Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Gundam Wing and the Men of Sherwood Forest ❯ Duo Goes Shopping ( Chapter 7 )

Oops! Sorry about misspelling `katana'. That's what happens when I start rushing to get chapters posted. I don't spend as much time doing my proof-reading. I'll try to be more careful. Stupid day job!

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Chapter 7: Duo Goes Shopping

“Trowa, why don't you come into town with me instead of sitting around moping about Quatre being gone?” Duo suggested.

“I'm not moping.”

“Oh? If your face was any longer you could poke your chin into your navel.”

“That's not true,” Trowa sighed.

Duo lifted an eyebrow and Wu-Fei grinned.

“You should go, Trowa,” Wu-Fei said.

“I suppose.”

“I think I'll go, too,” Treize said. “Perhaps we can learn more about the Sheriff's plans.”

“That's a good idea,” Zechs agreed. “We could stay at the castle for a few nights.” He winked at Treize.

Treize grinned back. “Sleeping in a soft bed?”

“I wasn't planning on sleeping,” Zechs chuckled.

“Oooh…” Duo said. “Do you gentlemen need a retainer? Or two? Wu-Fei and I could come with you and stay at the castle, too.”

“Do you know how to behave around nobility, Mister Maxwell?” Treize said. “If you're going to be a retainer, a certain level of decorous behavior is expected.”

“Hey, I can be decorous!”

“Do you even know what that means?” Heero snorted.

“Yes I do!”

“I think we should take them with us,” Zechs said. “It will make us look more credible to have attendants.”

“Is that wise?” Robin asked. “Guy of Gisbourne had quite a close view of Master Wu-Fei.”

“Don't worry, Robin,” Treize said with a smile, “I can handle Gisbourne. In fact, it might be fun to confront him.”

“You should not take unnecessary risks, Lord Treize,” Robin said worriedly.

Treize laughed lightly. “I love political intrigue! It's bread and butter to me. This is how I keep my wits sharp. If I get into trouble, I'll just challenge someone to a duel. A good fight would also be a pleasant diversion.”

“You are most definitely a nobleman,” Little John remarked. “Common men have not the time to develop such interests.”

Treize clasped Robin's shoulder. “Have no fear, Sir Robin. I promise you; we will return with useful information and our hides intact. Come gentlemen! Let's be off.”

Treize led the way as he, Zechs, Duo, Wu-Fei and Trowa set out for Nottingham.

“You are not joining them, Sir Heero?” Little John asked.

“No. I don't want to face Gisbourne until I see him on the lists. Anyway, I want to train. I haven't worked out in my armor for a while and I need to get used to the weight again.”

“Shall I assist you, Sir Heero?” Alan spoke up. “I have some experience in dressing out a knight.”

“Thanks, Alan. I could use some help.”

So Alan helped Heero don his armor and Heero got down to the serious business of sword practice. The Merry Men watched him with eyes that grew rounder by the minute.

“He appears so slight but he swings that broadsword like it weighs no more than a dandy's foil.”

“Aye and he flits about under all that steel like he's wearing naught but a cotton shift.”

“If any man can beat Gisbourne, I think it might be this one.”

“That pleases me well,” Will announced. “The best sight for my battered eyes would be Gisbourne lying beaten and bloodied in the mud.”

“That would be a pleasant sight indeed.”

“Aye.”

“And we can earn a little coin on it!” Jarvis exclaimed. “No one ever bets against Gisbourne. The odds on his opponents are always long. We can lay solid bets on Sir Heero and rake in a fortune when he crushes Gisbourne into the muck.”

“Now there's a most excellent idea!” Will agreed.

The Merry Men all agreed that Jarvis had hit upon a satisfactory plan, so they fell to counting their coin and debating the best way to lay out their bets to maximize profit. Robin listened to this exchange with some excitement.

“I say, Little John,” Robin exclaimed. “Perhaps I've a chance as well to earn a little way toward my own fortune.”

Little John nodded. “Aye, this seems like less of a gamble then some of your past investments. I may put a little money on Sir Heero myself.”

Friar Tuck sniffed. “Gambling is a sin.” He looked around at the Merry Men. “That being said, I have a few coins to add to the pot.”

Little John clapped him on the back. “Good man, Tuck! I'm sure God will forgive you if you donate your winnings to the poor.”

Tuck put his hands together piously. “That is my intention.”

“Right after he downs an ale or two!” someone called out.

“Even a man of the cloth must occasionally soothe his spirit.”

“With a warm ale and a warm bottom!”

“Show some respect, ruffian!”

Raucous laughter was the only respect Tuck received in return.

At Nottingham, Treize led his party into town with regal grace. The city guards, who were examining everyone entering the gate with dark-eyed suspicion, even stopping a few people to search them, inclined their heads politely as he passed and did not hinder him or his companions.

“Let's go through the market,” Duo said. “I need to look for a seamstress. And we might see something I need.”

“You'll have to carry it yourself,” Trowa pointed out. “Roku's not here.”

“I'll stick to the small stuff, then. Anyway, I can put it in my knapsack after I leave the silk with the seamstress.”

The streets of Nottingham were as crowded as ever and on every side, people talked excitedly about the bishop's mishap on the highway and the Sheriff's announcement. Duo walked with his head tilted to one side, his eyes half-closed.

Wu-Fei touched Duo's arm. “Are you listening to their thoughts?”

“As much as I can,” Duo replied with a grimace. “It's hard with so many people, but maybe someone knows more than he's saying. When people lie, the truth is right on the surface of their minds.” He brightened suddenly. “Oh, hey! That woman just came from her seamstress. Let's try that shop.” He turned down a side street that was lined on both sides with seamstresses, tailors, lace makers and weavers. He stopped in front of a small shop with a little sign out front with a picture of a needle and spool of thread. “I'll just be a second,” he said and ducked inside.

Treize stopped in front of a tailor's shop that had displays of cloth in the wide doorway. “I think I need a new suit. Feel this brocade.”

Zechs ran a hand over the cloth. “It's nice.”

“You should wait for Duo,” Wu-Fei advised. “He'll get you a better deal.”

Duo reappeared after several minutes looking slightly flushed. “She insisted on measuring my bottom.”

Wu-Fei lifted an eyebrow. “With or without your trousers?”

“Without, of course.”

Wu-Fei studied Duo's face. “You didn't…!”

“It's not my fault! She offered!”

Trowa put a hand over his face.

Treize and Zechs exchanged an amused glance.

“Your capacity for sex continues to astonish me,” Treize remarked.

“Did we ever tell you about the twelve virgin daughters of the stone-eyed duke?” Trowa asked.

“Don't bring that up!” Duo groaned.

Wu-Fei grinned. “They weren't virgins after Duo left.”

“And all in one afternoon,” Trowa added.

“That's amazing!” Zechs said.

“You should talk,” Treize said casually. “I seem to remember a certain party insisting that I shouldn't be tired after only nine times one night.”

“We hadn't been together for years. I had some catching up to do.”

“So that would be the reason why you still want to do it three or four times every night?”

“I'm still getting over that part where you were dead for over a year.”

“Ah yes.” Treize smiled affectionately at Zechs. “I say, Duo, on another topic, I was thinking of having a suit made out of this brocade. Would you care to do a little bargaining for me?”

“It would be my pleasure!” Duo strolled into the tailor's shop, followed by Treize and Zechs. Wu-Fei and Trowa waited outside.

Twenty minutes later, the three reappeared.

“I stand entirely in awe of Mister Maxwell's capabilities,” Treize said. “I'm not sure if the tailor realizes it, but he is only being paid for his labor. At some point, Duo managed to convince him that the cost of his effort included the material.”

Duo waved a hand modestly. “It was nothing.”

Wu-Fei frowned. “You didn't use a mental compulsion on him did you?”

“Of course not! That would be unethical.” Duo rubbed his hands together. “Now that I'm warmed up, let's shop!”

By the time they reached Nottingham castle, Duo's knapsack was stuffed and he had eaten three times. But he actually had more money than when he'd started, because he'd bargained, bartered, traded and resold items for a profit. The other members of the party could only regard him in stunned silence.

“Well, I'm ready for lunch!” Duo announced. “I imagine they've got a good kitchen in the castle.” He looked up at the towering stone walls.

“It is quite good,” Treize assured him. “But remember to be on your best behavior, Mister Maxwell. You're a servant for the time being.”

Duo grinned at him. “Yes, milord!”

The five of them entered the castle. Within minutes, Lady Margaret had found them.

“Oh, my dear Lord Treize and Lord Zechs! It is so good to see you again!” She clasped her hands to her bosom. “I had hoped you would call on us again.”

Treize offered her a graceful bow. “How could we stay away after the marvelous hospitality you showed us last time, Lady Margaret?” He indicated the three Gundam pilots. “We have brought a few of our retainers this time, so as not to place a burden on your own hardworking staff.”

“You are so thoughtful, my lord.” She stepped between them and looped each arm through one theirs. “Please join us for our midday meal. Your retainers may either attend you or dine in the kitchen.”

“They can go to the kitchen,” Treize said. “That way I can focus my attention on my hostess.” He favored Lady Margaret with an intimate smile.

She flushed and giggled. “Oh, Lord Treize!” She led the two of them away.

Duo grinned at Trowa and Wu-Fei. “Let's find the kitchen. I'm starving. I bet we can find a dice game, too.”

Wu-Fei shook his head. “Remember what Treize said about behaving decorously.”

“Yeah, yeah!”

There was a wide dining room next to the kitchen where the servants ate buffet style. Food was available all day long since servants ate when they were free and that happened at all times of the day. The buffet was excellent, containing several kinds of roast meat and fowl, meat pies, boiled potatoes and turnips, stewed beets, fresh bread and butter, jams and jellies, a few puddings and fruit cobblers.

Duo's eyes went wide. “Would you look at that?”

Trowa sighed. “Try to leave some for the people who work.”

“I'll just have a little of everything.”

“Didn't he just eat in the market?” Wu-Fei grumbled.

“You know Duo.”

“Sadly, I do.”

The servants sat at long trestle tables with benches on both sides to eat. Duo, Trowa and Wu-Fei had just settled at a table to eat when a pretty young maid approached them.

“Are you the retainers of the two visiting gentlemen from France?”

Trowa nodded. “Yes, although they aren't from France.”

“Oh.” She smiled shyly. “They are very handsome gentlemen. Are they as kind to work for as they seem?”

“Oh yes. Lord Treize is a consummate gentleman and Lord Zechs could not be a kinder master.”

Duo rolled his eyes.

The maid's smile turned wistful. “I would be most pleased to work for such gentlemen.”

“Is your master mean to you?”

“No, but he can be very impatient. But then, the Lord Sheriff has many worries.”

Wu-Fei looked up. “You work for the Sheriff of Nottingham?”

“Yes.”

“I hear he is facing a difficult challenge right now.”

“Oh yes!” The maid sat down and leaned forward excitedly. “He and his deputies will be leaving in the morning to hunt for Robin Hood and his bandits in Sherwood Forest! It's very exciting. But the Lady Marian is most distressed over it, so she won't speak to the Lord Sheriff anymore and he is very upset about that.” She lowered her voice. “He desires to wed Lady Marian, but she has eyes only for Robin Hood. I hear he is very handsome, but I have never seen him.”

“Is the Sheriff taking a lot of deputies?” Trowa asked casually.

“Twenty men, I heard.”

“That's quite a few.”

She nodded. “But I daresay our troubles seem quaint to well-traveled persons like you.”

“Not at all.”

“Well, I had better get back to my duties. Good day to you.” She hurried off.

“That was certainly fortuitous,” Wu-Fei said after she was gone.

“Yeah,” Trowa agreed. “I wonder if Treize and Zechs have learned anything.”

In fact, those two named gentlemen were engaged in conversation with Guy of Gisbourne, who was already well into his cups despite it being the middle of the day.

“Am I mistaken in recalling that you were assigned as escort to the Lord Bishop on his ill-fated trip, Sir Guy?” Treize asked.

Gisbourne fixed a rather bleary eye on Treize. “I was there, but the brigands outnumbered us.” His speech slurred a little.

“Did they? Well, I can understand then how you were unable to protect the Lord Bishop.”

“I protected him just fine!” Gisbourne protested. “He suffered no hurt!”

“Except to his pride and purse,” Zechs murmured.

“What's that?!”

Zechs smiled his most charming smile. Several ladies seated nearby became faint. “I did not mean to imply anything, Sir Guy, but did not the Lord Bishop lose a chest of tithes?”

Gisbourne's face darkened. “Only the lowest sort of man would steal from the Church.”

“What do you suppose the thieves are doing with all that money?”

“Wasting it on women and ale!” Gisbourne declared.

“So why are you planning to sweep through Sherwood instead of the local inns looking for the thieves?”

“Because Robin Hood's band hides out in Sherwood!”

“But I should think the temptation to spend such a windfall would be too great. Why don't you look for them in the inns of Nottingham?”

Gisbourne scratched his head in confusion. “Now that I think on it, that's a right good idea.” He surged unsteadily to his feet. “I'll go do that right now!” He reeled out of the room.

Treize laughed softly and whispered into Zechs' ear, “By morning, he'll be too hung over to sit on a horse.”

Lady Margaret was frowning. “That man does not strike me as a very good sort of knight,” she huffed.

“Do not let such things trouble you, my lady,” Zechs purred. “Your pretty brow should not be marred by a frown's wrinkle.”

Lady Margaret turned pink. “Um…Yes. Well. Perhaps you gentlemen will accept the hospitality of the castle for the night again?”

“We would be most pleased to do so, my lady. Will you have accommodations for our retainers as well? Two rooms would be sufficient for their needs.”

“Of course.”

“Thank you.”

Maid Marian entered at that moment with the Sheriff beside her. She was pointedly ignoring him.

“Lady Marian,” Sheriff Mark said patiently. “Once I have scoured Sherwood, we will know one way or the other if Robin Hood was responsible and that will put an end to it.”

Marian sniffed. “I do not care to discuss it.” Her eyes fell on Treize and she smiled brightly. “My dear Lord Treize, what an honor it is to see you again!” She hurried forward.

Treize stood up and kissed her on the cheek. The Sheriff's face turned bright red. “Lady Marian, you are a delight for the eyes, as always.”

Marian giggled. “Thank you, my lord!” She curtsied to Zechs. “My Lord Zechs, I am pleased to see you again as well.”

Zechs stood up and bowed. “My lady.”

The Sheriff frowned at them. “I was not aware you were still in Nottingham, Lord Treize.”

“How could I leave, with such delightful company as Lady Margaret and Lady Marian to enjoy?”

The two ladies blushed and giggled delightedly.

“And these other ladies,” Zechs waved a hand to encompass the room. “Such an incomparable collection of beauty will take several weeks, perhaps months to fully appreciate.” He swept the room with his most stunning smile, causing most of the ladies and several of the men to fall into a dead faint. “I for one will not be satisfied until I have had an intimate conversation with each fine individual present.” He smiled again and finished off the few who were still conscious. “We may need to stay several days.”

The Sheriff stared.

Treize put an arm around Marian's waist. “I understand you'll be away for several days hunting brigands in Sherwood, Sheriff Mark. I will be happy to keep Lady Marian company in your absence, lest some lesser man take advantage of her loneliness to pray upon her gentle nature.”

The Sheriff's mouth worked, but no sound came out.

“In fact, you must be very busy preparing for your raid.” Treize held out his other hand to Lady Margaret. “Why don't we retire to some comfortable parlor where we can sit and talk, ladies?”

“Of course, Lord Treize,” Lady Margaret agreed immediately. She took his hand and rose to her feet.

Marian nodded vigorously.

Treize inclined his head to the Sheriff. “Until next time, sir.” He slipped his arm through Margaret's and led the two ladies away, joined by Zechs, who took Lady Margaret's other arm. A dozen or so ladies and gentlemen who had regained their senses hurried after them.

Sheriff Mark's face flushed such a dark shade of red he appeared on the verge of a fit.