Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ If You Asked Me To ❯ If You Asked Me To ( Chapter 1 )

[ P - Pre-Teen ]

Disclaimers: I do not own any of the g-boys. They belong to Sunrise and other companies, etc. Nor do I own the song "If you asked me to". It belongs exclusively to Diane Warren and Celine Dion and all other people who own it, just NOT me. I'm using them without permission, but for entertainment purposes ONLY. This is fans for fans. I've also used a couple of lines from Katherine's translation from the Episode Zero manga, Quatre's story. I will cite them at the bottom.

If You Asked Me To
By Mika-chan

"Quatre-san, a package just arrived for you."

An alert head rose the moment the voice was first heard and Quatre placed his pen to the side.

"Package? Who is it from, Doris?"

His secretary crossed the thinly carpeted floor and handed him the palm-sized parcel. "Your guess is as good as mine, Quatre-san," the tall brunette replied with a smile. "It arrived this morning but had no return address. Security had to x-ray it for precautionary measures, but found nothing dangerous."

Quatre nodded slightly before glancing down at the wrapped box in his hand. He turned it about and indeed found that nothing was written on the box save for his address. A puzzled look crossed his face as he lifted his gaze once more. "So was Rei able to find out where it came from?"

The lanky girl shook her head. "I'm afraid not. She only ran a preliminary check on it, but if you would like her to, I'm sure she'd be able to pull all her resources to determine its origins."

Quatre shook his head lightly, eyes falling again to the object in his hands. "No, that won't be necessary. Thank you."

Doris nodded. "I'll be leaving now, Quatre-san and not to sound like a mother hen, but you should be too. It's already six thirty and on a Friday night no less. You should be going out."

Quatre smiled, eyes following the reproachful digit wagging in his direction and placed the brown box on the side of his desk. "Yes _Mother_, right after I finish looking over this report."

Flipping her shoulder length hair, Doris gave him a sideways glance. "I don't know why I even bother."

"Because you're a caring and considerate person," Quatre quipped, head now resting on top of his right hand.

Doris' lips slowly rose on one side. "True. I'll give you that, Quatre-san. Though why I waste it on a hopeless case like yours is beyond me."

The ex-gundam pilot almost laughed, inclining his head to the side. "There are many unsolved mysteries in the universe. You shouldn't frustrate yourself on this one."

Quatre waited for her response, still smiling, and watched as she turned her back to him.

"Okay...you win this time, Quatre-san. But there's always tomorrow." She turned her head back around revealing a smile of her own. "Goodnight Quatre-san."

"Goodnight Doris."

Quatre could only shake his head as she closed the door behind her, leaving him alone once again in his office building at Winner Inc. These daily banters really did serve to loosen his nerves from the day's stress, as well as distract him, albeit temporarily, from the world's troubles around him.

They were only small troubles though. A wrongly funded project here, an inventory discrepancy there-nothing nearly comparing to the war that just ended a year ago and the recent Marimeia incident.

No, things were looking up for the colonies and Earth and if Quatre could help it things were going to stay that way.

Sighing to himself, Quatre lifted his pen and continued to review the file in front of him.

Doris was right though. He really should try to go out more often. He could barely remember the last time he'd actually gone somewhere other than to his office and his house, or when he'd last visited any of his friends. Well, that wasn't entirely true. He did just see Wufei last week, but that was entirely on business. A gas explosion at one of his factories caused both to be at the scene. No one was killed; however, three were reported with mild injuries. Still, all in all he was thankful that all the workers were fine and that the three injured were able to go home after a few hours.

After the investigation, which found that the explosion was indeed an accident, he and Wufei were able to exchange a few words before both had to report back to work. From what he could tell Wufei was doing fine, maybe even better than that. For the first time Quatre could see that Wufei's unstable lifestyle and ideals were finally resolving into something more lucid and defined.

Quatre was happy for him as he was with the others as well.

Duo and Heero were both working together on a scrap yard on L2. Quatre was surprised to say the least when he had heard about it from Duo firsthand. Although Heero didn't admit anything then or even now as to why he chose to stick around the American, he had a hunch. When he shared it with Duo all he received in return was a blank stare which quickly dissolved into a "are you crazy" look.

Still, it was comforting to know that both pilots would be together for a while, looking out for each other as they did so well during the war.

Trowa also seemed to be in the same position as the others. Although he hadn't spoken directly with the brunette since the Marimeia incident, owing to the fact that his circus traveled frequently and was difficult to track, he'd heard the teen was faring well. Afterall, Trowa did have Catherine around to take care of him so he was sure the ex-HeavyArms pilot was in good care.

Yet even so, as much as Quatre would have liked to be eased by this knowledge, the reassurance wasn't able to fill the small emptiness that opened in his heart the moment he and Trowa parted ways. He believed he and Trowa developed a strong friendship that of which could compare or even rival Heero and Duo's. He supposed the suddenness of their parting and the break in communication caused him to miss the pilot more than he did the others.

He missed the long conversations they shared at times when they attempted to block out the war that was obviously occurring around them. He missed the thoughtfulness Trowa used before answering each of his questions. He missed his patience, the overall sense of experience he emitted. He missed...He missed Trowa. His friend. His savior.

He missed the person who pulled him from the hate and turmoil he drowned himself in after his father's death. He missed the person who seemed to know him so well even when he himself had forgotten.

He missed Trowa. It was as simple as that.

But there was nothing he could do about it at the moment. Perhaps when everything was settled with his firm and running accordingly could he go in search for his friend.

Perhaps then he could finally thank him.

* * * * *

Quatre heard the distinctive ringing of his vid-phone the moment he opened the front door to his house. Shuffling with his briefcase, his keys, and his overcoat, he managed to kick the door closed behind him, toss off his shoes and walk over to the living room. Dumping all his belongings onto the floor, he pushed the receive button on the side panel.

Duo's cheerful face appeared and Quatre smiled, greeting him with unveiled enthusiasm. "Duo!"

"Hey Quatre! Where've you been?" Duo seemed to be looking around the blonde and his eyes fell on the pile of things on the floor. "You just get home?"

Quatre ran a hand through his hair, a childhood habit that decided to kick in recently whenever he was nervous, and his previous smile turned more rueful. "Aa. Just a second ago."

A playful disapproving look appeared on Duo's face as he started to wag a pointed digit. "Quatre, Quatre. It's a Friday night and you're the only person I know who would still be working. Even Heero over here took off early today." Duo wiggled his eyebrows. "I think I'm rubbing off on him."

Quatre heard a distinct "hn" in the background and chuckled. "How IS Heero, Duo? And how are you for the matter?"

Duo tilted his head, pointer finger poised on his cheek. "Eh, we're both okay. Nothing's come up that we can't handle. How about you?"

Quatre shrugged. "Hmm...I'm all right as well. Not much excitement on my end either. I did see Wufei last Tuesday. He looked like he was doing okay too."

"Oh yea? That's good. Haven't seen him in a while. Saw Trowa though. Man! I can't get enough of his act. Still can't figure out how a body can bend and twist that much," Duo finished with a decisive shake of his head.

Quatre blinked at the screen. "Trowa?" he echoed a second after he first heard the name. "How is he, Duo? I haven't seen him since-since five months ago. Is he well?" he asked earnestly though trying to mask his enthusiasm on hearing about his friend.

"He's doing great. Even caught him smiling once with Catherine. I thought I'd never see the day when he'd do that-_and_ in public even."

Quatre smiled softly. He had seen Trowa smile before, but knew it took a lot for him to display it openly to people. He must be doing well. "That's good to hear," he finally said.

Duo nodded in agreement. "Yep. So, Quatre, I was calling to tell you that we'd be arriving on L4 at around two in the afternoon tomorrow. So come pick us up, 'kay?"

Quatre straightened. "Sure. No problem Duo. I'll be there."

"Great! I guess I'll see you tomorrow?"

"Aa. Don't forget to bring some swimming trunks," the blonde added quickly before the other could manage to disconnect their transmission. "I just had a water slide installed in the pool I know you'll love."

A wicked grin crossed Duo's features before he saluted. "Ryoukai! See you then!"

With a final wave Quatre cut off the line, his spirit rejuvenated from the conversation. He'd forgotten that Duo and Heero were visiting him this weekend. He chided himself for letting such an event slip his mind and gathered his belongings from the floor before ascending the stairs to the second floor.

Entering his bedroom, Quatre tossed his overcoat onto his desk chair, his briefcase following soon after and began untying the tie around his neck. He hated wearing ties. They were so uncomfortable and confining. Too bad they were already a large practice in the business world.

After removing the silk, striped cloth, he ran a tired hand through his hair, his mind going through all the things he had to do before the duo, no pun intended, arrived tomorrow. It was only when the task of completing any unfinished business crossed his mind did he remember the package he received earlier tonight.

Walking to the chair beside his mahogany desk, he unbuttoned the top of his collared shirt and reached for his briefcase. Punching in the proper combinations, he opened the lid to the case and pulled out the wrapped box. He examined it again absently wondering who would send something to him. There could always be a note inside, his subconscious suggested, encouraging him to just open the box and be done with it.

Why _was_ he making such a big deal of this anyway, he thought idly as he sat on his bed. He carefully removed the scotch tape off the sides of the box and pulled the thin brown paper away. A white box was revealed. Lifting up the lid, his expression donned a puzzled look.

A cassette tape? These things were ancient.

He removed the black tape from the box and flipped it around a couple of times. He didn't find any labels nor did he find anything else in the box.

Instinct then kicked in and his brow furrowed as he looked at the plastic object in his hands. What was on the tape? Could it be a threat? A ransom note? A mission?

He disregarded that last thought as quickly as it came to mind, however, more and more possibilities developed replacing the last, and his grip on the cassette unconsciously tightened before he stood up and scanned his room for a tape deck. His eyes fell on the entertainment system not too far from him.

Quatre mentally thanked Duo for the gift as he crossed his room and quickly placed the tape into the player. He stood waiting for a good fifteen seconds before he heard a click and then a soft fizzing sound. His ears were listening so intently to the static that he gave a start when soft music began to play. As the synthesizer crescendo he found that he didn't recognize the song at all.

Used to be that I believed in something
Used to be that I believed in love

He was taken aback as the clear, rich voice filled the air, his mind barely registering that it was in English.

It's been a long time since I've had that feeling
I could love someone
I could trust someone

I said I'd never let nobody near my heart again darlin'
I said I'd never let nobody in

As the song bridged to the chorus Quatre found himself completely baffled.

Who would send him something like this? Who? Could it be just an admirer or...or what?

When the song ended and static ensued he became aware that he was now seated on the floor. For a while Quatre remained there head slightly bowed in thought. Only when the audible click echoed in the air signaling that the side of the tape was finished did he snap back to reality. He rose to his feet and pushed the eject button. Pulling out the tape, he studied it again, looking for any signs of-of anything that could clue him into figuring out who sent it to him.

He found nothing though, intensifying his confusion and fueling his curiosity.

Even as he replaced the tape back into its box and changed into his pajamas, the lyrics of the song wouldn't leave his mind nor did the image that posed itself the moment he heard the first verse and only strengthen on a particular verse later on.

Pulling the covers over him and turning off the lamp on his bedside, Quatre shuffled uneasily in the darkness, a million questions running across his mind, but only one really sticking.

Why did it make him think of Trowa?

* * * * *

Quatre tapped the steering wheel on his Ford mustang convertible, unconsciously singing softly under his breath. His eyes wandered for a moment away from the road and onto the tape player to his side before turning back again.

It was strange. He'd only heard the song once yet he already knew all the words.

Brushing a stray bang out of his vision when a particular hard wind blew it there, he pulled into the private parking lot of the airport. Although there were more than enough public transports, Duo insisted he flew everywhere himself-something about old habits dying hard. He knew what the other meant.

In any case, both were due to arrive in a few minutes and Quatre had made sure he would be there in time to meet them. Just as he made his way as close as possible to the runway, his sights met the black jet coming from the horizon. He shielded his eyes as the aircraft descended, fierce winds blowing by him from the force of the landing. Once the dust cleared he lowered his arm and made his way to the plane.

Attendants had already placed a convenient staircase leading to the jet's door moments before said door opened. Heero was the first to exit, clad in blue jeans and a white t-shirt and not long after did Duo follow, wearing his customary black attire. Each carried a duffel bag and nothing else.

Quatre greeted them both once they reached the pavement and after a bit of small talk involving the usual statements of "You look great" or "You haven't changed much", they headed for the blonde's car. Duo lagged behind for a bit, taking the time to toss his keys to one of the attendants still standing by and giving him specific instructions for his precious Shinigami 2. He called shotgun beforehand, not really believing that he would actually get it since Heero had gotten to the car before he did, but to his surprise Heero had indeed seated himself in the back. Not one to argue when opportunities such as these came about, he hopped into the front seat of the car and tossed his bag behind him, careful not to hit the ex-Wing pilot as he did.

"Some car you got here, Quatre," Duo admired from his seat, looking at all the features of the black convertible. "I'll have to get one of these."

"In about ten years at the rate you're going now."

Quatre blinked from his seat, hand paused midway from starting the car. Had Heero just made a sarcastic comment? A comment that could have also been considered a joke?

Duo didn't seem half as surprised as he was. In fact, it looked as if he was accustomed to it if not a bit annoyed by it. Quatre watched as the brunette twisted around, a little hard considering he was already buckled in, and examined Heero as if he were contemplating which response would fit appropriately in a situation like this.

Heero in turn disregarded the stare, opting to look out at the area around him; the slightest of smirks could be seen on his face.

Quatre couldn't help but chuckle a little at the exchange, which earned an intense "stop encouraging him" glare, before he turned the key in the ignition. Revving up the engine he proceeded to back the car out of the parking space before shooting it forward, an act resulting in an oomph escaping from Duo's mouth as he was crushed against his seat.

Pushing the gas pedal a bit more under his right foot, Quatre gave a sideways glance to the one beside him, the edges of a smile on his lips. "I really suggest you sit down properly, Duo. I don't wish to be pulled over for misconduct." After unbuckling himself Duo turned back around with a frown, crossing his arms across his chest.

"Ahem."

With great irritation Duo put his seat belt back on before looking out the car to his right, mumbling all the way. "...All against me..."

Feeling a tad guilty for his actions Quatre was about to apologize, only stopping himself when he saw a half smile appear on Duo's face as the boy stared into the side-view mirror. Quatre took a glance in his rear-view mirror and understood almost immediately as to Duo's abrupt change in demeanor.

Despite Heero's normal impassive expression, it was softer now. Almost serene-like as he watched the fast pace scenery go by.

Civilian life was really affecting Heero and in all the good ways.

Turning his attentions back to the road, Quatre turned onto the ramp leading to the highway, the mysterious package from the night before temporarily out of his mind and worries.

* * * * *

"Look out belo~~ow!"

With a resounding SPLASH Duo fell into the pool. Surfacing from the water he wiped his face before swimming to the edge of the pool, a grin plastered onto his features. Arms resting on concrete he looked around until he spotted Quatre lying in one of the lawn chairs nearby, black sunglasses on the bridge of his nose.

"Hey Quatre! Why don't you get in? The water's great!"

Removing his arms behind his head, Quatre planted them to his side and pushed himself up a bit before tipping down his sunglasses. Instead of answering he simply pointed behind the treading brunette. Duo blinked before turning around, just in time to see Heero's own amazing descent into the water. Needless to say, Duo got a mouthful of chlorinated water.

Sputtering, Duo brushed the water away from his face. Once his vision cleared he pounced, well as best as he could, onto the ex-Wing pilot. A raging water fight ensued and soon Quatre was pulled into it as well despite his wishes not to be...Well, he wasn't going to just let Duo douse him completely without receiving some retribution.

All three were in the water now and were too engrossed in their activities to hear the approach of an unexpected visitor. They wouldn't have noticed however, save for perhaps Heero, for this person prided himself on traveling everywhere undetected.

A throat was cleared.

"Heero! Why you-!"

Then again.

"Omae o-"

...and again.

"Du-ack!"

"KISAMA!"

All movement ceased upon hearing the familiar shout and three heads turned as one to a very annoyed teen standing beside the patio table.

Wufei eyed them all calmly, arms crossed over his Preventers' uniform. By his stance it was obvious that he wasn't just making a house call.

Quatre was the first to speak after lifting himself out of the pool. "What happened, Wufei?" A towel was tossed and Quatre caught it, eyes still trained to the Chinese youth.

Wufei turned on his heel, his back to them now. "We should discuss it inside." He inclined his head to the pool. "It doesn't concern you both, but if you wish, you may hear it as well."

The offer was as much incentive needed before both Heero and Duo hauled themselves out of the pool. After grabbing their own towels, all made their way to the house.

* * * * *

Toweling his hair, Quatre led them all into the kitchen. Once there, all took a place apart from the other in the room: Wufei by the counter. Quatre by the kitchen table. Heero by the phone against the wall. Duo by the patio doors.

Wufei leaned his back on the counter, closing his eyes briefly before opening them and focusing them on the Winner heir. "Another one of your laboratories has been destroyed. The Rocksford Research Lab. Cause was the same as the other: fire."

Quatre inhaled sharply on hearing the news. "Casualties?"

"Ten were reported with mild burns and other minor injuries. They'll be fine."

Quatre sat down, clearly relieved.

"Everything in the facility was destroyed," Wufei continued voice steady. "Because this is the second occurrence, I was notified to inform you that a thorough investigation would ensue at this point. As I speak, other Preventers are locating the origin of the fire and we will be directing all newfound information to you as we find it. We have yet to find the connection between the three fires but I assure you we will."

Quatre nodded stiffly, running a hand through his damp hair.

"Three fires?" Duo questioned, his voice clearly expressing his confusion. "I thought you said this only happened once before."

"There was a factory a week ago," Quatre supplied, before turning his attentions from Duo to Wufei, "but I thought that was determined as an accident."

Wufei nodded. "It was. We are only taking it into consideration since both laboratories were destroyed in fires." Wufei pushed himself off of the counter and rested his hands behind his back. "Quatre, if it is all right, I would like a copy of all activities taking place in both facilities. I'm sure you have the information."

Quatre stood up, tossing the towel over the backing of his chair. "I have them upstairs. I'll get them for you." With that said he walked out of the room, leaving the three remaining ex-pilots alone.

"What are your suspicions, Wufei?" Heero asked, eyeing the Preventer.

"To be honest with you Yuy," Wufei began moving to take a seat, "I haven't an idea, save for what, if any, irregular experimentations or activities occurring in the labs that may have caused the buildings to be destroyed. Both facilities were well respected and had the best of intentions in all their research. In fact, it was in one of these laboratories that the agent which allowed for the colony's people to reproduce was first developed."

One of Duo's eyebrows arched up with interest and he leaned back against the door, crossing his arms over his chest as he listened.

"As you know," Wufei continued, "when the first colonies were constructed, women who lived a difficult life in the unnatural environment of space suffered from abnormalities of the reproductive system. For a time, it became illegal to have children except as test tube babies. However, years later the Rocksford Research Laboratory had developed an agent that if inoculated would ensure the safety of women who wished to bear children (1).

"Of course it only worked for new women who traveled to the colonies, but after colony life became more stable, women who originated from the colonies soon adjusted save for a handful. This agent was only one of their successes, which is why it's very unfortunate for it to have been destroyed and is quite surprising if the lab has gone corrupt.

"As of now, I can't assume too much. There haven't been any indications of any possible motives for the destruction of these labs and this could well have been merely coincidental."

"Coincidental my ass," Duo remarked from his spot. "From my experiences nothing happens without reason."

"There is no doubt in my mind about that, Maxwell, but as of now nothing is pointing to it being otherwise."

Before Duo could reply Quatre had returned, a thick manila folder and two CDs in hand. He handed them both to Wufei. "This is all the information I received. The papers in the folder are mostly invoices and inventory reports. Is there anything else you need?" He finished the statement in one breath obviously eager to offer any assistance if needed.

Wufei flipped the folder open, skimming through a few pages before closing it again. "This is fine for now, Quatre. I'll call if I need anything else." He paused before motioning to the pool with his hand. "Sorry for disrupting your fun. I know you rarely get to enjoy yourself these days."

Quatre shook his head dismissively. "You don't need to apologize, Wufei. This is certainly more important and thank you for personally coming to tell me."

"It wasn't any trouble," Wufei replied, starting for the door. Quatre walked ahead and opened it for him.

"Don't be a stranger, Wufei!"

Wufei paused just outside the screen door. "Nice seeing you too, Duo. You as well, Heero."

Quatre waved as Wufei left on his motorcycle. Closing the door behind him, he leaned heavily on it, eyes closed. He really, _really_ hoped everything would turn out fine-that there was no conspiracy or whatnot occurring within Winner Incorporations. Things like these never occurred under his father's reign. Why when he gained control did it happen?

He winced as a shadow suddenly fell over his heart. One usually did when the merest thought of his father came to mind.

Two years have passed since...it happened, but the memory would be forever planted into his mind as would the repercussions it caused.

He shivered slightly as the thought of the Zero System came to mind. It had been a mistake. Constructing the Zero System was one of the many mistakes he made at the time. Destroying those stations, the colonies, fighting Heero ...almost killing Trowa-that would be the biggest mistake of all and that of which he regretted the most. It may not have seemed as significant compared to destroying that colony, but to Quatre it was. The turmoil and self-loathing he was in afterwards outweighed all other mistakes. No one could possibly understand his joy and relief upon hearing from Duo that Trowa was indeed alive. Even if Trowa had hated him for the rest of his life, just knowing that Trowa was alive was enough for him.

Quatre sighed. His thoughts always seemed to fall back on Trowa for some reason.

A slight pressure fell onto his shoulder and he opened his eyes.

Duo removed his hand and placed both behind his back. "You okay?"

Quatre nodded. "Aa. Just...thinking."

Duo rocked back and forth on his heels. "You do that too much you know."

Quatre smiled, standing upright now. "I know."

"Come on," Duo said, slinging his arm around the other's shoulder. "I want to see if I can surprise Heero and toss him into the pool. You with me?"

Quatre almost laughed. "Although it has the slightest chance of actually happening...why not?"

Duo grinned. "Now that's the spirit!"

Quatre did laugh this time as he was led back outside. He was really glad that Duo and Heero were over.

* * * * *

Quatre walked out of his bathroom, a towel wrapped around his waist and another drying his wet hair. He made his way to his dresser and pulled out a pair of boxers. After slipping them on he continued rubbing his head with the towel before flopping down onto his bed. He lay there for a while, staring up at the ceiling and doing not much else. He tilted his head to the side and let his eyes wander over to the clock on the nightstand.

11:10 p.m.

He couldn't believe how fast the day had gone; it seemed like he'd only picked up Heero and Duo a short while ago. Well, as the saying went: Time flies when you're having fun. The statement couldn't have been truer. His expression softened as he allowed his entire body to relax. He really needed this-a break that is-from work and just everything.

His gaze soon fell on the other objects on the small table and lingered for a moment on a photo of Heero, Duo, Trowa, Wufei and himself after the war. It was taken the day after he was released from the hospital and all received a copy. He smiled fondly at the memory before his eyes roamed again and stopped at the white box lying beside the lamp. He pushed himself up a bit, weight leaning onto the left of his body as he reached for it. After removing the tape he discarded the box to the side and lay back down. Looking up at it, he flipped it a couple of times.

He'd forgotten about it until now. Sitting up from his bed he walked across his room and placed the tape into the player. After pressing the play button he returned to his previous position on the bed. The flowing sound of the music began and he dug his head deeper into his pillow, eyes sliding shut. He wondered...wondered who sent it to him-_why_ it was sent to him.

Somehow ever since I've been around you
Can't go back to being on my own

Can't help feeling darling since
I've found you
That I've found my home
That I'm finally home

I said I'd never let nobody get too close to me darling
I said I needed, needed to be free

"Not you too~!"

Quatre started, eyes opening in surprise on hearing the groan. Turning his head to the left he saw Duo walking through his door, hair dripping. Quatre sat up. "What?"

Duo sighed dramatically, inviting himself to sit on the bed beside his friend. "Man! Sure it was a surprise when I heard Trowa listening to this stuff last week, but you too? _And_ the exact same song. Sheez." Duo fell back onto the bed despite his hair being wet and was now soaking the covers. "Small world huh?"

Quatre stared at the American, an intangible feeling swelling within his chest quite fleetingly before disappearing entirely. "Trowa?"

Duo nodded. "Yea. I bet you're surprised too huh? Didn't think Trowa liked this kind of music. Sure, Celine Dion isn't bad for a singer, but some of the songs are too sappy for my taste." Duo smiled. "I guess Trowa's a real softy at heart."

Quatre nodded automatically, not really listening. 'Trowa. Trowa listened to this music-this song...?'

~~Coincidental my ass. From my experiences, nothing happens without reason. ~~

Duo's remark from the conversation earlier just came to mind; he had heard it as he was returning to the kitchen.

Was this just a coincidence? It had to be. It couldn't...

"Oi, Ka. To. Ru."

Quatre blinked at the hand waving in front of him and found that Duo was now standing in front of him. When

Duo had gotten up, he wasn't sure. "Hm?"

"I said see you later. I have to go brush my hair before it tangles." Duo walked out the door, only to pop his head back through the doorway a second later. "Oh, sorry about your bed." Then he was gone.

Not realizing at first as to why he said that, Quatre leaned down. Only then did he understand what the other meant. Quatre sighed with a shake of his head as he stood up and removed an extra blanket from the closet to put over the damp spot on his mattress.

That done, he walked to the stereo.

If you asked me to
I'd let you in my life forever
If you asked me to

He listened to the remaining words of the song and an unexplainable bout of anger suddenly welled up inside of him and he swiftly reached out and turned the player off. His breath came out heavily now, his mind spinning. Something about the lyrics made his heart ache-the words cutting deeply into something that he wasn't even aware of being. He removed the tape then, almost violently and stared at it accusingly.

~~...it was a surprise when I heard Trowa listening to this stuff last week, but you too? _And_ the exact same song... ~~

Trowa...

~~Coincidental my ass. From my experiences nothing happens without reason. ~~

It couldn't be true!

Before he was aware of it he had thrown the tape across the room, the resounding bang it made when it connected with the wall ceased those few lines that kept coming to mind-lines telling him to do something he couldn't possibly do. He _couldn't_.

If you asked me to
If you asked me to

Why were these few simple words awakening something that he wasn't even aware of feeling? Why did they put into light something he never considered-something he _knew_ could never happen? What was going on...?

It was just a song, he reasoned, probably from a secret admirer or something...and yet...

Why did he only think of Trowa? Why Trowa of all people? Why didn't anyone else come to mind?

Trowa was his friend.

His _friend_.

Without meaning to his eyes began to roam about his room, seeing it as if for the first time. He never realized how lonely it was, how lonely he was. He still had his friends, family, and the Maganacs, but they were different. He needed...He wanted... He was sure he could live alone if he had to. He was so sure. He didn't need love that type of love anyway.

If a person did come along it would have been nice, but he wasn't looking. He had no motivation to look. Why look when he already had-

His thoughts came to a grinding halt, his eyes widening slightly.

Already have? He didn't already have anything. He slowly shook his head, hand rising to cover his eyes. What was he thinking...?

He let his hand drop and kept his eyes trained to the floor for an indiscernible amount of time. Eventually, he numbly made his way across the room. Bending down he picked up the cassette and ambled tiredly to his bed. He turned off the light and slipped into bed.

It would be a long while before he fell asleep.

* * * * *

The weekend passed rather quickly and soon both Duo and Heero were heading back to L2, leaving Quatre to resume his title as the head of Winner Incorporated. Yet the confident and quick witted characteristics that tied in with the position was lacking since his return, so much so, that many who worked alongside him were beginning to take notice. In the past, Quatre would have never allowed any personal issues to ever affect his professional persona and yet try as he might he wasn't able to just brush this one off.

It was frustrating to say the least.

He cradled his head in his hands, ignoring the many documents stacked on his desk that needed his attention. He couldn't do this anymore. Doris had that look in her eye, and he knew if it wasn't today then it would surely be tomorrow when she would corner him and attack him with a barrage of questions. And it was all because of that...that _stupid_ tape.

He glared at the said object laying a few inches in front of him but his glare soon dissolved into a frown.

It was just a song. A _song_. Why was it having such a hold on him? Why?

There really was only one thing to do and he knew what it was. He only needed to make a phone call. One phone call to Rei and she would be able to determine the tape's origin. It was so simple and yet, something kept holding him back from actually doing it. He knew what that something was as well and gripped the strands of hair that fell between his fingers more tightly as he finally allowed himself to admit it.

He was afraid.

For the first time since the war Quatre was truly and honestly afraid.

Calling Rei would mean no mistakes, no denials. Calling her would give him the facts whether he liked what they were or not.

Calling her could lead to the possibility that Trowa hadn't sent him the tape-that it _had_ been someone else all along.

He closed his eyes, effectively removing the tape from his sight and his thoughts resumed their run over and over again in his mind.

Did he like Trowa? Did he care for him in that way? He knew he held a special place in his heart for him, but was that love? Was it? He wasn't sure...

There was one thing he knew for certain however and it was the warm and comforting feeling he felt whenever he thought of Trowa, how those feelings seemed to wrap around him in a safe and soothing embrace.

Was that love?

Love, he frowned at the word. Was it even infatuation? A crush? He didn't know.

He didn't know, _still_ didn't understand why, but knew that deep down he _wanted_ Trowa to be the one, _needed_ him to be the person who sent it.

He was being foolish, he knew that as well. There was no solid basis that indicated Trowa out of the billions of people in the universe was behind it all. He was setting himself up for disappointment and yet...

There was a chance, as slim as it was and he just had to know.

He inhaled a deep breath, exhaling slowly as he reached over for his phone and dialed Rei's phone number.

...

"Hi Rei? I need you to do something for me..."

* * * * *

Quatre couldn't remember the last time he'd been so nervous. He was taking a big risk today and he wasn't sure if he was quite ready yet to go through with it. All the same, it didn't stop his legs from moving.

Despite her efforts Rei wasn't able to track the exact address from where the package was sent. The closest location she could find, however, was from which colony it was sent from. He had to reread the memo about ten times before he convinced himself that the words were not going to change on him.

L3. The package came from Colony L3.

A mixture of elation and dread had risen within him as he read (and reread) the words and he had to sit down.

A part of him hadn't allowed him to completely believe in this possibility which he supposed he did so to protect himself. Still, there was also that small part somewhere inside him that never allowed him to truly give up on that small hope-that urged him to believe. And it was true.

L3.

It was from L3.

_Trowa_ lived on L3.

He was crazy. He had to be. It would certainly explain why he had flown to the colony only two days later and was now wondering the grounds of the circus Trowa belonged to.

He hadn't seen Trowa yet, nor Catherine. He could leave right now and no one would be the wiser...and yet he was still walking. 'What did he hope for?' The more logical part of his brain asked, demanded of him. 'Humilation? Rejection? Pain?'

No, he hoped for none of those things. Closure? It seemed the most logical, but perhaps...perhaps he hoped just for the sake of hoping.

He found Catherine a few minutes later. She recognized him almost immediately, strange since they had only met twice before, and directed him to Trowa's trailer. He thanked her, a bit unnerved by the look she was giving him before heading in the direction she pointed out.

He was now standing in front of Trowa's door, hand poised in the air ready to knock, but it didn't seem to want to move. His other hand was in his coat pocket fiddling with the tape inside. Strangely enough feeling the smooth plastic between his fingers gave him the strength he needed and he knocked on the door.

He didn't move for those few seconds while he waited and it was during that short span of time his actions throughout the past week finally began to sink in. Even more than before he felt like running away because really...what was he doing? This was probably the stupidest and most illogical thing he had ever done in his entire life and all because of a-a cassette tape!

His ears began to pound with all the blood that suddenly decided to rush up to his head. He couldn't do this. What was he _thinking_? _Was_ he thinking?

He didn't hear the door open. He didn't hear his name being called. He missed the smile Trowa gave him upon seeing him. He did, however, feel the hand that settled on his shoulder giving him a slight shake.

He started, eyes focusing to see Trowa's worried face.

"Quatre, are you all right?"

He continued to blink uncomprehendingly before his senses slowly returned to him and he felt heat rise to his cheeks.

He hadn't blushed in ages.

"I-I'm fine," he stammered, shaking himself out of his daze. The worry didn't leave his friend's face and he managed a reassuring smile. "I'm fine, Trowa. Sorry, I was only lost in thought."

Trowa assessed him for a few more seconds before he finally allowed himself to relax. A few moments of awkward silence past before Quatre suddenly grinned, realizing how ridiculous they must have looked just standing here.

"I was just in the neighborhood," he explained, "and I thought I would stop...by...?" he let his voice trail off and looked up expectantly at Trowa, who in turn smiled before taking a step back and opening the door a bit more, motioning for him to come inside.

Quatre did so, the tension in his body easing slightly after leaping that hurdle, and began to take a look around once inside.

The room was plain, furnished with just the necessities and no other decorations save for two photographs resting on a small table beside a bed in the far corner. Nonetheless, he felt it suited Trowa. His eyes skimmed over the only two personal items in the room. One was of Trowa and Catherine standing in front of a large yellow tent, the latter's arms wrapped around the former's waist. Catherine was smiling brilliantly, while Trowa looked content. The second photograph was the exact same one he had on his own nightstand back home. Oddly, he felt comforted by this.

"Would you like to sit?" A voice spoke up from behind him and made him jump.

"Huh-Oh, yes!"

Trowa's eyes looked amused as he walked around him and Quatre mentally smacked himself over the head, feeling as his cheeks began to warm again. Why was he acting like such a teenager? Well, it could be because he _was_ a teenager. But honestly he could stand up to the most intimidating figures in the world and yet his self confidence plummeted now at all things.

He sighed, giving his head a swift shake.

But it wasn't just anything or anyone. This was Trowa.

He took a seat across his friend and asked the first thing that came to mind: how he was doing.

"I've been fine, I suppose." Pause. "And you Quatre?"

Quatre tried to keep his gaze on Trowa's but discovered he couldn't quite manage that feat what with how his stomach continued to do flips for no apparent reason he could fathom. Consequently, he took great interest in a potted plant to his left. "I'm okay as well. A bit more work than I expected, but nothing I can't handle."

"You're not overworking are you?"

The question surprised him and he shifted his attention back to the other. "No, I don't think so, but I have been told otherwise. Many times in fact lately," he laughed and Trowa seemed to relax at the sound, pointing out in his familiar soft timbre that he probably deserved it considering how he usually was when work was involved. He in turn quickly rose to defend himself, unaware of how his nervousness gradually started to melt away as the conversation went on-just like it used to when they talked during the war.

They continued their chat for the next hour discussing all that happened in their lives since the last time they saw each other. It was nice. The atmosphere around them was comforting and both were clearly at ease in each other's presence.

Their conversation eventually drew to a close and Quatre still had not mentioned anything about his true motives for coming here. The anxiety he thought had gone returned twofold and this was not lost to the circus performer.

"Are you all right, Quatre?" Trowa asked for the second time that day, seeing how he was fidgeting.

Quatre took in a deep breath to sooth his nerves. It was now or never. "Trowa...you didn't...send me a package about two weeks ago, did you?" he asked in as steady a voice he could manage and waited with baited breath, hands clenched firmly over his knees.

It took only a moment for Trowa to reply, but to him time seemed to suspend allowing him to watch the few expressions that splayed across Trowa's features before he answered.

Surprise.

Confusion.

Thoughtfulness.

Quatre knew his answer even before he spoke the words, wishing in that split second of perception that he hadn't come at all.

"Package? No."

Quatre looked down at his hands. Well. That was that. Trowa hadn't sent him the song. It wasn't Trowa. _Wasn't_ Trowa. He was disappointed, yes, but at least he knew now and that's what mattered. Right. He was glad that was out of the way. Now all he had to do was forget this entire, ridiculous ordeal. It shouldn't be too hard. No...it shouldn't be hard at all...

He forced a smile on his face, lifting his eyes and nodded faintly. "Mm, I thought so."

"What-"

"It's not important, Trowa," his voice came out in a rush, recovering its strength although he was unable to meet the other's eyes anymore and wasn't sure why. This was what he wanted, wasn't it? Confirmation. Closure. He waved the topic off entirely with a weak gesture with his hand. "Someone just sent me something, and there wasn't a return address, save for it coming from this colony. I had thought you had sent it, but I suppose I was wrong." His last few words held a melancholy tone, despite the amount of aloofness he attempted to maintain.

"Quatre?"

Quatre shook his head, standing up. "It really was nothing Trowa." This he stated firmly. "It's...late. I should be returning to my hotel."

After a few agonizing seconds Trowa finally gave a tentative nod and lead the other to the door. Opening it, Quatre stepped outside. He stopped on the top step, indecisive for a moment, but only for a moment, and turned around, a wavering smile upon his face. "I-It was nice seeing you again, Trowa. The next time you travel to L4, be sure to pay me a visit, okay?"

Trowa could only nod, still bewildered by his friend's behavior. "Aa. Of course."

Quatre did smile more sincerely this time and said goodbye again before leaving. He took seven steps away before he heard the distinct sound of the door closing behind him. The sound echoed loudly in his ears, physically making it impossible for him to take another step. Yet time still flowed on and reality took that moment to smash upon his senses.

'What did he expect?' he began to question himself once more, his fist closing over his chest as an aching pain blossomed there. 'A confession? His undying love for me? _Really_!' A bitter laugh escaped past his lips and he raised his other hand up meaning to rub his forehead but found to his surprise that he was holding the black cassette tape.

If you asked me to
If you asked me to

He curled his fingers around it, giving it one last long look before he dropped it on the ground.

Quatre walked away.

* * * * *

Trowa closed the door gently behind him and leaned against it. He was certain that something was undeniably wrong with Quatre, but he seemed resolute on not speaking about it. Saddened to some extent, Trowa moved away from the door and crossed his small floor and fell onto his bed. If Quatre wasn't ready to discuss it he knew not to pry, having been in the same position his friend was presently in on numerous occasions in the past.

That decided upon he rested his head on top his arms and stared up at his ceiling. It wasn't the most interesting of views, the metal curves, but he'd gotten used to it. He began to focus his thoughts on the performance tomorrow and the new act Catherine wanted him to do, but somehow he always found himself returning to the image of Quatre's retreating back and the unhappiness that lingered in those blue eyes when he had told him he hadn't sent him anything. He wondered what Quatre received that could have affected him so.

When he had woken up this morning he had no idea that Quatre would visit him later that day. It seemed a typical day enough: Wake up. Eat breakfast. Feed the animals. Rehearse. Eat lunch. Perform. Eat dinner. Return to trailer. He was surprised if not happy when he saw Quatre standing at his doorsteps where he thought Catherine or the ringmaster would be instead.

Yes, he was actually very happy to see the blonde. Something inside of him seemed to brighten upon seeing that familiar face, hearing that cheerful voice. He wasn't afraid to admit that he missed Quatre, but who wouldn't miss him?

To be truthful, he considered Quatre his first true friend and to this day continued to marvel on his luck of meeting the Arabian. They just seemed to "fit" together and there was never a time when he felt he couldn't trust or rely on the other to be there. He would even go so far as to say that if he knew fighting in the war would only result in gaining his friendship, he would willingly do it again. Some people would call him a fool for saying such things, but others, he hoped, would realize that despite the cruelties and bleekness of the world, it was possible for a person to make a particular bond so strong with another that it deserved to be treasured and fought for.

Gaze still focused upwards he reached a hand out and switched on his stereo. There was silence for a few seconds before the familiar chords of a soft melody filled the air.

He had to admit when Duo had first given him this tape he was skeptical. He wasn't really the sentimental and romantic music type of person. Still, he found most of the songs on the cassette rather touching, especially the lyrics to the first song. He closed his eyes, feeling the edges of his lips curve up and allowed the song to play itself out in his room.

But if you asked me to
I just might change my mind
And let you in my life, forever
If you asked me to
I just might give my heart
And stay here in your arms forever
If you asked me to
If you asked me to

A soft rapping knocked him out of his thoughts and his eyes blinked open. He heard the knocking again and made his way to the door wondering if it would be Catherine this time wishing him a good night's sleep. He opened his door and was surprised yet again to see Quatre at his doorstep. "Quatre?" He looked the other over more closely, his concern over him reaching record-breaking levels. However, Quatre looked more like himself this time around, more confident, but he could still see a trace of hesitation in his movement.

"Trowa..."

The song continued to play in the background and he blocked it out of his mind, focusing solely on the one standing in front of him.

Ask me to, I will give my world to you baby
I need you now
Ask me to, I'll do anything for you baby, for you baby

When Trowa told him he hadn't sent the package, he didn't know what to do. He couldn't think past the fact that Trowa didn't send him the tape.

And so, he ran.

He had walked as far as the entrance before he started back, knowing-_knowing_ that if he ran away now, he would never have the courage to come back and do whatever it was he felt he needed to do.

It wasn't closure he wanted, or even knowing the origins of the tape. Somewhere along the way he began to care less and less about that. Right now he just wanted to understand; he wanted to know what he felt towards Trowa, if anything at all, and the only way to do that required him to be here with him. And so...here he was.

"I know I have been acting rather strangely," his words were spoken carefully, faltering on the next few but only momentarily and he steeled himself before taking that extra leap, "But...would you mind if we...talk a little bit more? There's...There's a few things I need to say and need to talk to you about."

If you asked me to
I'd let you in my life forever
If you asked me to

Time stretched once more as he waited, watching Trowa carefully.

Surprise, before an unquestioning smile and a slight inclination of his head. "Of course."

He released the breath he held and revealed a tentative smile as he reentered Trowa's trailer.

There would be no confessions, no passion-laced vows, and certainly no "I love you's." But what would be said tonight promised a start, of what he was not certain, but for now it was enough.

And he couldn't have asked for more.

The End

"If You Asked Me To"
Written by Diane Warren
Sung by Celine Dion