Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Orphan Stage ❯ Stage Blackout ( Chapter 14 )

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Gundam Wing Characters, blah blah blah

Pairings: 1x2, 3+4, 5+H

Warning: Yaoi

Summary: Duo Maxwell is put into a protection program after his father gets out of jail and goes missing. Duo finds himself in a situation where he can finally find his brother that was adopted ten years ago.

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Stage Blackout

"Heero?" We were lying on his bed, him leaning over me. I could feel his hand running up and down my arm, causing me to flush from the sensation of his skin on mine.

He's asked me why I liked him. It was such of a hard question to answer. I think it was more of a feeling, not certain things about him. But… he seemed to be searching for something, worried about my answer…

What was I to say? There was way too much. I guess, the first reason I was drawn to him was because of his looks. But, isn't that usually what brings two people together at first? Their appearance, behavior… the first impression. And then you start to get to know one another… find out if the relationship will work or not.

Heero is so strong… I think that was the second thing that drew me to him. His strength… even if he doesn't realize it, it's there. I'd seen it when he stood by me, seen it when he confessed his past. His eyes will tell you… the cold mask he wears… his strength against his problems. He sees it as a weakness and I should be angry at him for that. Yet, he admits to himself… he can honestly tell me he is weak… isn't that strength? To not deny apart of you? To be able to analyze yourself and pick out your flaws. Trying to change them… to become a better person. I only wish I could tell him that he is strong in that sense… but I would be too afraid of his denial. He wouldn't except that as strength… he is looking above that.

I am really much more like him than he realizes. We both are two people whom feel weakened by our childhoods. People who lacked love, and family.

I had always looked for something better in my life… something to make me feel needed. I can not except that my life has no purpose other than to live and die. I'm so close to finding it… so close to figuring out my fate. All the clues are in front of me, they just need to be put in place. And it all starts with Heero… the only person I can somewhat relate to.

We are similar, yes, but I would never admit that my life has been worse than his… how horrible to grow up in a cold home like he had. No love, being ignored. Just thinking about it makes me want to rip something apart. This house would be a good start.

I'd do anything for Heero… That was a pretty scary thought that was spinning around in my head. It's how I felt, honestly… I would kill anyone who so much as touched him in a bad way… and it frightened me. That I would lose so much control if anything were to happen to him.

Caring… or loving… I can not fully understand all of the emotions that float around inside of me. It hurts sometimes… to think of him, living down in his cold cell called a bedroom…

I think I just realized why I am here now. Down with him in the dark computer filled room. Why I always wanted to come here.

There are places you like to be… only because they hold memories. Like you go back to an old run down theatre just because you had gone there ten years ago. Sitting in the once new seats, reliving the events that happened with blissful thoughts. Heero… I want him to have a memory… something to make him like his room. And when I'm not there with him… he can remember that I was… I was here, making his room a little more livable.

There is already so much down here… and maybe he was able to feel me even when I was gone those two weeks.

Our first kiss… I wonder if he remembers, or if he had thought about that when he missed me most. I wont be able to stay by his side forever… wont be able to comfort him in his creepy room every day… but at least he will remember that I was here.

Heero's hand came up to brush the hair away from my forehead. The soft gesture pulled me from my upsetting thoughts. Made me realize that he was still waiting for my answer. But what could I tell him? It hurts when your not around? My knees feel weak every time you touch me? I don't think that is the kind of answer he was looking for.

His dark blue eyes turned to the side in disappointment… most likely because I was having such a hard time with this and I had to think for so long.

After laying down, staring at him for a long while, I finally realized that it didn't matter what I said… he was only looking for the truth… he was only trying to reassure himself that I did in fact care for him. We never said so in words, only in gestures. I think he needed to hear it… the words that I couldn't quite say yet.

My hand snaked up to the back of his skull, pulling him down closer to me. Mouth twisted upwards as I leaned forward, brushing my lips softly against his. It was a quick kiss, just to get his attention on me again and not the wall that seemed to be so interesting to him a minute ago.

"To me…" I whispered lightly against his lips. "your perfect." I felt him exhale the deep breath he must have been holding and his lips pressed quickly to mine. Moaning softly as my mouth opened to let his tongue roam.

Hands came up to cup my face as he pulled away and I could see the almost sad look spread on his face. "Far from it." He said softly, rubbing his thumb across the side of my face, running down to trace my bottom lip.

I just snorted before saying, "What? Not happy with my answer?" My lip stuck out and I put on my best pouting face for him. "Well then, what about your answer… why do you like me?"

He sat up quickly, and I could just barely see the smirk on his face before he stood, back facing me. I was still laying flat on the bed as he mumbled. "Your full of surprises."

"What?" I gawked at his retreating back for a moment before asking, "What's that suppose to mean?"

He just shrugged, ignoring me while stretching his arms above his head. If he wasn't still wearing that damn white shirt I might have gotten to see his nice muscular back rippling as he rolled his shoulders. Sigh, oh well, I can always make him do that later…heh.

"Ne, Heero… I'm hungry." I whined as I felt the slight ping of hunger from my stomach. I hadn't eaten much today. "I was a nervous wreck all friking day… thinking about the prom. I don't even think I touched my breakfast. Thinkin' about eating made me want to puke!" I admitted, sitting up and hobbling over to Heero.

"Hmm…" His eyebrows crinkled together slightly and he stood before me, lost in thought for a moment. "I think… there might be something we can make." His arms snaked around my waist, and once more he picked me up off the ground.

I yelped in surprise, I had been in the middle of re-buttoning my black shirt that had been hanging off my shoulders. "Wah! Heero, you don't need to carry me all the time!" I complained as we stepped into the dark stairwell. My arms instinctively tightened around his neck and my eyes clamped shut. I could feel my chest grow tighter as my breath picked up its pace.

Heero carried me up the stairs, not once acting as if I was heavy. "We're up." He said, closing the wooden door with his foot. How he managed to open the door with his hands occupied was beyond me.

Sighing, my arms loosened there death grip. It took me awhile to calm down, the fear of Heero dropping me and my claustrophobia probably wasn't good for my health. Being scared sucks, and no matter what I did, I couldn't seem to get rid of the stupid fear. The darkness, and the walls that are too close together… still remind me of that closet. The one I was locked into by Hall.

Disappointment washed over me as I realized I hadn't changed… I was still afraid as ever. Somewhere in my head I got the idea that maybe I would be cured if Hall was dead. But, I guess it is much deeper than that.

"You can put me down now, ya know." I wiggled slightly in his arms in attempt for him to lose his grip on me, but he just chuckled and squeezed me tighter.

"I know." He said, completely ignoring me and continuing to carry me through the dark hallways. It was late, probably close to midnight. And it was dark! I didn't even think that the house could possibly be any darker than it was during the day. Ugh, this place was way too creepy. No wonder Heero doesn't seem to be afraid of anything… I guess he is immune to the whole 'haunted house creepiness' fear.

My hand reached out as we approached the dinning room, turning the knob for Heero. He just grunted in thanks and we made our way to the kitchen. It was pitch black in there, no windows aligned the walls, kinda like Heero's room. Though, I think the kitchen was bigger.

Heero set me down for a moment as he looked for a light switch.

"Where the hell did that damn switch go?" He mumbled. I could hear his hand sliding along the wall in a desperate search.

As the seconds grew longer, I suddenly felt the hairs on the back of my neck start to stand up. My wide eyes searched the blackness for something, anything to make me feel a little easier. But I could barely even make out Heero as he moved to find the magical switch that would make me feel so much better by giving us vision!

A clicking sound went off and I jumped as white light spilled around the room. My hand came over to instinctively cover my heart and I breathed out a shaky breath. Mouth open instinctively to thank Heero, but as I turned to him I noticed his wide eyes and paused hand on the wall. There wasn't a switch even close to where he was standing.

"Master Yuy! Is everything alright?" Looking towards the other end of the kitchen, I was startled to see a short maid making her way over to us. My eyebrow raised and I looked over to Heero in confusion. Why was she talking to him?

"Shh… be quiet." Heero growled towards the woman. The maids hand came to cover her mouth and she looked over in our direction in apology. "Everything's fine… I'm just getting something to eat." Heero said, while turning his back on the woman.

She took the hint and started to back towards the door she had come from. "Aa… sorry I disturbed you, I just heard some noises is all. My room's right next to the kitchen is all. Just a little worried is all." I bit the inside of my cheek to stop the smile that wanted to come over my lips as I listened to her weird accent and funny speech.

She was a short woman, probably in her late thirties. As she turned around I could see her walking funny, like she had a bad limp. As her back disappeared out the door on the other side of the room, I looked up to Heero whom had his eyes closed and a hand massaging his temple.

"That was close." He sighed, walking over to the big refrigerator to browse its contents.

"Eh? What do you mean?"

He pulled out something that looked like sandwich meat and walked over to the food cupboard. "I'm not suppose to… well I'm not allowed to do anything really. Especially steal food at night."

I snorted at that. "Yeah well, it's your money buying the food." The maid lady came back to my mind and I was all of a sudden really interested in her. "Who was she? I thought no one was suppose to talk to you."

From what he set down on the counter, I figured he was making some turkey… or chicken sandwiches.

"She's not suppose to talk to me… but a while back I asked her for some favors…" He got out a knife from one of the big drawers to spread some weird substance on the bread.

"Favors?" My curiosity was killing me and Heero just 'had' to speak so slowly!

"Aa… she used to steal money for me."

"EH?!" My eyes widened slightly as I sat down on one of the kitchen stools set around the counters. It creaked loudly under my weight. I froze up for a second as I realizing that every shift I made would make an annoying squeak. I changed stools quickly and was happy to note that this one only wobbled a little, having one of its legs a little short. The brown stools were really old looking, which made me realize that most of the stuff in here was old and worn. Obviously, Heero's relatives didn't care about the kitchen staff's equipment.

"Well… technically she wasn't really stealing since, like you said, its my money." He stated, sitting down beside me and handing me a sandwich. "How do you think I was able to afford all my computers?"

"Eh, I didn't think of that. So she stole money from your Aunt…. how?" I was surprised when I took a bite of the sandwich, expecting the white substance he used to be mayonnaise. "Eck! What is this?" I asked, opening up the sandwich and sniffing the weird stuff in order to determine what it was.

"Don't know, just thought I'd try it. Might be some turkey fat left over from last nights dinner." I could feel myself pale slightly and looked to my food, all of a sudden not so hungry.

As I stared at my sandwich for awhile, Heero continued telling me about this 'maid' lady. "Laundry… she would find money in there all the time… and a couple times she found credit cards. The stupid relatives never even knew they were being robbed. That shows how much money they were wasting." As he said this, he didn't look angry at all, not one bit mad that they were spending his money. I was kinda amazing really, to see him take it so easily. But… I wondered if that was only the face he would show me… maybe he was really hurt about it, but didn't want to show it. That was just like him… Ugh, how was I going to get him to open up more?

"Umm… that lady… she had a limp."

"Hmmm…" He grabbed a napkin from on the counter top and wiped his mouth before saying, "I think she has one leg shorter than the other, but I'm not certain. She's a good lady though, only one to ever talk to me for longer than a week." He didn't say anything about her after that, just continued eating his food.

We sat in relative silence for a little while longer… me picking at my food until Heero finally admitted that the mysterious white substance was actually ranch dressing. After knowing that it wasn't… chicken fat, I actually thought it was pretty good, especially since Heero made it!

He seemed to go quiet for a long time after that, a disturbing sort of quiet. I could tell something was bothering him, but was too afraid to ask what it was. His eyebrows were drawn together in deep thought, mouth twisted down into a frown. I think he forgot about me for awhile, too lost in his mind, because we just sat there on the stools in the too quiet kitchen long after the food was gone. And he hadn't even seemed bothered by my non-talkativeness, which he usually noticed right away.

"Heero?" His head snapped up and his eyes widened slightly at seeing the worried expression on my face.

"Aa… sorry. Was just thinking." He wouldn't say anything else, and I didn't want to push him any further for tonight, my mind was starting to shut down from exhaustion.

We crashed back downstairs at around twelve thirty, or so his little computer said! And I don't think that it would lie to me. My muscles were aching and I could feel my eyes drooping for about the hundredth time that night, I was beat!

"We go sleep now?" I mumbled as Heero set me down on his bed. He smiled softly while helping me take off my socks. Don't know when I lost the shoes, I was too tired to really care. If I were to look in a mirror I would bet my hair was half out of my messy braid and dark circles were starting form under my eyes.

Yawning, I pulled Heero down next to me, wrapping my arms around him tightly. "Duo… I need to go get changed." He complained while trying to extract himself from my grip, which wasn't too hard considering my arms were having trouble lifting even an inch off the bed.

"Mmmmm… hurry…" The words came out as a whisper as I sunk deeper into the mattress.

There was a shuffling sound from across the room, I would have liked to open my eyes but they seemed happy being closed. A minute later the bed shifted and I rolled slightly into Heero. His warm arms came to wrap around my waist and I snuggled my head up against him.

He could be so gentle sometimes and it was really funny thinking about how he used to act. Cold, emotionless… I remember when I played basketball with him, how he looked so fast and strong, made me feel like he could break my bones by just running into me.

For some reason… it seems like I never left. Everything was the same when I came back, Heero was the same… or was he?

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Cold, something was running down my leg and I shivered when my eyes finally opened. I stared up at the ceiling, trying to figure out what it was that had awoken me when I felt something run down my leg again. My head snapped down to find out what the strange thing was. Eyes widening as I saw Heero, poised over me, running his hand over my leg, right by the wound on my calf.

I felt a shudder run through me as he looked up to me, eyes staring straight into mine. My face flushed slightly when realizing that I was only in my boxers. How did that happen? Heero wasn't much better off, he was wearing dark gray sweat pants with no shirt to cover his muscled upper body. A smirk formed on his lips and he bent down, giving the healing flesh the same treatment he had my shoulder. A soft feather kiss before coming up to nuzzle my neck. My breath was in short rasps as his lips moved to cover mine.

"H-Heero?"

"Mmmm… Morning." His hand came up to pinch the side of my hip, making me jump with a sharp squeak. "Oh? Ticklish?" He asked, moving his hand back to my side.

"Umm." I really wanted to lie and say that I wasn't ticklish, but it was kinda obvious now wasn't it?

His hand pinched my side some more, causing my knees to fold up instinctively as I tried desperately to fend off his attacks. One strong hand grabbed my foot and I squealed loudly as he brushed his hand over it.

"S.. stop… ow… cant breath." He just laughed at my torture and I soon ended up falling out of bed in order to get free. "S'not funny!"

I lay on the ground, panting and out of breath. I could see Heero smirk in triumph while looking down at me from his perch on the bed.

It was so cold!

My arms wrapped around my shoulders in attempt to warm up. I didn't dare try and get back into the bed… he was still there, and I would rather be cold than tickled. I blew out a deep breath, finally calming down from my laughing fit. It hurt to laugh that much, and I was getting irritated that Heero was so amused by my suffering!

I watched as the soft expression fell from his face, only to be replaced by something akin to worry. His eyes turned down and to the side, I watched all this with a little bit of fear. Something was wrong with him, I could see it last night a little bit, when we were eating in the kitchen. How he had zoned out like he was doing now.

"Heero? Is… are you…" My voice trailed off as I saw his hand come up to rub his temples as if he had a headache.

"I…" Moving closer to him, I could see his eyes close as if trying hard to concentrate and get the words to come out. "I'm sorry."

His dark blue eyes opened up to look at me, filled with sadness and I could barely get my voice out to ask, "Sorry?"

"The… trial… is tomorrow… I wont be able to see you for… maybe a week." His eyes bore into mine and widened slightly. I wondered what was so shocking to him, but I soon realized that my expression must have had him surprised.

My eyes closed on their own accord and I let out the breath I had been holding, taking another couple of deep ones to calm myself. The sides of my eyes were prickling, and I couldn't figure out why I was so upset. Maybe it was because I had just come back… or maybe because I was scared… for him. What would happen to him if the judge gave his Aunt all the money? I was scared thinking about how he would feel… losing what was rightfully his.

My eyes slowly opened and I gave Heero a weak smile, it was all I could muster up at the time. His eyes were looking at me, pain filling them as the silence dragged on for a couple minutes more.

"Where… are you going?" I asked, never taking my eyes off of him.

"There's a Judge… that's used to cases like this one… it's a long way out of town."

It was kinda awkward, we were now switching roles once again. Him leaving me behind, like I had left him. But I knew he would be back… It must have been ten times worse for him, not knowing if I would come back years later… or at all.

"W-when…"

"Yesterday… my birthday was yesterday. I got the letter informing me of the trial date a week ago." He answered my question before I could even voice it and my chest tightened slightly as I realized what he had just said.

"WHAT?!" I stood up, quickly walking to stand over his sitting form on the bed. "Heero… why didn't you tell me…" My hands flew up into the air and I let out a frustrated sigh. "Yesterday! It was yesterday and you didn't even tell me!"

My actions must have been amusing to him, because I could hear a light chuckle coming from him as he stood up, arms coming to wrap around me. "I didn't think it was that important." He admitted, pulling me down to lay beside him on the bed.

I growled but wrapped my arms around his warm body in return, face turned so I could look him in the eye. "A week."

"Maybe more." He said, kissing me lightly on the cheek in apology.

We didn't say anything more, just stayed by each other for the remainder of the morning. I think I fell asleep again, only to be awaken by Heero softly petting my hair. I didn't want to get up, Heero was leaving tomorrow, and I felt like if I were to get up… it would only be closer to his departure time.

"Heero…" It was around noon by the time I finally found myself wanting to talk to him. "What did you do after I left… I mean… I didn't even say goodbye." It was really painful to think about that. I should never have had to leave without telling him I was going. I could only guess some of the feelings he went through.

"It wasn't your fault." He said, as if seeing right through my question. Knowing I wanted comfort and to not be at fault. "I only broke a computer or two."

I smirked, feeling a little happy that he was so mad over it… I know, cruel, but it showed he cared, right? Like I should even be doubting that. Damn… he broke a computer.

"Lets go do something." It was Sunday, and we were just sitting there wasting the day away. I wanted to do something to take my mind off the problems coming up. We needed to do something fun for a change. Maybe go out on a date! Oh! Fun! "Lets go to an amusement park!" I suggested, looking hopefully to Heero.

He just snorted and said, "There isn't an amusement park for hundreds of miles." He probably saw the disappointment on my face because he quickly added, "How about the circus, I think they're in town."

My face brightened and I jumped up excitedly. "I've never been to one! Ooo lets go!"

Heero lent me some clothes and left me in his room to change as he took a shower. I don't know how I noticed the folded piece of paper on his desk, or why I opened it up. But when I did, I was surprised to see that it was the note… the one I wrote to him the day I left. The one I hadn't had time to finish. My eyes scanned it briefly and I smiled thinking about that day, how sweet he had been… and I left him.

An idea came to my mind and I snatched a pen from one of his desk drawers. I would finish it now, even if it is too late. I stared at the last line and for some reason I couldn't remember what I was going to say at the time. I think I forgot when Kemp came in to get me.

Oh! I almost forgot… I wanted to tell you th

Hmmm… oh well, I'm sure it wasn't 'that' important. I grinned slightly as I finished the note.

Now… where to put it…

A suitcase caught my eye. Although it made me sad, knowing that he would be leaving, I couldn't help but smile as I put the note in-between some of his clothes. If I couldn't say the my feelings out loud, then I might as well write them down! Hopefully he would see it, heh, and wont he be shocked!

Heero~

Ano… I don't remember what I wanted to say to you then… but… I wanted to finish this anyway………….. (stalling… stalling)…..

I wanted to tell you that…

I love you

~Duo

(see now its finished.)

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