Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ I Feel So Alone ❯ thinking ( Chapter 3 )

Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing. Please read and review.

(Begin)

I can not believe that he did this to himself.
If he needed to talk, he could have talked to me.
I would have never put him down.
I would have listened to what he had to say.
I hear one of my friends crying.
Someone is getting up to hold him while he cries.
Why can I not cry?
Have I been trained somehow in order to hide my feelings?
I just want to understand why he decided to kill himself.
Did he not think about the rest of us when he plunged the knife in his
chest?
If he wanted to die, then why did he not go off by himself?
I just can not believe that he forgot about the people he would leave
behind.
If it was me, I would have left a note and went away to kill myself.
Why did I just think that?
That is not me because I would never kill myself.
Sometimes I think that he does not know what he really wants in life.
Well, the sun is coming up and I need to wake the others.
The one said we would go for breakfast and then donate blood.
If it was anyone else laying in that bed, I do not know if I would be able
to help.
I somehow managed to get everyone awake, not that it was hard.
Judging by everyone's red eyes, none of us got much sleep.
The three of them look like they are ready to cry as the nurse lets us in
the room.
I can not believe all of the machines hooked up to him.
I asked the nurse what the machines were for.
She told me that some of the machines were to help keep him alive.
The nurse pointed to the IV pole and said that there is blood, antibiotics,
and saline in the pouches.
I asked her why and she said it is to help the body replenish blood, keep
infection out, and to hydrate the body.
I guess that I started to sway unevenly, because I was suddenly in one of
my friends' arms.
He helped me over to the hard-plastic chair and told me to stay there for a
few minutes.
The nurse brought me over a cup of cold water and told me to drink it
slowly.
I do as I am told and I begin to feel better.
When the third friend turns towards me, I see unshed tears in his eyes.
I tell him to cry if he wants to and no one will make fun of him.
He starts to cry and that sets off a chain reaction amongst all of the
three of them.
I start to ask why I can not cry and one of them informs me that I am
crying.
After we finish crying, we go for some food at a restaurant.
While we are eating, the table is silent.
No one is talking and it does not take us long to get done with the food.
When we get back to the hospital, we find out where to donate blood.
The blood donation people are happy to see us and get blood from all of us
quickly.
Before we leave the room, I see an order for more blood for my friend.
The one volunteer sees me looking at the paper and hides it.
He requests that I do not tell anyone about that paper.
I was not supposed to see it all.
When we get back up to our friend's room, there is a doctor waiting for us.
He tells all of us to follow him to his office.
We do as he says and follow him in a nice little line.
When we get in office, he tells us to sit down.
After we get comfortable, he begins to explain a little about what is
happening.
He said that our friend had just missed his heart by an inch and that was
the good news.
He said the bad news is that our friend may never wake up and die sleeping.
The doctor said that the coma is probably going to last for a while if our
friend is to wake up someday.
I hear a choked sob in the room and I realize that it was me.
Someone asked the doctor if it is alright if somebody stays with our friend
each day.
The doctor asked him why and he replied that he is certain that our friend
will wake up.
The other two agree with him and I just nod my head.
The doctor asked if I have cried and I said that I cried today.
As the doctor leads us back to the hospital room, I see some cots in the
room.
The nurse explained that we are allowed to sleep here in the room with our
friend.

(Finished)

Thank you for reading. As you can tell there are still no names as to who
each person is. You can take a guess if you want. The very last chapter, I
promise I will list names for each chapter so that you will know who is
talking. Thank you again for reading this and please review.