Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ Share my Thoughts ❯ Chapter 2

Share my Thoughts

By Misanagi

Rated: PG13

Archive: http://www.psinergy.com/dryerspace/gundaniumline/misanagi/misanagi

Warnings: Shonen ai, angst.

Pairings: 3x4, 1x2, 5xS

Summary: Quatre seems different and the other pilots would do anything to find out what happened to him.

Timeline: After the Endless Waltz.

Feedback: Yes please!

Notes: This is my first GW fanfic. I rewrote it and I'll be posting the chapters as soon as they are done. If you read this before (which I doubt) the plot is still the same, I just changed some style things.

Dedication: To Anne, for her patience. Thanks a lot for beta reading this twice. *gives her some chocolate to feed her addiction and some carrots to feed her bunnies*

"blah" = Talking

'blah' = Thought (well duh!)

================

Chapter II

Quatre watched the full moon from his window at the top floor of Winner Enterprises Inc. It was a beautiful night, the sky was clear, and he could easily see the bright stars shining from above. He was glad that he'd decided to stay on Earth after the wars. There were no views on the colonies that could match the beauty of the Earth.

He sighed, turned his gaze away form the spectacular view, and concentrated on the last folder on his desk.

'Just one more and I can go home.' He laughed bitterly when he thought that, no matter what, he would have another monumental pile of paperwork tomorrow that would need his approval and supervision. It had been a very long day. He normally preferred to work late than to wake up early. Everyone at WEI knew that he wouldn't arrive at the office before ten in the morning and that, unless it was a real emergency, he wouldn't take their calls.

A knock interrupted his thoughts and he raised his head from behind the folder to look at the person at the door.

"Mr. Winner?" said the old lady.

"Cecilia, what are you still doing here? It's very late."

"I wanted to finish some reports but I'm done now so I'm going to take off, if that's okay."

"Of course it's okay. It's late and you shouldn't stay this long. I'm going to pay you overtime but you should really go and rest."

Cecilia gave a small chuckle. "You should apply some of your wisdom to yourself, Mr. Winner. Good night."

* * *

Cecilia closed the door and went to her desk to gather her belongings before going home.

She looked at her watch; it was nine o'clock. It was not usual for her to stay this late in the office; she usually left at seven and was one of the last to leave, but Mr. Winner was always there. She pitied him somehow; he was so young and had already so much responsibility. It wasn't fair. Cecilia had a son only a couple of years younger than her boss and she just couldn't picture the hyperactive seventeen year old stuck in an office from ten to nine every day. Winner Enterprises had been her work place for a long time and she recognized the positive change that the business had taken since the young man had been in charge, but she could also see that it had cost him a lot.

Sometimes his friends came to the office to take him out to lunch or just to visit. Cecilia liked all of them, even if they were far from normal.

That weird kid with the long braid always managed to get Mr. Winner out of the office, no matter how busy he was. The Chinese one could be heard form her desk as he explained to Mr. Winner that if he wanted to keep his strength he needed some rest. The young man was the voice of reason and was often heard, but of course Mr. Winner could be as stubborn as a goat when he wanted to.

The Japanese one was a mystery to her. He never spoke; he just exited the elevator and walked straight to Mr. Winner's office. Two minutes later they both exited the office. The few times they both stayed in the office, Mr. Winner cancelled all his appointments. What happened behind those doors was something that she was still trying to figure out.

Last but not least, was the tall kid. Cecilia knew that he was much more than Mr. Winner's friend. She could see them interact; the soft touches and the way her boss's face lit up whenever he entered the office. She never asked but she knew that they weren't trying to hide their relationship; they were just shy in public, or so she thought.

Cecilia reached her car in the parking lot. She looked up at the tall structure and could see that there was only light in one window. She smiled softly at Mr. Winner's window before driving off; it had been a long day.

* * *

Thirty minutes later, Quatre closed the last folder and put it on the desk. He closed his eyes for a moment as he stretched in his leather chair. 'Finally,' he thought as he got up from his desk. He was really glad that he could read fast or that last report would have taken him at least another hour to finish. He put on his jacket and arranged the files neatly on the desk before leaving. The building was empty except for the night guards.

He walked to the elevator and pressed the P button that would take him to the parking lot. 'I'm hungry', he thought, and then realized that he hadn't had anything to eat since lunch. Finally, after the seven minute ride on the elevator, he exited the building and reached his bike.

There was virtually no traffic at that time of the day so Quatre could speed up on the empty streets as much as he liked. He missed his Gundam; while he liked racing in his bike, it was no match for the speed or power of a Gundam. He smiled as he thought of Sandrock. It might have been only a machine but, to Quatre, it was much more than that, and he would forever miss it.

Before he knew it, he was entering the driveway of his home. It was too late when he realized that he hadn't slowed down. He skillfully parked his bike and got out. He sighed before entering the house; he was in for a sermon on safe driving and speed limits. That's what he got for forgetting to slow down before entering the gate.

* * *

"Did you see how fast he was going?" Duo was still looking out the window.

"That was reckless," agreed Trowa.

"But impressive," said Wufei. "That was very skillful driving."

"Skillful or not, it's still dangerous," continued Duo.

Heero hid a smirk and wondered if he should tell them that Quatre always drove like that and that this time, he probably just forgot to slow down before entering the gates.

Quatre entered the living room. He kissed Trowa hello and then tossed his jacket on the sofa as he loosened his tie.

"Long day?" asked Trowa as he hugged his lover, who had accommodated himself on the sofa with Trowa as his cushion. Quatre only gave him a smile, before he was interrupted by his best friend.

"Of course it was a long day. Do you know what time is it?" asked Duo. He waited patiently for Quatre to reply but the blond just shrugged, being too comfortable to look at his watch. "It's ten o'clock, Quatre."

Quatre nodded but he kept his eyes fixed on Duo, as if he knew that this wasn't the end of it.

"Heero told me you left really early this morning," Duo continued, "so you have been working all day." He paused another moment and waited for Quatre to nod again. "You need to rest."

The blond opened his mouth to argue but Duo was having none of it. "You can't continue getting away with this; you are going to get sick. I bet you haven't eaten anything have you?" Quatre didn't answer but the silence betrayed him anyway. "Don't you think that your body needs food to survive and to work all those crazy hours?" Heero knew that Duo wanted to say more but he didn't. Instead, he changed his strategy, knowing that Quatre would argue against his reasons but would cooperate if someone else's needs were involved. "Come on, let's eat. We decided to wait for you and I'm really hungry."

"Dinner is ready," said Heero, walking to the kitchen. "But we need to talk after that," he finished, looking directly at Quatre.

* * *

Dinner passed smoothly and silently. All of them were used to the silence and it didn't bother them. When it was over, they walked to the living room and sat down. Quatre and Trowa took the sofa, Wufei the big armchair by the fireplace, and Heero the one in front of it. Duo simply made Heero move so that they both could fit on the same chair.

"So," said Quatre, after a few minutes of silence. "What did you want to talk about?"

The other ex-pilots looked at each other for a moment before Duo sighed and spoke. "Cat, we're worried about you."

"You mean you are worried about our talk yesterday, right?" said Quatre.

"Yes and no. You've been acting weird and yesterday was just something else that got us thinking," replied Duo.

"Quatre, you don't share much, especially about your childhood."

Quatre looked at Trowa in silence. "I can't talk about my childhood," he said after a while. "Don't worry about me, it's probably all this work. Maybe I do need to take a break."

"Oh no, you are not getting off that easily, Quatre. We talked with Rashid today and we know that something about your childhood is bothering you, and you need to talk about it; it's the only way we can help you," said Duo.

"Please, Quatre?" asked Trowa, softly.

The blond looked at all of them. They were his friends and he could see in their eyes that they wanted to help but what could he do?

He wasn't upset because they had talked to Rashid; he could understand their need for answers but they were not going to get any from the Maguanac leader. Quatre was the only one with the answers and he couldn't give them.

They had shared so much together and after knowing each other as well as they did, he was starting to feel guilty for deceiving them for so long. At first, he had thought that his small problems were nothing for them to worry about. He had always been there for them to help them anyway he could and they had finally begun to trust him. They trusted each other with their lives and then with their secrets.

Since he and Trowa had finally got together, he had tried to tell him so many times, but it was impossible. Maybe now was the chance, maybe now that his friends were so worried about him, he could open up to them.

"It's not that I don't want to," he said after a long time. "It's that I can't."

"What do you mean, you can't?" asked Wufei.

"We are not gonna tell anyone if that's what you are worried about," said Duo.

"It's not that. I know you would never betray my trust but it's impossible for me to talk about it."

"What exactly do you mean, Winner?"

"I… can't talk about it… but maybe Sally can help."

"What can she do?" inquired Wufei, trying unsuccessfully to hide the smile that appeared on his face at the mention of the Chinese woman.

"She is a doctor, isn't she? Maybe she can hypnotize me," pondered Quatre.

"What? Quatre, why do you need to be hypnotized?" asked Duo.

There was a moment of silence and then everyone looked at Quatre expectantly. He was trying to find a way to explain, but he wasn't being very successful.

"Mental block," said Heero, after a while.

Quatre smiled as he looked at him. He'd known that Heero would figure it out eventually.

"What do you mean, Heero?" asked Duo.

"Someone has placed a mental block on his memories to prevent him from talking about them."

"Care to explain, Yuy?"

"They did it to me sometimes; it's a mechanism to control people's minds. They didn't make him forget what happened; they just made it impossible for him to communicate it to another person. Even if he wanted to, he couldn't. That's why we need Sally, so that she can go into his memories."

They looked at Quatre for confirmation and he gave them the tiniest nod before smiling again.

"Do you mean that someone got into Quatre's head and made him keep quiet about his childhood?" asked Duo, his anger getting a little more visible with every word.

Heero only nodded and Quatre could see the fury hiding behind Duo's eyes. Duo was definitely not happy.

* * *

"I'm going to call Sally," said Wufei, after a while.

Trowa nodded and went to the kitchen. With a shake of his head, he told Heero to follow him.

"Explain," Trowa finally said when they were in the kitchen and could not be heard.

"J did that to me sometimes, it's a control mechanism. When he sent me into dangerous missions, and there was a high possibility of getting captured, he blocked the information in my mind so it would be impossible for me to reveal it if I was interrogated. That was a long time ago; he stopped doing it because he found out that it could easily be unblocked by hypnosis, so he started the torture resistance training."

"Can Sally help?"

"Yes, she is perfect for the job."

"Time of treatment?"

"Whatever it takes Sally to uncover all the blocked memories. It depends on how much information there is."

"Recovery?"

"About ninety percent."

"Side effects?"

"None that I can tell."

"Does it hurt?"

Heero thought about it for a moment. "It's complicated. I don't really know how this is affecting Quatre. I only had the blocks for short periods of time but he has probably had them for years."

"Heero, does it hurt?" asked Trowa with an even voice.

"Sometimes," he said finally. "When you remember whatever that is blocked and try to fight it."

Trowa only nodded and Heero could tell that he was deep in thought. Someone had done something really bad to Quatre and then they had prevented him from talking about it. He could tell that Trowa was just as mad as Duo and that he was probably making the funeral arrangements for whoever had dared to do this to Quatre.

"We don't know what happened," said Heero.

"It couldn't be anything good if they want to block it," replied Trowa, simply.

"Let's not jump to conclusions. We have to wait for Sally." Heero put a hand on his friend's shoulder. "He is going to be okay," he said to Trowa and to himself. He knew what it was like to have someone messing with your head and how much it hurt to fight those blocks.

Someone had messed with one of his friends, with his family; they had done something to Quatre that he didn't deserve. Heero could understand and forgive everything that they had done to him, but not to Quatre. If they messed with his family they messed with him and there would be no place on Earth or the colonies where they could hide from the angered Gundam pilots.

* * *

Wufei hung up the phone with a smile on his face. That woman could be quite annoying, but he had to admit that she was the strongest woman he knew, and the prettiest. He stopped when he realized the direction that his thoughts were taking. This was not the time to be daydreaming about her. Winner had a problem and they needed to help him.

He smiled. Sally would be there the next day and he would be able to see her again. She would take care of Winner and then everything would be fine.

And after Winner was cured of whatever was done to him, he was going to hunt down the people responsible and make them pay for it. He walked into the living room with an evil grin on his face, to tell the others the news.

TBC