Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ GWvsSM ❯ GW Team+2 go get'em food! ( Chapter 9 )

Chapter 9: GW Team+2 go get'em food!!!

Heero landed on and unsuspecting Duo, was in the middle of stuffing an unconscious truck driver, he had just hijacked, into a steel drum.

"Ow! Heero!?" he yelled pushing the Wing Pilot off his head. "Man, you need to work off some of that weight!"

"Hn?" he replied rubbing his bum and wandering around Duo, babbling in disbelief, " I can't believe she got me…. I can't believe she drugged me at the party. Dear gawd, what did she make me do?"

"You probably don't want to know." Duo suggested.

"You're probably right." Heero nodded. "So where are we and where the others?"

Wufei climbed down from a tree and strolled over to Pilots 01 and 02. "She got you too, Heero?"

"No, Relena zapped him." Duo snickered, dodging a swift back hand by Heero.

"How pathetic!" Wufei sighed. "Onnas are dangerous…."

Heero nodded in agreement and looked around the enviroment. The stolen mack truck was the only reminder of civilization, besides the road. He noticed a far off farm with cows. Trowa hates cows. He remembered. He says they'll eat him. Better be careful. He concluded. Masses of tall trees, on both sides of the road, littered the asphalt with pine needles and oak leaves. A soft breeze came by, soothing Heero's nerves. This is nice, so peacful, so… Then he smelled the manure. Stank.

"I hate this place! I will kill EVERYONE on the Peacemillion…."

"Take a number." Wufei retorted.

Duo successfully kicked the steel drum down the conviently sloped road and smiled, "Okay, let' take this guy's truck and head to town!"

Wufei glared at Duo, "Did you remember to nab the keys, Maxwell?"

"….!" Duo blinked. He suddenly went racing down the sloped roadway. "I'll be right back!!!"

"….idiot…" Heero and Wufei muttered in unison.

Raye walked out from the woods. She looked over to Wufei and smiled. She stared at Heero and groaned, "She got you, too. That BITCH!"

Heero didn't bother to correct her. It was a bitch that zapped him.

Raye continued, "Hey, where's that long-hair kid, Duo?"

He pointed towards the roadside at the running Shinagami. "The Braided Wonder is recovering the keys."

"In a steel drum." Wufei added. He made his attention the cargo truck, and climbed inside. He checked the glove compartment for stuff; posibly a weapon, Twinkie, or even--- "Found the spare key."

"That'll do." Heero vocalized. Ready to just drive off, leaving Duo to chase his steel drum, he climbed into the driver's seat, and held the keys into of the ignition, "Give me one good reason not to ditch him."

Wufei hissed and confessed, "I sent Trowa and Zechs to survey the area further down the road." He concluded in jest, "We'll just be waiting for them. If Duo shows up first then, so be it."

"Hn…"

Raye jumped up into the passenger's side next to Wufei and suggested, "Let's just backup and pick up those two. We might be able to back over Duo."

Heero and Wufei looked at each other. "Sweet!" they replied calmly.

~~~~~~~

Duo was running for dear life after the rolling, tumbling, and screaming drum. The track and field hopeful was just a few yards away when he sighted Trowa and Zechs treading up the road.

~~~~~~

"So I said: 'Hey baby! Whassup!' And the trick zapped me!" The former Lightning count explained to the silent clown. "So now I'm stuck here with you guys on an errand to pick up some food--- ain't that a bitch!?"

"….." Trowa agreed. "…."

"Yeah…." Not understanding the language of dots, but trying to be as polite as possible.

"….!" Trowa displayed panic. "!!!!"

"Relax! Maybe you should consider being a mime, or something."

"There's a steel drum rolling towards us."

Zechs was so shocked to hear Trowa speak, he didn't pay attention to WHAT he was saying. "WTF?! Man! I thought you were some freaky mute--- I can't believe you actually speak whole words----"

Peeved, Trowa pushed Zechs Marquise aside and stopped the steel drum with his foot.

"What? A steel drum?! Why didn't you say anything?!" Zechs growled in confusion.

Trowa got pissed and yelled, "You, himbo!!! I said: 'There's a steel drum tumbling towards us!'!!!! I AM NOT A MUTE---- I JUST DON'T SEE THE POINT IN TALKING WHEN THERE'S NO NEED TO----oooopf!!!"

Quatre fell on Trowa's head and the steel drum continued to roll, crushing them both.

"Ack!!! Something touched my butt again!!!!" Quatre whined. "Someone help--- ACK!!!"

Trowa tossed Quatre off of him and yelled, "GET THE HELL OFF ME!!!!"

Quatre whimpered, "Why are you YELLING at me?!?"

The Silencer froze, "Quatre…?? I thought you were a cow."

Zechs smacked his forehead, "Not this again….."

Duo pulled the brakes and shouted, "Hey! Quatre! You're here, too! That's great!"

Trowa and Zechs both snapped, "NO it isn't!"

Suddenly, Trowa noticed MORE danger approaching. As a HUGE cargo truck went backing up in their direction. He tugged at Quatre's arm to get his attention, knowing it was probably hopeless to try and warn Zechs and Duo.

"!!!!"

Quatre folded his arms and rolled his eyes, "What-EVER! You yelled at me for NO reason."

"!!!!" he implored.

Quatre turned away from Trowa, becoming obstinate. "Nope! I'm not listening to yoooooooou…." He turned towards the oncoming danger and spazzed, "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYH!!!! There's a huge truck backing into us! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK!!!!!!"

"…."

Zechs run off road and jumped into a bush.

Quatre ducked and covered his head.

Duo moved to the side.

Trowa stood there and shouted, "…."

~~~~~~~~~~~~

"What? Trowa's back there?" Heero glanced at the rear view mirror and sighed, "Damn, Duo moved."

Duo jumped upon the drivers-side door and smiled, "You can't hit the ShizNit! You can't hit the ShizNit!"

Heero fumed. "….get in."

"ALRIGHT!!!!

* * * * *

Now there were six Gundam pilots, and a renegade Sailor Scout all snug in a truck, heading for civilization….. if there's any…..

Raye interjected (the silence) and asked, "What are we gonna pick up? Burgers? Fish?…."

"I don't know….." Zechs uttered, staring out at the zooming trees. "Why should we bother getting them ANYthing."

The group couldn't help but agree.

"Yeah, especially that witch, Sally!!!" Raye growled.

"…." Trowa suggested

Quatre concurred, "Yes, I agree! We should go to Steak & Shake!"

Wufei mumbled, "You ALWAYS agree with Trowa!"

Heero added with his monotoned voice, "Yeah, shut-up, Bubble Butt!"

"Bubble Butt….. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!" Trowa cracked. He stopped when everyone just…. Gawked at him. "Sorry."

Quatre sniffled, "How would you know!?!? You're the one who kept smashing your face in my Bubble Butt----"

"You assaulted MY ass first, Bubble Butt!!!"

Duo gave the two an odd stare. Zechs and Wufei did the same.

"No one told you to stop MOVING, Flat Butt!!!

Trowa and Raye died laughing. The other three just stared.

"You didn't move fast enough, Bubble Butt!!!"

"WHOA!!!" Zechs intervened. "How about leaving the details OUT!!! Let's talk about food----for the love of…."

Quatre and Heero both defended, "Wait it's not what you think----"

"We don't wanna think right now! Let's NOT talk about butts AT ALL." Duo concluded as he went onto the subject of pizza. "I'm up for Dominoes!"

"I hate Dominoes! The cheese is too grainy!" Wufei complained. They are way too cheap to use real cheese. I prefer a more worthy pizza joint: Pizza Hut."

"Jeezus, Chang! Their pizza is way too greasy!" Zechs argued. "Pizza Hut is NOT a choice place for a warrior!"

"…." Wufei glared. "Well, what do you choose!?"

"Popeyes chicken." Zechs suggested. "That chicken is the bomb."

"Well, what about Subway!" Quatre beamed. "The fat intact is low! And the sandwiches are tasty."

"You also get cookies with EVERY meal…." Trowa added sarcastically. "Enough of the cookies! You keep eating cookies and you will be a Bubble Butt!"

Quatre retorted with an angry tone, "I eat the sandwiches, TOO!"

"Sometimes…."

Quatre confessed, "…..yeah…"

Trowa finished by saying, "No Subway. Let's go to Boston Market."

"I'm in the mood for chicken nuggets." Heero uttered, out of the blue. "I'm voting for Mc Donald's."

Duo commented slyly, "So that'll be 5 Happy Meals for you. You know they have the Atlantis toys this month and I'm sure you---- OW!!!"

Heero served Duo and swift FWAP to the back of the head while driving. Mad Skills!!! PHWAP!!!

"…..I could go for some Thai." Trowa admitted.

"How about Taco Bell. They don't have cookies!" Quatre assured.

"I'd rather BB-Q ribs." Wufei spoke out. "Is there a Johnny's BBQ Pit?"

Zechs lectured, "Ribs are not a choice----"

"SHUT-UP!!!! I don't care about the choice food for warriors!!!! I want ribs!!!!"

Trowa shudered, "Not….. cow….. ribs…..?!?"

"……yes!"

"You eat those things?!" Trowa freaked.

"We eat cows all the time at the Burger joints!" Quatre added. "Those are cows!"

"Shut-up! Bubble Butt!" Trowa snapped. "Cows eat people! We can't eat cows!!! Or we eat people!"

The rest of the group stared at each other. Heero rolled his eyes and continued to stay focused on driving.

Duo decied to break the silence and soothe the spastic pilot, "Trowa, cows don't eat people. People eat People."

"Oh my GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWD!!!!" Trowa screamed.

PHWAP!!! Heero smacked Duo in the back of the head. "What kind of silly shit is that to say!?!"

"Quatre you gave us people burgers?!?!" Trowa gasped. "Wufei eats the ribs of the people?!?! Duo eats people?!?!? What kind of human beings are YOU!!!!"

"We're not human, we're -----OWW!!!"

Heero hissed, "Omae o Korosu----IDIOT!!! Don't make me pull this truck over!!!"

"Oh my GAWD, YOU are ALL COWS!!!" The HeavyArms Pilot screamed.

"Trowa Barton. Do NOT make me pull this truck over." Heero uttered in a dull tone of annoyance.

Trowa was in a state of sheer panic. He tried to open the door on Zechs' side. The Lightning Count, refusing to die alone, grabbed for Duo's braid. Heero was pleased. Then Duo grabbed for Quatre's head,. Quatre grabbed for Wufei's arm. Then Wufei grabbed for Raye's leg. The fiery chic decided to grab for the steering wheel, causing the huge truck to swerve viciously, running over cars and random cows. Heero thought this was fun. Finally, with almost all the pilots and one Sailor Scout on the verge of falling out of the truck, Heero decided to stop the truck….

"Alright! That's it!!!" Heero shouted smashing the brakes, causing the truck to do a 360 in the middle of the road….

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK!!!" the rest of the group yelled in sheer TERROR!!!