Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Mistaken Words ❯ Picking up the Pieces ( Chapter 27 )

[ T - Teen: Not suitable for readers under 13 ]

Mistaken Words

Thanks to both my editors!!!! Pious Knight neekabe you guys are the best!!!!

Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing

Picking Up the Pieces

John released a breath he had been holding for far too long as he finally entered Heero's room. Little of his day was spent feeling relief over the care Heero was finally receiving; he just couldn't shake the outrage he had felt when Luc had come in taking over. What purpose was there in making this boy's already meagre existence a further hell? It was cruel and unjust, as all of this had been since John had entered into it. Despite sleep John couldn't help but feel utterly exhausted at the whole situation. This was not what he had signed on for, but at the very same time he was at least glad that he could be there for the boy during this horrible time.

His eyes were instantly locked upon Heero's unmoving form. Fresh clothes and clean bandages were the first things John took note of as he walked over to the boy's side. His skin still looked dingy and his hair remained limp about his face, but he had not really expected Sally and Luc to pay that much attention to details, they were after all being forced to give him these basic cares. Heero no longer wore a shirt but his ribs had been carefully bound, which John was pleased to see. It wasn't as though the boy was going to be doing any major moving soon, but still best to rule out the chance of a bone turning inwards and puncturing a lung if the boy was to flinch or shift.

Heero's eyes were closed and he appeared to be sleeping soundly, something John had not been expecting when he had entered the room. He had spent his ride over trying to prepare himself for what he might find on enter the room. Luc had been getting more creative with each passing day, so to find the boy apparently unharmed allowed John to breathe yet another sigh of relief. He wanted to better see what had been done for Heero, but at the same time he didn't want to alarm the boy; he'd wake him with his touch. So he gently called out to the boy, “Heero?” he was given no response, and so he slowly reached out his hand to touch Heero on the shoulder. Receiving yet again no reaction, John moved his had to the Japanese boy's head, feeling for the fever that had been there in the morning. He could still feel an abnormal heat to the Heero's forehead, but at least it didn't seem to have risen any more.

Slowly John made his way around the boy, inspecting everything that had been done for him. Despite Sally's reluctance to assist the boy, she had still done a good job. His wounds were well looked after, and now properly bandaged, for the moment at least eliminating the chance of further infection. Finished his inspection John stood for several minutes just looking at Heero while he slept. He should have been utterly relieved to walk in for once and not have the boy jumpy with his nerves completely strung out. But he couldn't seem to shake the feeling that notwithstanding Heero's present condition something had happened, and he had a good deal of precedence to base that assumption on.

There was only one way to either prove his theory or be pleasantly surprised, and that was by checking the surveillance records for the day. Seating himself behind the desk, John cast one last look at Heero's sleeping form before focusing on the screen. Remembering the rough time that he had been forced to leave, John began his search there. Turning the volume up a little so he could better hear what was being said John continued, horrified at how callously Heero was treated. Yet considering the six days that Heero had been here, and his treatment through that time, John didn't know why anything should surprise him now. He felt his stomach drop away when the interrogators entered the room, but felt a wash of relief as nothing significant happened to the boy.

John briefly glanced away from the screen to check Heero's stats and once more give him a quick visual sweep before returning his attention to the day's unfolding events. He blinked in surprise at something tiny that flashed in the room's lights quickly before it was gone. “What was that?” John whispered searching for a better angle that he might get a closer look. Whatever it was it had come at the moment Trowa had turned his back on Heero, refusing to hear the boy out. That angered John, still he tried to see the situation from the other boy's eyes. Heero had tired to kill Relena, someone Trowa was just as responsible to protect as Heero had once been.

Looking closer John watched in stunned silence as the singular tear tracked its way down the side of Heero's face, and his eyes lost what little light they possessed. Had those words really effected Heero that much? Could have been really expecting to be hear anything different, considering the last three years? John didn't know how to feel at that moment. From the time he had been thrown into this situation, John had decided that the boy's past actions would have no effect on how he chose to treat him. All he could bring himself to see was someone in desperate need of a friendly face, someone would might actually care about his well being. And he had not problem being that very person for Heero.

Hearing a groan escape him, John made to stand and go to the boy, but couldn't seem to tear his vision from the frozen image of Heero, rejected by a former comrade.

Heero stood, surrounded in utter blackness. It was so vast and altogether consuming that Heero's wasn't even sure he stood. As far as he could tell he might very well have been floating in a sea of nothingness, and yet Heero still had the distinct feeling that he was standing upon familiar ground. He blinked hoping to clear away the blackness that he could almost feel close in around him. Slowly it seemed to part as though drawn away like a heavy curtain, and Heero's cobalt eyes were met with a nightmare.

He realised instantly that he was asleep, and he wondered when he had relaxed, when he had allowed himself to pass from the prison he had enclosed himself in. But none of that really mattered now, he was here, facing the sole event in his life he feared to re-live. The auditorium fell away before him hundreds of seats positioned upon its floor so that everyone might be able to listen to the important speeches. And there he stood in one of the many balconies not in use for this day's events. The walls on either side of the auditorium slanted inwards towards the stage putting his position almost exactly behind the balcony before him, while still offering a clear view of the stage below.

Even in dream every detail of both the day and place that it took place were etched sharply in Heero's mind. Time would never blur the lines of what happened back then, the only time he could hope to fuzz them out a little was with the help of alcohol, something he did not have at his disposal here. Heero already knew there was no fighting this, the events of that day would play themselves out as sharply and as surely as they had three years back.

The smooth familiar feel of his gun held tightly in his right hand caused bile to rise in the back of Heero's throat, but he forced it back. He had to do this for the good of the peace, he had to protect Relena, even if that meant severing all ties he had once held with her, shunning the love that she had given to him, no matter how it tore him up inside. Looking down over the gathering Heero singled out one blond head from numerous others, and focused long and hard upon it, willing that young man to feel his presence and look up, he needed to be seen.

Quatre's head turned after what felt to Heero to have been an eternity, and he saw the horror in the former pilot's eyes. There was disbelief there also, and Heero hated himself for what he was about to do, even as his right arm raised showing clearly the gun he held tightly in his hand. With finger posed over the trigger Heero turned his attention back to his target, and was horrified to find no man standing in the balcony before him. Where was the assassin aiming to make a name for himself by taking Relena's life? There was no one hiding there in the shadows, thinking himself above the law, and able to accomplish what no other man had ever been able to.

Heero realised in utter horror and self loathing that his aim true, as it had been that day, and without hesitation—his mind screaming at him to stop—Heero fired a single bullet. The blazing metal caught Relena right through the heart, and with eyes filled with fear she cast a fleeting glance his way. That single look seared Heero's entire mind and body more that the fires of hell could ever hope to. In that look was the single question…why?

Why after all the love and patience she had show him did he feel the need to take her life? Why with all the good that she could do for this world, did he feel she did not deserve to live? Why with the peace they had finally attained, that he himself had wanted, did he need to jeopardise all that? Just simply why?

There were no words to describe the agony he felt as he watched her blood pool away from her body. Slipping off the edge of the stage like tiny crimson waterfalls. Yet her eyes remained ever focused upon him, and Heero cringed at what he saw within them. It was not the love she had held for him that he watched drain away, just the beautiful and vibrant life that had touched so many hearts. She held fast to her love, to something Heero would never be worthy of, that would stab him like a thousand knives each and every time he thought of it.

He had taken her life, and for what?

That was a question he could never answer…nor face.

John tore his vision from the screen when he head a hitch form in Heero's struggling breaths, and worried now, he stepped around the monitoring stations intend on waking the boy to discover what was wrong. But he stopped himself when the dim light caught Heero's face, revealing a silvery track of tears running down the side of his face. John hadn't know the boy for all that long, but he would have never taken him for one to show his emotions through tears, and besides that from all he had seen Heero wasn't one to show emotion at all. He wondered what was effecting the boy so much…was it still Trowa's rejection?

Heero's lips parted as a hoarse whisper escaped him, it was a single name, barely heard in the silence of the room. But that one name held more pain and anguish within it than John had ever thought to hear. “…Relena…” Heero's body continued to jerk, trapped within the throws of his nightmare, while John stood unable to move, and his mind tired to comprehend what he had heard. He had been confused when Heero had told his interrogators that he hadn't missed when he shot Relena. What could he have meant by that? What did that pain in his voice mean now? John knew of only one way to find out, and that was to wake the boy and ask him.

Coming to the boy's side John gently called out his name, hoping that alone would be enough to wake him from his troubled sleep. But the boy continued to struggle, unaware of the concerned old man standing over him. It was with some reluctance that John finally reached out his hand, and placed it upon Heero's shoulder shaking the boy ever so gently to get his attention. With a start Heero's eyes slowly opened, but for a time he was not seeing what was around him. He blinked unfocused eyes slowly coming to rest on John's face, and the old doctor saw, both surprise and a muted gratitude deep within his eyes.

“Are you alright now?” John asked not removing his hand from the boy's shoulder, “You were having a bad dream…” he felt silly to be saying it, but he couldn't think of what else to say. And he didn't want to risk having the potential for a conversation disappear.

Heero spent several moments just breathing shallowly and calmly, as though he were attempting to remove the memory of what he had seen in his dream. His eyes continued to hold a surprised light to them, something John could not understand. It was almost like Heero was surprised he had awoke from his dream…

“Heero?” John's voice slowly drew the boy's cobalt eyes to his face, “Can I ask you a question?” Heero's mute nod was the only response John received, “Why did you shoot her?”

Silence was John's only answer as he stood there watching Heero's expression turn to a mask of pain, very much a visual expression of the tone in his voice earlier. His eyes fell closed and for several long seconds he didn't appear to breathe, it was like everything had suddenly stopped. John founded himself tempted to check the clock hanging on the wall, just to be sure that time was indeed still moving. Finally the boy's eyes opened once more and he looked directly at John, with such a piercing look, it seemed as though his eyes went right through.

“…I…didn't…” he rasped in a painfully dry voice.

John blinked in surprise, wondering how that could possibly be true. He didn't like to think that Heero would lie to him, but then he didn't really have much to base any sort of opinion on. He just hadn't known Heero long enough for that, but then he had been taught to always expect the best from people and not the worst. So John quickly went back to the desk, and grabbed his water bottle, “What do you mean?” he asked as he raised the boy's head so he could wet his throat with a little water.

Heero blinked several times, staring at John's face, was he actually being given the chance to speak? To tell his side of the story? It was almost too much to hope for, and Heero wasn't entirely sure that he wanted to take the chance, what difference would it make? Could John do anything to effect change? Heero had not been expecting to be given this opportunity he hadn't even been expecting to wake again. He had allowed himself to fall into a place only Relena had ever managed to pull him out from, so why had he fallen into that dream? And then allowed himself to wake when John had called out his name?

He didn't possess any of the answers to his questions, but looking at John now, Heero saw the outlet to what he was feeling; a chance to end the burden he had carried alone for too long. John was a man he could trust, Heero had known that from the moment he had first met him. There was just something about the old man, that relaxed Heero's warrior instincts allowing him to feel truly at ease, something he had only been able to feel while around the pilots and Relena. He took a moment to gather himself before he tired to speak, there was just so much to say, and though he had been envisioning this moment for a long time, he still found himself caught unprepared.

“Had to…make them believe…” he began finally looking to John's face briefly before glancing at the water in his hand. John picked up on the subtle request immediately, and Heero allowed the cool refreshing water to trickle down the back of his throat, putting out the fire that raged there.

“What do you mean Heero?” John's face looked more than a little perplexed.

“I…would never…shoot her…” it frustrated Heero that he couldn't speak without nearly gasping for breath, but he continued despite the pain and seemingly daunting task of making the old doctor understand. “Inner Circle…they're a group…who…” Heero's words were ripped from him with a dry painful cough.

“Want to destroy the peace?” John supplied clearly hoping to help.

“Something…like that…” the former pilot spoke when at last he could breath again.

John's eye brows raised at that, “Why have I never heard of them before?”

“Not like…most…groups, they…sacrifices…speed for secrecy…” they had been able to slip under the radar as little more than a fleeting rumour, all the while gaining strength and power.

The old doctor seemed to be really mulling over this, “So you wanted to bring them down…” it was neither a question nor statement of fact, just John's musings gaining voice.

Heero nodded his head to what John had said, “But couldn't so long as…I was a…member of…”

“Relena's security,” John finished with his eyes going wide. “Are you telling me that this was all an elaborate plan?”

“Wouldn't shoot her…” Heero reiterated .

“So how then?”

“She's always been a target…” he was pleased to find that the longer he spoke the easier it became for him to sustain his breath while speaking. “I just shot…the man shooting her…”

“No body?” Before he'd let Heero answer he raised the bottle again so Heero could rewet his throat.

“Didn't kill him…”

John's face looked more than a little incredulous, “How could you have pulled this off? There were so many factors that you wouldn't have had any control over.” He pulled a hand through his grey hair, “What about forensics?”

“All information…was lost in a…series of viruses…” Heero told him simply, from where he had been standing in relation to the assassin the trajectory of the bullets were very close. And with all the information gathered at the scene lost there was really nothing to do other than speculate. It helped a great deal that he had been identified as the shooter, and the world believed him to be guilty. With an eye witness there to put him at the scene pulling the trigger, there was little initiative to delve so deeply into the sciences.

“Why Heero? If you weren't the one to shoot her why did you insist on making them all believe you had? The world yes…but why your friends?”

“It had to be real…actors can make…mistakes” Heero sighed letting his head fall tiredly to the side.

John felt almost like staggering at the weight of what Heero had just told him, he couldn't comprehend living under such a terrible burden. And for what? To protect the peace while the only friends you had believed you a traitor. “Heero…” John wanted so desperately to say something to comfort the boy, but what could he possibly offer of use?

“It's alright…I chose to do this…”

Nothing was said after that for a long time, as John tried to bring his mind to bear all that he now knew, while Heero seemed to recover from the telling, and the relief it offered to have someone else know. It wasn't right, none of this was right! How had things got so desperately out of hand? Heero deserved to be able to explain himself, to show his one time allies that he was still worthy of their trust, that he had not betrayed them as they all believed. A small part of John's brain attempted to discredit what he had just been told, finding it all to much to believe. But what possible purpose could he have to make up such a lie? From all John had seen there was nothing, the boy had resigned himself to the fate his actions had set out for him, and blamed no one but himself for what came of it.

“Heero, they need to be told about this,” he began eying the tired boy.

The Japanese boy merely shook his head, “They won't listen…and I can't blame…them for that…” his voice was beginning to lose what little energy that it had, and his eyes tiredly fell closed.

“There has to be something I can do Heero. You must have had a plan to be able to come back,” without really thinking John brushed his hand across Heero's forehead, the boy's fever still unchanged.

“I did…” he breathed without opening his eyes, “But I misjudged…their hatred…” Heero's words sounded slurred as his mind once more fell into the world of sleep. John only hoped that the world would be more peaceful for the boy.

He remained standing there long after Heero had fallen asleep, just watching the boy, and trying to figure out what to do. Heero was right, from all that John had seen, no one was in any mood to listen to what he had to say. So how could he get them to listen? He briefly contemplated simply going straight to Sally, force her to hear him out, even threaten if it came to that. But he didn't think any of it would do any good, besides bring it to her in that manner would no be conducive of having her believe it. That didn't leave him very many options to think of. There wasn't a single person John could think of, based on his viewings of the archives, who would be willing to listen. But did that mean there was no one left?

John slowly made his way back over to the desk, placing the water bottle down on the first open space he past. He felt lost and completely overwhelmed, where to even begin. Not knowing where to turn John's mind began to wander despite his best efforts to keep it focused on the task at hand. But that task was merely to ask the same question over and over again, without ever coming close to an answer. So his mind turned back to the moment he had walked into the room, completely unaware of all he would discover, at that moment all he had been concerned with was the condition of his patient. More than pleased to see that Heero was alive and actually fast asleep.

Fast asleep…John found it hard to believe that Luc would have allowed it to happen. He had already made a clear pattern of torture, though some days it was lighter than others, why stop now? John turned his attention back to the computer screen, continuing to watch the day's events to see what he might discover. And indeed as he had expected Luc had not foregone his pastime, but instead only gave up when it was clear the unresponsive Heero didn't care what happened to him.

John's ever wandering and clearly troubled mind recalled a day when he had entered the room to find Heero blindfolded, jumping at ever sound. Considering all Luc was capable of, this seemed to John to be rather a weak attempt at torture. Sure with instincts, and senses as sharp as Heero's clearly were it was not a pleasant situation to be in, and at the time John had only been pleased not to walk in and find the boy bleeding. Yet now he wondered if there had been something he'd missed from that day. Had Luc managed to slip something past him.

It surprised John when Luc left the room leaving Heero unattended, and a sinking feeling began to form in the pit of his stomach. He would like to know what it was he said to Sally while he was gone, he knew Luc was using the IV as a cover to go and speak with the female doctor, but what else was discussed? John surprise turned to horror as he watched Luc add something to the IV, at first he wanted to believe it couldn't be as bad as his intuition was telling him. But as he watched Heero's reaction to the added substance John knew without doubt that Luc had added Tylenol. It explained why Heero had seemed a little more out of it that usual when he had come in that evening…but why had he not died?

Unexpectedly Wufei entered the room, and John was forced to turn up the volume so that he could make out what the Chinese man said. At first his heart fell at the young man's harsh words, but as he continued to watch, noting the numerous looks he continued to cast Heero's way, John began to doubt his first assessment. The Chinese man made his way behind the monitoring station and his agile fingers flew over the key, and the screen went black. John jumped back in surprise having not expected that, it only lasted for a moment, and when the picture returned ten minutes had passed. Nothing in the room seemed immediately different, Wufei was again behind the desk, and Heero strapped to the table. Though now his writhing had ceased and he appeared to be asleep.

Did Wufei save him? John's mind reeled at the implications. This might had been what he was searching for all along, someone who might be willing to listen to reason, to come in and give Heero the chance to set everything right again. But how to get in touch with him…it could be as difficult as trying to get in touch with Relena. John heard again in his mind the way Heero had spoken her name, with so much regret and longing. Perhaps she, to, might be willing to let Heero explain himself.

Sighing John pulled both hands through his hair, feeling still at a complete loss. He had something to work with yes, but there was only so far he could go. He was only a doctor, and not entitled to the same security access as Sally was. Yet at the same time he couldn't afford to just simply give up, Heero's life and future depended on him being able to speak with them. John rubbed at his eyes in an attempt to clear his thinking, but found it did little to help. An idea suddenly entered into John's mind, and he found his hands reaching for a phone before he had even fully thought it out. Just as the phone began to ring John glanced at his watch to see what time it was, not wanting to be calling too early in the morning.

“Hello,” a young feminine voice greeted him after three rings.

“Good morning,” John returned amazed at the upbeat tone of his voice, “I was wondering if you might be able to give me a cell phone number that I seem to have misplaced.”

“Who is the number for? And your reason for needing it?” the young lady asked.

“The number is for Chang Wufei,” John told her slowly, his mind racing for an answer to her second question, “And I happen to be his doctor, I have some information he wanted passed on the moment I received it.” He might have had just as easy a time of it if he had checked a phone book listings, but there was no assurances that Wufei would be registered, and the Agency's records were sure to have it.

“Alright sir, and your name please?” she asked clearly wanting to make sure he was someone who could actually ask for this number.

“Dr John den Biesen, authorisation number 889 713 493,” he told her easily.

“Alright sir, the number is 793 8412.”

“Thank you very much,” he lowered the receiver to its cradle, overjoyed that it had worked. And feeling as though he might actually be able help Heero now with what he had. He sat there surrounded by the silence of the room, wondering if he dared try calling Wufei at this early hour. He supposed there was no time like the present, but what would he say to him? Would he even listen? The matter simply came down to the fact that there would be no way to find out if he just sat there staring at the phone. So he took up the receiver once more, and dialled the number that had been given to him.

He waited hardly breathing as the phone rang, trying desperately to think of what he was going to say, too prepare himself for what might come. The rings were cut off long before John had clearly planned out in his mind how he wanted to try and turn this conversation. “Chang here,” a masculine voice spoke curtly into the phone.

John hesitated for a moment, mouth dry, “Good morning,” he finally managed, pleased that his voice sounded calm and self assured. “Sorry for calling you so early, my name is John den Biesen. I know we've never met but I'm calling on behalf of a mutual acquaintance of ours.”

Wufei was silent for several moments, and John found himself holding his breath, afraid he had misjudged, and the man would hang up on him. “I'm listening…” the smooth slightly superior tone responded finally.

“You saved his life that day you switched the IV,” John began his voice clearly portraying how grateful he was for that action. “There's something that he needs to tell you, it's important, and I think you out of everyone he once knew might be able to listen with the most objective mind…” John wasn't sure why he wasn't using Heero's name, it almost felt like that would shatter the moment, destroy his tenuous hold over the situation.

Wufei held his tiny cell to his right ear, onyx eyes watching Relena from across the breakfast table all the while, he did not recognise the voice on the other end, but that was not uncommon. “…I'm calling on behalf of a mutual acquaintance of ours.” Wufei's eyes subtly widened at that, and it didn't take much for him to know who it was this John was speaking of. He may not have recognised the voice, but the name was something that seemed familiar to Wufei. He seemed to recall Sally mentioning the name at one point or another, the man was a doctor, and Wufei doubted John would be calling for any other occasion that Heero.

mutual acquaintance… Wufei mused silently eyes remaining calm as he watched Relena, he did not want to alarm her. And at the same time he himself didn't know how to react. What did this man have to say, it had to be important otherwise he would have been calling so early in the morning. But what could this doctor possibly know that they didn't? There was only one way to find out…

“I'm listening…” he responded slowly, standing from his chair feeling like he couldn't remain still.

Wufei though he heard the man on the other line breath a soft sigh of relief. “You saved his life that day you switched the IV,” John's voice was nearly over powered with gratitude, and Wufei wondered how this man could be so attached. He didn't know Heero, how could he? He had only been watching over the former pilot for a few days. Would Heero even really trust this man enough to speak to him, knowing Heero as well as he did Wufei found it hard to believe.

“There's something that he needs to tell you,” John continued his voice cutting through Wufei's thoughts. “It's important, and I think you out of everyone he once knew might be able to listen with the most objective mind…”

The Chinese man blinked, was that what he was…objective? Not influenced, confused, misguided? He liked the sound of it, but at the same time it concerned him, what was it that Heero had to say? That John needed an objective mind to hear? If it was entirely good, wouldn't any of them have worked? He had thought all the pilots wanted the truth, so why then come just to him? Unless what Heero had to say was less good than it was bad, and John hoped an impartial mind might be able to see the good as an outweighing factor. Wufei wasn't so sure he wanted to know now, for years he had held out the shallow hope that there might be an answer to all his questions, something favourable.

Was this now the moment where might discover otherwise? Where he'd be forced to face the truth not matter what it was? Wufei felt put upon the defensive by that, despite long years of wanting to ask Heero for the truth, he didn't think he truly wanted to face the pain that would come if the truth was anything other than what he hoped for. Wufei gave a sudden start realising where his train of thought had taken him, when had he become so weak, as to try and hide from the truth no matter what it was. Internally ashamed, he turned his back to Relena casting his gaze out a window, and spoke through the silence. “What are you talking about?” his voice was harsher than he had intended.

“I'm talking about the assassination attempt on Relena's life…” the tone of his voice told Wufei clearly that that should have said it all.

“What has he to say about that?” Wufei questioned, his hopes rising a fraction, as he attempted to keep his voice cool and indifferent. Was there really something all of them had missed that day? But if that was indeed the case why had Heero not corrected them, explained the situation when he had the chance? Wufei was not about to let his hopes rise any further, not when there was no guarantee that he would be rewarded.

“I think it better that he tell you…” John's voice was obviously hesitant, and it didn't take much thought for Wufei to know why. The man wanted Wufei to come, but at the same time he didn't want to ruin what chance there might have been for Wufei to listen with an open mind. Therefore John had to be very careful not to influence Wufei's mind set.

Wufei, glanced through the corner of one eye, to where Relena was avidly watching him, but she was patient clearly willing to wait for his conversation to finish before she asked about it. He looked deep into her eyes without appearing too, trying to see if she had any inclination towards what he was talking about. He couldn't see how, he hadn't said anything to really indicate the topic, and the conversation itself had been such a surprise to him, that he doubted it could even enter the widest scope of her dreams. Already he knew she would be asking him about the conversation, and he also knew that there was no way he'd be able to avoid telling her what it had been about. She would figure it out, no doubt.

“When?” he asked finally.

“Tonight,” was the quick response, “I'd rather for the moment that certain people not know I'm arranging this…”

“Alright, I'll be there,” Wufei told John running his free hand over his smoothed back hair as he did. Feeling that was as good a way to end the conversation as any Wufei shut off his cell, and slipped it back onto his belt. For several blissful moments the former pilot was able to stand in silence, eyes looking out the window, yet not seeing any of the spring beauty. His thoughts were turned more darkly inwards, attempted to properly prepare himself for what he was going to face.

“Wufei…” the moment couldn't possibly last, he should have been surprised and grateful for how long he did have. “Who was that?” Relena's voice maintained that amazing calm that she had been portraying for the past few days. She had only slipped once, allowing Wufei to see truly what her game was.

The Chinese man was not quick to answer as he ran through his options. He might be able to evade for a while, but in the end he knew that there was really no point in keeping it from her. She more so than anyone had a right to know, the question was, was the chance he was about to take worth the risk for her? Wufei couldn't say for sure, but he thought that if the information turned out to be bad, he'd be able to come to terms with it, in time. However he wasn't as sure that Relena would be able to do the same thing. Her hope had been so well hidden over the years, but Wufei suddenly remembered the conversation he had had with Trowa, on the way back to earth after rescuing Relena. Could he let her take the risk of further heartache?

“Wufei..?” a hint of impatience entered into Relena's voice, as she continued to wait seated still at the breakfast table.

He turned to face her, his expression a carefully composed mask. “No one important…” he settled on finally as an answer. Wufei was not about to send Relena walking into that room without first knowing what was to come. He did not want to be the cause of further pain for her.

Relena rose gracefully from her seat, her pretty lips curving into a slight smile, one that said so much. It was sad, but at the same time sardonic, it told him, she knew far more than he wanted her too, and at the same time that he himself knew nothing. “You don't honestly expect me to believe that do you?”

“Would you accept that not knowing is for you own good?” he didn't think that would win him any favours and he was right. Her expression never faltered, something Wufei knew would be intimidating, had he not been the man he was.

“You already knew it wouldn't…so who was on the phone?” She asked coming a few steps closer, “And what does it have to do with Heero?” the last Wufei thought he almost heard a hint of desperation.

Sighing, Wufei dropped his head, watching Relena still from the tops of his eyes. There was no help for it, Relena was not about to sit this one out, even if it meant protecting her from further pain. Honestly Wufei couldn't blame her for that, either, she was a strong woman, and she had stood in the face of many staggering disappointments and dangers, she would be able to withstand this. Wufei only hoped her smile would still be there at the end. “We're going in tonight.”

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He turned his attention back to the boy, Heero's eyes were opened but not much as he tiredly watched John. “Do you think you can stay awake for a while?” he asked, having up till now not considered the fact that Heero might not be in a position to speak to Wufei.

The boy looked at him, his face scrunching slightly as he forced his eyes to focus, “Why?”

“Because someone's coming in to speak with you…” John explained gently, watching closely for any reaction that Heero might give.

“Wha…” Heero's voice cracked as his eyes widened clearly showing his surprise. John thought he saw a brief flash of hope, but it had been crushed behind iron walls too quickly for him to be able to say for sure. “Who?” he brought himself to ask finally.

“Chang Wufei,” John told him, “He saved your life, when Luc had put Tylenol in your IV.”

Heero's face was clearly puzzled by this at first, but John could tell he was thinking back trying to remember what John had made reference to. Finally a light entered his eyes, and Heero's head gave a slight nod, “That's what…it…was…”

“Yes that was it,” John confirmed, “I want him to come in so you can tell him the same thing you told me.”

Silence was his response as Heero appeared to consider what he had been told, his eyes opened after several minutes, and John did not like what he saw there. “It won't matter…” his voice rasped with a barely perceivable wobble to it, “I shot…him…” his eyes feel closed at that.

“What?” the words had been hard to make out, and John could not be sure he heard them right. But the look in the boy's eyes, and that near broken tone of his voice, only confirmed that he couldn't have miss heard. He looked deeply into Heero's eyes, remembering back two years ago, when the media had been inundated with news about Change Wufei having been mysteriously shot, and no perpetrator had been found. “That was you back then?”

Heero gave his head the slightest nod of affirmation.

“Why?”

The boy's eyes closed, and John thought he was thinking back on the instance, “I didn't want to…wasn't supposed to…be seen…” Heero breathed after several minutes, eyes opening only a crack, and it looked to John as though he were staring at the knife. It felt to John like what little hope had been breathed back into Heero's body—however briefly—was now gone.

“Don't forget Heero, Wufei saved your life,” he reached out a hand to the boy's shoulder, feeling he needed some form of contact with Heero to help get his point across. “He wouldn't have done that if he utterly hated you.” Heero gave no outward reaction as to whether or not John's words had had any effect on him, he just lay there, hardly seeming to breathe. All John could do was hope Wufei would get there soon.

“I've…never hated…any of them…” the boy whispered.

Morganeth Taren'drel