Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Kaifuku ❯ Chapter 3

Status: Betaed by Avatar-chik.

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Kaifuku

Ch. .3.

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Hiiro's struggle against the water had raised so much noise that lights turned on in a few of the boats.

Loud steps were heard running across the pier, and then, a loud splash echoed in the night as a man jumped into the water.

People stood on the pier in their nightgowns, looking worriedly at the dark water. One man aimed a large flashlight at the river. The beam scanned the black water for several minutes until a man suddenly emerged from the river with a loud gasp. He took a few deep breaths and dove back in.

A moment slowed into an eternity. Then, the man resurfaced, holding a teenage boy in his arms. The crowd gasped.

Nicolai panted harshly as he struggled to swim the unconscious Hiiro to shore. A few minutes later, he managed to arrive to the edge of the pier, which stood high above the water.

"Here lad, let me give ya a hand," the Irishman with the flashlight called from above.

Nicolai looked up. Panting, he lifted Hiiro so the man could pull him up to the pier. Once Hiiro was safe on shore, two more people helped him climb up as well.

Hiiro lay motionless on the slick pier, a small crowd surrounding him. Despite his exhaustion, Nicolai hurried to the boy's side.

"I don't think he's breathing," a woman whispered worriedly.

Nicolai said nothing and immediately began performing CPR.

The crowd watched with anxiety until a loud watery cough came out of the boy's throat. Hiiro curled and retched out water, coughing and gasping for air. The crowd sighed with relief. ()

"You gave us quite a scare, lad!" One man laughed in relief.

Nicolai looked worriedly at the coughing teen, not even smiling.

Gradually, Hiiro calmed and his breathing slowed. He looked up at the man kneeling by his side.

"What the hell were you trying to do?!" Nicolai demanded.

Hiiro stared, his features blank. "Gu-Gundam ga... umi ni aru..." (Gundam… at sea...) He mumbled weakly, and passed out once more.

Nicolai stared sadly at the boy, his eyes now shimmering with compassion. He sighed and scooped him up into his arms.

"You better get him warm, quick," a woman said, a hand over her heart, "and make sure this sleepwalker stays in bed this time!"

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Trembling, he trashed against the covers. He was hot and cold, all at the same time. He was sweating and shivering. His body felt weak, lying heavily on the bed; coughing, panting, soaking the sheets with sweat.

"...Odin…?" He whispered weakly into the darkness, hoping for a reply. He was scared because he didn't know where he was or what had happened. His body was heavy and numb, refusing to move. Warm sheets were wrapped around him but he was still cold. His arm and leg hurt a lot.

He didn't remember anything after the fall. The tree branch suddenly gave way under him and he fell. It was dark when he awoke. His head felt funny and his body really hurt. He was thirsty too.

"Nodo ga kawaita... Kibun ga warui..." (I'm thirsty... I don't feel so good…)

"Shh... anshinshite," A voice whispered back and a hand caressed his moist forehead. "netsu ga aru node yasunde kure." (Relax. You're running a fever so please rest)

Relief washed over him. He was worried that Odin wouldn't come back for him after he screwed up the mission by falling. He was supposed to keep watch from the tree and tell Odin about the target, but then the branch gave way...

"Ninmu wo... kanryou shita no?" (Did I... accomplish... the mission?) He mumbled tiredly, trying to open his eyelids but they were too heavy to lift.

"Hai, kanryou shita. You nailed it, kiddo," Odin whispered back, sounding tired. "Too bad you didn't pick a better tree. You would have saved me a hell of a lot out of these hospital bills."

"Gomen..." (sorry) the child sighed, half asleep.

"You broke your arm and leg, and you have a nasty cut across your other arm. They had to do some stitches."

"Stitches-te... nani?" (what are stitches?) He asked with a slight hint of panic in his voice. The word sounded scary.

"Never mind, don't worry about it. Just try not to move around so much, okay?"

"Mmm..." he managed to softly reply, drifting to sleep. He was warm, comfortable, and he was safe now that Odin was by his side. He wanted to open his eyes to look at the man, but he was so tired...

"Shh... it's okay, get some sleep."

A hand touched him lightly on the forehead.

He jerked up, startled. He looked around, sweat trickling into his eyes, but all he saw was a blurry figure reaching towards him. He drew back, panicked and alert.

"Hiiro, it's okay. It's just me, Nicolai. You're running a fever; lie down."

The world shifted and swirled around him as past, dream and present mixed into one blurry haze. It was confusing, and yet somehow, it made perfect sense.

A pair of hands gently guided him back onto the pillow. He lay down and shivered.

"Are wo mitsuketa ka?" (Did I find it?) he whispered into the dark. "Ninmu wo kanryou shita... ka?" (Did I complete the mission?)

"There's no mission, Hiiro. No Gundams, no nothing," a voice replied sorrowfully.

"Sou ka..." He tried to open his eyes, but the fever allowed him to see only darkness. When he closed them again, he saw the dark pit and Zero's eyes waiting for him at the bottom. He sighed mournfully, grieving for his metalic companion, abandoned somewhere beyond his reach.

Finally exhausted, he surrendered to the warmth around him and allowed it to soothe him into slumber.

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It was daytime when he finally awoke. He was warm, his skin still moist with sweat, but otherwise he felt better.

He tried to remember something, anything, but his mind came up blank. He knew something had happened, but he wasn't sure what it was. Something big and dangerous; a battle perhaps? Had he been injured? What about the other pilots? Did Zechs get to them too?

No, wait. He self-destructed, right? He didn't let them capture the Gundams. He called their bluff on the Colonies. He... he should be at the circus, right? No? Where then? It was dark.

"Hiiro?"

Struggling to open his eyes, Hiiro blinked against the soft sunlight filling the cabin.

"Hiiro, can you hear me?" Nicolai was leaning over him, looking deeply into his eyes. Behind the man, Hiiro could see the note that was still on the ceiling: 'Your name is Hiiro. You woke up from a coma. You are on a boat with me, Nicolai. You're safe.'

Yes, he remembered now.

Realizing he'd been staring dumbly at the man, who still waited for an answer, Hiiro nodded an affirmative.

"How are you feeling?"

He cleared his throat, testing his voice. "Ill."

Nicolai nodded, a grim smile on his lips. "Yes, well, because of that moonlight swim of yours, you're now running a high fever."

Hiiro continued to stare and Nicolai sighed softly.

"Hiiro, you jumped into the river in the middle of the night. Do you remember that? What were you thinking?"

Hiiro blinked. He hadn't been thinking at all. He simply... he simply needed to get to his Gundam. But... how could he have reached it from there?

"I... left Wing at sea..." He tried to explain, but it didn't even make sense to him, let alone Nicolai.

"Hiiro, the war is over and has been so for over nine months. You helped end it, remember? You destroyed your Gundam, Wing Zero. Do you remember?"

"Of course I remember," he hissed angrily, "Don't take me for a fool."

Nicolai sighed, shaking his head. "It's okay if you're confused. Like I told you before, the doctors warned me that there might be some brain damage; even amnesia."

That, earned the man a glare. "I don't have brain drainage!"

"Damage."

"That's what I said! Don't patronize me! Do you know who I am?! Kodomo janai! Gunjin da! I'm Gundam pilot Zero One! Chikyuu ga nido tsuketa! Coronii mo!" (I'm not a child! I'm a soldier! ... I saved the Earth twice! The Colonies too!)

He hadn't meant to shout, but it just burst out of him. He couldn't control it. The electric sparks were everywhere in his head, burning hot and angry. He felt them bounce off a few hurtful memories that awoke with a furious roar. The Sparks rebounded with glee and ran amok for a while. When he tried to get them in order, they ran around frenziedly until they hit a wall. The wall wouldn't budge and The Sparks sizzled angrily.

Nicolai sat down at the edge of the bed and looked at Hiiro seriously. He seemed unaffected by teen's outburst.

"Hiiro, why did you just speak to me in Japanese?"

"It was English," Hiiro corrected. He looked away, unsure of it himself.

"No, it was Japanese. It wasn't the first time you spoke Japanese to me."

"It was not! And besides, why should I learn English?! I'm just a little boy and you should learn my language, not the other way around! Baka!" The Sparks cheered him for the comeback, and jeered at the part of him that wanted them to stop.

Nicolai didn't even flinch. He simply asked, "Hiiro, how old are you?"

That snapped him straight back into reality. The Sparks switched off in a flash. He turned to look at Nicolai, confused.

"What? I... I don't know..."

"Around seventeen?" The man guessed, raising an eyebrow.

"I suppose..." Hiiro mumbled, looking away. Something was wrong with him...

"Then why did you just refer to yourself as a little boy?"

"I... I... don't know..."

"You're confused. It's okay; these things happen after a major head trauma."

Head trauma. Wing Zero crashed to the ground. He crawled out of it. He tried to kill that little redheaded girl. He fell and Relena caught him. Brain drainage—no, damage! Brain DAMAGE! From the crash? Wing Zero crashed... He fell to the floor... Relena caught him... then she left him with this man... Nicolai. He was with Nicolai who took care of him and...

"Hiiro?" The man's voice once again swept him away from the circle of thoughts. What was happening to him? He couldn't control his own mind!

"What's... wrong with me?" He asked as he turned to look at the man. "Odin..."

"Hiiro, my name is Nicolai."

"Yes, I know..." he mumbled, shaking his head weakly, "I'm sorry, I know... but I... don't know. I'm tired..."

Hiiro sighed and rolled over to face the wall. He pulled the blanket up to his neck, closed his eyes and fell asleep.

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There was still light in the cabin when he opened his eyes again. A skylight let the sunshine in from the center of the room. The light was dim, probably the afternoon sun. He watched gray clouds crawl across a pinkish blue and yellow sky.

His stomach rumbled and he felt sticky with sweat. He needed a shower, and food, and maybe some fresh air. He was tired of sleeping. All he ever did was lie in bed. He wanted out of the room, anywhere. Anything but staying in bed and feeling like an incompetent cripple. ()

He saw a bathrobe waiting for him on the bed across the room. There was also a pair of slippers on the carpeted floor. He moved slowly out of bed and slipped into the robe. It was thick and warm and he was grateful for its protection against the cold.

Once dressed, he looked around for a way out of the room. He could hear steps from above, probably Nicolai walking across the upper deck. When he gazed up at the skylight above him, he could see the man passing by it.

Turning to the door, he slowly approached it. He spread the palms of his hands against the cold wooden door and tried to push it open. It didn't budge. Frowning, he tried again, but the door wouldn't move no matter how hard he pushed it.

Panic began to rise and he banged against the door. He punched it until it rattled, but it still wouldn't open. He was locked in! Nicolai locked him there like a prisoner! He had been captured!

"Doa wo akero!" (Open the door!) He screamed, battering against the door in a frenzy. "Dase! Dase!!!" (Let me out!)

The Sparks were running amok in his head, scattering into every direction as if trying to escape. They bumped against his skull and shrieked with the anger of being confined. They bounced around his mind, hitting every single memory he had of being trapped, imprisoned, held captive and abused. The Sparks knew exactly where to hit, what pain to evoke to make Hiiro feel as trapped as they were. They started a chain reaction of one memory after another. A tidal wave of claustrophobic panic overtook the teen and he banged forcefully against the door.

From above, Nicolai's feet pounded against the ceiling as he ran.

Hiiro whirled around to look at the skylight. He was sure that Nicolai could hear him. "Get me out of here - do you hear me?! LET ME OUT!!!" He shouted at the window, his blue eyes frantic.

"Nicolai - I won't be your prisoner - do you hear me?!"

The door whooshed open with a bang.

Nicolai stood wide-eyed and panting in the doorway.

"Hiiro!" He called and the teen swirled around to face him.

"The door was unlocked, you could've opened it!"

"I tried, but you locked me in, you bastard!" The Sparks sizzled madly, burning and scourging his mind.

Nicolai frowned, and his eyes narrowed as he examined the teenager's reddened fists. He looked back at Hiiro's face. "Did you try using the doorknob?"

In one split second, The Sparks switched off like a television set. Logic resurfaced from the clutter.

Hiiro stilled, his breath caught in his throat. The doorknob; of course. Why hadn't he thought of that?

Noting that the teen had quieted in shame, Nicolai gave him a kind smile. "It's all right, no harm done."

"I apologize," Hiiro said calmly, gazing at the floor. "I didn't realize..."

"It's not a problem, really," the man assured, "You can sit in the living room if you'd like."

He nodded, still confused, and followed Nicolai out of the room.

"I'll make you something warm to drink."

Nodding his head for a 'yes', Hiiro walked up the few steps that led to the living area while Nicolai stayed in the kitchen. He looked around the boat, gazing out of the windows surrounding him. They were moored in a different port and the sun was already setting into the great river.

He settled on one of the couches. Shivering, he wrapped his arms around himself to get warm. Nicolai served him a cup of tea and sat down on the opposite sofa.

"Thank you," Hiiro let out softly and reached for his drink.

"You're welcome," the man replied, amused by the sudden politeness. He allowed the boy to sip his drink in silence before speaking again.

"I made arrangements for you to speak with Relena."

Hiiro looked up, surprised. "You have?"

Nicolai nodded and leaned back more comfortably on the couch, spreading his hands in both directions. "Yes, she will be available for a call this evening. You'll be able to speak with her in an hour or so."

Speak with Relena... what should he say?

"She was quite pleased to hear that you've woken up from your coma."

Hiiro did not reply and merely stared at his tea.

"You can also ask her about me, if you'd like."

Yes, yes, that's why he wanted to speak with Relena. Now he remembered. He wanted to know why she left him with this stranger. Oh, that reminded him-

"Where are we headed?" He asked, looking suspiciously at Nicolai.

The man shrugged. "Just up and down the river. I didn't plan a course exactly, just waited for you to wake up."

"Do you live on this boat?"

Nicolai shook his head and then smiled. "No, but it's home away from home," he explained, "I live in a city not far from the river. We'll head back there when you're ready."

"Ready for what?" Hiiro frowned, distrustful. Was this man going to use him for some ploy?

Nicolai didn't answer. Instead, he got up and went to the kitchen. "I'll get started on dinner. We need to get some real food into you. I hope you like spaghetti and meatballs."

Hiiro got up as well, his robe dangling off of his slim frame. It was about two sizes too big. "I need to shower," he said, rather demandingly.

"Of course," Nicolai replied from the kitchen, "The lavatory is also a shower. You pull the showerhead out of the sink."

"Convenient," Hiiro muttered and walked down towards the lavatory door, across from the kitchen. He glared at the doorknob as if it had committed a crime and then reached to open it. It opened without trouble.

"Hiiro," Nicolai called before he stepped in. Hiiro turned to face him.

"There's a clean towel under the sink, and the soap is right there for you to see. Do you need any help taking your clothes off?"

"No," Hiiro grunted and stepped into the bathroom.

He pulled out a white towel from a closet under the sink and turned to examine the various bottles of soap. There was a shampoo bottle and shower gel. Easy enough. He closed the shower curtain to cover the door and turned to pull out the showerhead from the sink. Then he remembered he had to take his robe and slippers off. “Baka (Idiot),” he berated himself.

After adjusting the water temperature, he stepped under the showerhead and closed his eyes, thankful for the warm water. He opened the bottle of shower gel and smeared it all over his pajama shirt.

A shirt? Oh no! He hadn't taken his pajamas off! He was showering with his clothes on! How could that happen? Was he stupid or what? How could he forget to take them off???

Angry, he struggled to take the wet clothes off and threw them into the sink. He was a fool, a damned, retarded fool! Who showers with their clothes on?! Not even children!

He finished showering, toweled himself off and slipped back into his robe. He hurried out of the bathroom and into his room, shutting the door behind him before Nicolai could start asking any questions.

He lay on the bed, his wet hair dripping water onto the pillow. He lay still and stared ahead numbly. If he'll lie motionless, he won't have to use his screwed-up brain and then everything would be fine.

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A while later, Nicolai knocked on the door. "Hiiro, dinner is ready. Would you like to eat with me in the living room?"

Hiiro opened his eyes and blinked. It was later in the evening and the room was dark. He was still lying on the bed in his bathrobe, cold and shivering. He sighed and pushed himself up.

Slowly, he stepped out of the room and into the kitchen. Nicolai turned to look at him. "Didn't you get dressed? I left some fresh clothes on the bed for you."

Hiiro blinked, mind numb. He hadn't even noticed.

"Go get dressed; I'll put the food on the table."

Without a word, Hiiro turned and went back into the room to dress. When he switched on the lights, he saw that the clothes were indeed lying on the bed opposite of his. They were arranged in a neat row in the order he was supposed to put them on. He would have complained about it, but it made it easier to remember what came first. There was also a pair of socks. He put them on and stepped back into his slippers.

Silently, he went back to the living room and sat by the table where a hot meal was awaiting him.

"Do the clothes fit you all right?" Nicolai asked as he poured the teen some hot tea.

Hiiro nodded and began to eat, rolling the spaghetti on his fork. He did it for a while, rolling and unrolling the spaghetti on the fork, for he found it oddly amusing.

Halfway through the meal, a phone rang. Nicolai hurried to reach for the mobile phone. "It's probably for you," he said and handed it to Hiiro.

He answered the call. "Hai?"

"Hiiro? Hi, it's Relena." A distant and familiar voice responded.

"Yes, I know."

"I'm so happy to hear your voice. I was afraid that you might never wake up."

Hiiro remained quiet, searching for words. There was an awkward silence for a few moments before Relena continued.

"Some of the other pilots asked about you after they saw the news reports..."

"What news reports?"

"There were... never mind, it doesn't matter. It's all water under the bridge. The important thing is that you're well. How are you doing, Hiiro?"

"Fine," he said simply, "Tired."

"I'm sure. Is Nicolai treating you well?"

Hiiro frowned. "Why wouldn't he?"

"No, I just mean it as a—"

"Who is he Relena? Why did you put me in his care?"

"Hiiro, I did what I thought was in your best interest. They were about to pull the plug on you; Nicolai was the only person who offered me another solution."

"Solution to what? Speak plainly to me!"

From the other side of the line, Relena sighed. "I couldn't afford your treatments, Hiiro. And the government no longer wished to offer financial support. There was a big debate about whether or not you should be allowed to live..."

"People wanted me dead?"

"Yes, and nothing I said could convince them otherwise," Relena whispered with a trembling voice. "Your chances were slim anyway; no one thought you'll ever wake up."

"Did you?"

She didn't answer, and that was enough of an answer. He sighed. She should have allowed them to kill him. Now he had to handle living all over again.

"Hiiro, I hope you can forgive me," she finally said, "Nicolai approached me; he came out of nowhere and said... he wasn't very clear why, but he said he wanted to take care of you. I had no choice but to trust him; they would have killed you."

"I see," Hiiro muttered, looking up at Nicolai who sat across the table.

"I'm so sorry... I have to go. I'm always so busy... I'll be in Ireland next month; maybe I'll see you then. Take care, Hiiro. I wish you well;" she said sadly. Without replying, Hiiro hung up the call.

Nicolai reached to take the phone from Hiiro and put it aside.

"Do you trust me now?" He asked, looking intently at Hiiro.

"No," Hiiro replied, "But what other choice do I have?"

Nicolai sighed heavily and turned to look out the window. "Well, I suppose I can settle for the benefit of the doubt."

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Hiiro lay in bed, staring at the note hanging above him. He kept reading it over and over, just to pass the time. It was late at night and he couldn't sleep. For once, he was awake, his mind finally clear. He felt in control of his own thoughts, at long last, and he feared that if he would go to sleep, the control would slip away from him again.

And so, he simply lay in bed with his hands behind his head, staring at the note above. He kept staring at his name, which didn't feel like it was his at all. The note was a clear and simple evidence of his condition. His identity wasn't his to begin with, that's why it kept slipping away from him whenever his brain started acting up.

The note was also a perfect reminder of his incompetence. He understood the importance of the note, but it still angered him to know he needed it in the first place. Without the note he might one day wake up without remembering where and when he was, and might do something stupid again. He might even hurt Nicolai. He was surprised at himself that he hadn't done that already.

For some reason, he trusted the man to some extent. At the very least, he trusted him while he was able to think straight. The man did rescue him from drowning, and he did, apparently, take care of him while he'd been comatose. In essence, he had no other choice but to trust the man. What else could he do? Where could he go in his condition? He'd get lost the moment he steps out of the boat.

Sighing, Hiiro turned to lie on his side and stared at the wall. He listened to the boat's fenders pound against the craft with each wave. Nicolai went to bed an hour earlier and the boat was very quiet. The silence did him good; he closed his eyes and simply relaxed.

Just as he was drifting to sleep, he heard noises from above. His eyes snapped open. Someone was walking on the upper deck of the boat.

His body tensed with alertness. He rolled over to lie on his back again and gazed up at the skylight. The window only displayed the black night's sky. No one was passing across the bow. Still, he could hear footsteps somewhere behind. The night was so silent that he could easily pick up any sound.

It might be only Nicolai tending the boat. But then again, Nicolai did inform him that he was going to bed. Could the person above be some sort of an invader? Were they being chased by someone? Is that why they were on a boat, always on the move? It did make sense... Relena did mention that some factions wanted him dead. Was someone there to carry out the sentence?

He didn't know what to feel about that. On one hand he was tense and ready to fight them off, but then on the other hand, he was willing to accept his fate without resistance. There was no point in fighting now that the war was over. Who was he to refuse a death sentence? He deserved it more than anyone else.

He decided to step outside and see what would happen. As he quietly got out of bed, he made up his mind not to resist if there was indeed an assassin looking for him.

Very slowly, he exited his small bedroom and made his way across the living area. When he reached the staircase (more like a ladder) leading to the upper deck, he stopped. Some doubts regarding his resolution still lingered. Perhaps he shouldn't just step out there like a sheep into a slaughterhouse. Should he offer some kind of resistance? Was his life worth at least that much?

He looked up at the glass door at the top of the stairs. He saw a dark figure standing on the deck, smoking. The figure was wearing a black coat that hid him in the darkness, but the cigarette was giving him away. It was odd. No assassin would take a cigarette break in a middle of a mission. Even Odin, who occasionally favored a smoke, waited until the mission was over.

Looking at the figure again, Hiiro noted something else. The man was holding a phone to his ear.

"Hey, it's me," he heard the man say rather quietly. Hiiro had to strain in order to hear him.

"Yes, I know, it's been a while since my last call. Things have been kind of hectic around here."

Now Hiiro recognized the voice; it was Nicolai. Why was he sneaking around at night to speak on the phone?

"Yes, I can talk. He's asleep," Nicolai continued. Hiiro's fists clenched with accumulating rage. The man was sneaking around! Who was he reporting to?!

"We're mooring at Lanesborough at the moment. We'll be heading to Athlone in the morning."

Hiiro tried to remember the navigation charts he'd seen, but his memory wasn't what it used to be. The names meant nothing to him. He felt like he was in uncharted territory and the helplessness angered him even more.

"I think it's too early to head back. He's not ready for it yet," Nicolai continued with a sigh and took a long drag from his cigarette.

Ready for what? What were they planning to do with him? He wasn't some tool! He didn't want to be a part of anything! Not anymore. He had done enough already!

"I know you want me back as soon as possible, but until I know it's safe to bring him with me, I can't come back." There was a short silence and then, "If we don't have his trust, then everything we worked for will go to waste, you know that."

That was all the confirmation he needed. Nicolai was planning to use him for some ploy. It made sense. What other reason would the man have to approach Relena out of nowhere and ask to take care of him? People didn't do things out of pure kindness; there was always some dark motive behind things. Like Odin, who had taken him in as a child but still taught him to kill. Like Doctor J who took him off the streets after Odin had died, but only to train him into a terrorist. Now this man was taking care of him in order to get something out of him too. No more! He will break out of that circle once and for all!

"I'm hoping that it will only take another week or so, and then I'll be able to tell him everything. With any luck, he'll accept it."

Oh, there was a slim chance of that happening, Hiiro decided. He wasn't willing to accept any kind of job Nicolai was planning to offer him, no matter how just the cause might seem. He'd seen enough 'just' battles to know better. There was no such thing as a 'just death'.

He'll make his escape first thing in the morning.

"Don't worry; given time, I think Hiiro will agree to join us."

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Cold water slows down the oxygen depletion of the brain. Brain death at normal temperatures are around 8-10 minutes before the brain cells die. At colder temperatures, the brain dies more slowly, 20-45 minutes and the body can be resucitated at longer intervals.

No offense meant at the handicapped! These are Hiiro's thoughts not mine. Gomen. ^^;