-Winner mansion, this was the third time that had he had felt compelled to seek out the book, and he wondered whether he were developing an obsession. It seemed as though for the past few weeks weddings and marriage had been constantly on his mind. He looked up as he heard the door open and watched as Treize entered and gracefully crossed the room towards him. He instantly took in his husband's smart but casual ensemble of well-cut, flat-fronted trousers in a black, fine wool gabardine and a lightweight cashmere sweater in a deep blood-red colour, and it occurred to him that only Treize could wear such a shade of red with auburn hair and look as stunning as he did.

"Fei, I've been looking for you everywhere." The older man said as he stopped at the sofa Wufei was curled up on and sank to his knees before him, concern etched in every aristocratic feature.

"Not everywhere, obviously." Wufei replied tartly, but without rancour. "Back from your shopping trip so soon?" He asked as he closed the book.

"Well Hugo called me and told me that you were not feeling very well, so I came back. Once I had heard that I didn't have the heart for shopping any more. Are you okay?"

Wufei clicked his tongue impatiently. "Oh Treize," He said testily, "You worry too much, and Hugo doesn't help. It was nothing, just a headache, which two aspirin soon took care of. It's much better now."

"Good, I'm glad to hear it." Treize said as he rose and took a seat on the sofa beside Wufei. "Hugo is only doing his job, and doing it extremely well I might add." He sank back into the plump, down-filled cushions of the comfortable old sofa, and crossed one long leg elegantly over the other. "What on earth are you doing with that?" Wufei followed Treize's gaze and saw that he was staring intently at the book in his hands. "It's Quatre and Trowa's wedding album isn't it?"

"Yes, I er..., I was just looking at it." Wufei stammered, and then made a decision. It was now or never.

"Treize, I wish we could have had one of these, I wish we could have had a proper wedding." As he said this he looked down at the floor, studying the pattern on the rug intently in an attempt to avoid see the expression on Treize's face that he knew his statement would evoke.

Treize stared at Wufei in stunned silence. He opened his mouth to speak, but no words were forthcoming, so he closed it again. He opened it once more, but could say no more than, "Fei, I...," Then words failed him once again. Wufei forced himself to look up at Treize, and saw the desperation in his eyes, like a cornered animal. No, this was not how it was supposed to be. He had not meant to put Treize on the spot, as if he, Wufei, had accused him of something. He quickly put the book down on the small lamp-table beside the sofa, turned towards Treize and drew the older man to him, snaking his arms about his neck and holding him tightly.

"Treize, please don't look like that, I didn't mean anything. I only meant that it would have been nice to have been married to you properly, I mean in front of all our friends and everyone. We never talk about it and we never celebrate our wedding anniversary. I don't even know when our anniversary is, for heaven's sake!" He laughed mirthlessly. "It's almost as though we'd done something wrong that would be best forgotten. I just wish that I had had a wedding day that I could be proud and happy about, just like Quatre and Trowa, or Heero and Duo. I am so proud and happy to be married to you Treize, I just wish I could show that to everyone, rather than acting as if it never happened or as if it were something we should be ashamed of."

Treize disengaged Wufei's arms from around his neck, and manoeuvred their bodies until their eyes met.

"I had no idea you felt like that Fei." He said gravely.

"I didn't really, but I do now." Wufei replied." I never gave it more than just a passing thought until quite recently. In fact, it began when I was in the hospital. Do you remember that awful night when I sent you to away to sleep in the little bedroom, and wound up lying awake most of the night?" Treize nodded, and pulled Wufei gently to him again, laying the younger man's head on his shoulder and cradling the small body in his arms. He was reassured now that he saw that there were no recriminations and that Wufei was not actually angry with him. "Well, to stop myself from getting anxious about being alone, I though about many things that night and our marriage was one of them. It dawned on me that I didn't remember very much about our wedding at all. I don't actually remember much about that whole period of my life and I am mostly grateful for that, but I wish I could remember our wedding. It was such an important event in my life that changed it in so many wonderful ways. It just seems a shame that I have no memory of it."

"Do you remember anything about it at all?" Treize prompted gently.

"No, not much, I'm sorry." Wufei replied.

"Well I'll tell you about it if you like," Treize offered, "Only let's go upstairs. It's a long story and it's quite likely that we'll be interrupted if we stay here."

Wufei reverently replaced the wedding album in its cabinet, and he and Treize went upstairs to their room as they always did if they did not feel particularly sociable for one reason or another. They knew that they would not be disturbed either by their hosts or by the servants until they either requested attendance or emerged of their own accord, nor would they have to make any excuses. When they reached the bedroom Wufei, in a boisterous and playful mood, insisted that despite it being early afternoon, they snuggle together in bed, beneath the bedclothes but still fully clothed.

"So, where would you like me to start?" Treize asked as toyed lovingly with Wufei's hair. He lay on his back with Wufei's small body pressed close against him, one thin arm thrown across Treize's body and his head tucked beneath his chin. One leg, crooked at the knee, rested against Treize's thigh.

"Well I'll tell you what I remember, and you can fill in from there." Wufei replied. "I remember you coming to get me from the temple. By the way, how did you know even know I was there?" Treize laughed insouciantly.

"I may not have wielded the military or political power I once did at that time, but I was not completely bereft of intelligence sources." He said. "I knew exactly where all of you were and what you were doing. At first I thought that you might come looking for me after the war, but when you didn't, I went looking for you. As soon as I heard you had entered the Shaolin Temple I went there immediately to get you out. I was not about to let you waste your life as a Buddhist monk."

"I didn't know what I was going to do. I was so confused at that time." Wufei said quietly.

"Why did you not come to me Fei?" Treize asked gently, "I thought we meant something to each other."

"So did I Treize," Wufei said with mounting fervour, "But think about it. A secret relationship during the war was one thing, but how could we possibly be together in peacetime? An ex-terrorist and His Excellency General Kushrenada? I couldn't see any future in it and I felt sure that you wouldn't either, so I went to the temple to meditate and think things out. Only it didn't quite work out that way." This last sentence he added in a mellower tone.

"No indeed." Treize said dryly. "I still shudder when I think what might have happened to you in that place had I not arrived when I did. You were well in the throes of a mental breakdown and no-one in the temple seems to have noticed. I still can't believe it." He said with passion.

"Don't judge them too harshly Treize." Wufei said soothingly. "It's exactly the kind of place where someone with the kind of problems I had can hide out very easily. That could be why I went there, I don't know. I think I would have ended up killing myself." He added slowly. "I remember that I thought about it a lot. I just couldn't see any reason not to."

"Not even me?" Treize asked quietly. Wufei raised himself up onto one elbow so that he looked Treize directly in the eye.

"Don't you see, you were my main reason for doing it?" He said earnestly. "Life without you would have been no life at all, so I didn't see what else there was for me to do. You had disappeared by that time, and when the war ended I just assumed that you would pick up the threads of your 'grand' life, in which I could see no place for an ex-terrorist gundam pilot."

Treize was extremely uncomfortable with where the conversation was going, but he had to admit that Wufei was right. They were completely open about everything else in their relationship, but this period in their lives was a closed book. They had never discussed it, although this was not by design, at least not on Treize's part. He had taken his cue from Wufei, and since Wufei had never mentioned it and seemed content to remain silent on the matter, he had done the same. The doctor that had helped Wufei through the deep depression he had sunk into after the war had actually advised Treize that this might happen with certain episodes in the young man's life as a result of post-traumatic stress, so Treize was content to let it go at that - until now.

Although Wufei seemed quite calm as they talked, if a little intense, Treize was keeping a weather-eye open for signs of distress. Some of the memories Wufei was recounting were not all that pleasant, and he was reluctant to let the younger man's mind dwell on such things. He could also see though, that Wufei was determined to have everything out in the open at last, and he grudgingly admitted that this was no bad thing. The clandestine nature of the events surrounding their marriage had weighed heavily upon him for many years, and if the truth be told he was relieved to finally be able to talk openly about them. He gently lowered Wufei's head to his chest again and gave him an affectionate squeeze.

"Silly boy." He said with good humour. "Still, I can see why you might have thought that. What you failed to take into account though, is that being His Excellency Treize Kushrenada, I can do whatever the hell I like, and everyone else can either like it, or lump it."

"Yes, I am well aware of that now." Wufei acknowledged with a light laugh.

"Anyway Fei, let me tell you about our wedding, and why it had to be the way it was." Treize said gravely. "Firstly, let me assure you that in no way were you forced or coerced into anything. Everything you did, you did of your own free will, or as much will as you had anyway." He added in an undertone.

"I know that Treize." Wufei looked up at him with an affectionate smile, and stroked his cheek lightly. "I remember you proposing to me. 'Marry me and I'll take care of you' you said. I don't remember my answer, but I must have said yes, because you are too honourable a man to have married me otherwise."

"Thank-you for that my pet." Treize said, and pressed a light but fervent kiss to his husband's smooth brow. "You did say yes, and the wedding was hastily arranged. It had to be that way because of your mental condition. You see, when I took you from the temple, I knew that something was very wrong with you, and it was probably more mental that physical. I took you to Switzerland to see a top psychiatric specialist and he diagnosed severe clinical depression, with one or two minor complications thrown in for good measure. He warned me that you were a high suicide risk, and that you needed immediate treatment. However, as you were still considered a minor, you could not enter his facility of your own volition. You could only be placed there by a parent, a guardian or a spouse. So the only way I could get you in there was to adopt you or marry you. As I had every intention of marrying you anyway, I simply brought the whole thing forward. I obtained a special marriage license and we were married at a discreet ceremony in a registrars office in Geneva, after which, you went straight into the clinic. The whole thing took no more than 3 days to arrange, from start to finish. This will make you laugh," Treize added with a wry grin, "We didn't even consummate our marriage until a good six or seven months later, when you came out of the clinic." Wufei did indeed laugh, most heartily.

"I think I remember the ceremony." He said at length. "I remember a small room, a man in a suit with a book in his hand, and two other men who were complete strangers to me - witnesses I expect."

"They might have been strangers to you then, but you know both of them quite well now." Treize said.

"Really?" Wufei raised his head to meet Treize's steely gaze, which sparkled with merriment. "Who were they?" He asked.

"One was Jarvis and the other was de Villeforte." Wufei's eyes widened with incredulity. He knew both men extremely well. Jarvis was Treize's loyal and devoted Private Secretary, and de Villeforte was their faithful old retainer at the 18th Century chateau in South-West France that was the couple's main residence. "I had to use people that I could trust because the whole thing had to remain secret, at least for the time being, until you were well again."

"Oh!" Wufei exclaimed with delight, "I'm so glad" He lowered his head to Treize's chest again and held him tightly, "I'm so glad it wasn't strangers, that it was people I know, people we know. It makes it just that little bit more like being married properly, in front of friends."

"Is that so important to you my sweet?" Treize asked gently.

"Yes...," Wufei began, then he shook his head decisively. "No, it isn't, well at least it shouldn't be. We are married, and that should be the important thing, right?" He said, speaking like a man trying hard to convince himself. "It doesn't really matter. I probably only want it because I can't have it. You know what they say, the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence."

"Who says you can't have it?" Treize said with mock indignation. "You're forgetting who it is you are married to." He continued grandly. "As the consort of His Excellency Treize Kushrenada, you can have anything and everything you want. Whatever my Wufei wants, my Wufei gets."

"What do you mean?" Wufei said, his confusion tinged with hope, "How?"

"We'll simply do it all again. We'll renew our vows in the grandest, most lavish ceremony your imagination can devise, and you can invite God almighty if you have a mind to, or in your case perhaps Buddah or...?" His words were abruptly curtailed by Wufei's lips upon his in a searing kiss.

"Treize Kushrenada, you are the most wonderful man in the whole world!" Wufei said exuberantly, as he clasped Treize to him, crushing the breath from the older man's body. "Thank-you so much." He claimed Treize's lips again in another kiss, this time with a little less frenzy, and rather more passion. Wufei broke the kiss and lay his head fondly on Treize's chest, his fingers idly tracing light patterns on the soft fabric of his husband's sweater. "Can we really do this, legally I mean?" He asked. "Won't we be committing bigamy of some kind or something?" This elicited a light laugh from Treize.

"Of course we can do it my pet." He replied. "It will be your show though, so I will leave all the arrangements to you, but I will ask Jarvis to come over to take care of the details. Simply pick a date, and take it from there."

"I already know the date I want." Wufei said quietly, loosening his arms about Treize's body, and raising his head so that their eyes connected. "Well, I don't actually know it but..."

"It was the 24th April." Treize supplied, anticipating his husband's next question. Wufei smiled at him and gave him another brief kiss.

"And we'll celebrate our anniversary on that day every single year from now on, to make up for the past thirteen years." He said happily.

"Fourteen." Treize corrected, but Wufei was not listening. His eyes had suddenly widened in horror.

"The 24th April? That means that I only have three months, almost to the day!" He threw back the bedclothes and scrambled to his feet. "Oh my god, that's no time at all. Come on Treize, phone Jarvis and tell him he has to get over here right away." He tugged impatiently at his husband's sleeve. "I have so much to do and so little time, perhaps I should hire a wedding planner? I'll ask Jarvis to find a good one."

"Oh dear, what have I started." Treize muttered as he slowly hauled himself upright and rose, smoothing the creases from his trousers with the palm of his hand.

A half an hour later, the call to Jarvis duly accomplished, they had both repaired to the Barton-Winner mansion bar, Treize finding himself in dire need of fortified liquid refreshment. Treize toyed with his second glass of vintage Armagnac as Wufei sipped from a glass of Perrier water. They sat side by side on stools at the bar, both staring pensively into their glasses. Wufei broke the companionable silence.

"Treize?"

"Hmmm?"

"You remember you told me that we didn't consummate our marriage until I came out of the clinic, what was it, seven months later?"

"Mmhmm?"

"Why not? I assume that we must have spent at least one night together before you packed me off to the clinic." Treize sighed heavily, swirled the brandy around his glass one last time, threw his head back and tipped the amber liquid down his throat before replying.

"Terrible as it may sound, we actually didn't. I didn't want to make love to you that night, so I deliberately arranged things so that you went into the clinic hours after we got married."

"Why?" Wufei demanded vehemently, righteous indignation and downright anger welling up within him in equal measure. Treize hesitated before replying, using the pause to pour himself another generous measure of the fine brandy.

"To tell you the absolute truth, it was because, it would be easier for an annulment to be granted if the marriage was never consummated." He said in a monotone, looking down at the granite surface of the bar. "As I told you, you married me when the balance of your mind was unsound. Although you did agree at the time, I wanted to leave a way open for you, should you change your mind at a later date, such as when you left the clinic, fully recovered. A divorce would have had too many implications for both me and you, so an annulment was better, just as if the thing had never been." Wufei reached out and entwined his fingers with Treize's as the older man's hand rested on his gabardine-clad knee.

"As I said, a very honourable man." He said and gave it an affectionate squeeze.