Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Crossover ❯ Severus Snape ( Chapter 6 )

Chapter 6

Albus is going to pay, this I solemnly swear. It's not as if he will miss a couple of fingers, right!?

That bumbling old coot knew about this, he had to!! He always knows everything and, above all, he knows how much I hate children!!

Why, oh why did he have to send me of all people in this stupid "pick up some more brats for us to teach" mission!?

Hooch (damn the woman!!) fell asleep an hour into this wretched flight, leaving me to deal with all the little hell-spawns. Fifteen minutes later I was ready to wring all of their collective necks and to heel with the consequences. And that was long before that braid-totting maniac made his presence known by making the sword-totting psycho (oh, hell. Now they come armed to school!!) chase him around while shrieking like a bloody banshee.

Tying and gagging them didn't work, they were back at it less than five minutes later (how they escaped, don't ask me. At least I had taken away the sword). The ex-sword-totting idiot was soon joined by two other boys: one of them sported the weirdest hairdo I've ever seen (and, living in close proximity to Albus Dumbledore, that is saying a lot) and a blonde boy that was screaming at the top of his lungs that they shouldn't kill him.

For a second, I felt like joining them. Only I would have screamed for them to kill him as slowly and painfully as possible. Even better if they could get Sirius Black to suffer accordingly. Hell, I'd even help them hide the bodies!! Now, there was a very fine deal!!

Ugh, as if dealing with the dream team (Potter and his tag-alongs) and Malfoy (cronies included) wasn't enough, now I'm going to have to deal with those… those… Oh, bloody hell!! Now I can't even think of an adjective that fits!! There simply isn't anything nasty and/or sarcastic enough to describe them!!

Albus shall better beware. He isn't just going to pay. He will suffer!! He will die!!

Darn. This is the part where I'm supposed to cackle madly, isn't it!? Damn that stupid werewolf and his comics. Manga, he calls them. If I didn't know better I'd think they were bewitched to force people to keep on reading them… and then for annoying quotes from them to pop up at the most bizarre of moments. Grrr, I'm never again reading something that the furball recommends. Well, at least now I know how he kept himself so perky during Albus' meetings (more like monologues). Most probably he was laughing in his head at the annoying quotes that seem to find it funny to pop up at the most bizarre times during the old man's speeches. They make it goddamn near impossible not to laugh, let alone keep a straight face!!

Hmm… I've been mussing for a really long time, haven't I? I can feel my subconscious trying to kick my brain into gear. It seems to believe that I've forgotten something. Me!! As if.

Even so, it's becoming annoying. I make my decision and stand up. A look around reveals that everything is normal. Just a bunch of children chatting about (semi) peacefully.

I all but snarl at my subconscious. I haven't forgotten anything. Everything is fine. Now, could I go back to minding my own business!? And yet the stupid thing insists that something is wrong. What's more, it's becoming frantic.

I'm about to chew it alive (metaphorically speaking) when I hear the loudest crash I've heard in my life. My mind immediately panics: crash+spacecraft=trouble. Lights begin to flash everywhere, emergency ones. I'm surprised to see how calmly the children react: they all pull their spacesuits from underneath their seats and step into them, each of them checks that their neighbor has adjusted his/hers and then they check if anyone else is having any trouble.

I take my cue from them (hell, this is my first space flight, we apparated to the shuttle port) and pulled mine on. Hooch was awake now and was doing the same.

A few minutes go by while we wait to learn what has happened (with my brain still screaming at me), until finally a flight attendant appears to inform us that it was a false alarm and to ask Hooch and I to follow her. We do so, and soon find ourselves in the small crew compartment at the end of the ship, where the four stooges have been locked.

Ok, so I had forgotten about them. It seems the psycho had found a weapon after all: a pipe (God knows where he got it) and, during their antics, managed to damage the pressurization controls of the passenger cabin.

Ok, Albus isn't the only one that will die as soon as we arrive at Hogwarts.

Bloody hell, with my luck, this four will be Gryffindors!!!