Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Extreme Home Makeover - Gundam Edition ❯ Day 6 - Evening ( Chapter 10 )

Day Six - Evening

 

As night fell with a dull thud, Howard wandered the premises. “First we lose the little blond kid, and those big guys, and now the loudmouth's gone. Oh, right, and that guy with the hair's missing too. What's going on here?”

 

“Problem, Howard?” Zechs leaned casually against the exterior bathroom wall, his welder's helmet amplifying the strange noises coming from inside. If he didn't know it was supposed to be a small bathroom in there, he'd think Wufei was building some kind of trans-dimensional device or something.

 

“Nah, not really. I expect he'll turn up.” Howard pulled a mildly mangled cigarette from his pocket, lit it, joined Zechs in his casual leaning. “Sad, though. I thought he'd really want what I've got to give him tonight!”

 

Zechs glanced sidelong at the scrawny engineer. “Oh, really? Howard, I had no idea!”

 

“Yeah,” Howard sighed, letting out a cloud of pungent smoke. “Damn shame, really.”

 

Zechs coughed. “I'm sure he'll forgive you…”

 

“I just don't want to hold onto it anymore, all by myself.” Howard looked up at the taller man, his expression intense. “Zechs, would you -”

 

“Oooh, hold on there, man… You know I like you, right? But not like that.”

 

“What are you talking about, Stretch?” Howard reached into his pocket and brought out a key ring. “I wanted to tell Duo that the house is done.”

 

“You're kidding!” Zechs grabbed the keys and stared as though they might vanish into Howard's dubious smoke cloud.

 

“Not one bit, my good man. The house is yours. I'm gonna go get some frickin' sleep.”

 

Zechs smiled to himself. True, it was kind of a shame that Duo wasn't around at the moment, but then, he trusted himself a little bit more as far as the final inspection went. Duo was just a little too excitable. And this project deserved a little dignity.

 

Setting his welder's mask on night-vision mode, he strode around the house and entered through the front door, pausing to take in the total lack of detail night-vision afforded him. Annoyed, he switched on a light.

 

The entryway was a thing of beauty. The tiles showed an avant garde patchwork quality that should charm the pants off of Heero. Zechs smirked at the thought that this was precisely what Duo had in mind. He'd have to check out the bedroom, see what mischief the braided wonder had been up to. In fact, he'd wager a bet that that's where the kid had scampered off to - hopefully not to do anything perverted.

 

Zechs strode through the house, surveying the work. Aside from that weird hammering noise and the distant murmur of running water, all was quiet. He paused to admire the greenery growing around the kitchen window, noting with a princely scowl that it seemed to have gotten in around the loose-fitting window frame. He'd have to chew someone's ass over that -

 

Zero System alert: situation CRITICAL. Please stand by.

 

What the -? Zechs frowned and tapped the side of his welder's helmet. The interior of the mask had taken on an oddly shadowed greenish hue, while the room beyond seemed to have tilted clockwise about 20°. Zechs staggered without even bothering to walk first and stood spraddle-legged in the middle of the kitchen. He'd experienced weird shit with Zero before, but this was pushing it.

 

Incoming data. Brace yourself.

 

The short hallway between the kitchen and the living room seemed to lengthen and tilt further, making Zechs feel as though he either had fallen into a nightmare or had one hell of a hangover. The Zero System poured data into his brain, further enhancing that unreal feeling.

 

Then Zechs assimilated the data. What he learned chilled him to the core.

 

<smutfic in which Treize gets tentacle-porked by a plant>

 

The smutfic copied itself directly to Zechs' brain via the satellite internet Zero System modem. Shock, horror, and a weird kind of excitement shot through his body, leaving him momentarily unable to move. “God, dear God!” he heard himself whisper, though he couldn't stop reading. There was a strange fascination, a sort of car-crash hypnotic quality that Zechs was powerless to resist.

 

A ghostly image of Treize drifted onto the viewscreen. The man was naked and bound shibari-style with writhing vines. He gazed imploringly at Zechs and warned, “Don't let them do to you what they did to me!” Then he seemed to gasp and lean forward as a particularly thick vine -

 

“Whoa!” Zechs whispered. “I need to remember that website…”

 

Just as Zechs decided the show wasn't all that bad, Zero cut in with another data-stream.

 

<smutfic in which Zechs gets tentacle-porked by an alien>

 

Again the story sprang fully loaded into his brain, and again he found it impossible to look away. This time, however, dread and a certain type of foreboding accompanied all the other reactions, leaving him trembling in his boots. “That thing is just…so FORCEFUL!” he breathed, fogging up the faceplate of his welder's mask.

 

Number of people admitting to a fetish for tentacle-porkings: 442

Recommend immediate withdrawal from the premises. We now return to our regularly scheduled programming.

 

Reality reasserted itself with a snap. “Right then!” The Lightning Count considered his options for a moment, reexamined the data…and bolted.

 

Unfortunately, he failed to take into account the new support post in the middle of the living room. With all the momentum of the damned he plowed into it, breaking his mask and knocking himself silly.

 

From the kitchen, strong green tentacles hurried to inspect their prize while it was still stunned. The Plant was pleased. This one was younger than the other had been: warm, firm, and apparently in full silk - perfect for propagating! Tendrils played with the human's long fine hair, tugging to make sure it wasn't loose: that would indicate it was past budding season for sure. But no, the hair was quite sturdy.

 

Zechs moaned as someone fondled his hair a little roughly before they rolled him over onto his stomach. “Mmm, Treize, but it's the middle of a banquet!” he murmured happily, oblivious to the evil swaying just above his now-bared buttocks.

 

The Plant wasn't quite sure which way this should go, whether this breeding specimen was a receptacle or a donor. It didn't matter, as the Plant was fully prepared to make the most of things either way. One thick vine probed between the slack muscles at the backside while a cluster of daintier vinelets wriggled underneath. Finding the human's stamen, the Plant shrugged slightly. It had hoped this one was a receiver, but then finding two donors in one day could be counted as a triumph for its agenda. DNA gained did count toward intelligence points, after all. It wrapped the smaller vines around the thickening member and began to withdraw its own male part from the unconscious human.

 

“No, don't go,” Zechs moaned, still out cold. “Treize, you're such a tease, damn it!”

 

The Plant hesitated. It had never encountered a situation quite like this before. Curious, it pushed its seed-bearing vine into the human's soft core.

 

“Mmmmm! Oh, yeah…”

 

Puzzled, the Plant pulled back…then thrust forward again.

 

“Oh YEAH!”

 

The human's stamen felt rigid in the Plant's tendrils. The Plant gave a squeeze as it thrust again.

 

With a shout, Zechs came, though in his concussion-ridden dream it wasn't a Martian Kudzu Vine but Treize, taking him forcefully on top of a buffet table at the Lake Victoria Academy Student Awards Banquet.

 

Small leaves curled around the spattered humanseed and began to assimilate it. This was the fastest response it had gotten from a donor in quite some time! The Plant calmly filed that information away. Maybe it could keep this one handy for a few more growing seasons…

 

A loud crashing caught its attention. Silhouetted in the open space that had recently been an exterior wall, a power-loader rotated its grappling claws in a menacing manner.

 

“Get away from him, you BITCH!” From within the small rental mobile suit, Lucrezia Noin glared death at the Plant. Towering over it and Zechs, she swung a mechanized karate chop at the vines on the floor, severing not only the vines but also the new hardwood flooring and the cement foundation beneath it.