Gundam Wing Fan Fiction ❯ The Palace of Justice ❯ 9 ( Chapter 9 )
[ Y - Young Adult: Not suitable for readers under 16 ]
9:
It was night when Wufei finally woke. Trowa first became aware of it when Wufei’s breathing changed, growing stronger and then more strained. He felt Wufei’s limbs twitching then and sat up, grateful for the light of Heero’s laptop and Heero sitting there, paused in his work and watching avidly, having noticed the same things as Trowa. Even then, it took a while. Trowa sat at his side the entire time until Wufei moaned and even Duo sat up, coming to stand with Heero and Trowa was suddenly unsure what to do with himself as Wufei’s eyes moved under the lids, struggling and then finally opening.
Trowa hadn’t realised he was holding his breath until he was forced to exhale and the forced parting of his lips made him smile slightly, the relief at seeing Wufei wake clear on his face where only Wufei could see it behind the fall of his hair.
“Tro.”
“Hey.” He didn’t know what to say, where to even begin, and Wufei looked exhausted already. Heero came to the rescue, a glass of water in one hand and he helped Wufei sit up and drink it in small sips that left him breathing heavy and sweating. He was weak and ill, just as Nataku had said he would be. It was a strange thing to witness, knowing what Wufei had been capable of.
“Where?”
“My Room. Still...on the colony.”
Wufei winced and let Heero lay him back down. He closed his eyes, frowning and breathing heavily for a few minutes before he regained his equilibrium, then he was staring at Trowa again and it was clear he was struggling to remember something so Trowa just waited patiently.
“You...how?”
“Frank brought him here, and he brought us here,” Duo supplied with a grin and Wufei’s gaze flickered away from Trowa to pin on Heero and Duo. He looked confused, not by the close contact but by their presence and it was enough to make Duo settle, moving to sit in Heero’s lap and Wufei’s gaze turned back to Trowa.
“It worked.” The relief in Wufei’s voice was so heavy it sank to the bottom of Trowa’s heart and anchored him there. Trowa reached out to take Wufei’s hand, rubbing his thumb across the back of it, smiling when Wufei squeezed back, weakly but aware of the touch and welcoming it. Or he might have been making a feeble attempt to fling the touch away, but Trowa didn’t particularly like that latter possibility so he went with the first.
“It’s okay. You’re safe. Just rest. We can talk in the morning.”
Wufei nodded and Heero and Duo moved back to the sleeping bag. The lights went out but Trowa was aware of Wufei’s gaze until his eyes finally slid shut and even then Wufei’s hand didn’t struggle to move away from his. Sleep came without dreams.
The lights came up in the morning and Trowa sat up blearily, but Heero and Duo were gone. There was a note taped to Heero’s laptop saying they’d gone to have breakfast and get supplies. It made Trowa smile faintly because it translated to ‘have some space and we’ll do the same’.
He got up and showered, taking his time, letting the water wash over his shoulders and down his back, washing away the fear and uncertainty of the last day, reminding himself Wufei was with them again now and was going to be okay. It wasn’t time to freak out anymore, it was time to get the job done. He pep talked himself through the shower in this fashion and came out with just the house pants on only to feel eyes watching him. He looked over at Wufei and felt the odd need to put on a shirt, but didn’t. He walked to the bed and knelt down beside it so he was eye to eye with Wufei and smiled.
“Morning.”
“I feel awful!”
“You don’t say.” And here he had thought you could spend a few years in a capsule full of green gunk with wires stuck in you via two hundred ports in your body and remain conscious while a computer stole control of your emotions and wake up just fine after it. But that Wufei sounded genuinely confused only made Trowa smile and he reached out to tuck Wufei’s hair behind his ear.
“Thank you.”
“I should have come sooner. I should’ve known you wouldn’t run away.”
“Run...What?” Wufei tried to sit up and failed and looked so completely furious at his predicament Trowa barely restrained his laughter, getting up instead and piling the pillows behind Wufei, helping him sit and then going to get more water. He suspected Wufei would be thirsty for a while yet. He got a jelly cup as well, just in case, pleased when Wufei showed a hint of interest in it.
“I never run away, from anything!”
“I know. I should’ve remembered.” But he’d been hurt by the continuous rejection, and the disappearance after the job interview had been the last straw. He’d gone home, Wufei being the only reason he’d tried Preventers to begin with when he came nagging at him to sign up, and once he was there the job bored him to tears. A holiday, he’d told everyone. Just a break, but he hadn’t bothered looking for a new job, hadn’t felt the desire to do anything at all. Besides mope, according to the emails Duo periodically sent him.
“I wondered what was taking you so long,” Wufei admitted grumpily. His hand was shaking around the glass of water but he was holding it and Trowa knew it had to be taking a great deal of strength, determination and concentration. Wufei looked like a small bird, breakable and delicate. Knowing what he had been, and what he would be again made it painful to see him this way and he tried to let none of his despair at the situation show, not wanting Wufei to feel embarrassed on top of everything else.
“So it was you who had Frank bring me here?”
“Frank?” Now Wufei looked thoroughly confused and Trowa did laugh, soft and warm and genuine.
“Duo’s pet name for the colony,” he explained and saw understanding dawn on Wufei’s face, followed by a scowl. His thoughts on the colony seemed unpleasant, and Trowa was far from surprised. If he felt inclined to blow the thing into oblivion, he could only imagine the things Wufei would want to do to it. He was sure it would have made a spectacular movie though, and wouldn’t have included words like ‘dude’ that would haunt them for however long it took Duo to get over it.
“No, I couldn’t...I made no decisions, the system did that. But I found I could force it to make the decision I wanted, whenever there were choices available.”
Pride swelled in Trowa’s chest and he didn’t dare say anything for fear he would sound like Duo when he opened his mouth. Dude, you so rock? Dude, you’re my hero? Dude, I’m in love with you and have been since that day you saved that kitten on our first Preventers assignment together and stowed it away in your sword bag until we got back to Preventers and you could hide it in your desk? Yeah, no, he did not need to open his mouth right now.
“So you made him save you.”
“It suited its plan. It had to get rid of me,” Wufei corrected. “I just forced it to let me live.”
For which Trowa was very grateful. He opened the jelly cup and stuck the spoon in, exchanging it for the empty glass of water and Wufei looked at it with a sigh before making his first attempt at eating. The spoon took a long time to get from the cup to Wufei’s mouth and Trowa made a mental note to make things that could use a straw for a while.
Trowa took the cup from him carefully, and didn’t bother saying anything, just put jelly on the spoon and held it near Wufei’s mouth. Wufei hesitated, but didn’t argue. Trowa suspected he was silently grateful he hadn’t had to ask.
“You look good.”
Trowa couldn’t say the same, and yet he sort of liked Wufei this way, forced to sit and do as Trowa wanted, quiet and curious about Trowa for once instead of gruff and insulated. He was quiet, feeding Wufei the jelly and trying not to think about too much. He didn’t want his head exploding, and the idea made him think of Wufei and the green vomiting explosion...definitely didn’t want his head exploding.
“So...you got the job, huh?”
Wufei scowled at him and Trowa just smiled at the familiar look, nodding his head. Yes, he was making light of the situation, no he didn’t have a good excuse except he doubted Wufei really wanted to think about much right now, and he wanted to see him smile. Selfish, but he didn’t care.
“Guess so. I said yes, figured I could go home and think about things.” Think about Them. If he chose Trowa he could have just rung them and said he changed his mind. If he chose the job he could tell Trowa and make a clean getaway. But he hadn’t even taken the job or signed a contract, they’d just taken him there and then and plugged him in. It made Trowa furious, the rage contained but simmering deep in his gut.
“Didn’t work out that way,” Wufei noted with a heavy sigh and his expression was pained. He lost interest in the jelly and Trowa didn’t push it. He could make fruit smoothies later, they’d always been more Wufei’s style anyway. He shifted around on the bed, tugging Wufei forward so he could climb in behind him, sitting up against the wall and pulling Wufei back against his chest, wriggling a little until it was comfortable and kissing Wufei’s temple. He could feel the heat of Wufei’s blush against his chest and smiled.
“Talk to me?”
It was a fool’s mistake, to stay quiet and unsure of what to say. Wufei had been so deprived of any kind of contact he could have told him about the three little pigs and he was sure Wufei would have listened. It was almost tempting, but instead he tried to think of something Wufei might be interested in, or at least something he hoped he was interested in.
“I took leave. Everyone kept saying you’d split, got sick of me nagging you, so I took leave. Une eventually convinced me to stay on as a consultant but I only ever got calls from Heero or Duo when they were stuck on something and needed extra hands. Didn’t bother getting a different job, did a few rounds with the circus though.”
“Did you get a pet monkey?”
Trowa was confused for a minute before he remembered a random lunch conversation about circuses and Wufei admitting he’d wanted a pet monkey growing up until one stole his drink in a park and then he’d held some weird vendetta against them ever since. It was nice, that he’d remembered.
“Uh...no. No pet monkey. I tried to get approval for an elephant but the body corporate on my property kept knocking me back.”
That finally won him a laugh, the gentle shaking of Wufei’s body like a soothing massage against his chest.
“You always get bored. Someone has to keep an eye on you, or...anything can happen.”
It just made Trowa sad, because Wufei had kept an eye on him and he hadn’t done the same. Even if he’d said no, and taken the job, if it had been an ordinary job to take, Wufei would have kept tabs on him, on everyone! He would’ve known where they were and what they were doing and who they were with and he would have sent one of those ridiculous empty red envelopes on new years with nothing in it. Trowa hated those things, he always ended up opening it, convincing himself this time it would be different and there would be something inside and Wufei was always so sneaky and hinting that this one was the one that was different, and always there was nothing inside.
He’d gone out and bought himself a red envelope last year, but it wasn’t the same at all.
“I don’t get bored when I’m with you.”
Wufei was quiet, but that was fine, Trowa hadn’t expected an answer. Wufei had never been big on talking when their relationship wasn’t completely screwed up, so it wasn’t exactly a surprise that he wasn’t big on talking about it now that it was. It took him a while to realise Wufei wasn’t talking because he was asleep again and then he just felt stupid.
Duo and Heero came back in mid-morning, by which time Trowa had extricated himself from the bed, leaving Wufei buried under the pile of blankets he felt compelled to wrap him in while he busied himself cutting up fruit and trying to dream up ways Frank might have gotten fruit. He ignored the most obvious option, that it was grown somewhere on site. That was just boring. It was much more fun thinking of laser microwaves that made fruit out of air, or a plantation somewhere that sent fruit to the colony by Molecularization, only that led him to wondering what lasting effects Molecularization had on things and whether the fruit was really safe to eat or would make his balls shrivel and fall off.
“Oooh, smoothies, good idea!” Duo’s smile was too excited as he stalked his way into the kitchenette. Trowa did not want to know what little nook or cranny they had found to get their rocks off in. “Wufei still asleep?”
“He was awake a few hours ago. Had some water and half a jelly cup, crashed again.”
“Huh. Least he ate something.”
Heero dumped another bag of bandages in the corner and went to sit at the laptop, getting straight back to work. Trowa didn’t need to look at Duo to know his eyes would be rolling. He handed him some pears and Duo didn’t need any further prompting, getting to work on peeling them and cutting them up with the rest of the fruit piles Trowa had made.
Wufei woke when they turned the blender on and hauled himself up against the pillows again. Trowa didn’t hear what he said, but Heero was talking to him softly and he left them to it while he finished Heero’s pineapple and orange. Duo had asked for every berry they had, Trowa was making himself pear, apple and honey and when he turned off the blender and took Heero his smoothie he looked expectantly at Wufei.
“What can we make you?”
“Um...I dunno, just put in whatever?” Meaning he didn’t want to have to think that hard and Trowa just nodded and went back to the kitchenette, grabbing Wufei’s cup before Duo could get his hands on it and putting together a mix he knew would suit Wufei’s tastes and help settle any queasiness in his stomach, which after you had vomited streams of green slush had to be there.
Duo turned the blender on again and made fast work of his berry smoothie, leaving it to Trowa to make up the last two while he went to sit with Heero and talk to Wufei. Trowa felt a stab of jealousy but focussed on getting lunch made because Wufei didn’t need him sitting there staring at him, he needed food, so food was what he was going to get. Sort of.
He finished them off and put a straw in each so Wufei didn’t get suspicious when he was the only one drinking with a straw, and when he took them over, Trowa dropped an extra straw in Duo’s cup as well, perfectly happy for Heero to look like the odd one out instead of Wufei.
“What are you working on?”
“A way out of here,” Heero replied immediately and Wufei winced, clearly feeling guilty that they were there at all but said nothing, just settled more comfortably on the pillows and sipped his smoothie. The sudden hint of interest on his face after the first sip was all the thanks Trowa needed.
“We figure next time they bring in a satellite we’ll rig it with a transmitter to send a message to Quatre for us, explaining what’s happened and giving them all the information we have on Frank. Get Quatre to bring a ship out here, get Frank to beam us on board and off we go Scotty.”
Trowa was glad he wasn’t the only one who looked a little confused, even if they did mostly get the gist of what Duo was saying.
“Quatre can’t come here,” Wufei noted immediately. “Send him the message, but he can’t be the one to come.” But he was frowning and Trowa suspected he was trying to figure out what he knew about the whole mess and not liking what he was remembering. It had to be strange, to remember decisions that weren’t your own and got made by someone else. Strange, Trowa thought, didn’t really begin to cover it but Wufei was just sitting there calmly frowning so he couldn’t be struggling too badly with it.
“Look...I need time to remember all the details, but the satellites. They started off as just...Frank? Seriously, why the hell did you call it Frank?”
Duo looked stunned, neither Heero or Trowa stepped up in his defence which left him sitting there glumly, pouting.
“Like Frankenstein.”
Wufei stared at him and eventually just shook his head, muttering something in Chinese that didn’t sound flattering at all, but it was always hard to tell with Chinese. He sipped at his smoothie and went his lips again before continuing, and Trowa nearly missed what he said, distracted by Wufei’s tongue when it came out to lick swiftly at the leftover milk in the corner of his mouth.
“They were just renewing the system surveillance, but there was something on one of the satellites and...Frank...started making plans. It has something to do with the Winners.”
“Peachy,” Duo grumbled, not because they wanted Quatre to be the one who came to the rescue, but more because Wufei was implying Frank had his own agenda and they all knew they weren’t leaving without figuring out what it was.
“Can this get any worse?” Duo didn’t expect an answer, which was good because he didn’t get one. Trowa wasn’t going to point out that they could all die slow horrible deaths, like maybe being re-Molecularized the wrong way around. If Duo started thinking along those lines none of them were going to get any sleep.
“You need to focus on getting stronger,” Heero noted softly. “Don’t worry about trying to remember anything just yet, but we’ll show you anything we have planned first and you can tell us if we need to change something, alright?”
Wufei nodded and held out his cup to Trowa. It wasn’t empty but it was far from full and he took it without comment, taking it to the sink and putting the leftover fruit away in the fridge to be used later. Duo had climbed up onto the bed to sit beside Wufei so Trowa felt entirely justified climbing in on his other side, though he was a little disappointed when Wufei made no move to shift any closer. He just seemed content to have them there, which wasn’t that amazing an epiphany when someone had been alone in a capsule for a few years.
Trowa booted up the Computer and selected ‘Movies’, letting Duo take over and find something to watch. He shifted himself closer to Wufei, feeling him stiffen for a moment when he pressed against his side, but then he relaxed and Trowa smiled as the heat of Wufei’s body reassured him and helped his own thoughts calm.
Duo had barely selected the movie and got it playing before Wufei was asleep, but Trowa and Duo stayed where they were and watched the film, having nothing better to do while Heero continued to try and gather intel on Frank and what was going on.
“If Frank’s the bad guy...what do we do?”
“Blow it up,” Heero responded immediately and Duo just snorted at the suggestion. “What?”
“There are innocent people here, Heero.”
“You don’t know they’re innocent.”
“They don’t deserve to die! Geez, Trowa tell him!”
Trowa did not tell him, but he thought it was amusing anyway. Sometimes it was good that certain things never changed.
“You’re both right. We get the people out, we kill Frank.” If only it would be that simple, he was still hoping they were completely on the wrong track and Frank was their friend, but it really depended on what Wufei could sort out in his head, and that could take too long. Heero wouldn’t wait for Wufei to have the facts straight, he would want to act as soon as the opportunity arose and Trowa understood the impulse. It wasn’t just their job anymore, it was very, very personal.
“That works,” Duo agreed, but he was looking at Trowa, waiting for him to continue. Trowa had thought that pretty much summed up what they would have to do.
“What?”
“How do we get the people out?”
“How the hell should I know! We don’t even know if that’s going to be necessary, I’m not about to waste a night thinking of a way to do it for shits and giggles?”
Duo just shrugged and flopped down on the sleeping bag, rummaging through his things for his laptop and distracting himself with writing down everything he could think of since he got here, much as Trowa had done because it was a good reference and they needed to send Quatre absolutely everything they could. Trowa wasted time downloading the manuals from the Computer to his laptop to send with his own notes, then got restless and decided to go for a walk. He couldn’t begin to say why other than if three was company, four was worse than a crowd.
“You’ll have to go to work tomorrow,” Heero warned and Trowa just shrugged it off as he pulled on his white suit.
“Have to go anyway if I’m going to find out when the next satellite is coming in.”
He just went into Chinatown station, surprising himself by going to the temple and going to wait in line. He had a candle he wanted to light but he wasn’t sure why he wanted to. Was it for Wufei? Himself? All of them? The hope that they would get home soon? Ever?
The people ahead of him did it with such ease, taking their candles and never missing a step as they went to the altar, found a free space and stuck their candle into the holder, lighting it and whispering softly under their breath. Trowa wondered what they prayed for, that it came with such ease. For little Johnny’s cold to go away? For his big sister’s new love affair to blossom into something deeper? For Father Joe not to get bored with yet another job and have to start over again? For Mother Jane to beat the depression she was slowly sliding into? The world felt so trivial.
He remained quiet and deep in thought as the line moved slowly and he eventually got to the pile of candles and took one, scanning his card to pay the donation fee and moving to the altar.
He stood in front of all the other candles, feeling a fraud. So many prayers and he doubted anyone was listening. He turned the candle over and over in his hands and the people around him came and left, leaving another wish in their wake and still he stood there, holding his candle and trying to figure out what he was doing.
Was he really here to make a wish, or to undo one? Did he really wish to forget about Wufei? He’d spent years pushing the feelings down inside, trying to move on. He’d wished for it to go away, hadn’t he? So what right did he have to stand here and pray to take the wish away, to let him keep the emotions swelling inside? And if he could keep them, shouldn’t he wish for them to get home safely? Could he really rely on something as fickle as a candle to light the way home?
He had no idea how long he stood there contemplating the art of wishing on a candle. Too long.
“You know, I think the general idea is just to light it.”
Startled, Trowa looked up at the monk, not at all mollified by his smile. He looked down at the candle and sighed, putting it in a free holder among the many and picking up a match, but he didn’t light it, looking at the monk and back again and then pointing at the candle.
“I don’t know why I’m lighting it.”
“Perhaps the desire to do so is reason enough?”
Perhaps it was. Trowa just shrugged and lit the damn thing. The monk stayed with him as he walked away and Trowa gave in to the temptation, moving off to a seat against the far wall, sitting wearily and letting his hands hang limp in his lap.
“You always seem troubled. Always quiet, always watching. Sometimes you just have to have faith that things are how they are supposed to be.”
Faith. He’d never been big on that one and Trowa was careful not to let his opinion of it show. Fate would have seen him die a thousand times. Taking fate in his own hands and wrenching it into what he needed had seen him live, and this time Wufei’s life was thrown into the mix, and Heero and Duo...
“I’m sorry. I’m just...”
“Trying to get the job done?” The monk smiled and held out a piece of paper. Trowa took it but didn’t look at it. “When I have a problem I cannot solve? I go there. It helps clear my head.”
“Thank you.” Because no matter what he personally believed, the man was trying to help him and Trowa understood that desire all too well. He smiled briefly and watched the man walk away, sitting quietly by himself for a long time before he finally opened the piece of paper.
He jerked upright and looked around for the monk but he was nowhere to be seen and Trowa looked back down at the piece of paper again.
Level 1, Hanger 101. There was no Hanger 101. He stuffed the piece of paper in his pocket and got up slowly, scanning the area for anyone who looked suspicious but the monk was nowhere to be seen and everyone was just going about their usual evening business. He shook his head, cast one last look at his candle and left, wandering back to His Room. A piece of paper shouldn’t have felt heavy, but this one did.
Wufei was awake again and Trowa met his gaze before he registered that Duo was making dinner while Heero continued to work. Trowa nodded at him and then fished the piece of paper out, dropping it in front of Heero.
“What is it?”
“Not sure. The monk at the temple gave it to me. He left before I got the chance to look at it. He said when he was troubled, he went here and it helped him clear his head.”
Duo was there immediately, looking over Heero’s shoulder while Trowa tried to convince himself he should give Wufei space and not go sit with him on the bed. He stood in the middle of the room instead, still unnerved that the monk had managed to sneak up on him at the altar, and that the man apparently had been military, or at least knew something about that level he shouldn’t have known.
“Look into it tomorrow,” Heero demanded and Trowa agreed with a silent nod. Wufei shrugged when they passed him the piece of paper, though one slender hand slid into his hair and clutched his head, as if he was chasing a memory and not quite catching it. Trowa figured it would come to him, or Trowa would get there and figure it out for him. Either way, they’d find out what was in Level 1’s Hanger 101.
“I’m going for a shower.”
“Be quick!” Duo called out, waving a spoon at him. “Dinner’s nearly ready!”
“...that’s ominous.” And he meant it. Duo could have made anything.
“That’s what I said,” Wufei grumbled and Trowa found himself smiling as he went in to grab his five minutes of alone time.
It was night when Wufei finally woke. Trowa first became aware of it when Wufei’s breathing changed, growing stronger and then more strained. He felt Wufei’s limbs twitching then and sat up, grateful for the light of Heero’s laptop and Heero sitting there, paused in his work and watching avidly, having noticed the same things as Trowa. Even then, it took a while. Trowa sat at his side the entire time until Wufei moaned and even Duo sat up, coming to stand with Heero and Trowa was suddenly unsure what to do with himself as Wufei’s eyes moved under the lids, struggling and then finally opening.
Trowa hadn’t realised he was holding his breath until he was forced to exhale and the forced parting of his lips made him smile slightly, the relief at seeing Wufei wake clear on his face where only Wufei could see it behind the fall of his hair.
“Tro.”
“Hey.” He didn’t know what to say, where to even begin, and Wufei looked exhausted already. Heero came to the rescue, a glass of water in one hand and he helped Wufei sit up and drink it in small sips that left him breathing heavy and sweating. He was weak and ill, just as Nataku had said he would be. It was a strange thing to witness, knowing what Wufei had been capable of.
“Where?”
“My Room. Still...on the colony.”
Wufei winced and let Heero lay him back down. He closed his eyes, frowning and breathing heavily for a few minutes before he regained his equilibrium, then he was staring at Trowa again and it was clear he was struggling to remember something so Trowa just waited patiently.
“You...how?”
“Frank brought him here, and he brought us here,” Duo supplied with a grin and Wufei’s gaze flickered away from Trowa to pin on Heero and Duo. He looked confused, not by the close contact but by their presence and it was enough to make Duo settle, moving to sit in Heero’s lap and Wufei’s gaze turned back to Trowa.
“It worked.” The relief in Wufei’s voice was so heavy it sank to the bottom of Trowa’s heart and anchored him there. Trowa reached out to take Wufei’s hand, rubbing his thumb across the back of it, smiling when Wufei squeezed back, weakly but aware of the touch and welcoming it. Or he might have been making a feeble attempt to fling the touch away, but Trowa didn’t particularly like that latter possibility so he went with the first.
“It’s okay. You’re safe. Just rest. We can talk in the morning.”
Wufei nodded and Heero and Duo moved back to the sleeping bag. The lights went out but Trowa was aware of Wufei’s gaze until his eyes finally slid shut and even then Wufei’s hand didn’t struggle to move away from his. Sleep came without dreams.
The lights came up in the morning and Trowa sat up blearily, but Heero and Duo were gone. There was a note taped to Heero’s laptop saying they’d gone to have breakfast and get supplies. It made Trowa smile faintly because it translated to ‘have some space and we’ll do the same’.
He got up and showered, taking his time, letting the water wash over his shoulders and down his back, washing away the fear and uncertainty of the last day, reminding himself Wufei was with them again now and was going to be okay. It wasn’t time to freak out anymore, it was time to get the job done. He pep talked himself through the shower in this fashion and came out with just the house pants on only to feel eyes watching him. He looked over at Wufei and felt the odd need to put on a shirt, but didn’t. He walked to the bed and knelt down beside it so he was eye to eye with Wufei and smiled.
“Morning.”
“I feel awful!”
“You don’t say.” And here he had thought you could spend a few years in a capsule full of green gunk with wires stuck in you via two hundred ports in your body and remain conscious while a computer stole control of your emotions and wake up just fine after it. But that Wufei sounded genuinely confused only made Trowa smile and he reached out to tuck Wufei’s hair behind his ear.
“Thank you.”
“I should have come sooner. I should’ve known you wouldn’t run away.”
“Run...What?” Wufei tried to sit up and failed and looked so completely furious at his predicament Trowa barely restrained his laughter, getting up instead and piling the pillows behind Wufei, helping him sit and then going to get more water. He suspected Wufei would be thirsty for a while yet. He got a jelly cup as well, just in case, pleased when Wufei showed a hint of interest in it.
“I never run away, from anything!”
“I know. I should’ve remembered.” But he’d been hurt by the continuous rejection, and the disappearance after the job interview had been the last straw. He’d gone home, Wufei being the only reason he’d tried Preventers to begin with when he came nagging at him to sign up, and once he was there the job bored him to tears. A holiday, he’d told everyone. Just a break, but he hadn’t bothered looking for a new job, hadn’t felt the desire to do anything at all. Besides mope, according to the emails Duo periodically sent him.
“I wondered what was taking you so long,” Wufei admitted grumpily. His hand was shaking around the glass of water but he was holding it and Trowa knew it had to be taking a great deal of strength, determination and concentration. Wufei looked like a small bird, breakable and delicate. Knowing what he had been, and what he would be again made it painful to see him this way and he tried to let none of his despair at the situation show, not wanting Wufei to feel embarrassed on top of everything else.
“So it was you who had Frank bring me here?”
“Frank?” Now Wufei looked thoroughly confused and Trowa did laugh, soft and warm and genuine.
“Duo’s pet name for the colony,” he explained and saw understanding dawn on Wufei’s face, followed by a scowl. His thoughts on the colony seemed unpleasant, and Trowa was far from surprised. If he felt inclined to blow the thing into oblivion, he could only imagine the things Wufei would want to do to it. He was sure it would have made a spectacular movie though, and wouldn’t have included words like ‘dude’ that would haunt them for however long it took Duo to get over it.
“No, I couldn’t...I made no decisions, the system did that. But I found I could force it to make the decision I wanted, whenever there were choices available.”
Pride swelled in Trowa’s chest and he didn’t dare say anything for fear he would sound like Duo when he opened his mouth. Dude, you so rock? Dude, you’re my hero? Dude, I’m in love with you and have been since that day you saved that kitten on our first Preventers assignment together and stowed it away in your sword bag until we got back to Preventers and you could hide it in your desk? Yeah, no, he did not need to open his mouth right now.
“So you made him save you.”
“It suited its plan. It had to get rid of me,” Wufei corrected. “I just forced it to let me live.”
For which Trowa was very grateful. He opened the jelly cup and stuck the spoon in, exchanging it for the empty glass of water and Wufei looked at it with a sigh before making his first attempt at eating. The spoon took a long time to get from the cup to Wufei’s mouth and Trowa made a mental note to make things that could use a straw for a while.
Trowa took the cup from him carefully, and didn’t bother saying anything, just put jelly on the spoon and held it near Wufei’s mouth. Wufei hesitated, but didn’t argue. Trowa suspected he was silently grateful he hadn’t had to ask.
“You look good.”
Trowa couldn’t say the same, and yet he sort of liked Wufei this way, forced to sit and do as Trowa wanted, quiet and curious about Trowa for once instead of gruff and insulated. He was quiet, feeding Wufei the jelly and trying not to think about too much. He didn’t want his head exploding, and the idea made him think of Wufei and the green vomiting explosion...definitely didn’t want his head exploding.
“So...you got the job, huh?”
Wufei scowled at him and Trowa just smiled at the familiar look, nodding his head. Yes, he was making light of the situation, no he didn’t have a good excuse except he doubted Wufei really wanted to think about much right now, and he wanted to see him smile. Selfish, but he didn’t care.
“Guess so. I said yes, figured I could go home and think about things.” Think about Them. If he chose Trowa he could have just rung them and said he changed his mind. If he chose the job he could tell Trowa and make a clean getaway. But he hadn’t even taken the job or signed a contract, they’d just taken him there and then and plugged him in. It made Trowa furious, the rage contained but simmering deep in his gut.
“Didn’t work out that way,” Wufei noted with a heavy sigh and his expression was pained. He lost interest in the jelly and Trowa didn’t push it. He could make fruit smoothies later, they’d always been more Wufei’s style anyway. He shifted around on the bed, tugging Wufei forward so he could climb in behind him, sitting up against the wall and pulling Wufei back against his chest, wriggling a little until it was comfortable and kissing Wufei’s temple. He could feel the heat of Wufei’s blush against his chest and smiled.
“Talk to me?”
It was a fool’s mistake, to stay quiet and unsure of what to say. Wufei had been so deprived of any kind of contact he could have told him about the three little pigs and he was sure Wufei would have listened. It was almost tempting, but instead he tried to think of something Wufei might be interested in, or at least something he hoped he was interested in.
“I took leave. Everyone kept saying you’d split, got sick of me nagging you, so I took leave. Une eventually convinced me to stay on as a consultant but I only ever got calls from Heero or Duo when they were stuck on something and needed extra hands. Didn’t bother getting a different job, did a few rounds with the circus though.”
“Did you get a pet monkey?”
Trowa was confused for a minute before he remembered a random lunch conversation about circuses and Wufei admitting he’d wanted a pet monkey growing up until one stole his drink in a park and then he’d held some weird vendetta against them ever since. It was nice, that he’d remembered.
“Uh...no. No pet monkey. I tried to get approval for an elephant but the body corporate on my property kept knocking me back.”
That finally won him a laugh, the gentle shaking of Wufei’s body like a soothing massage against his chest.
“You always get bored. Someone has to keep an eye on you, or...anything can happen.”
It just made Trowa sad, because Wufei had kept an eye on him and he hadn’t done the same. Even if he’d said no, and taken the job, if it had been an ordinary job to take, Wufei would have kept tabs on him, on everyone! He would’ve known where they were and what they were doing and who they were with and he would have sent one of those ridiculous empty red envelopes on new years with nothing in it. Trowa hated those things, he always ended up opening it, convincing himself this time it would be different and there would be something inside and Wufei was always so sneaky and hinting that this one was the one that was different, and always there was nothing inside.
He’d gone out and bought himself a red envelope last year, but it wasn’t the same at all.
“I don’t get bored when I’m with you.”
Wufei was quiet, but that was fine, Trowa hadn’t expected an answer. Wufei had never been big on talking when their relationship wasn’t completely screwed up, so it wasn’t exactly a surprise that he wasn’t big on talking about it now that it was. It took him a while to realise Wufei wasn’t talking because he was asleep again and then he just felt stupid.
Duo and Heero came back in mid-morning, by which time Trowa had extricated himself from the bed, leaving Wufei buried under the pile of blankets he felt compelled to wrap him in while he busied himself cutting up fruit and trying to dream up ways Frank might have gotten fruit. He ignored the most obvious option, that it was grown somewhere on site. That was just boring. It was much more fun thinking of laser microwaves that made fruit out of air, or a plantation somewhere that sent fruit to the colony by Molecularization, only that led him to wondering what lasting effects Molecularization had on things and whether the fruit was really safe to eat or would make his balls shrivel and fall off.
“Oooh, smoothies, good idea!” Duo’s smile was too excited as he stalked his way into the kitchenette. Trowa did not want to know what little nook or cranny they had found to get their rocks off in. “Wufei still asleep?”
“He was awake a few hours ago. Had some water and half a jelly cup, crashed again.”
“Huh. Least he ate something.”
Heero dumped another bag of bandages in the corner and went to sit at the laptop, getting straight back to work. Trowa didn’t need to look at Duo to know his eyes would be rolling. He handed him some pears and Duo didn’t need any further prompting, getting to work on peeling them and cutting them up with the rest of the fruit piles Trowa had made.
Wufei woke when they turned the blender on and hauled himself up against the pillows again. Trowa didn’t hear what he said, but Heero was talking to him softly and he left them to it while he finished Heero’s pineapple and orange. Duo had asked for every berry they had, Trowa was making himself pear, apple and honey and when he turned off the blender and took Heero his smoothie he looked expectantly at Wufei.
“What can we make you?”
“Um...I dunno, just put in whatever?” Meaning he didn’t want to have to think that hard and Trowa just nodded and went back to the kitchenette, grabbing Wufei’s cup before Duo could get his hands on it and putting together a mix he knew would suit Wufei’s tastes and help settle any queasiness in his stomach, which after you had vomited streams of green slush had to be there.
Duo turned the blender on again and made fast work of his berry smoothie, leaving it to Trowa to make up the last two while he went to sit with Heero and talk to Wufei. Trowa felt a stab of jealousy but focussed on getting lunch made because Wufei didn’t need him sitting there staring at him, he needed food, so food was what he was going to get. Sort of.
He finished them off and put a straw in each so Wufei didn’t get suspicious when he was the only one drinking with a straw, and when he took them over, Trowa dropped an extra straw in Duo’s cup as well, perfectly happy for Heero to look like the odd one out instead of Wufei.
“What are you working on?”
“A way out of here,” Heero replied immediately and Wufei winced, clearly feeling guilty that they were there at all but said nothing, just settled more comfortably on the pillows and sipped his smoothie. The sudden hint of interest on his face after the first sip was all the thanks Trowa needed.
“We figure next time they bring in a satellite we’ll rig it with a transmitter to send a message to Quatre for us, explaining what’s happened and giving them all the information we have on Frank. Get Quatre to bring a ship out here, get Frank to beam us on board and off we go Scotty.”
Trowa was glad he wasn’t the only one who looked a little confused, even if they did mostly get the gist of what Duo was saying.
“Quatre can’t come here,” Wufei noted immediately. “Send him the message, but he can’t be the one to come.” But he was frowning and Trowa suspected he was trying to figure out what he knew about the whole mess and not liking what he was remembering. It had to be strange, to remember decisions that weren’t your own and got made by someone else. Strange, Trowa thought, didn’t really begin to cover it but Wufei was just sitting there calmly frowning so he couldn’t be struggling too badly with it.
“Look...I need time to remember all the details, but the satellites. They started off as just...Frank? Seriously, why the hell did you call it Frank?”
Duo looked stunned, neither Heero or Trowa stepped up in his defence which left him sitting there glumly, pouting.
“Like Frankenstein.”
Wufei stared at him and eventually just shook his head, muttering something in Chinese that didn’t sound flattering at all, but it was always hard to tell with Chinese. He sipped at his smoothie and went his lips again before continuing, and Trowa nearly missed what he said, distracted by Wufei’s tongue when it came out to lick swiftly at the leftover milk in the corner of his mouth.
“They were just renewing the system surveillance, but there was something on one of the satellites and...Frank...started making plans. It has something to do with the Winners.”
“Peachy,” Duo grumbled, not because they wanted Quatre to be the one who came to the rescue, but more because Wufei was implying Frank had his own agenda and they all knew they weren’t leaving without figuring out what it was.
“Can this get any worse?” Duo didn’t expect an answer, which was good because he didn’t get one. Trowa wasn’t going to point out that they could all die slow horrible deaths, like maybe being re-Molecularized the wrong way around. If Duo started thinking along those lines none of them were going to get any sleep.
“You need to focus on getting stronger,” Heero noted softly. “Don’t worry about trying to remember anything just yet, but we’ll show you anything we have planned first and you can tell us if we need to change something, alright?”
Wufei nodded and held out his cup to Trowa. It wasn’t empty but it was far from full and he took it without comment, taking it to the sink and putting the leftover fruit away in the fridge to be used later. Duo had climbed up onto the bed to sit beside Wufei so Trowa felt entirely justified climbing in on his other side, though he was a little disappointed when Wufei made no move to shift any closer. He just seemed content to have them there, which wasn’t that amazing an epiphany when someone had been alone in a capsule for a few years.
Trowa booted up the Computer and selected ‘Movies’, letting Duo take over and find something to watch. He shifted himself closer to Wufei, feeling him stiffen for a moment when he pressed against his side, but then he relaxed and Trowa smiled as the heat of Wufei’s body reassured him and helped his own thoughts calm.
Duo had barely selected the movie and got it playing before Wufei was asleep, but Trowa and Duo stayed where they were and watched the film, having nothing better to do while Heero continued to try and gather intel on Frank and what was going on.
“If Frank’s the bad guy...what do we do?”
“Blow it up,” Heero responded immediately and Duo just snorted at the suggestion. “What?”
“There are innocent people here, Heero.”
“You don’t know they’re innocent.”
“They don’t deserve to die! Geez, Trowa tell him!”
Trowa did not tell him, but he thought it was amusing anyway. Sometimes it was good that certain things never changed.
“You’re both right. We get the people out, we kill Frank.” If only it would be that simple, he was still hoping they were completely on the wrong track and Frank was their friend, but it really depended on what Wufei could sort out in his head, and that could take too long. Heero wouldn’t wait for Wufei to have the facts straight, he would want to act as soon as the opportunity arose and Trowa understood the impulse. It wasn’t just their job anymore, it was very, very personal.
“That works,” Duo agreed, but he was looking at Trowa, waiting for him to continue. Trowa had thought that pretty much summed up what they would have to do.
“What?”
“How do we get the people out?”
“How the hell should I know! We don’t even know if that’s going to be necessary, I’m not about to waste a night thinking of a way to do it for shits and giggles?”
Duo just shrugged and flopped down on the sleeping bag, rummaging through his things for his laptop and distracting himself with writing down everything he could think of since he got here, much as Trowa had done because it was a good reference and they needed to send Quatre absolutely everything they could. Trowa wasted time downloading the manuals from the Computer to his laptop to send with his own notes, then got restless and decided to go for a walk. He couldn’t begin to say why other than if three was company, four was worse than a crowd.
“You’ll have to go to work tomorrow,” Heero warned and Trowa just shrugged it off as he pulled on his white suit.
“Have to go anyway if I’m going to find out when the next satellite is coming in.”
He just went into Chinatown station, surprising himself by going to the temple and going to wait in line. He had a candle he wanted to light but he wasn’t sure why he wanted to. Was it for Wufei? Himself? All of them? The hope that they would get home soon? Ever?
The people ahead of him did it with such ease, taking their candles and never missing a step as they went to the altar, found a free space and stuck their candle into the holder, lighting it and whispering softly under their breath. Trowa wondered what they prayed for, that it came with such ease. For little Johnny’s cold to go away? For his big sister’s new love affair to blossom into something deeper? For Father Joe not to get bored with yet another job and have to start over again? For Mother Jane to beat the depression she was slowly sliding into? The world felt so trivial.
He remained quiet and deep in thought as the line moved slowly and he eventually got to the pile of candles and took one, scanning his card to pay the donation fee and moving to the altar.
He stood in front of all the other candles, feeling a fraud. So many prayers and he doubted anyone was listening. He turned the candle over and over in his hands and the people around him came and left, leaving another wish in their wake and still he stood there, holding his candle and trying to figure out what he was doing.
Was he really here to make a wish, or to undo one? Did he really wish to forget about Wufei? He’d spent years pushing the feelings down inside, trying to move on. He’d wished for it to go away, hadn’t he? So what right did he have to stand here and pray to take the wish away, to let him keep the emotions swelling inside? And if he could keep them, shouldn’t he wish for them to get home safely? Could he really rely on something as fickle as a candle to light the way home?
He had no idea how long he stood there contemplating the art of wishing on a candle. Too long.
“You know, I think the general idea is just to light it.”
Startled, Trowa looked up at the monk, not at all mollified by his smile. He looked down at the candle and sighed, putting it in a free holder among the many and picking up a match, but he didn’t light it, looking at the monk and back again and then pointing at the candle.
“I don’t know why I’m lighting it.”
“Perhaps the desire to do so is reason enough?”
Perhaps it was. Trowa just shrugged and lit the damn thing. The monk stayed with him as he walked away and Trowa gave in to the temptation, moving off to a seat against the far wall, sitting wearily and letting his hands hang limp in his lap.
“You always seem troubled. Always quiet, always watching. Sometimes you just have to have faith that things are how they are supposed to be.”
Faith. He’d never been big on that one and Trowa was careful not to let his opinion of it show. Fate would have seen him die a thousand times. Taking fate in his own hands and wrenching it into what he needed had seen him live, and this time Wufei’s life was thrown into the mix, and Heero and Duo...
“I’m sorry. I’m just...”
“Trying to get the job done?” The monk smiled and held out a piece of paper. Trowa took it but didn’t look at it. “When I have a problem I cannot solve? I go there. It helps clear my head.”
“Thank you.” Because no matter what he personally believed, the man was trying to help him and Trowa understood that desire all too well. He smiled briefly and watched the man walk away, sitting quietly by himself for a long time before he finally opened the piece of paper.
He jerked upright and looked around for the monk but he was nowhere to be seen and Trowa looked back down at the piece of paper again.
Level 1, Hanger 101. There was no Hanger 101. He stuffed the piece of paper in his pocket and got up slowly, scanning the area for anyone who looked suspicious but the monk was nowhere to be seen and everyone was just going about their usual evening business. He shook his head, cast one last look at his candle and left, wandering back to His Room. A piece of paper shouldn’t have felt heavy, but this one did.
Wufei was awake again and Trowa met his gaze before he registered that Duo was making dinner while Heero continued to work. Trowa nodded at him and then fished the piece of paper out, dropping it in front of Heero.
“What is it?”
“Not sure. The monk at the temple gave it to me. He left before I got the chance to look at it. He said when he was troubled, he went here and it helped him clear his head.”
Duo was there immediately, looking over Heero’s shoulder while Trowa tried to convince himself he should give Wufei space and not go sit with him on the bed. He stood in the middle of the room instead, still unnerved that the monk had managed to sneak up on him at the altar, and that the man apparently had been military, or at least knew something about that level he shouldn’t have known.
“Look into it tomorrow,” Heero demanded and Trowa agreed with a silent nod. Wufei shrugged when they passed him the piece of paper, though one slender hand slid into his hair and clutched his head, as if he was chasing a memory and not quite catching it. Trowa figured it would come to him, or Trowa would get there and figure it out for him. Either way, they’d find out what was in Level 1’s Hanger 101.
“I’m going for a shower.”
“Be quick!” Duo called out, waving a spoon at him. “Dinner’s nearly ready!”
“...that’s ominous.” And he meant it. Duo could have made anything.
“That’s what I said,” Wufei grumbled and Trowa found himself smiling as he went in to grab his five minutes of alone time.