Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ The Last of the Pacifists ❯ The Last Pacifist ( Chapter 1 )

Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing.

The Last of the Pacifists…

By: Tenoko

"I want off of the list!" I snapped at the woman in front of me. Colonel Une closed the file in front of her,

"I'm afraid I can't do that."

~*FLASHBACK*~

We had all been called into Colonel Une's office that day for an announcement. Inside, Relena and Milliardo were already there, and a grim look shadowed his icy blue gaze. As for the others and myself, we lined up against the back wall, straight and erect. Colonel Une's gazed fell upon us,

"At ease." I quickly repositioned to the more comfortable stance, waiting for her to speak,

"I'm sure that you have all heard the rumor about the lost treaty between the Earth and colonies. And I am sure you've heard that it was a betrothal between the original Heero Yuy's son and the Peacecraft daughter," she paused, glancing over the documents in her hand, and then at her awaiting audience, "Recently found documents prove these rumors correct…" I heard Relena gasp, and the room seemed a little denser, as everything seemed to move in slow motion. Lady Une glanced in my direction again, before Relena spoke,

"So I'm going to have to marry him? Isn't there some way that you can stop it?" she paused, "I didn't think they had a son."

"That… is our current problem. They do have a son, and was a text tube baby. His father was assassinated before his birth, and his mother was killed in a shuttle accident when he was supposedly two years of age. But… shortly after the test tube process began, there was an explosion in the lab, surprisingly, the embryo survived, and was moved to another lab under the supervision of another scientist, but any further information is unknown."

"So…?"

"So he is alive, and we have to find him so that the treaty can be fulfilled."

"But-"

"The people of the Earth and colonies already know about the treaty and betrothal, and to make it worse, the media is all over it." Milliardo cut in, turning to his younger sister, "We've already received many threats about if you neglect to fulfill the agreement. It is for your safety that we are forcing you into this marriage."

"But what if you don't find him?"
"…That's not an option."

"Milliardo, this isn't fair! Why me?! Why not you, you're the older one!"
"They never had a daughter, if they had, I would have to marry her." Relena turned and looked at me; I looked away, unable to look at her, to see the pain in her eyes, the tears she silently shed, the pleading look on her face… My chest felt tight, a lump formed in my throat, and my stomach was tied in a knot…

"I'm so sorry Relena, but until we find a loophole, by law, you have to marry him." her brother whispered; Relena gave a strangled cry and fled from the office. My heart constricted in my chest. Why did I feel this way about her betrothal? Mentally, I cringed at the word 'betrothal'.

"Heero?" I looked up to see Milliardo watching me; "You've been reassigned to twenty-four hour duty over Relena. You will stay with her twenty-four/seven, guard her with your life, and I mean it!"

"But-"

"You will stay at Relena's until this is over and her fiancée is found, is that clear?"

"Understood." I replied with a nod,

"All of you are dismissed."

~*END FLASHBACK*~

Lady Une had asked me to stay a moment afterwards, and it was then that she had informed me that I was one of the possible matches to Relena's fiancée. I was infuriated, I knew that I wasn't him, but she didn't seem to understand,

"Colonel Une," I spoke slowly, hoping to help her grasp what I was saying, "I am an assassin, *not* a pacifist. I am not the real Heero Yuy. That is only my code name. I can't be the 'Pacifist Prince'."

"I know all of that, but… here's the thing." she replied, leaning forward and putting her chin in her hand, ", you are an orphan, no clue as to your true identity or past, you have the same physical features as their son should have, and… I think you would be glad if you were to marry Relena."

"And what made you think that?" I growled; She leaned back, smirking slightly, as if amused,

"Now Heero… you and I both know that Relena means a great deal to you. Though you may try and deny it to yourself and others, it's true, and if I dare say, you are in love with the girl. And if you can't acknowledge the fact that you love her, then you must know that she loves you."

"I-want-off-of -the-list." I seethed.

"No." she replied in a tone that stated it was no longer up for discussion; I was raging mad, but I knew that there was nothing that I could do about it.

"Fine," I snapped, "but when this is all over, you'll see that I was right, and you'll know that I'm not Heero Yuy's son." again, she smirked at me,

"We shall see, Heero Yuy. We shall see…"

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~(Relena's POV)

I had run blindly from the office, feeling completely and utterly betrayed and alone, And to make it worse the one that I truly loved hadn't even acknowledged me, he'd simply looked away, completely ignoring me and shattering what was left of my already broken heart. Somehow, I had made it to my apartment, collapsing onto the couch in another fit of uncontrollable sobs. I cried about the betrothal, about the love I'd never have from Heero, and about the heavy burden that came with my status, and I cried until I finally cried myself to sleep…

Groggily, I opened my eyes, an immediately stiffened. I was lying in a bed that I knew wasn't mine, and a strong arm was locked around my waist. I sat up quickly, adrenaline surging through my veins. This was my room. This wasn't my bed. Where was I? What was I doing here? What had happened? Suddenly, the figure lying in bed next to me sat up, and I stared at them as they stared back through a pair of Prussian blue eyes…

"Heero?" I questioned, closing my eyes and trying to calm my racing heart. His hand rested on my bare shoulder as the other snaked its way around my waist,

"It was only a dream. I'm here, so you can go back to sleep," he murmured against my jaw line. I opened my eyes in shock at the intimate contact. Again, I was on my back, in bed; I felt the space in the bed next to me. Empty. I sat up, looking around; I was home, and in my room. It had been a dream! But, it had been so real! Again, I looked around in confusion. How had I gotten in my room when I had fallen asleep on the couch? Timidly, I crawled out of bed, and tiptoed my way, silently down the hall, where muffled voices floated down the hallway. Noin, Dorothy, Hilde, and Milliardo sat around the living room, talking softly, just as Noin fell silent, seeing me.

"What are all of you doing here?" I asked confused,

"I wanted to see if you were alright." Milliardo stated, standing to his feet,

"And we thought that you might like some company." Noin added in.

"I appreciate the concern, but I'm really fine."

"Relena, I am truly sorry about this." Milliardo replied, reaching out to touch my hair, I jerked away from him,

"When were you ever sorry about anything?!" I hissed vehemently. He pulled his hand away, narrowing his eyes,

"Don't do this Relena. This isn't my fault. I'm doing all that I can to fix it, but I don't do miracles, I'm not God-"

"Did you just figure that out?" He glared at me,

"And I also came to tell you that Heero has been reassigned to be your bodyguard, twenty-four hours round the clock. He'll be staying with you until the 'Pacifist Prince' is found and the two of you are wed, or until we find a loophole, whichever comes first." I stared at him in both shock and fury,

"WHAT? What do you mean 'stay with me'? You expect him to live with me? Where is he supposed to sleep? This apartment has one bedroom!!" he put his hand up,

"I'm leaving the sleeping arrangements up to you, but I *don't* want to know what you work out." I glared furiously at him,

"Some times you make me hate you!" he blinked. Once. Twice. And when the reality of what I had said to him sunk in, something that seemed to be hurt flashed over his eyes, then he turned towards the door,

"Hate me all you want, but I'm making sure that you live to do so." and with that he was gone. I turned and looked at the others. Noin opened her mouth to say something, but Sally cut her off,

"Have a seat, Relena." she replied as Dorothy handed me a cup of tea. We all sat in the uncomfortable silence, the unspoken subject on each of our minds. I stared at the cup in my hands, watching the steam as it curled and twisted in the air before disappearing all together. I gazed in awe as an unnoticed tear fell into the steaming liquid, causing a ripple of liquid rings.

"Relena, talk to us. What's the matter?" Hilde prodded,

"He'll never love me." I whispered, choking on the word 'love'.

"Who? Heero? Relena, you mean the world to Heero. He cares a great deal-"

"He cares about the peace I bring," I recoiled, "but not me. He protects me to keep him from having to fight. He loves the peace… but not me." I looked at Noin,

"When's the date for the wedding?"

"Your eighteenth birthday."

"You know, if we can't find the real Heero Yuy… you could marry Heero." Hilde replied, I blinked, taken aback.

"What?"

"Well, what I mean is, his name is Heero Yuy, we don't know his past, he has brown hair and blue eyes just like the original Heero Yuy. I'm sure he could pass for the son of Heero Yuy, and if you marry him, end of problem."

"No."

"Why?"

"If love isn't apart of a marriage, then there should at least be a friendship. With Heero and I, it's a one way street, I love him, but the love isn't returned or even acknowledged, and he refuses to be my friend. The marriage wouldn't last, and he'd only end up hating me more than he does now."

"How can you say that?!"
"Because it's true!" I spat, "Do you know what he did when we were told about my betrothal? Do you? Nothing. Absolutely nothing! He didn't even look at me. He just stood there! No matter what you may think, I know that he doesn't care for me." None of them dared to try and argue with me, and again we sat in the deafening silence…

~*~*~*~*~*~*~(Heero's POV)

"Hey Heero! Wait up!" a voice called, and I turned to see Duo and the other coming towards me.

"Heero, man, you really surprised me back there by staying so calm."

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"Well, for one: Relena's getting married."

"Why would I care?"

"Two: she's not marrying you."

"Why would she? What did you think I'd do?"

"Oh I don't know, something along the lines of taking her away, confessing your feelings, eloping- *ouf!*" his statement was cut short by Wufei's elbow in his stomach,

"Shut your mouth, Baka! You aren't helping the situation." he snapped, and I looked at the still doubled over Duo,

"Why would I do any of those things?" He took in a deep breath, then looked at me,

"You love her. Plain and simple." he gasped,

"Wrong." I began, "It's not plain or simple, it's this: I am her bodyguard and she is my employer and job, that's it. I have no feelings to confess, no reason to elope. I protect her, and that's all."

"Well then we'd like your help to find the son of Heero Yuy." Trowa replied.

"No." I hissed, glaring unintentionally at the taller boy,

"We *need* your help."

"I'm a bodyguard, not a missing person's agent. Look for the Pacifist Prince on your own."

"Hey wait… How do we know *you're* not him?" Duo exclaimed, his face lighting up,

"Because I'm not."

"But you don't know that!"

"Yes, I do."

"How?"

"Because I am a Gundam Pilot, a trained assassin, murderer, and slaughterer. Now do you really believe that I could be the Pacifist Prince? I'm not, can't be, won't be, and don't want to be!"

"Heero," Quatre began, steeping forward, "Would you rather Relena marry someone she's know almost three years, or some she's never met before? Someone who could be cruel or unfaithful, or both! Which would you choose for her?"

"You are missing the key point. I'm not apart of this, and it doesn't matter what I think about the situation. I'm her bodyguard and my job is to protect her, and that's what I plan to do."

"Then do you want to protect her from heartbreak? Or maybe a cruel husband?"

"Protection from one's own emotions isn't in my job description. If he should dare to try and hurt her, I'll be there to stop him."

"…don't you care about her at all?"

"Such emotions are unnecessary, and I am incapable of having them." I stated, walking out of the building…

~~*~~

As I made my way to Relena's, my mind was whirling. Relena had always had some sort of hold on me, it was in her smile, the way she laughed, her gentle touch, it was in everything about her. It was in her fragility and strength, the way she moved, and it was in her tears as she cried. I knew I cared for her, I cared a great deal for her, but I refused to allow myself to love her, because that would be unutterably selfish of me. I didn't deserve for her to care about me, because of who I was, what I'd done, and what I was capable of…

~*~*~*~*~*~(Relena's POV)

The girls had left, and I was placing my untouched cup of tea in the sink, when a knock came at the door. Heero…

"Come in!" I called loudly over my shoulder, but refusing to move away from the sink.

"I did." a cold and empty voice replied from behind me. He was near, less than a few inches between us, because I could feel his body heat through the material of the blouse I was wearing. I swallowed, he was close, way too close, and if I didn't have enough sense I might have been tempted to turn around and cry my self to sleep against his shoulder, but I didn't dare even turn to face him, I couldn't bear to look at his eyes. Eyes that held no feeling in them, no warmth, no emotion, no nothing… they were completely empty.

"You at least need another dead bolt on the front door, the flimsy chain wouldn't keep anyone out." Jaw set, I turned to glare at him,

"Don't even go there, Heero Yuy. I'm not in the mood to be told about the importance of my safety from someone who couldn't care less about me." he glared, his eyes flashing, but he didn't say anything, instead turned and walked from the kitchen, as I turned back to the sink, blinking back the tears that know stung my eyes. I was sick of crying because of him, over him, and for him. I was sick of him trampling on my already broken heart. Did he enjoy it? Did he find it amusing to know that I was weaker than he, and gained satisfaction from making me cry? Well, I would no longer give him that satisfaction. I would show him that I was not the giddy schoolgirl he thought I was, and that I could stand on my own.

In the living room Heero was leaning against the wall, a small suitcase at his feet.

"You can keep your things in the closet down the hall. There's a futon couch in the bedroom you can sleep on, and the bathroom is at the end of the hall. Now if you'll excuse me, good-night." I replied, spinning on my heel, and heading into my room…

~*~*~*~*~*~(Heero's POV)

Quietly, I crept into the dark room, where only the sound of Relena's peaceful breathing could be heard. I stopped, gazing at the sight before me; the futon couch had been pulled out, neatly made with fresh, clean sheets. Made carefully, without a single wrinkle or intended crease. Slowly, timidly, I dared to look at the princess as she slumbered in her own bed; the sight was breath taking, one that would be imprinted in my memory forever. Her golden locks lay delicately scattered about the pillow and sheets, her ivory skin illuminated in the soft moonlight, as her exquisite lips curved into a small smile as she dreamt dreams that I couldn't begin to imagine. I tore my gaze away from the sleeping angel, trying to focus on the task of getting to bed and asleep, and unable to forget the fact that we were sleeping in the same room with less than six feet between us. I groaned, this was going to be a very long night…

~*~*~*~*~*~*~(Relena's POV)

I walked along the water's edge, under Heero's watchful eye, but still enjoying the salty breeze and the waves that lapped at my feet. I loved the ocean and the beach. I had so many memories on it's warm, golden banks. So many days spent in the sun, so many glorious sunsets, so much laughter and glee, but with it all… so many pained memories too. I turned to look at Heero, immediately meeting his gaze. Did he ever think of the first time we met whenever he came to the beach? Did he remember it as well as I did?

"…Heero?"

"Hn?"

"…What have I done to make you hate me so?" I inquired quietly. He stared at me a moment, his expression as cold and unfeeling as ever, like an invisible mask that was always in place…

"I don't hate you."

"Then why do you resent me? Why are you so cold towards me? I want to be close to you, but you won't let me near, why?! Why do you continue to push me away?" he looked away, and for a moment, I didn't think he was going to answer, and I turned away, just as his voice broke the silence,

"You don't want to be close to me. Everything that I touch dies. Even if I was suppose to protect it, I end up killing it myself. Besides," he turned to look at me, his eyes boring into mine, "feelings and friendship aren't needed in my job of protecting you."

"But wouldn't it cause one to strive more to protect someone they care about, rather than someone in which they are completely indifferent to?"

"Emotions and feelings cause mistakes-"

"Mistakes come with being human! You take them and you try to learn from them!" I nearly yelled

"Lives are lost because of mistakes!" he retorted, his voice raising as well,

"Is that what this is about?! You're afraid I'll die, because you made a mistake?"

"I'm not going to let you die when I can prevent it!!!"

"Dying is a part of life! You can't stop it! If I die, life will go on, the world will continue to turn, and tomorrow will come again! I'm not afraid to die, and you shouldn't be either!"

"No." he growled,

"I don't know why you are so set on my not dying. It's not like you wouldn't be relieved to be able to go back doing the one thing you know how to do, which is fighting-" I stopped, bowing my head slightly, "I'm sorry… I shouldn't have said that. But you need to move on and get your own life. Get away from here, from me, that way you won't be so miserable." I replied walking away

"Miserable?" a strong hand enveloped mine, "Relena I was miserable without you. Before I met you, I knew nothing but darkness and torment. I prayed that everyday would be my last, I hated life, hated myself, hated everyone…" he tilted my chin up, making me look at him, "but then I met you. Relena, you showed me things that I never knew existed, you taught me about life, taught me to love myself and to love my friends, you made me want to live. Relena, you mean more to me than anyone ever has. I'd be miserable without you…" he whispered.

"Heero…." I gasped, scarcely able to breathe. His eyes lost their icy façade, shining and sparkling with an emotion I knew I had seen before…

His face was so very near, his lips temptingly near, every fiber in me could almost feel his lips touch mine, almost taste his kiss, and my body ached for the intimate contact…

He brushed his lips against mine, causing a whimper to escape my lips, I felt him smile before continuing his sweet torture. His hand found its way into my hair, as the other pulled me against his chest, as he murmured enchanting words against my skin; gently he kissed me neck, and I could only breath his name, before entangling my fingers in his hair and press my body closer to his, feeling his body heat mixed with mine. He moved his caresses to my jaw line, never breaking the contact between his lips and my skin, he kissed my cheek and whispered my name, then brought his lips down onto mine for a long expected kiss…

Thunder exploded above us, as lightening shattered the sky. Heero snapped his head up o look at the once blue sky that was now black with the awaiting storm, a strong hand grabbed mine,

"Come on." we ran along the shore, making it to the safety of the apartment just as the rains came down. There we stood, panting slightly, in the doorway, my back against the door, my rush of adrenaline coming to it's end. I looked up at Heero, who reached up, gently caressing my cheek,

"Heero… I-" I began, but Heero put a finger to my lips, and shook his head,

"Don't say anything Relena. Please don't. I shouldn't have done what I did, but I can't say that I'm sorry I did it. I had no right to do that though." he looked away, dropping his hand, as sadness clouded his eyes, "It's just that… when you're near me… all of the pain goes away, and-" he seemed to be struggling so hard t find the words and to get them out, I stroked the side of his face, causing him to look at me,

"I understand." I whispered, he held my hand in both of his,

"How can you, when I don't understand it myself?" I wanted to say something, to tell him that I loved him, to ask if he felt the same way, but strangely… no words came, only silence, and somehow… that was enough…

~*To Be Continued*~

AN: Okay, let me know what you think of it. I hope you like it. More chapters soon to come, and hopefully the 1st chapter to my other new fic will be out soon too, K? R&R Bye!