Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Dear Sally ❯ Dear Sally 10/? ( Chapter 10 )

ARG! Finally part 10 has arrived... It would have been up sooner...
BUUUUT...
I was kidnapped over the weekend and taken for an Easter holiday...
To a bloody *FARM*... of all places ^^;;(See ShenLong's Down on the farm)

One of the dogs was freaking black and white in color. No not a collie. Thank god! I would have been guarding my leg like god knows how! Damn chickens weren't laying, so since my hair fringe is just as long as Trowa's, I tried that damn *go lay eggs for me* spiel, but that mission was a total failure... No goose, bull or milking machines either *sighs with relief* Damn you Shenlong this was all your fault you cursed me with this Farm Fic and all I did was look out the window at Sizzlers and
say ooh look isn't that a chicken *Conveniently leaves out parts
about making farm jokes containing the Gundam boys, then makes note,
never to let anyone kidnap her without finding out the destination
first^^;;*

Disclaimer: I do not own the Gundam boys or any other character from the series.

Warnings: There will be Lemon and NC17 (trust me ^_~ )

Pairings: 1+2,1x1, 2x2, 2+H, 1+R, 3x4, 5xS, 6xN, HxR ,1x2x1.

(Authors note If you notice a change in pairing I have changed it from DxR to HxR not even I can bring myself to put Dorothy with Relena. Dorothy creeps me out)

Rating: NC17 occasional fluff.

Author: Ryouga.

Author's note: Thanks to DSM for helping my muses with the door!!

Title: Dear Sally

Dear Sally10/?

" I hereby name the newest member of our home………… Hee-bunny!"

Silence echoed throughout the room. All eyes were focussed on Heero, who's eyes were fixated on Duo, a look of `What the hell?" all over his face.

CRACK.

"WOAH!!!"

THUD.

"SHIT!!!"

Laughter replaced the silence as Heero found himself in a very embarrassing position, head down, on the floor, in the ex-Shinigami's groin. The small table had been reduced to what now could only be considered as firewood. The strain of so much weight on such a small surface had become too much for it to bear.

Duo sat upright smirking, taking immediate advantage of the situation. "Now now Heero, there's plenty of time for that later, we have guests right now!"

Slowly the embarrassed boy lifted himself up onto his arms.' "Hee-bunny??" the boy questioned as he glared ice cold daggers at the one who once called himself the great destroyer.

Duo laughed." What's wrong with Hee-bunny?"

"Hee-bunny.?" The blue-eyed boy repeated again.

Wu Fei moved forward, offering his hand out to Heero, helping the boy up. " You sound like a stuck message recording Yuy. Tell me, does it really surprise you coming from Maxwell?"

"I think Hee-bunny is a sweet name. " Lucrezia grinned

"I'm all for it." Hilde laughed aloud as she helped Duo up from the floor.

Relena moved forward. "Are you two all right?" she asked some what concerned.

Zechs smiled. "I don't think anything could possibly harm those two at all."

"That," Wu Fei began, "…is because they both have hard heads and stubborn streaks."

Sally put an arm around her husband's shoulders. "Sounds like someone else I know." She whispered into his ear and kissing him on the cheek softly.

Wu Fei could feel his face turning a dark shade of crimson red. "Not here, onna." He replied softly glancing around, embarrassed a little, but not ungrateful at Sally's outward display of affection.

"Oh, before I forget," Zechs suddenly announced, " I have your pay checks with me." He opened his briefcase and pulled out some envelopes handing everyone, one; and even Heero managed to stop glaring at the braided baka as each of the crew individually thanked him.

Duo was the first to tear open his envelope and a large grin swept across his face. " When you said bonus Quatre old pal, you were't joking were you?"

"You'd better make sure you get that to the bank first thing in the morning then hadn't you?" the Arabian youth grinned.

"I'll do that; and I'll be singing zippity-doo-dah the entire way.' Duo replied cheerfully, a melodious ring to his voice.

"And I thought music soothed the savage beast?" Trowa smirked a little.

Quatre grinned over at his lover. "Except for in Duo`s case, then, it just happens to be large pay checks!"

Hilde made her way back over to Duo, placing a hand on his shoulder. "Enough with the humor already people. I'm kinda hungry now." She grinned at him.

"Duh! Oh yeah, that's right. "He said grinning back at her." Ok everyone pile into the kitchen, it's munchie time."

Heero watched them leave as Duo led the small group onward, like leading a lamb to slaughter, after all the *god of death* had helped make some of the goodies. He glanced down at the carnage caused by the braided baka and then back towards the kitchen, sighing to himself. "Hee-bunny. "He groaned. "…he named the god damn thing Hee-bunny!!"

In the kitchen Duo had removed the table cloth that had protected the food and Hilde had moved up beside him, staring at a plate of cupcakes that the braided baka had so proudly admitted to making.

"Ok everyone help yourselves to the snacks and don't blame me if you eat these and die." He grinned pointing to the cupcakes. He noticed Hilde still staring at the offending deserts and placing his hands onto his hips stood back a little, grinning. "What_is your problem girl?"

"Die is about right! " She prodded the monstrosities suspiciously. "…are they supposed to be that color?"

"And what's wrong with green cupcakes Hilde my sweet?" the smug one asked curiously with a large grin on his face.

"Exactly they're *green*. What on earth did you do to them?"

"He decided to experiment with food coloring." Heero replied handing the violet-eyed boy the dustpan and broom he had in his hand. "Here put these some place out of the way."

Duo took them and grinned, eyeing the blue-eyed boy's rump as he walked past him opening his mouth to reply.

"Don't even go there, Maxwell. You're entering dangerous territory and besides, Hilde might get jealous!"

"See he does that all the time " the ex-Shinigami laughed.

Hilde laughed and clamped her hand over her mouth. Relena glanced their way as if to say something, but the black-haired girl placed a finger up to her lips and gave the Vice Minister a sly wink. She nodded in understanding of the request, a grin on her face.

"Don't worry Heero, she's only radio active on Thursdays and Mondays." The braided baka continued.

Heero rolled his eyes and shook his head. Where did this guy get his random sense of humor? A second hand comedy store?

"I have news for you Maxwell." Wu Fei cut in.

"Yeah what's that Wo ma-"

The ex 05 pilot glared at the violet-eyed smart-ass, a look that said, `I dare you!' on his face.

"Er… I mean, Wu Fei…" Duo quickly replied changing his chosen course of speech action.

"It's Sunday!" the Chinese man retorted.

"Oh… Ehehehe yeah *sweatdrop* I forgot." Duo sheepishly grinned scratching the back of his head.

Heero sighed. Maybe the braided baka should quit while he was behind. Glancing over at Sally, who was talking to Noin in the far corner of the kitchen, he felt that if he was going to take Trowa's advice it would have to be soon. Although, there seemed nothing much he could do at this point in time. If he suddenly disappeared into his room now, the braided moron would only follow and accuse him of being anti social, demanding that he tell him why he'd chosen solitude in his room rather than socialize with his friends.

That being the case he would have to wait until everyone had left and there was no telling when that would be. Resigned to the fact that he had no choice right now but to be *social* he grabbed a plate and started helping himself to some food.

Occupying space in the opposite corner of the kitchen, Zechs had cornered Trowa and Quatre in conversation.

"Really??" the blonde-haired Arabian boy had gasped. "Hilde is with Relena!? And what does Dorothy think about that?!!?"

"Dorothy thinks?" The taller boy said a little amused by his lover's complacency.

"Doesn't every one? " Quatre replied in all innocence.

Trowa tapped the boy's nose affectionately. " Just stick to being cute and leave the rest to us, lover."

A red patch developed across the youth's face as he searched for a place to hide. "Er I think I'll go get something to drink." He replied softly as he slinked slowly over to the punch bowl.

"I gather then that Heero doesn't know about Hilde and Relena?" Zechs noted, watching the other boy leave.

Trowa grinned a little glancing over at Heero. "No, he has no idea, but, I've sworn Hilde to secrecy. I find it amusing to watch the perfect soldier unravel in his encumbered state of Duo infatuation. There's nothing wrong with a little match making now is there?" Trowa asked mischievously. "And besides the only things Heero doesn't know is that Hilde and Relena are an item or that Duo already started writing into the column two weeks ago."

"You're one step ahead all the way aren't you, Trowa Barton." the platinum blonde said in reply.

"Duo was more than willing to get Heero's attention one way or another. I just gave them the same suggestion and left it up to them to do what they liked about it. Nothing more, nothing less. It's like this, Zechs. Duo is sure that Heero is attracted to Relena and he in return is sure that Duo is attracted to Hilde. So Hilde and I agreed not to let either of them know any different at the moment. Why spoil the fun while this strange relationship unfolds."

"I would very much like to be a fly on the wall when Heero finds out what you're up to." Zechs had to grin. He'd never realized just how much of a devilish streak the boy had in him.

"That may not be the wisest thing to wish for if Heero Yuy isn't in a good mood." Trowa smirked a little. "You'd need to make sure you were on opposite side of the room or your amusement may well be short lived."

A small chuckle resounded from the platinum blonde's lips. "Yes, I can well understand your point." He glanced momentarily at his watch and then over at Noin catching her eye. She nodded as if in confirmation of some unseen command from her lover. "You'll have to excuse me for cutting this short and forgive my abruptness, but Lucrezia, Relena and I have a meeting with Lady Une in half an hour so we must inform Heero and Duo that we need take our leave immediately, if, we are to get there on time."

Trowa nodded his acknowledgment "I understand perfectly, even though we are on down time you, must continue to watch over things."

"A part of keeping the peace includes sacrifice of a lot of things. Time is the most fleeting of all and it needs to be used wisely." Zechs informed him in an almost sage-like manner as he reached for Trowa's hand.

Trowa accepted the offer of the handshake. It was a welcome change to be on the same side as the former Zechs Marquise. "I hope the meeting goes well for you all."

"I appreciate you saying so, Trowa Barton and I look forward to speaking with you further when I find some down time of my own. It has been a pleasure talking with you."

"As it has with you." Trowa replied politely

"I bid you farewell for now." Zechs nodded and headed over to Noin and Relena who were waiting for him.

Trowa watched as they said their farewells to the mismatched pair and left.

"Trowa?" Quatre began a little tentatively returning to his lover's side.

Trowa glanced behind him. "What's wrong, koi?"

"You seem deep in thought." He handed the taller boy a drink.

"Thanks, and yes I am." He said earnestly. "I think that Zechs is a most remarkable man."

Quatre smiled, a gentle look befalling his round, petite face. "Yes, I believe he is, but I'm afraid that I'm just a little biased because to me you're more than remarkable, Trowa."

Trowa leant forward, softly kissing his lover. "You always seem to know exactly what to say."

"So… if I said that we should be getting home because I left the oven on, it's a good thing then?" The golden-haired boy grinned sheepishly.

Double taking, Trowa gave the boy a puzzled stare. "I'd say that was the oddest thing you've ever said on a random whim."

Quatre's sheepish grin deepened. "Oh, but, it wasn't really a random whim, Trowa. *sweatdrop* I er, really_did leave the oven on."

Trowa almost choked on his drink at the revelation, placed the glass onto the nearby table, grabbed his lover's hand and dragged him over to their hosts. "Gotta run! Catch you later! Emergency at home!!" And then they were gone.

Hilde turned to Duo. "Wonder what kinda emergency it is?"

"Hor_moan_al probably!" He said shrugging casually, a sly smirk on his face.

"Hentai!" the girl threw at him with a grin, thwapping him over the head gently.

Duo snickered pulling her a little closer to himself, eyeing her up and down "Many hottie squaws here." He said with a wink

Hilde blushed, averting her eyes from his gaze. "I ain't no squaw!"

THUMP!!

"OW !!"

Giggle.

Duo let go of Hilde rubbing the back of his head and the girl stepped back grinning as Heero walked back past them.

"Geeze, Yuy!! That hurt. What the hell did ya do that for?"

"Stop molesting the girl and put away that damn dust pan and broom like I asked you to!"

"Man did you have to hit me so damn hard... and besides I already put it away!!"

Heero turned the braided baka's head over to the table, directing it to look underneath.

"Well, it's out of the way... Isn't it?" He wrenched his head from Heero's grip and grinned back over at Hilde. "See what I have to live with?" He said trying to muster sympathy out of the dark-haired girl who was too busy laughing to comply.

"Aren't you listening to me!?!?" The annoyed Japanese boy demanded to know, folding his arms and glaring at the braided baka as he continued to converse with Hilde, totally ignoring the blue-eyed boy's requests for an answer "You never listen to me!" Heero sighed impatiently.

"I do when you're not putting me to sleep." the violet-eyed boy answered jovially.

THUMP!!

"OWWWW!!! SHIT!!! God damn it, Yuy!" He groaned rubbing the back of his head again and glaring at his housemate, but the ex-perfect soldier wouldn't back down.

"I think I hear Sally calling me." Hilde laughed, heading for safer pastures as glares of fire and ice passed from one ex-Gundam pilot to the other.

"All right already. Geeze!" Duo gave in crawling under the table and retrieving the carelessly discarded items in question. "I'll go put 'em back where they belong."

Heero's satisfaction was duly noted by the others as a large smile developed across his face. "You know, that actually felt good!!" He told them as they watched Duo sulk off into the laundry.

CRACK!!

THUD!!!

"HEEEROOO!!"

*Sigh*

The momentary smile of victory depleted into a frown of disillusioned resignation as Heero headed towards the sound of disaster.

He stopped in the doorway and peered down at the laundry cupboard door, which now seemed to be residing over the body of one Duo Maxwell. The only body part visible was the violet-eyed disaster zone's head.

"Oops, I broke it!"

Heero shook his head in disbelief. That had to be the dumbest, yet the most true and obvious observation the boy had ever made in his entire life. "You broke it, how did you break it?"

A sheepish look overcame him and Duo was almost lost for words. "It just sorta snapped off..."

"Sorta snapped off..."Heero rolled his eyes, glancing back over at the doorless cupboard. "Look. Duo! I know you used to call yourself the great destroyer, but... " he began remembering the untimely demise of the coffee table in the lounge less than an hour ago. "…could you please_not destroy everything we own?" He slowly turned and headed back out towards the others rubbing his forehead.

"What happened? " Dorothy inquired

"Maxwell of course!" Wu Fei answered. "What other explanation would there be?"

"I heard that, Chang!" Duo said, as he and the laundry cupboard door made an appearance.

"I see you've made a new friend, Maxwell."

"Yeah, Chang, I have a lot of friends." He said with a smirk holding up the door." Dora. I'd like you to meet Wu Fei! Wu Fei this is--"

"...Shut up Maxwell!!"

"Fine." Duo sniffed pretending to be insulted. "Dora and I know when we're not wanted." He sauntered back towards the laundry petting the offending door that he had tucked so lovingly under his arm. "Dora, I'm yo daddy." He grinned as they sauntered away. " …and you don't have to worry about that mean and horrible Wu bear person any more!"

A tiny black bug [N1] fell onto the floor and scurried towards Wu Fei as Duo and *Dora* disappeared back into the laundry.

"Damn son of a - I AM NOT WU BEAR!!!" Wu Fei eyed the pest racing towards him and aimed

*Squelch*

"That was disgusting!!" Dorothy commented as she looked down at the splattered bug on the floor.

"Oh well. " Duo laughed, returning with out his beloved *Dora* and staring at the same picturesque splat mark. "If it doesn't move, pick it up and spread it on a cracker."

"That's even more disgusting, Duo Maxwell." the blonde girl complained again as he wiped it up from the floor with paper toweling.

"Ooh. Look, Heero!! " Duo grinned walking up to him and opening up the toweling revealing the not so pretty colors. "It's warm and shiny and it squishes between my fingers."

"That's nice Duo!" Heero smirked, pulling out a sachet of sweet and sour sauce from his trouser pocket and holding it up. "Would you like fries with that?"

~ * ~

tbc........

[N1] explanation .. At this particular time as I was writing the actual bug scene..DSM, ShenLong, ChibiMina and myself were sitting here minding our own business, reading and writing ficcies, when suddenly the loud screech of DSM's panicked "OMG it's a cockroach!!!!!!!" made us all jump. Suddenly as we saw IT… Shenlong stated, "There was one word going through everyone's mind… actually it was two words…" To which we all chorused "Oh fuck!" and it sent everyone (except for me) fleeing for their lives from the biggest freaking bastard of a cockroach we'd ever seen >_< and considering not one of us happens to like bugs… of any shape, size or form, *I* somehow ended up with the job of pest exterminator. I then proceeded to scream my ass off over and over again whilst *begging* for the fly spray and an ice cream container. To which ShenLong yelled * I'm getting them for god's sake. Hold your horses."

*Finally* armed and ready for combat and * abandoned* well_and_truly by my crew mates as they ran around outside well away from the line of fire yelling "Get it away, get it away!!" I valiantly fought against the demon spawn of Satan (as DSM so rightly called it).

Taking aim with the fly spray, I fired stream after stream trying to get it to fall into the ice cream container and just when I thought I had claimed victory over the demon spawn, the damn thing fell into the ice cream container and promptly began to crawl out … towards my hand. Soooooooo... the container went flying and I did the only thing I could do… Ran like shit screaming out the front door.

After a few moments I gathered my decorum and bravely headed on back inside to face our foe…(Only cause no one else would >_< !! )

Tentatively I stepped back inside of the computer room and glanced about the place, trying to locate the enemy. Seeing it was *safe* I cautiously picked up my weapons and moved the cassette recorder that I had seen the enemy run behind before my cowardly retreat and seeing no sign of the offending bug, sighed with relief… prematurely... as the enemy made a ruthless surprise attack on my defenseless, naked foot, and I did the only thing I could do, jumped around screaming and cursing at the top of my lungs.

But bravely I fought on (once I calmed down) and finally as it tried to make it's escape with lungs full of pyrethrum and other undesirable-to-bug chemicals, I managed to capture the demon spawn in the ice cream container, shoved the lid on in less than a second and proceeded to shake the container hoping to render it dizzy whilst bolting outside yelling. " I got the bastard, get out the way, coming through. " promptly causing my extremely loyal and brave (cough cough) fellow authors to scatter in different directions screaming. ShenLong jumped the neighbors fence, Chibimina took off further into ShenLong's front yard, DSM was supporting the carport by hanging onto the pole (at least that's what she told us >_<…personally the rest of us agree she was trying to get on the roof ) and I headed across to the neighbors front lawn, still trying to render the monstrosity dizzy so I could let it go with out the recoil of another attack, suddenly deciding against letting it go.(.Ok I chickened out all right^^;;) I ran back over to ShenLong's front yard still holding the container, complete with demon spawn sending DSM so *bravely* running in the opposite direction as I was yelling, "What do I do with it, what do I do with." To which ShenLong, whilst finally committing to an act of bravery, (she says insanity), suggested "Chuck it in here, chuck in here!" whilst opening the WHEELY BIN!!.... Which I did.

There we were, standing there as ShenLong slammed the lid down triumphantly onto the evil we had just encountered, breathing heavy sighs of relief, the ordeal *finally* over.

One brave author (me) Two traumatized authors (ShenLong and Chibimina) and One quivering fan girl author(DSM still hugging the car) Returned for the victory feast, which consisted of strong coffee and M&M's all around. (recommended for traumatized and quivering fan girls and authors around the world.)

Finally when calm had been restored and our hearts had stopped racing, DSM (who had of course been the bravest of us all HAHAHA, NOOOOT!!!) Sat back and so proudly stated, with a smug look on her face,

"Mission complete!!"

and so ended the nightly adventure of the 4 Happy Hentai Musketeers…

By the way guys this is true… we may run and hide, (scream and run away at the site of bugs) but we never tell a lie. This is an accurate detailed description of everything that happened …